100 Percent Fordified: CHIKARA Let ’em Eat Cake

Wolverhampton, England – 4.4.2015

Championship Rundown
Grand Champion: Icarus
Campeones de Parejas: The Devastation Corporation (Max Smashmaster & Blaster McMassive)
Young Lions Cup Champion: Heidi Lovelace

Commentary is provided by Mike Quackenbush and Leonard F. Chikarason.

Los Ice Creams say they will bring glory back to Princess Kimberlee when they return to “Los Estados Unidos” after they defeat The Throwbacks.

Challenge of the Immortals
The Throwbacks (Dasher Hatfield & ‘Mr. Touchdown’ Mark Angelosetti) vs. Los Ice Creams (El Hijo del Ice Cream & Ice Cream Jr.)

The Throwbacks are representing Dasher’s Dugout while Los Ice Creams are representing Crown & Court. Angelosetti spikes a football instead of an American football. A young male child is unofficially managing the Throwbacks. Jr. knees Angelosetti in the mid-section. He distracts Bryce Remsburg so Hijo can strike Angelosetti with a kendo stick! The child stooges Hijo off, and Bryce gives Hijo a public warning. Jr. splashes Hatfield multiple times in the corner. Los Ice Creams recruit Sophie Sparham from the crowd and use her feet first as a battering ram into Hatfield. Hatfield drives Hijo back first to the corner upon recovering. The Throwbacks double hip toss him into tandem falling headbutts. Angelosetti slingshots Hatfield in for an armdrag on Hijo. Hijo avoids a backdrop and pinches his fanny. Hatfeild chops him, causing Hijo to cry. He kicks Hatfield in the leg. Hatfield reverses an Irish whip to the corner. He runs the bases and lands a baseball slide to Hijo. He drop toe holds Jr. into a Romero Stretch. Angelosetti bulldogs Jr. out of it. Angelosetti lands some splashes. He goes for another when Hijo trips him from the floor. Angelosetti chases him back into the ring. Hatfield tags in, only for Jr. to use Hijo as a battering ram and driving his feet into his feet. Angelosetti spears Hijo. Angelosetti then chases Jr. around the ring. Jr. catches him with an elbow drop to the back as they get into the ring. He lands a legdrop for a one count. Los Ice Creams isolate Angelosetti until foolishly, Hijo pulls him to the floor in the hopes of baiting him into an elbow drop. Angelosetti hits a slingshot shoulder block to Hijo. Jr. attacks Angelosetti. The young fan is back on the apron with Hatfield rooting on his partner. Angelosetti gives Hijo an atomic and Manhattan drop before giving him a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker. Hatfield tags in. He uses the young fan as a battering ram on both of Los Ice Creams, then sit him down on Jr.’s chest. Bryce counts three, giving the Throwbacks the win at 14:36. This was very fun, pretty much exactly the type of match these two teams should have. Los Ice Creams were goofy, but not stupid, and looked competent, which is not always the case. Pretty much this was the best these two teams could have possibly done together. **¾

Prakash Sabar makes some tongue puns and says he’s going to take down Amasis. If he’s not down with that, he has two words for him: busted bronco.

Challenge of the Immortals
Amasis vs. Prakash Sabar

Amasis represents Battle Hive while Prakash Sabar represents The United Nations. Amasis grabs Sabar by his tongue to stop Sabar from showboating (he is wearing the “Sexiest Man” crown from National Pro Wrestling Day). Amasis slaps his hand, causing much damage to Sabar’s tongue. Amnasis has some gans grab onto Sabar’s tongue. Sabar demands that the referee make Amasis apologize. Amasis begins to oblige, then Sabar kicks him in the stomach and puts on a side headlock. Sabar shoulder blocks Amasis and takes him over with an armdrag. Amasis uses the ropes for an armdrag, as does Sabar. He drives his knees into Amasis’s chest and throws a series of kicks in the corner. He goes for a Bronco Buster. Amasis moves, but Sabar catches himself and jumps off the second rope into a DDT. He lands some lightning fast legdrops for a one count. Amasis throws a sole butt kick. Sabar catches him with a leg lariat for two. He drops Amasis with a reverse DDT. Amasis fights back from the mat and to their feet. Sabar throws some kicks to the shoulders and uses the ropes for a bulldog. Sabar throws Amasis outside. Instead of appeasing the crowd with a dive, he tosses Amasis back into the ring for a simple splash. They trade forearm strikes. Sabar throws a spin kick. Amasis sweeps his legs and lands a spinning enzuigiri. He drops Sabar with That Move I Beat Moses With. Sabar ducks the tornado kick. Sabar gives him a running boot to the side of the head. Sabar misses a Bronco Buster. Amasis hits a spinning enzuigiri. The 450 splash connects for the pin at 9:02. Sabar has GREATLY improved and it showed here. He and Amasis had a very good equitable contest with Sabar incorporating some new offense into his arsenal, all very smoothly. It gives me hope for his future, and Amasis is always great. **¾

