411’s WWE Heat Report 03.27.06

Hey guys and gals, I’m Scott, and this is 411’s WWE Heat Report.

As most of you know by now, my fellow Heat Reporter Jeff Small has rather unexpectedly left 411. For months I’ve been concerned that Small would get burned out writing both his Final Fantasy Heat Report and his Sunday Small-For-All News Report, and now it appears that I was right. The pressure just got to be too much for him. Obviously, what Jeff Small brought to 411 has taken its toll on him. On Sunday I took over Small’s position as Sunday News Reporter with the debut edition of the Sunday Slim-To-None News Report. In that report I mentioned that Small walked out on the site without giving notice or saying a word to anybody. In response, Small sent me an email and asked me to post it in my Heat Report this week. I guess he wants one last chance to share with the dozens of his fans all over the world what’s going through his head. I know he’s disappointed, maybe more so than anyone else, that he will no longer be writing the Final Fantasy Heat Report or the Sunday Small-For-All News Report, so I figured that the least I could do for him was grant him this final favor and post his email:

Over the last few months there’s been alot of talk of people having bad attitudes, and alot of that talk has revolved around 411. All I know today is that one thing that’s not going to revolve around 411 for a long time is going to be Jeff Small. I don’t know where I’m at right now. The schedule I took on over the last few months, I took on because I didn’t feel like I could say no. I wanted to do everything. I wanted to enjoy my life as a member of the 411 Staff. I wanted to play Fact or Fiction, and I wanted to participate in pay-per-view round tables, and I wanted to vote for Wrestler of the Week, and I got to do every bit of that. And if nothing else, I have all of that to take with me. I know right now we’re in the middle of a time where toughness is real big here at 411, and unfortunately all I’ve got right now for you is alot of sorrow, alot of tears, and alot of emotion. I don’t have any toughness for anybody. So I guess, you know, here you go, Slimmer. Take the columns. Take the Heat Report. Take the Sunday News Report. They’re yours now. Take good care of them.

I know that over the last several months I’ve lost alot of things, and one of them has been my smile. And I know it doesn’t mean a whole lot to everybody else, but it means alot to me. So I have to go back and fix myself, and take care of myself, and I have to go back, and I have to find my smile, because somewhere along the line I lost it. And I don’t care, really, I don’t care if it’s unpopular. I don’t care if people want to make fun of me because I’m an emotional guy. Writing for 411 is all I’ve ever wanted to do, and over the last few months I’ve got to do it. And whether you like me or not, I just want to tell you that these last few months have been the most wonderful months of my life, and if I never do get to do it again, it’ll be okay, because I got to live a few months as the writer of the #1 Heat Report on 411, and those were the single most greatest few months of my life. I have everybody here at 411 to thank, and it means alot to me, and I’m going to go home now, okay?

So, Small lost his smile, huh? That’s funny, I haven’t been able to stop smiling for days now. Hey, what can you say? Life is good here at 411.

Anyway, I think we have some wrestling to discuss. You’re probably aware that Heat recently became available exclusively on WWE.com, and I think that this report should reflect that change. The new video-on-demand nature of Heat allows me to screen each episode for you while still allowing you to watch all or part of the show after reading my report. I want this column to be a resource to help you decide which segments are worth watching and which segments are worth skipping. However, I also want to cover each segment in detail for those of you who do not have the time, the desire, or the ability to watch Heat yourself. I’m going to try and meet both of these goals by separating this column into a preview and a review. The preview will include the title of each segment, the tag line for each segment, the running time for each segment, and the non-spoiler bottom line on whether or not the segment is worth watching. The review will include a detailed description of all of the action in each segment. Okay kids, enough with the boring stuff. Let’s get to the wrestling.

The Preview

Segment 1: Playboy Match
Tag Line: WrestleMania XX: Torrie & Sable team up to take on Stacy & Miss Jackie in a Playboy Evening Gown Match.
Running Time: 7:54
Bottom Line: Ah, TNA at its finest. Wait, isn’t that Samoa Joe? Right, this is T and A at its finest. Anyway, the wrestling is, um, sub-par at best, but nobody is going to watch this match for the wrestling. Give it a watch and revel in the glory of some of out greatest long-lost Divas.

Segment 2: Hair vs. Title
Tag Line: WrestleMania XX: Molly challenges Victoria in a Hair vs. Title Match.
Running Time: 8:07
Bottom Line: These Divas are both fairly competent in the ring, but the action here was really slow. Skip it.

