411’s WWE RAW Report 4.4.20

---

It is I, your Monday Night Messiah, and if this were normal times, I’d be prepping my bar for endless amounts of margaritas and booty short wearing shot girls. Ah, I miss regular America….

---

MVP is here, because why not. He takes us back to last week when Nia just went and did a Nia.

MVP invites Asuka out and speaks to her in Japanese and translates. Which is a nice change of pace. Shayna is next, then Nia.

MVP calls the MitB match the most unique one, and asks Nia if she has the skillset to make it from the first floor to the roof then to the top of a ladder to obtain the briefcase. Nia then asks if he hasn’t seen Nia dominate the last few weeks. She is relentless. This is all she needs. Asuka namedrops Kairi then goes in on Nia, calls her very rude and. Big booty…I think. MVP looks over at Shayna, who doesn’t seem too pleased with the amount of lint she has on her pants.

She then chooses not to speak, but in Latin. Then she…speaks, saying she does all her talking with her actions. Asuka stands, talks some shit, then her and Shayna turn to Nia and kick her out of her chair. MVP holds the women back, saying let’s not do this.

We switch gears to Apollo losing his opportunity last week.

Backstage, there is a series of last chance matches for Apollo’s spot. Lashley is shown backstage doing pushups while Lana cheers him on. Thankfully, we cannot hear her.

We come back to RAW, and it sounds like we’re getting a Gauntlet Match. Oh joy.

Match 1: Gauntlet Match
Bobby Lashley vs Titus O’Neil vs Akira Tozawa vs Shelton Benjaminvs Humberto Carrillo vs Angel Garza vs Austin Theory vs AJ Styles

Lockup to start, and Titus chops the shit outta Lashley, but Lashley don’t give a damn. He reverses, but Titus reverses again, chopping then hitting the gut. Whip and Lashley hits a spear for 1..2..3!!!

Titus O’Neil has been eliminated

Akira is out next, and yeah….

He rushes under Lashley, spinning kick to the head, dropkick off the top rope, SPEAR from Lashley.

Akira Tozawa has been eliminated

Shelton Benjamin!!! He hops to the top, gets clocked in the face, Lashley sends him into the post, but Shelton reverse, hits a blockbuster, gets kicked, right hand from Lashley. Lashle whips, Shelto holds onto the ropes, and Lashley flies over, Shelton with a high knee! He bounces over the top rope and chokes Lashley up. Lashley sends Shelton into the barricade. Back in the ring, Lashley goes for a spear, Shelton hops over it, Lashley shoots for another one, and hits this one.

Shelton Benjamin has been eliminated

Humberto Carrillo is out next

We are back from a break to see this super serious, not-at-all predictable Guantlet Match. Lashley toys with Carrillo a bit, allows himself to get kicked in the face, then eats a flying dropkick from the top rope. Carrillo with a moonsault and a cover for 1..2…NO!!! Humberto to the top. Lashley grabs him and flings him off the ropes. Clothesline into the corner. Boot to the face. Lashley beats down on Humberto in the corner, then shoves the ref. Ref admonishes him, saying he’ll DQ the dude. Then he DQ’s him.

Bobby Lashley has been eliminated

Lashley spears Humberto out of anger. Refs come flying out to try and get Lashley out of the ring.

Angel Garza is out next with lil miss Lina. Angel takes his time coming out, realizing he’s got the upperhand.

We are back, and Garza has Humberto locked up in the corner while commentary makes sure to inform us in at least, eight different ways, that these two guys are related. Garza removes the pants. It’s supper effective. Garza kicks the legs, loeg drops the legs, runs with a dropkick, cover for 1..2…NO!!!!

Backstage, Lashley is upset. This is vital information that was necessary for you.

Garza goes for a suplex, using the ropes to help, then kicks the face of Humberto. Humberto kicks out. Whip to Humberto, my feed freezes, but looks like Humberto hits a hurricanrana, cover for 1..2..NO!!! Another cover from Angel but Humberto kicks out AND has a foot on the rope. Moonsault from Garza into a pin for 1..2…NO!!! Garza lifts up for a Wing Clipper. Carrillo fights out. Garza with the double underhook, flip, Humberto rolls through, cover for 1..2…3!!!

Angel Garza has been eliminated

Austin Theory is out next.

Random ass AJ and Dairy Queen commercial comes on, so there’s some foreshadowing, if you’re into that.

Theory beats down on Humberto, talking some shit, and working on him frombehind. Humberto breaks the hold with an elbow. Fireman’s, but Humberto can’t get him up. Theory punches, goes for a suplex, Hubmerto escapes, spin kick to Humberto. Knee to Thoery, springboard but Theory hits a right hand to the face! Cover for 1..2…NO!!! Humberto to the corner. Theory with a superplex, but Humberto reerses or rolls him up and gets 1…2…..3!!!