Challenge of the Immortals
The Arcane Horde (UltraMantis Black, The Batiri (Obariyon & Kodama) & Oleg the Usurper) vs. The Gentleman’s Club (Chuck Taylor, Orange Cassidy, Drew Gulak & The Swamp Monster)

Mantis’ team represents The Arcane Horde while Taylor’s team represents The Gentleman’s Club. Oleg wants the Swamp Monster, so Gulak tags him in. However, Taylor tags himself in to the dismay of the crowd. Mantis also enters. Mantis wins a battle of shoulder blocks, sending Taylor to the floor. Kodama and Gulak go back and forth. Kodama turns an O’Conner Roll attempt from Gulak into a side headlock. They trade waistlocks. Gulak sends Kodama to the apron. Kodama slingshots back in with an armdrag and crossbody’s onto him for two. Gulak slams Kodama and poses. Obariyon makes a Killer Bees switch and takes Gulak over in a side headlock. Gulak switches into a headscissors. Obariyon shoulder blocks Gulak upon escaping and takes over Gulak with a Frankensteiner. Gulak headbutts him in the chest. Gulak puts Oleg in a waistlock. Oleg butts his way out. Gulak applies a side headlock. Oleg tosses him away and nails him with a boot. Gulak tags in Cassidy after the crowd tells him that they want the Swamp Monster. Cassidy ducks a boot and rolls up Oleg for two. Cassidy slowly crawls under Oleg’s legs and hits the ropes. Oleg shoulder blocks him down. Oleg picks up speed on the ropes and accidentally knocks off the Swamp Monster’s head! As he’s re-adjusting, Oleg continues hitting the ropes, allowing Cassidy to roll out of the ring. Kodama tags himself in. The Swamp Monster takes him down with a headscissors. Taylor then tags himself in and stomps Kodama down in the corner. Gulak gets in some shots before suplexing him for two. Obariyon blind tags in while Gulak has him in a side headlock. Kodama gives Gulak a Manhattan Drop and Obariyon follows up with a running knee to the face. Mantis Mongolian chops Gulak’s ribs and rakes his eyes on the ropes. Gulak blocks an Irish whip and bodyslams Mantis onto the ring ropes. The Gentleman’s Club wear down Mantis in their half of the ring for awhile. Mantis breaks a double clothesline, sending Cassidy and Monster into one another. Mantis hesitates, but ends up tagging in Oleg. He tosses Gulak to floor, gives Taylor a backbreaker, and splashes Cassidy against the ropes. Taylor breaks the pin and delivers Sole Food and a superkick. Kodama and Obariyon attack Taylor with a series of kicks in the corner. After breaking the pin, Gulak succombs to the Skull Bronzing. Cassidy roles under a double clothesline and spits water into the Batiri’s face! He double chokeslams them! Mantis kicks Cassidy in the stomach and hits the Cosmic Disaster. Monster breaks the cover and dropkicks Mantis to the floor. He looks to dive but Taylor cuts him off. He tries to dive but Cassidy stands in his way. Cassidy then lands a twisting Asai moonsault onto Oleg and Mantis! Obariyon attacks Taylor from behind. Taylor blasts him with the Brodie Knee. He uranage’s Obariyon into a top rope splash from Cassidy. Mantis makes the save. The Club look for a triple suplex on the Batiri and Mantis. The Swamp Monster tries to join but Taylor foolishly shoos him away. Oleg joins his team and successfully helps them triple suplex Taylor, Cassidy, and Gulak. Oleg and the Swamp Monster face off. Taylor rolls up Oleg from behind, scoring the win in 16:31. Everybody was on point with their wrestling and antics, making for a perfect package and a really good time. Orange Cassidy and the Batiri especially stood out, and Oleg being the weak link of the team is an interesting story to follow. This was a treat. ***¼

