411’s ROH on HDNet Report 11.05.09: McGuinness vs. Cabana (11.02.09)

Mike Hogewood and Dave Prazak introduce us to the show and hype the main event of Colt Cabana vs. Nigel McGuinness, and Prazak discusses the “rumors” with McGuinness’ future. What rumors where? Who’s Nigel? Does he have anything to do with that Desmond Wolfe guy?

The Briscoes (Jay & Mark) vs. The Young Bucks (Matt & Nick Jackson)
“This should be good.” – James Raynor. Handshakes as expected, and Jay and Matt start things out. They do some chain wrestling, and not the uber-fast chain wrestling you see in TNA that ruins believability. Jay gets the first big move with a hurracanrana. Matt responds by rolling back and catching him with a headscissors, they do some more moves and INDY STANDOFF! We switch to Nick and Mark, and Mark makes my day by just powering Nick down to the mat and grabbing a headlock. Mark gets a fireman’s carry and stays in control with an armbar until Nick hits a dropkick, and then he hits an armdrag and keeps his own armbar. They start doing the trademark rapid tags and flying attacks to the arm, but sadly, no moonsault. Mark puts an end to that by backing Nick into the corner and hitting a series of back elbows and then jabs to the ribs. Jay comes in and hits a huge doublestomp to Nick and then knocks Matt off of the apron. Jay stays in control with strikes, but telegraphs a backdrop and Nick is able to tag Matt in, and he tosses Nick into a missile dropkick on Jay.

Matt only gets two, and then does an ill-advised exchange of strikes with Jay. Mark gets a blind tag and the Briscoes hit Matt with an STO/Fox Kick combination. Mark only gets two and applies a figure-four headscissors. Mark takes over with strikes and then hits a northern lights suplex for two. Nick gets a blind tag and hits a spinning kick to the gut, and hits a gutbuster. Matt hits the ropes and hits the corkscrew neckbreaker that drops Mark across Nick’s knee like a backbreaker. I love that double-team but it only gets two. Matt gets cocky with elbows and hits the ropes, but Jay casually shoves Mark out of the way and PLANTS Matt with a spinebuster. That was glorious. Mark only gets two and tags out to Jay, who gets two off of a suplex. Mark is tagged back in and they hit the double football tackles, but Matt still kicks out at two. Mark gets two more off of a suplex, and Jay tags back in. Double biel by the Briscoes but again only two. Mark is in, Russian Legsweep gets two. Jay is in, and they go for a double clothesline, but Matt dodges and sends them into each other, and then drives Mark’s neck across his knee. HOT TAG TO NICK!

Nick takes out Jay with a springboard crossbody, hits dropkicks to both men and a spinning wheel kick to Mark, but Jay just decks him. Jay throws Nick to the ropes but Nick kicks him in the face, then tosses Mark to the floor, and hits a moonsault off the apron. Nick hits a slingshot x-factor on Jay and Matt drops an elbow, but Mark breaks up the cover. Mark tosses Matt to the floor, Nick hits some strikes but Mark hits a clothesline. Matt is back up and dives off the top rope…into Mark’s side exploder suplex. He whips Nick to Jay and Jay covers for two. The Briscoes want the Doomsday Device, but Matt shoves Mark to the floor and Nick rolls up Jay, 1…2…NO! Jay makes the mistake of whipping Matt to the corner, and Matt jumps over him so that Nick can hit a superkick. Matt looks to set up More Bang For Your Buck, but the Dark City Fight Club is out. Great. They toss out the Bucks and we get a pull-apart brawl between the Briscoes and the DCFC.
Winner: No Contest (via Dark City Fight Club Intereference) ***

All teams are looking to fight ROH Tag Team Champions, Eddie Edwards and Davey Richards. Speaking of them, The American Wolves have their hands full next week as they face Bryan Danielson and Roderick Strong.