Angel Garza has been eliminated

Back from the dead, AJ Styles is here.

We come back and AJ locks up behind, but Humberto pulls the leg, AJ kicks away, grabs the chest, drives some knees into Humberto. AJ stomps Humberto a few times. AJ with a back body drop. Cover for 1..2..NO!!! AJ drives an elbow into the bs of Humberto a few times. IN the corner, Humberto tries to kick up, but AJ drives an elbow into the knee, then dragon screws Humberto down. AJ drags Humberto to the middle of the ring and drops a knee to the leg. AJ works a submission on the leg, but Humberto crawls to the ropes. Humberto tries to fight out of the corner. AJ with a right hand. He grabs the leg and goes for another dragon screw, but Carrillo spins out and hits a DDT. AJ is able to stand, gets a pumphandle, drives an elbow to the ribs, turns it into a gutbuster.

AJ then locks the leg. CALF CRUSHER!!! AJ wins, and that’s the end of the match.

Winner: AJ STyles
Boring, predictable, and uninspired.
Match Quality: *
Personal Enjoyment: NR
Total Rating: ½*

After the match, AJ flings Humberto’s leg into the post a few times to cement the fact that he is a heel.

AJ grabs a mic, and says he is neither zombie nor ghost, and there is no Undertaker here to stop him. He got buried, so what. He gets it, understands it, but it doesn’t mean he lost anything. There are no rules in a Boneyard match. NO rules at all. That was then, this is now, and he has seized an opportunity. He is now in the Money in the Bank match. AJ says he’ll do anything to win this match, even if it means throwing Rey off the top of the headquarters. No one has seen what he’s seen or been what he’s been through.

Rollins is out next with Charley in the middle of the ring. He goes all que sera sera on us then says he has confidence in Buddy.

He says that Drew is not a leader, and it is Seth’s destiny to take us into the future. What she is asking is how he is preparing to meet his destiny. Drew will put up a hell of a fight, but he is willing to sacrifice himself for the greater good that is his destiny. Everyone thinks hes tying to take something away from Drew, but it’s not true. It’s not the case. Being a champion, and being a leader is more than just what they do in ithis ring. He represents entire generations and industry. Drew is not ready for the pain and suffering for all of that. He’s not trying to crush Drew’s dream, but he is trying to save him. This is absolute, and at Money in the Bank, his destiny will become a reality when he stands in the ring with his hand held high and the announcement rings true – that he is the new champion.

Backstage, Vink and Thorne are taping up their wrists. In comes in MVP with some words of encouragement. He says great moments are born of great opportunity. They say this is from Miracle and MVP says yes it is, that’s right, and it’s a miracle they have this match. Vink cuts generic promo 206 and MVP rubs his hands together.

Match 2: Cedric Alexander and Ricochet vs Brendan Vink and Shane Thorne
I miss like 20 seconds, but suffice to say that Cedric got tossed round at least twice. Tag to Ricochet and we get a double team resulting in a neckbreaker. Cover for 1..2..NO!!! Ricochet with a front face lock. Tag from Cedric. He comes in to give an uppercut to Thorne. Chop to the chest. Whip to the corner. Thorne lifts Cedric up and ovr .He kicks Vink away, but Thorne is there to send Cedric to the barricade. Thorne tries to attack Ricochet. Tag to Vink. Vink grabs Cedric and tosses him into the barricade. Tag to Thorne. Cedric gets a tag to Ricochet. High kick on the top, then a hurricanrana. Tag to Cedric who runs in, splashes, dropkick from Ricochet, tornado DDT from Cedric. Pin for 1..2.NO!! Vik stops it. He gets sent over the top rope. Cedric grabs Thorne. Thorne with a side headlock. Go behind. Elbow. Tag to Vink. He gets kneed in the face. Cedric tags in Ricochet. They go for the double timea, but Vink sends Cedric to the corner. Kick to the fae, Ricochet sends him into the ropes. Cannonball from Thorne to Cedric.

Superkick to Thorne from Ricochet. BIG BOOT from Vink to Ricochet. Cover for 1..2….3!!!!

Winners: Brendan Vink and Shane Thorne
They beat a team that no one really believes in to begin with, making this relatively unimportant.
Match Quality: **
Personal Enjoyment: *
Total Rating: *1/2

The Street Profits are in the ring now and want to give us a history lesson. This is where they met, where they became brothers, where The Street Profits were born. But ever since The Viking Raiders got signed, they’ve been “chasing” them, but tonight the chase ends, because The Street Profits want the smoke.