Challenge of the Immortals
Silver Ant vs. Jaka

Silver Ant represents the Nightmare Warriors while Jaka represents the Wrecking Crew. Jaka splashes Silver Ant from behind before the bell. They trade strikes in the corner. Silver Ant throws some chops and Jaka headbutts him in the stomach. Silver Ant ducks a clothesline and dropkicks Jaka to the ropes. He slams Jaka into a legdrop for one. Silver Ant twists up Jaka’s left wrist and headbutts his hand. He kicks away the arm and re-applies a wrist hold. Jaka headbutts him to the corner. He shoulder blocks Silver Ant in the corner before unloading a couple chops and another headbutt. Silver Ant catches a forthcoming charge with a tiger feint kick. Silver Ant misses a slingshot senton, but rolls through a suicide dives onto Jake on the floor. Jaka gets in some shots, but Silver Ant then applies a cross armbreaker on the ring apron. Jaka sends him face first into a ring post. In the ring, Jaka stomps him down in the corner and chokes him with his foot. Silver Ant gets in some kicks from the apron. Jaka cuts him off and comes off the ropes with a Muta elbow drop. Silver Ant maneuvers his way to the second rope. Jaka yanks him down, but in mid-air Silver Ant changes it to a DDT for two. Jaka cuts him off with a headbutt to the stomach and lands a Samoan Drop for two. Same goes for a clothesline. Silver Ant and Jaka fight on the ropes. Silver Ant knocks Jaka to the mat and comes off the top with a dropkick to the chest. He throws a couple forearms in the corner. Jaka splashes Silver Ant in the opposite corner. Silver Ant bicycle kicks him. Jaka strikes him in the face. Silver Ant spins him into a Blue Thunder Bomb for two. Jaka grabs a claw. He strikes Silver Ant before dropping him with the Jumanji Bomb for two. A strike battle ends an enzuigiri from Silver Ant. He misses a corner splash. Jaka throws him out of a release German suplex. A spin kick to the head only earns a two count. Jaka misses a diving headbutt. Silver Ant quickly heads up top and lands a frog splash. Jaka kicks out! Silver Ant immediately locks on the CHIKARA Special. Jaka taps out at 10:16. This was very hard hitting and competitive. Jaka continues to look good in singles competition and I hope he continues having these types of opportunities to shine. ***

Icarus says nobody was more surprised than him when Juan Francisco de Coronado took him to his limit last Summer. However, he doesn’t want Juan to think tonight will be any easier with the Grand Championship not on the line. He tells Juan to take him to his limit again; he will still come up short. In his mind, the Challenge of the Immortals belongs to him and Dasher’s Dugout.

Challenge of the Immortals
Icarus vs. Juan Francisco de Coronado

Icarus represents Dasher’s Dugout while Juan Francisco de Coronado represents The United Nations. Coronado stalls for awhile. Finally, they go to the mat where Icarus applies a headscissors and then an armbar. Coronado brings them to their feet. They break clean in the corner. Coronado tries a punch but Icarus catches his arm and throws some chops. Icarus suplexes him into a pin attempt for two. He grabs a hammerlock which Coronado uses the ropes to escape. Coronado tries to go up and over but Icarus catches him on his shoulders. Coronado slides off to the apron. Icarus enzuigiri’s Coronado to the floor. Coronado blocks a baseball slide and drives Icarus back first into the edge of the ring twice. Inside of the ring, Coronado works over Icarus’ back and chokes him on the ropes. Icarus fires up after a clothesline, so Coronado turns him inside out with a second one for a two count. Coronado takes him to the corner, but it backfires when Icarus turns things around and unleashes shotgun chops. He sets up for the Blu-Ray. Coronado counters, looking for the German suplex. Icarus fights it off and lands the Michinoku Driver for two. He goes for the Shiranui. Coronado counters into a TKO. He goes for the Tiger Driver. Icarus maneuvers out. He successfully lands the Shiranui for two. Coronado lands a tornado DDT for two. Icarus goes for the Blu-Ray again. Coronado once more slips out, and this time the German suplex successfully lands. He locks on the Coronado Clutch. Icarus almost has the ropes but Coronado pulls him away. He kicks his way out of it. Coronado charges. Icarus catches him successfully with the Blu-Ray. Coronado rolls to the floor to avoid a pin. Icarus brings him back in. Icarus grabs a waistlock. Coronado grabs Bryce so he can low blow Icarus. He German suplexes Icarus for the pin at 15:38. This totally lacked the fire that their Grand Championship match had. The wrestling was good and the story was sound, but the cheap finish and lack of energy worked against a match we know already has the potential to be very good. I leave this match feeling disappointed. **¾