Segment 3: Mixed Tag
Tag Line: WrestleMania XIV: Sable & Marc Mero face off against Luna & Goldust.
Running Time: 8:16
Bottom Line: It’s certainly not a technical masterpiece, but it’s quite impressive to watch Mero, Goldust, and especially Luna work their asses off to make Sable took great. Give it a watch and give credit to three real pros who took one for the team and put over a Diva that had no right to ever get over.

Segment 4: Triple Threat
Tag Line: WrestleMania XIX: Trish vs. Jazz vs. Victoria in a Women’s Championship Match.
Running Time: 10:38
Bottom Line: Watch it. Please, watch it. 2002 was quite the possibly the strongest year in the history of the WWE Women’s Division, and this is one of the best women’s matches you’ll ever see. These three Divas are all on fire here, and it could be a long time before you see a match of this quality on Heat again. Watch it.

The Review

Segment 1: Playboy Match
(Torrie Wilson & Sable vs. Stacy Keibler and Miss Jackie in a Playboy Evening Gown Match from WrestleMania XX)

We start off with the new WWE: The Power is Back video followed by the Heat opening video. Todd Grisham welcomes us to Heat from the Heat studios.

Todd Grisham: “Hello, and welcome to this special edition of Heat. I’m Todd Grisham, and get ready folks, because we are going to take a look back at some of the great Diva moments from WrestleManias past. You know, they didn’t have to pull my leg too hard to host this show, right? Actually, I put in to host the hairiest wrestlers in WrestleMania history, but I got instead. But that’s neither here nor there. Let’s talk about WrestleMania 22 for a second, and one of the matches that I’m most looking forward to happens to be a Diva match. You know, the Playboy Pillow Fight between Torrie Wilson and Candice Michelle? Should be good stuff. And speaking of Torrie Wilson, she was involved in another Diva WrestleMania moment. It happened back at WrestleMania XX in New York City, Madison Square Garden, as Torrie Wilson teamed up with Sable to face off against Raw’s Stacy Keibler and Miss Jackie in an Evening Gown Match. Get ready, people, because clothes are droppin’.”

We move on to footage of Torrie Wilson & Sable vs. Stacy Keibler and Miss Jackie in a Playboy Evening Gown Match from WrestleMania XX. That’s right, it Team “We were in Playboy” vs. Team “Oh dear sweet Lord, my life really would be complete and I actually could die a happy man if they were in Playboy.” We begin with all four Divas already in the ring. Let’s play a quick game of “Where Are They Now?” Torrie is still with WWE and getting ready for her match with Candice Michelle at WrestleMania 22. We’re 1 for 1 so far. Sable is now married to Brock F’N Lesnar and, um, not so much on television any more. 1 for 2. Stacy is still technically under contract with WWE but staying as far away from this circus as possible. That’s 1 for 3. And Miss Jackie? She’s found the promised land of TNA, so we finish 1 for 4. WWE really needs to be more careful with their Divas. Anyway, Sable has a mic, and it looks like she’s got something on her mind. Maybe she’s concerned about the fact that her boyfriend is about to flush his career down the crapper and get shit upon in HISTORIC fashion by the fans at MSG.

Sable: “Now I know this is supposed to be an evening gown match, but quite frankly, I’m feeling a bit uncomfortable and a little restricted. So Torrie and I have decided that we would like to start this match with our gowns off. That is, of course, if it’s okay with all of you. Well in that case, let’s begin.”

Sign in the crowd: “Bring in Nova.” Who says WWE doesn’t listen to their fans. I bet that guy cries himself to sleep every night.

Sable asks the referee to unzip her dress. Sable slides out of her dress and poses for the crowd. Not to be outdone, Stacy has Jackie unzip her dress. Stacy wiggles out of here dress to the delight of the crowd. Torrie joins the party and quickly disrobes. Not to get too technical, but as far as I’m concerned, Torrie and Sable just lost the match. The object of the match was to strip your opponents down to their bras and panties, and that is exactly what’s happened to Torrie and Sable. Then again, I suppose you could make the case that the bell was never rung and the match never officially began, so it isn’t really possible for Torrie and Sable to have lost anything. At any rate, all eyes are now on Jackie, but Jackie simply removes her shoes and climbs out to the ring apron. Sable is none to pleased that Jackie doesn’t want to play her game, so she grabs Jackie and flips her over the top rope and back into the ring. All four women are in the ring and three of them are half naked, so the referee signals for the bell, and this match is officially underway.