Match 3: The Street Profits vs The Viking Raiders
Erik and Ford to start. Ford getes all fancy but loses it quickly as Erik sends Dawkins off the apron. Ford hops over and flips away from Erik, then misses a right against Ivar. Erik clotheslines Ford down and Ivar boots Dawkins for no reason. He then hits a splash on the outside. Erik with a knee to the face of Ford. Tag to Ivar. Ivar is up, Powerbomb from Erik. Ibar launches himself with a splash. Cover for 1.2…NO!!!! Ivar eats a jawbreaker as Dawkins hop onto the apron. Ford goes for a tag, gets it, and in comes the big man. He hits some right and lefts in the corner. Erik in to distract, jab from Dawkins. Dropkick to Ivar. Tag and Ford is whipped into Ivar. Ivar escapes, hits a clothesline, tag to Erik, splash. Knees from Eri. He lifts Ivar up and drops his ass onto Ford. Cover for 1..2..NO!!! Back elbow from Erik. Tag to Ivar, who comes in and hits a knee to Ford. He clubs the back. Ivar with a snapmare. He drops a fist. Cover for 1..2.NO!!! Ivar works the arm, and scrapes the face. Ivar sends Ford int othe corner. Tag to Erik. Shoulder into Ford. Erik lifts for a suplex, Ford rolls through and gets a 1..2..NO!!!! Tag to Dawkins. Clothesline. Again. An Exploder from Dawkins. Spinning splash, bulldog, Erik rolls to the outside and pulls Dawkins out. Erik into the ring, hits the ropes, and right hand from Dawkins! He then tackles Ivar into the barricade.

We are back, and Dawkins eats a hard right hand. Tag to Ivar who comes in, sits on the chest of Dawkins, cartwheels, then clotheslines! Ivar with a bronco buster to Dawkins. Cover for 1..2..NO!!! Knee strike from Erik after a tag. He covers. 1…2..NO!! Gutwrench to Erik. Tag to Ivar. Tag to Ford. Right hand Another. Another. Kick to the ut. Ford with a kick. He hits a clothesline. Ivar till up. Another. Still up. Ford hits the ropes, ducks a clothesline, Enziguri! Ivar to a knee. Ford looks for a back suplex, but he can’t quite lift him. Reversal and Ivar lifts, Ford lands on his fet. Enziguri. Tag from Ford. Ouble back body drop. Montez lands on Ivar off the flip. Cover from Dawkins. Tag to Ford. Ivar with a springboard back elbow to both men. Tag to Erik. Erik in, grabs Ford. Drops him onto the knee. Gutbuster to Ford. He backs up into the corner. Tag rom Ivar. Ford flies off the soulders, kick to Ivar, right from Erik! Ford is liftin up, going for The Viking Experience, but Dawkins is here to spear Erik! Ford with a DDT to Ivar! Spinebuster from Dwkins. Frogsplash from Ford. Cover for 1..2..NO!!!! Erik runs in with a huge knee to the face! Erik drags Ivar over to the corner. Erik to the outside. Ford gets sent over the top rope. Tag form Erik.

Dawkins with a kick. Iar back in. The Viking Experience to Dawkins. Cover for 1…2….3!!!!

Winners: The Viking Raiders
Sure am glad I got to see that Carpool Karaoke, otherwise this would just be unbelievable.
Match Quality: **1/2
Personal Enjoyment: ***
Total Rating: **3/4

Charly is backstage with Drew, who wonders about Buddy’s name. He is a very confused young man, the type Seth preys upon. Those at the lowest point of their career. Murphy is talented, but if he is willing to be sacrificed for his Messiah, and said Messiah is willing to sacrifice him, then who is he to deny all the people a good old fashioned slaughtering.

Backstage, The Viking Raiders claim they are just the better team. They go in and out between Bud Light drinkers and Vikings.

Aleister Black steps out of the fog to tell AJ he’ll be wishing he was still buried six feet under.

Rey is here to talk about the MitB match this Sunday, and how important it is to him. He calls this the riskiest match of his career. He doesn’t know how many opportunities he has left, and it’s risky, but the risk is worth the reward.

Charlotte claims that she is the hardest working woman, ever, claiming she’s working double duty even though she hasn’t been on RAW in like 3 weeks. She brings up Io and how she said that a match with Charlotte is her dream match, and Charlotte gets to make that dream come true. She will make her bow down to the queen.

Liv Morgan is here to interrupt. She says hello to The Queen, and asks if she remembers her. Charlotte thinks, says Liv must want her attention, and to take the new Liv Morgan seriously.

Liv says wow, no, she doesn’t need that. She didn’t have a daddy to walk her to the front of the line of her career of choice. It’s ok, she doesn’t want Charlotte to worry. Sooner or later, she will be a champion, and if she’s gotta knockdown a couple backstabbers, or dethrone a self-entitlted queen, bless be.