We now get Danielson’s Number 4 Moment, his match with Nigel at Domination ’07, which was taped for Driven. It’s one of the all time best ROH matches and my pick for match of the year in 2007. He talks about going to the hospital with Jimmy Rave and the bonds he has with these people. I’m guessing two of the next three will be the match with KENTA and his title victory over James “Jamie Noble” Gibson, but what could the other one be?

Kyle Durdan is in the back with The Wolves. Davey is wearing his American Wolves T-Shirt to prove a point. Everyone else is wearing final countdown t-shirts, but not him. ROH isn’t about Bryan Danielson, or where he’s been, or where’s he going. It’s about the American Wolves. Durdan said it was the second-to-last stop on the tour. “You DARE overlook us?” Davey promises that THIS will be his last stop. Kyle tries to put over the historic significance. If looks could kill, Kyle would be dead. Eddie says that the Wolves are history, they make history, and they are the greatest tag team in ROH history. “Tonight” the hunt is on. Um…you’d think they could retape it for continuity’s sake? Aside from that, GREAT promo from Richards.

Alex Payne vs. Rhett Titus
Will this be Payne’s “big win”? Huge “Hepatitus” chant, which ranks as one of the more clever chants ever thought up, along with “Power Ranger” for MVP. Payne throws a roll of toilet paper in Titus’ face. Titus gets a fireman’s carry and grabs an armbar. Payne knips up and works an arm wringer, but Rhett hits a drop toehold and applies a front facelock. We get some thrusting and Payne hits an inverted atomic drop, and then does some of his own thrusting. He hits the ropes and Rhett hits a knee to the face. Rhett tries to stay in control but Payne counters a hip toss to an arm drag (actually a “body” drag, but whatever). He hits a real armdrag and keeps an armbar, but Rhett hits a knee and tosses Payne to the apron. Alex hits a shoulder to the gut, but Rhett dropkicks him when he tries to slingshot in. It only gets two and Rhett decks Alex before strutting and thrusting. He covers for two.

Payne gets a jawbreaker, but Rhett gets a go behind and hits a knee to the gut. If he can get the swing faster that would be a great move to keep. He follows with a yakuza kick for two. Rhett goes for a crucifix powerbomb but Alex counters to a rana. Payne throws some punches and rolls Titus up for a two-count. He shoves Titus to the ropes and gets an awkward German Suplex for two. Titus reverses a corner whip but runs into a boot. Alex goes for the rolling stunner but Titus blocks it, and schoolboy with a handful of tights gets the three count.
Winner: Rhett Titus (via schoolboy with tights) **

We get highlights of Glory By Honor VIII. This includes psuedo-highlights of the Ladder War, Jim Cornette returning to say that Sarah Palin will lapdance Barack Obama before he’s 100% behind Vince Russo, and the streamer treatment for Nigel and Bryan. I have to buy that show.

Skullcrusher Rasche Brown cuts a promo where he says that he got in a fight with seven men and took out thirteen eyeballs. He left the last one because “he’s a considerate man”. This guy has charisma to spare. If he delivers in the ring, ROH could have a valuable commodity on their hands.

Tyler Black is here to give us an update on Jerry Lynn. He says Jerry is at home and resting, but it’s a shame that that he’s injured, because it wasn’t his fault. Nigel says up and says that this isn’t “Good Will Hunting”, it’s pro wrestling. If Jerry stepped in the ring, any injury he gets is his fault. He also tells Tyler the belt is cursed and he should really reconsider his plans to be the next world champion. Tyler says that the belt isn’t cursed; it’s his dream, and he will be ROH World Champion.