Torrie and Sable grab Jackie’s dress and pull it off of her. Fascinating that Stacy offers no assistance to her partner here. Stacy and Torrie head to their respective corners, and it’s going to be Jackie and Sable to start things off. Jackie shoves Sable into the corner, but Sable grabs Jackie by the neck and throws her into the corner. Sable gives Jackie two kicks to the gut followed by a knee to the gut before dropping Jackie with a snap-mare takedown that sends Jackie to the middle of the ring. Torrie climbs to the top rope as Sable kicks Jackie in the back. Sable tags in Torrie, Jackie gets back to her feet, and Torrie comes off the top rope and connects with a flying cross-body to Jackie. Torrie covers Jackie but only gets a two count before Jackie kicks out.

Torrie drags Jackie to her feet, but Jackie fights back with a bitch slap to Torrie. Jackie stumbles over to her corner and tags in Stacy. Stacy SLOWLY climbs into the ring, much to the delight of the fans. Stacy seems to like the crowd’s response, so she SLOWLY climbs back out of the ring. Stacy finishes off about sixty percent of the crowd by SLOWLY climbing back into the ring. Torrie grabs Stacy and whips her to the ropes, but Stacy cartwheels and spins around to face Torrie. Torrie kicks Stacy in the gut and whips her to the corner. Torrie charges towards Stacy, but Stacy gets her legs up and wraps them around Torrie’s face. Stacy pushes Torrie back to the middle of the ring and then maintains here momentum by whipping Torrie to the corner. Stacy traps Torrie in the corner and chokes her again the top turnbuckle using those LONG legs. I’ll give you all a moment to savor that image.

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Okay, everybody good to go? Give me a second to wipe off my hands before I start typing again. Alright, let’s roll. Stacy whips Torrie to the ropes and drops her head to telegraph the back body drop, so Torrie comes off the ropes and hits a sunset flip. Torrie pins Stacy but only gets a two count before Stacy kicks out. Stacy and Torrie do a series of rolling crotch shot pins, but neither of them seems to be able to get the three count. Both Divas get back to their feet, but Stacy levels Torrie with a kick to the head. Stacy covers Torrie but only gets a two count before Torrie kicks out. Stacy makes the hot tag to Jackie, but as soon as Jackie climbs into the ring she’s met with a spear from Torrie. Jackie and Torrie roll around on the mat, and at one point the referee gets caught up in the action. Both Diva’s get back to their feet, but Jackie once again bitch slaps Torrie. Jackie sneaks up behind Torrie and goes for a roll-up pin, but Torrie rolls through and covers Jackie with a roll-up pin of her own. Torrie stays on top of Jackie and gets the three count. Torrie celebrates her victory by spanking Jackie on the ass and giving us a little peak at Jackie’s booty. Torrie’s music hits the referee raises her hand in victory. Sable climbs into the ring and also gets her hand raised in victory. Torrie and Sable embrace in a celebratory hug while Stacy berates Jackie for her poor performance. Jackie storms back up the ramp in disgust as Torrie and Sable continue to celebrate in the ring.

We finish up with a commercial for the “Big Time” WrestleMania 22 merchandise now on sale on WWEShop.com.

Match Result: Torrie defeats Jackie with a roll-up pin.
Match Length: 2:34
Best Spot: Torrie’s top rope flying cross-body pin

Segment 2: Hair vs. Title
(Victoria vs. Molly Holly in a Hair vs. Title Match for the WWE Women’s Championship from WrestleMania XX)

WrestleMania Diva Moment: Sunny escorts LOD 2000 to the ring at WrestleMania XIV in 1998. How sad is it that eight years later Hawk is actually in better shape than Animal or Sunny? I know, I know, that’s low, but it’s also true. Deal with it.

We’re back on Heat, and Todd Grisham once again greets us in the Heat studio.

Todd Grisham: “Now earlier we showed you that evening gown competition involving the Divas as WrestleMania XX, but guess what? That wasn’t the only Diva action that night at Madison Square Garden. No-o-o. There was a Hair Versus Title match. Now what exactly does that mean, you ask? Well please allow me to explain. Molly Holly wanted the Women’s Championship, but Victoria had it. So Molly Holly decided to put something on the line herself: her hair. So if Molly Holly wins she gets the women’s championship, but if she loses her head is shaved bald. What would happen? Take a look.”