Charlotte knows who she is. She is Ric Flair’s daughter, born with a silver spoon, and damned proud of it. It’s a shame, though, because she’s been hearing this shit for years. She thought Liv was going to tell her that she was her dream opponent. It’s the fact that her and Io want to compete, and both will bow down.

Liv says well then, gets a ref down, and wants to see what happens.

Match 4: Liv MORgan vs Charlotte Flair
Flair backs her into the corner with ease. She then wrestles her down, sends her away, and kips up. Another lockup, and Liv ducks under, side headlock, Charlotte drops her down, Liv steps on the leg from behind but Charlotte won’t release the hold. Liv shoves to the ropes, Charlotte with a shoulder tackle. She hits the ropes, Liv drops, Charlotte holds onto the ropes, then kicks Liv away. Charlotte clubs the back. She sends Liv into the corner, Liv with a boot to stop it. Elbow to Charlotte. Charlotte with a forearm. Morgan with a lotta rights. Kick to the corner and Charlotte hits the corner hard. Liv hits the ropes, Charlotte meets her in the middle, hurricanrana from Liv! Splash in the corner. Charlotte with a clothesline. Whip to the corner, Liv rolls out, hops up to the top, dropkick to Charlotte. Liv runs and gets arm dragged into the corner.

We return to Liv doin some real damage, stomping Charlotte’s head in and covering for 1..2.NO! Elbow from Charlotte. Liv hits the conrer, is setn to the apron, right elbow from Liv. Liv hangs her up. Liv slides in. charlotte drops some stomps. She shoves Liv a bit. Liv with a right. Jawbreaker. Liv with a springboard then sends Charlotte’s face into her knees. Liv goes for a hurricanrana, but Charlotte powerbombs her ass instead. 1..2..NO!! Charlotte gets Liv into the corner. Liv bounces off the ropes, Charlotte catches her. Boston Crab onto Liv. Live tries to crawl to the ropes. She gets em. Charlotte breaks it. Drop toe hold to Charlotte, and she hits the ropes with her face. Iv runs the corner, Charlotte catches her, drops her onto the knee, then into the buckle. Charlotte to the 2nd rope. Liv up, hits a right hand. Lic hops up and pulls Charlotte off the top onto knees!!! Cover for 1.2..NO!!!! Another cover for 1..2…NO!!!!

Liv goes for Oblivion, but Charlotte side steps. Lockup into the Figure Four, and the Eight. Liv taps.

Winner: Charlotte Flair
I like Liv’s effort, but she ain’t quite there yet.
Match Quality: **
Personal Enjoyment: ***
Total Rating: **1/2

Match 5: Drew McIntyre vs Buddy Murphy
Murphy starts with crawling out then back into the ring. Seth is watching at the top fo the ramp. Drew with a clothesline. Murphy heads back to the outside. Drew follows. Murphy looks for some advice, but Drew is there to Big Boot his ass down. Drew sends Murphy into the barricade then the apron then the barricade and apron again. Drew sends Murphy over the barricade to the floor. Drew with a chop to the chest. They are both still outside. Drew with an uppercut. He sends Murphy into the ring and stares down Seth. Murphy swings with a dropkick. He sends Drew into the barricade twice then Drew grabs him, but gets sent into the post. Murphy to the top rope. He flies off with a Meteora. Pin for 1. NO! Chop from Drew. Another chop. Whip is reversed but Drew goes for a right, misses, a left, misses, Murphy hits his own then a kick, and Glasgow Kiss outta nowhere. Murhpy to the top rope but gets sent off flyin into the barricade. Drew sends him back into the ring then gets to the 2n rope. Buddy stands, axe handle to the head. Kipup from Drew. Drew grabs Murphy and gets a Fireman’s. Drew to the top rope. He cradles the head. Murphy floats down, kicks Drew’s head into the buckle, then powerbombs Drew! Cover for 1.NO!!! Drew is angry now.

Murphy is up first. He mocks the countdown for the Claymore. Murphy counts. 3….2…1….DREW WITH A CLAYMORE! Pin for 1..2…3!!!

Winner: Drew McIntyre
Lol, nice ending.
Match Quality: **1/2
Personal Enjoyment: ***
Total Rating: **3/4

Seth looks to enter the ring. Drew begs him, says it would make his week and he’s impatient. Seth seethes. Drew drops to his knees. Seth hops off the apron and heads up the ramp.

Drew celebrates. He turns. SUPERKICK FROM SETH!

Seth shouts that this is not about Drew; it’s bigger than Drew or Seth. Seth turns towards the title. Seth goes for a stomp. McIntyre is up! GOOZLE! Glasgow kick! He goes for a Claymore, but Seth rolls out of the ring and bounces.

End Show