Grizzly Redwood vs. Claudio Castagnoli w/Prince Nana & Ernie Osiris
Claudio starts this off by slapping Grizzly with his glove. Terrific. Grizzly tries to chop the legs but Claudio keeps moving, so Grizzly settles for hitting Ernie Osiris instead. HUGE BICYCLE KICK. Claudio deadlifts Grizzly and just slams him back down. Grizzly ducks a clothesline. Actually, he didn’t duck, he’s just so short that Claudio missed. Claudio blocks a springboard crossbody and does the multiple military presses. If he starts doing push-ups I’m gonna die. Grizzly avoids an elbow drop but not a biel. He does an upside down airplane spin WITH HIS ARMS ON HIS WAIST! ***** Oh wait, there’s more? Grizzly avoids a corner charge and gets a foot to the face. DOWN COME THE SUSPENDERS! Grizzly dives but Claudio catches him, POP UP EUROPEAN UPPERCUT! This is over. RIIIIIIIIIICCOLA BOMB jackknife style, and Claudio wins in glorious fashion. SLAP THE PORPOISE!
Winner: Claudio Castagnoli (via Release Riccola Bomb) **

Ernie gets a few shots in and gets some scissors, but Necro Butcher comes out for the save. Redwood apparently wants a Beard vs. Beard match with Ernie.

We get an interview with Kenny King. People ask him why he isn’t remorseful. He says this isn’t ballet and injuries happen. It’s a young man’s game, not for old folks. He does feel sorry that Jerry can’t buy groceries, but he isn’t sorry that he got injured.

Colt Cabana vs. Nigel McGuinness
We get a loud “Thank you Nigel” chant. They start with chain wrestling and Colt botches a cartwheel. He runs with it though and just messes around a bit. Nigel claps and struggles to maintain kayfabe. Nigel extends his right hand and Colt extends his left. Nigel quickly switches to his left but Cabana gets an armdrag. Nigel backs Colt into the ropes and hits an elbow. A snapmare follows and then a modified cobra clutch that’s more of a choke than a half-nelson. Colt reverses to a hammerlock, and this triggers a long series of British chain wrestling which is fun to watch but hard to call. Nigel gets Colt in the ropes but kicks the top rope to hurt Colt’s shoulder. He declares that he is the “Best Wrestler In The World”. He throws Cabana outside and mocks the fans.

Nigel shoves Colt into the barricade and takes him inside, and the hammerlock divorce court connects. Nigel goes to work on the arm and fakes a bow-and-arrow stretch before applying “Nigel Armhold Number 5” because I’ve given up trying to describe it. It’s the reverse short-arm scissors/keylock/whatever. Colt turns it into a pin but Nigel counters into an omoplata and wristlocks the other arm. Colt escapes with elbows but Nigel takes him down and drops a knee on the arm. He rolls Cabana to his stomach and applies the London Bridge. Colt rolls out so Nigel kicks him in the head and hits a forearm. Colt starts countering the arm wringers with forearm shots, and he ducks a lariat and and goes to the playbook of Dusty Rhodes with a flurry of bionic elbows.

Colt dodges Nigel and rolls him up for two. He sends Nigel to the corner and hits a forearm, and then to the other corner, but Nigel avoids the Flying Asshole and hits the kick to the back/downward lariat combo. Nigel sets up for the Tower of London but Colt avoids it, tries a sunset flip but Nigel blocks and drops a knee to the sternum for two. Nigel goes for the Jawbreaker but Colt grabs his legs and throws him to the mat, and then leaps over him and hooks Nigel’s legs with his own legs for two. Cabana goes up top but Nigel goes for the Tower of London. He opts to go to the apron, probably to tease the crowd, but Colt slinks to the apron and hits a kick. That sets up the Flying Asshole and Colt hits the Asai Moonsault on the floor.

Colt throws Nigel inside and gets a big splash for two. Cabana goes for the Colt 45, but Nigel drives him to the corner and hits a back elbow. He hits the corner to do the European Uppercut and Colt gets his feet up, but Nigel catches them and shoves them to the ropes, TOWER OF LONDON! It only gets two, but that was a great sequence. Nigel goes for a lariat but Cabana ducks, and he loos to go for the Vertebreaker? No, he drops to his knees for a backbreaker, and that gets three. I guess you could call that the inverted Colt 45. Good match, but I love this style of wrestling. Your mileage may vary.
Winner: Colt Cabana (via Inverted Colt 45) ***1/4

Next week, we get our first interview with Jim Cornette and the huge tag team main event.