We move on to footage of Victoria vs. Molly Holly in a Hair vs. Title Match for the WWE Women’s Championship from WrestleMania XX. We jump to the action already in progress and find that Molly has Victoria trapped in a neck vice. Holy crap, it’s an actual wrestling hold in a Divas match. Highly impressive. Victoria eventually fights back to her feet and breaks the hold with an elbow to Molly’s gut. Molly grabs Victoria by the hair and throws her back down to the mat. Molly tries to drop an elbow on Victoria, but Victoria just manages to roll out of the way. Molly attempts to drag Victoria back to her feet, but Victoria kicks Molly in the face. Victoria gets back to her feet and catches Molly with a double-leg take-down. Victoria flips over to cover Molly but only gets a two count before Molly kicks out.

Both Divas get back to their feet. Molly charges towards Victoria, but Victoria sends Molly down to the mat with a clothesline. Molly springs back to her feet but is immediately met with a second clothesline from Victoria. Molly gets back to her feet and Victoria goes for a third clothesline, but Molly is one step quicker and catches Victoria with a kick to the gut. Molly hits the ropes and charges towards Victoria, but Victoria connects with a power slam to Molly. Victoria covers Molly but only gets a two count before Molly kicks out.

Victoria gets back to her feet and tries to drag Molly back to her feet, but Molly uses her leverage to drop Victoria neck-first across the second rope. Molly gets to her feet and climbs to the top turnbuckle. Victoria regains her vertical base and punches Molly in the face to halt her momentum. Victoria climbs to the second rope and sets up Molly for a superplex, but Molly fights back with two punches to Victoria’s gut and a clubbing forearm shot to Victoria’s back. Molly grabs Victoria around the waist and leaps over her. Molly lands on her feet and drops to her knees as she powerbombs Victoria off the second turnbuckle and down to the mat. Molly hangs on to Victoria and covers her but only gets a two count before Victoria kicks out. Um, interesting spot there. I guess it was sort of a combination sunset flip / powerbomb that got dangerously close to turning into a Ganso Bomb.

Molly drags Victoria back to her feet and sets her up for the Widow’s Peak. Victoria slides down Molly’s back and transitions into a back-slide. Victoria has Molly pinned and gets the three count. Victoria’s music hits as the referee raises her hand in victory. Molly’s face is consumed in a look of terror as she realizes that her head is about to be shaved bald. Molly slides out of the ring and tries to jump the guard rail, but Victoria follows her out of the ring and prevents her escape. Molly catches Victoria with a back elbow shot that sends Victoria down to the floor. Molly charges up the ramp with Victoria in hot pursuit. Molly disappears backstage, but Victoria drags her back out from behind the curtain. Molly slams Victoria’s face onto the stage and drags her over to the barber shop set-up. How in the Blue Hell was Brutus Beefcake not involved in this angle? And why is no one getting super kicked through a plate glass window? Molly throws Victoria into the barber’s chair and grabs the clippers, but for some reason Molly can’t get the clippers to work. Victoria sprays hair spray in Molly’s face to blind her before bouncing her head off of the barber’s table. Victoria slings Molly into the barber’s chair and straps her in. Wow, that’s like the barber’s chair from hell. Victoria grabs the clippers, but unlike Molly she manages to get them working. Victoria begins to shave Molly’s head as Molly slowly begins to regain consciousness. Molly screams bloody murder as Victoria continues to shave her head. Seriously, talk about a team player. Molly really did rule all.

WrestleMania Big Time Moment: “Rowdy” Roddy Piper interviews Morton Downy Jr. in Piper’s Pit at WrestleMania V in 1989. Downy repeatedly blows smoke in Piper’s face, so Piper grabs a fire extinguisher from under one of the stools. Piper shoves Downy down to the mat and douses him with the fire extinguisher.