The Colony (Fire Ant & Worker Ant) & N_R_G (Race Jaxon & Hype Rockwell) vs. Hallowicked, Frightmare, & The Devastation Corporation (Max Smashmaster & Blaster McMassive)

The Devastation Corporation attack and dispose of N_R_G. They then get into a strike exchange with the Colony. The Colony’s clotheslines do nothing. The Dev Corp try double clotheslines, but the Colony exchange and low bridge the top rope to send them out. Hallowicked and Frightmare attack and send the Colony outside. Rockwell throws a series of jabs to Hallowicked, ending with a bodyslam. He lands a senton splash. Jaxon does a senton off of his partner’s back. Rockwell catches Frightmare’s crossbody. He and Jaxon deliver a tandem flapjack. Jaxon superkicks him into Rockwell’s arms. Hallowicked saves his partner, but eats a dropkick from Jaxon and a discus forearm from Rockwell. Jaxon follows Hallowicked to the floor with a suicide dive. Frightmare cuts off Rockwell’s dive with a dropkick. He tope con hilo’s onto Jaxon. Worker Ant forearms Frightmare back outside. Fire Ant suicide dives onto him and Hallowicked. Smashmaster goes up top. Rockwell throws him off onto the Colony, Hallowicked, Frightmare, and Jaxon. McMassive caps things off with a massive tope con hilo onto everyone. In the ring, N_R_G attack the Dev Corp. This leads the Dev Corp to bring them outside where all eight men are now brawling. In the ring, McMassive misses a legdrop on Fire Ant. Fire Ant nails the Yahtzee Kick. Hallowicked and Fire Ant counter each others’ offense. Hallowicked nails a yakuza kick for two. The Rudo quartet beat down Fire Ant in their corner. Some evasions cause the Dev Corp to collide twice, allowing Fire Ant to tag in Worker Ant. He attacks the Dev Corp with forearm strikes. He slams McMassive into an elbow drop and gives Smashmaster a uranage. Hallowicked kicks Worker Ant and tosses him out. Jaxon high crossbody’s onto Hallowicked and lands an enzuigiri. He clotheslines Hallowicked through the ropes, then comes off the top with a dropkick. Frightmare lands a sole butt kick and spikes Jaxon with a crucifix driver. Rockwell breaks the pin. He spins Frightmare into a powerslam for two. Fire Ant kicks and knee strikes Hallowicked. Hallowicked goes for a yakuza kick. Fire Ant ducks and hits Burning Down the House. Worker Ant follows up with a Death Valley Driver for two. He calls for the CHIKARA Special. McMassive breaks it up. Hallowicked and Frightmare hit Worker Ant with an enzuigiri/yakuza kick combo. McMassive hits the Boss Man Slam. Smashmaster comes off the top with a Swanton. Worker Ant kicks out! Fire Ant comes in but McMassive disposes of him. N_R_G send the Dev Corp to the floor. Frightmare ducks Rockwell’s clothesline and gives him a neckbreaker. Frightmare misses Kneecolepsy. Jaxon superkicks Frightmare into the Hyperwheel from Rockwell. That gets them the win in 13:43. This was action packed. Everybody got the chance to look good and N_R_G gets a strong win heading into their tag title shot tomorrow night. A really strong way to end the show and the Wolverhampton double shot. ***¼

Challenge of the Immortals Leaderboard
The Wrecking Crew: 2 Points
The Arcane Horde: 2 Points
Dasher’s Dugout: 2 Points
The Nightmare Warriors: 2 Points
The United Nations: 2 Points
The Snake Pit: 1 Point
Battle Hive: 1 Point
The Gentleman’s Club: 1 Point
The BDK: 0 Points
Crown & Court: 0 Points

6.0

The final score: review Average

The 411

Like the first show, this was a really solid effort from top to bottom, with some matches exceeding expectations. The only issue with these shows is while the wrestling is good and a new environment getting tried and true CHIKARA shows, the lack of storyline progression is a bit of a letdown. Still, that did not take away from my overall enjoyment.