Match Result: Victoria defeats Molly Holly when she counters the Widow’s Peak into a back-slide pin.
Match Length: 2:36 shown
Best Spot: Molly’s top rope sunset flip / powerbomb combination

Segment 3: Mixed Tag
(Sable & Marc Mero vs. Luna & TAFKA Goldust in a Mixed Tag Team Match from WrestleMania XIV)

WrestleMania Diva Moment: Jenny McCarthy escorts Shawn Michaels to the ring at WrestleMania XI in 1995. Sid follows along behind like the stooge that he is. Not to be outdone, Pamela Anderson accompanies Big Daddy Cool Diesel to the ring. We’re supposed to believe that Diesel upstaged Michaels by scoring Anderson instead of McCarthy, but I’m not so sure about that. Seriously, it’s Jenny McCarthy. I’d give you all a minute to think about it, but I’m guessing we’re all still, um, “recovering” from that match with Stacy a couple of segments ago.

Anyway, we’re back on Heat and unfortunately Todd Grisham has yet to spontaneously combust.

Todd Grisham: “When you think about hot Divas, and I know you think about them all the time, Sable’s got to be right at the top of the list, right? I mean, one of the hottest Divas ever, Sable stepped into the WWE spotlight way back at WrestleMania XIV as she teamed up with Marc Mero to face off against The Artist Formerly Known As Goldust and his gal-pal, Luna. Take a look.”

Side Note: Sable isn’t even close to the top of the list in my world. In fact, just for fun, here is my list of the hottest WWE Divas of all time:

1. Trish Stratus
2. Stacy Keibler
3. Sunny
4. Maria
5. Melina

Agree? Disagree? Drop me an email and let me know what you think.

We move on to footage of Sable & Marc Mero vs. Luna & TAFKA Goldust in a Mixed Tag Team Match from WrestleMania XIV. We jump to the action already in progress and find Mero and Goldust both down in the ring. Goldust crawls to his corner and tags in Luna as Mero inches towards his corner and tags in Sable. Sable charges towards Luna and greets her with a double-leg takedown. Sable gives Luna six mounted punches to the face before choking Luna against the mat. By the way, the crowd is going ape shit for this stuff. Sable gives Luna two more punches to the face before dragging Luna to her feet and tossing her to the corner. Sable gives Luna two kicks to the gut and a kick to the face before dropping Luna with a snap-mare takedown that sends Luna all the way across the ring. Dude, we saw almost that exact sequence from Sable when she was facing Miss Jackie in the first segment of the show. Good to see that Sable progressed so much as a wrestler between 1998 and 20002. Anyway, Sable gives Goldust a forearm shot to the face that drops him down to the ring apron as Luna gets back to her feet. Sable clotheslines Luna over the top rope as the crowd loses their collective mind. Luna slides back into the ring and quickly tags in Goldust. Sable refuses to back down and punches Goldust right in the face. Goldust slides out of the ring and down to the arena floor to catch a breather. Sable tags in Mero, and Mero immediately drops down to the floor to pursue Goldust. Mero catches Goldust and whips him shoulder-first into the ring steps. Mero rolls Goldust back into the ring and climbs onto the ring apron. Mero slingshots himself over the top rope and goes for a splash, but Goldust gets his knees up and catches Mero right in the gut. Goldust turns his attention to Sable, and the referee has to restrain Sable in order to prevent her from climbing into the ring. Mero low-blows Goldust while the referee is focused on Sable. Mero lifts Goldust onto his shoulders and goes for the TKO, but Goldust counters the TKO into a DDT. Goldust covers Mero but only gets a two count before Mero kicks out.

Goldust drags Mero to his feet and tries to whip him to the ropes, but Mero puts on the brakes and instead whips Goldust to the ropes. Mero drops his head to telegraph the back body drop, so Goldust uses his own momentum to swing Mero around and whip him to the corner. Mero slams chest-first into the top turnbuckle and staggers backwards. Goldust literally kicks Mero’s ass and sets him up for the Curtain Call, but Mero flips over Goldust and lands on his feet. Goldust turns around and is met with a knee to the gut from Mero. Mero hits the ropes and drops Goldust with a running knee lift to the face. Mero climbs to the top turnbuckle as Goldust gets back to his feet. Mero comes off the top rope with a springboard moonsault and takes down Goldust. Mero covers Goldust but only gets the two count before Goldust kicks out.

Mero drags Goldust to his feet and whips him to the corner. Mero charges towards Goldust, but Goldust catches Mero with a back elbow shot to the face. Goldust climbs to the top turnbuckle as Mero gets back to his feet. Mero hits the ropes causing Goldust to lose his balance and crotch himself on the top turnbuckle. Mero punches Goldust in the face, climbs to the top turnbuckle, and sends Goldust all the way down to the mat with a top rope hurricanrana. Mero covers Goldust but only gets a two count before Goldust kicks out.

Mero hits the ropes, but Luna catches him with a kick to the ribs from the ring apron. Mero grabs Luna and contemplates punching her while Goldust charges towards him from behind. Mero slides out of the way and Goldust slams into Luna. The crowd is insanely hot for this shit. Luna falls off the ring apron and down to the arena floor as Mero catches Goldust with a school boy pin. Mero has Goldust pinned but only gets a two count before Goldust kicks out.

Both men get to their feet and Mero whips Goldust to the ropes. Goldust comes off the ropes and Mero catches him with the TKO. Mero covers Goldust but only gets a two count before Luna comes in and rakes Mero’s back to break the pin. Mero gets to his feet with Luna on his back and staggers towards his own corner. Sable makes the blind tag to Mero, rushes into the ring, and covers Goldust. Sable has Goldust covered but only gets a two count before Luna comes off the top rope with a splash that inadvertently connects with Goldust when Sable rolls out of the way. Sable gets back to her feet and hits the Sable Bomb on Luna. Sable covers Luna but only gets a two count before Luna kicks out. Both Divas get back to their feet and Luna pie-faces Sable. Luna muscles Sable to the ropes and pie faces her across the top rope. Luna chokes Sable across the second rope but finally breaks the hold at the referee’s behest. Sable is alarmingly over with these fans. Luna charges towards Sable and again drives her into the second rope. Luna once again charges towards Sable, but this Sable slides out of the way and Luna bounces off of the second rope. Both Divas get back to their feet and Luna traps Sable in the corner. Luna gives Sable two shoulder blocks to the gut and tries to whip Sable to the ropes, but Sable puts on the brakes. Sable lifts Luna onto her shoulders and hits the TKO. Sable covers Luna and gets the three count. Goldust tries to break the pin but is just a second too late. Sable’s music hits as the referee raises her hand in victory. Alot of credit should go to Mero, Goldust, and especially Luna for making Sable look like a million bucks in this match. Really impressive stuff from a performance / story telling point of view.

We finish up with a commercial for John Cena vs. Triple H for the WWE Championship at WrestleMania 22 on 04.02.06.

Match Result: Sable defeats Luna with the TKO.
Match Length: 5:43 shown
Best Spot: Mero’s top rope springboard moonsault

Segment 4: Triple Threat
(Trish Stratus vs. Jazz vs. Victoria in a Triple Threat Match for the WWE Women’s Championship from WrestleMania XIX)

WrestleMania Diva Moment: Jonathan Coachman discovers The Fabulous Moolah and Mae Young getting their freak on with “Mean” Gene Okerlund and Bobby “The Brain” Heenan at WrestleMania XX in 2002. Dear lord, Moolah and Mae do a disservice to the term “Diva.” On the other hand, Heenan manages to make the entire segment worth while through his unsuccessful attempts to fight off Mae. Heenan rocked hard and you know it.

Were back on Heat and evidently Todd Grisham still works here. Oh well, you win some, you lose some.

Todd Grisham: “Thanks for joining me, Todd Grisham, on this special edition of Heat as we take a look back at some of the more memorable Diva WrestleMania moments, and what would a show about Divas be without the beautiful Trish Stratus? The most successful women’s wrestler of all time? Six time Women’s Champion! And guess what? She was going for the Women’s Championship back at WrestleMania XIX. Safeco Field in Seattle, over fifty-four thousand fans watched a triple threat match for the title. It was Trish Stratus against Jazz against Victoria.”

We move on to footage of Trish Status vs. Jazz vs. Victoria in a Triple Threat Match for the WWE Women’s Championship from WrestleMania XIX. We begin with Trish making her way through the curtain and down the ramp. The ring is about a mile and half from the stage, so Trish has alot of time to soak up the love from the crowd. I’ve always loved the WrestleManias that were held in huge arenas like baseball and football stadiums. I think it gives WrestleMania that unique, big stage feel that only WrestleMania can truly capture. Anyway, we then jump ahead to find the action already in progress. I guess WWE doesn’t think we want to see Jazz or Victoria’s ring entrance. Okay, for once maybe they’re right, but I digress. Trish comes off the ropes and catches Jazz with a Lou Thesz press followed by five mounted punches. Both Divas get back to their feet and Trish lands two stiff forearm shots to Jazz’s face. Trish tries to whip Jazz to the corner, but Jazz puts on the brakes and instead whips Jazz to the corner. Jazz charges towards Trish, but Trish gets a boot up and plants it right in Jazz’s face. Trish climbs out to the ring apron and begins to climb to the top rope, but Victoria grabs Trish by the angle and yanks her down to the arena floor. Trish looks to have hit her head on the ring apron on the way down. Victoria punches Jazz in the face and slides into the ring. Victoria gets her hands on Jazz and tosses her between the ropes and down to the arena floor. Trish and Jazz get back to their feet on the outside and Trish lands two more forearm shots to Jazz’s face. Victoria climbs out of the ring, sneaks up on Trish from behind, and lands a forearm shot to the back of Trish’s head. Victoria kicks Trish in the back before rolling her back into the ring. Victoria climbs onto the ring apron and hits a swank flipping slingshot leg drop on Trish. Victoria covers Trish but only gets a two count before Jazz grabs her ankle and drags her out of the ring.

Jazz climbs into the ring and hits her own leaping leg drop on Trish. Jazz covers Trish but only gets a two count before Victoria slides back into the ring and drags Jazz off of Trish. Victoria and Jazz get back to their feet and stare at each other. Trish slowly starts to climb to her feet but is kicked back down to the mat by Jazz. Jazz drags Trish to her feet as she and Victoria apply a double inverted standing facelock to Trish. Jazz and Victoria lift Trish into their air and then drop her down into a double shoulder breaker. Jazz then turns on Victoria and connects with a punch to the face, a kick to the gut, and a chop to the chest. Jazz tries to whip Victoria to the ropes, but Victoria puts on the brakes and instead whips Jazz to the ropes. Jazz comes off the ropes and is caught with a power slam from Victoria. Victoria covers Jazz but only gets a two count before Jazz kicks out.

Victoria drags Jazz to her feet and lands two punches to the face. Victoria shoves Jazz into the corner and gives her three shoulder blocks to the gut. Victoria lands one more punch to Jazz face, and Jazz slumps down to the mat. Meanwhile, Trish has gotten back to her feet and has snuck up behind Victoria. Trish hits a Lung Blower on Victoria and rolls through to a Ma-Trish bridge roll-up pin on Victoria. Trish has Victoria covered but only gets a two count before Victoria kicks out.

Both Divas get back to their feet, but Victoria immediately levels Trish with a running clothesline. Victoria drags Trish back to her feet, muscles her to the ropes, and drops her with a bitch slap. Victoria whips Trish to the ropes and drops her head to telegraph the back body drop, so Trish puts on the brakes and kicks Victoria I the face. Trish follows up with a running clothesline that sends Victoria down to the mat. Trish brings Victoria back to her feet and lands three forearm shots to the face that back Victoria into the corner. Jazz grabs Trish from behind and throws her down to the mat. Jazz picks up Trish, lifts her onto her shoulder, and hits a sit-out power slam. Jazz covers Trish but only gets a two count before Trish gets a shoulder up.

Jazz and Victoria get into a shoving match that ends when Jazz muscles Victoria into the corner. Jazz chokes Victoria against the top turnbuckle and bitch slaps her across the face. Trish gets back to her feet and shoves Jazz into Victoria before orchestrating a meeting of the minds. Victoria stumbles backwards into the corner and Trish follows up with four stiff forearm shots to Victoria’s face. Trish turns and lands three forearm shots to Jazz’s face. Victoria grabs Trish from behind and holds her for Jazz. Jazz tries to kick Trish’s head, but Trish ducks and Jazz instead levels Victoria with a spin kick to the head. Trish catches Jazz with a school girl roll-up from behind but only gets a two count before Jazz kicks out. Both Diva’s get back to their feet and Trish climbs onto Jazz’s shoulders. Trish gets a Victory Roll on Jazz but only gets a two count before Jazz kicks out. Both Divas again get back to their feet, but Trish hits the Chick Kick on Jazz. Trish covers Jazz but only gets a two count before Victoria breaks up the pin.

Trish and Victoria get back to their feet and Victoria goes for a clothesline, but Trish ducks underneath Victoria’s arm. Victoria turns around and is met with two more forearm shots to the face from Trish. Trish whips Victoria to the ropes and charges towards her, but Victoria gets a knee up and plants it right in Trish’s face. Victoria climbs to the second rope but gives Trish enough time to get back to her feet and hit the Statisfier. Jazz now gets back to her feet but is immediately dropped by a running clothesline from Trish. Victoria gets back to her feet and is greeted by two forearm shots to the face and three chops to the chest from Trish. Trish spins around to give Jazz a forearm shot to the face before giving Victoria a kick to the gut that send Victoria between the ropes and down to the arena floor. Trish tries to kick Jazz, but Jazz catches Trish’s leg and sends her down to the mat with a modified standing leg sweep. Jazz locks Trish in a Single Leg Boston Crab, but Trish valiantly tries to crawl to the ropes. Jazz transitions from the Single Leg Boston Crab to an STF in order to halt Trish’s momentum. Victoria distracts the referee as her, um, well, flunkie Steven Richards comes into the ring and breaks Jazz’s hold on Trish. Richards tosses Jazz out of the ring and climbs out of the ring before the referee notices his interference. You know, Big Stevie Cool really does need to learn to be a better judge of character. I mean, at various points in his career his fallen under the spell of Raven and Victoria, and let’s face it, neither one of them has their boots laced all the way to the top, if you know what I mean.

Anyway, Victoria charges towards Trish as Jazz climbs back onto the ring apron. Trish grabs Victoria around the waist and used Victoria to knock Jazz down on the ring apron. Trish rolls up Victoria but only gets a two count before Victoria rolls through. Victoria then has Trish covered but only get a two count before Trish kicks out. Jazz comes back in the ring and levels Victoria with a running clothesline. Jazz drags Trish to her feet and lifts her into the Bitch Clamp (elevated double chicken wing). Jazz drops Trish onto her face but is then dropped to the mat herself by a kick to the head from Victoria. Victoria heads for the corner and climbs to the top turnbuckle. Victoria goes for the moonsault, Jazz rolls out of the way, and Victoria slams face-first down to the mat. Jazz charges towards Victoria, but Victoria back body drops Jazz over the top rope and down to the arena floor. Jazz lands on her feet, but Victoria levels her with a punch to the face from inside the ring. Richards grabs a chair and runs into the ring. Richards tries to his Trish over the head with the chair, but Trish ducks, so the chair bounces off the tope rope and hits Richards in the face. Richards stumbles back to his feet but Trish catches him with the Stratisfaction. Richards bounces out of the ring while Trish turns to face Victoria. Victoria kicks Trish in the gut and lifts her up for the Widow’s Peak, but Trish slides down and lands on her feet. Trish spins Victoria around, but Victoria again kicks Trish in the gut. Victoria hits the ropes and charges towards Trish, but Trish connects with the Chick Kick to Victoria. Trish’s music hits as the referee raises her hand in victory and rewards her with the WWE Women’s Championship belt.

We finish up back in the Heat studio with Todd Grisham.

Todd Grisham: “So Trish Stratus winning the Triple Threat Match, becoming a four time, four time Women’s Champion. And hey, Trish is going to have her hands full at WrestleMania 22 when she takes on the, uh, PSYCHO Mickie James. And I don’t need to remind you, do I? But I’m going to because I’m the host of a show here on WWE.com, that WrestleMania takes place LIVE, Sunday the second of April from Chicago, Illinois, exclusively on pay-per-view. But if you’re not quite ready yet for WrestleMania, you need something else to get you pumped up, well click on the WWE 24/7 link here on WWE.com and find out how you can witness a great, historic WrestleMania matches that will really get you ready for the big night, April 2nd. And hey, WWEShop.com, check out this new WrestleMania Retrospective Magazine. It’s got all kinds of great stats, and, and pictures, and, and pools, and sexiest Diva cat fights. I mean, you name it, it’s in this magazine. You can pick it up at WWEShop.com. Well hey, that does it for this special edition of Heat. I had a good time, and I know you did to, right? Anyway, thanks for watching. I’m Todd Grisham, and I’ll see you, RIGHT HERE, next week.”

Match Result: Trish Stratus defeats Victoria with the Chick Kick.
Match Length: 6:47 shown
Best Spot: Trish’s Lung Blower / Ma-Trish bridge roll-up combination

Okay kids, that’s it for this edition of Heat. Hope you had fun. Feel free to email me with any comments or suggestions. I’ll see you back here next weekend.