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Acero’s WWE Clash at the Castle Review 6.15.24
Image Credit: WWE
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Hey y’all! I wrote this! If you have some time in your day, take a listen and leave a comment!
P.S. I love you.
Kinda.
In true Euro fashion, I got an Irish Man drunk last night at my bar. He was from Belfast, and he had about eleven pints of Guinness, and his only tell was how pink he was after just one beer. All I was missing was a Scottish brute to join him.
We get a video package with Drew as the narrator.
We are startin hot and ready like Little Caesar’s with AJ v Cody!
WWE Undisputed Championship
I Quit Match
AJ Style (w/ An Elaborate Retirement Ruse) vs Cody Rhodes (w/ Unbreakable Human Spirit)
Cody with a quick uppercut! He then sends AJ into the second buckle. Cody corners AJ, hits a hard right to the face. Whip to the corner, AJ reverses, then runs into a powerslam. Cody hits the ropes, flies for a Disaster Kick, but AJ goes low with an inverted atomic drop! To the corner. AJ with a chop. Another chop. Cody with a left, another, another, shake, rattle, and elbow to the dome! Cody gives some love to pops, then hits the ropes and flies with a dropkick, sending AJ to the outside. The ref asks Aj if he quits, and AJ tells him yo bro chill, it’s been 2 mins. Cody lifts the apron and grabs a table! He sets it up outside, but AJ is up! Cody walks over to him and sends AJ into the steps.
Cody takes AJ into the crowd then beats him with rights all the way through it towards a concord or pavilion or whatever the fuck.
We then end up in some production area with a bunch of dudes in front of screens. One of them is playing Galaga.
They fight back towards the long walkway to the ring, and Cody beats AJ against some steel barricades by the crowd. AJ continues his walk towards the ring, but Cody hits the lower back. He sends AJ into the ring. Figure Four on AJ! AJ doesn’t quit. Cody releases the hold then goes for a delayed suplex, but AJ reverses, sending Cody outside. They spin mid air, so I ain’t even sure who got hurt more. Cody is up first. AJ grabs him! To the shoulders!~ DVD onto the table! AJ grabs Cody. BRAINBUSTAAAAAA ONTO THE ANNOUNCE TABLE!!! The ref asks if Cody quits, he says no, and AJ grabs the mic and clocks Cody with it. lol. Nice.
Cody does the blade job! Cole says it was his face bouncing off the bell table. AJ is happy at the sight of the blood. He rolls Cody into the ring. AJ enters. Cody punches the stomach as AJ poses, but AJ drops him with ease then stomps the back. AJ lifts Cody to the shoulders. Neckbreaker off the shoulders! The ref asks Cody and he says, “Absolutely Not.” Cody to the outside. AJ follows and slams Cody’s face onto the steps. The crowd starts a “Fuck You AJ” chant. AJ tries for a piledriver onto the steps, but Cody hits him with a back body drop. Cody back in the ring as the crowd sings. Right from Cody, Aj tries, but Cody blocks. Right again, another. He screams for massive effect. AJ with a right, left, Cody ducks one, hits the ropes. Disaster Kick! Cody grabs AJ, lifts him up, Locks the head, knee from AJ! Pele Kick! DDT! Cody does not quit, so AJ fish hooks his mouth from behind.
AJ grabs a chair as the crowd chants for tables. AJ locks the head of Cody in the chair, then hits a right hand. AJ drops a knee onto the chair. AJ goes under the ring again for some plunder. Grabs a kendo stick. He enters the ring, hard shot to the ribs. Another to the back. One for the leg. Another across the back. Another. He gets one to the arm. AJ holds Cody by the chin and says to say I Quit. Cody says “Hell No.” AJ rips the belt off of Cody and pulls his head back a bit then tosses it aside and locks in an STF. Cody is slowly fading. He’s out! AJ calls for the match! He yells at the ref that he is out! The ref explains the rules that he thought he was very clear about. AJ leaves the ring, grabs a bottle of water, and heads into the ring to wake Cody up, even though Cody is already awake. AJ sprinkles the water on Cody then leaves the ring for a black bag of stuffs. AJ says it’s not tacks, it’s something better! It’s handcuffs!
AJ handcuffs Cody. Cody struggles to stand. AJ then sees Cody’s mom in the crowd. He goes over to talk some shit. She slaps him once, twice, three times a lady. AJ grabs a chair, stares her down, then enters the ring and smacks Cody across the back. AJ to the apron. He’s looking for the forearm! He springboards! Cody has a chair! He sends it flying into AJ’s face, which causes him to fall back THROUGH A TABLE!!! Cody crawls to the keys of the cuffs and grabs it like he found the one ring to rule them all. AJ back in the ring. Cody clocks AJ across the face with one of the cuffs! He unlocks the other cuff. AJ is leeding. He goes for a splash. Misses as Cody side-steps! Cody with a throat thrust. FISH HOOK FROM CODY! Cody Cutter! Cross Rhodes! ANOTHER ONE! A third one onto a steel chair! The crowd sings for Cody as he grabs a chair. He tosses it aside and leaves the ring, kneeling on the apron. He then grabs the handcuffs and locks AJ up, then drags him to the second rope. Cody with the chair. He tells AJ to say it. He smacks AJ across the back, then chest, then chest, back, back, arm, beating him down. A final one to the leg. Aj is asked if he quits, and he says, “Screw you, Cody Rhodes?”
Cody grabs the steps and tosses them into the ring. Cody lifts the steps and holds them up high. AJ is shocked in the corner. He screams that he quits.
Winner: Cody Rhodes
I’m never really a big fan of the trope, as often times the quitter has only ever suffered things he has suffered many many times before, but ya gotta try and suspend belief. There were moments where I was a little cynical, as is the case when certain things are overbooked, but considering we’re dealing with the babyfaces of all babyfaces, it was par for the course.
Total Rating: ***3/4
Match Time: 27:46
Cody Rhodes, still with the steps held high above his head, and looks to his mother. She goes full Palpatine and smiles as she says do it. Cody slams them onto AJ.
Cody walks up the ramp to celebrate. He holds his title high. Behind him stands Solo Sikoa! He is mockingly applauding Cody! Cody turns and they have a stare down. From behind, Tonga Loa attacks! Here comes Tama Tonga! The beatdown starts, but ends early because here comes Randy Orton and Kevin Owens to even the odds and send The Bloodline to the back!
WWE Women’s Tag Team Championship Match
Alba Fyre and Isla Dawn vs Shayna Baszler and Zoey Stark vs Bianca Belair and Jade Cargill
Bianca, Shayna, and Isla to start. Bianca corners Shayna and mounts for some punches. She gets all ten then bounces back as Dawn enters the ring. She splashes Shayna, Bianca sends he rright back out, rolls up Shayna for 1..2.NO!!! Bainca to the 2nd rope, flies over Shayna, back suplex. She hits the ropes, springboard moonsault, cover for 1..2. NO!!! Dawn breaks it up. Bainca kicks her to the corner. Tag to Fyre. Tag to Jade and Zoey. Zoey and Alba double team Jade. Jade kicks Alba away, Zoey works the wrist lock, Alba gets one of her own, and they both bend Jade back nearly to a bridge, but Jade powers out, pushing forward and shooting the girls off. Double clothesline, right to Fyre. She tosses Dawn into the corner, splash to Zoey, splash to Fyre, to Zoey, big boot from Fyre, she heads up top, Jade clocks her and presses her above her head then gets’ a fireman.s Zoey launches herself, Jade catches her. She’s got both girls. Fallaway Slam/Samoan Drop! Tag to Bianca and they double team Fyre with a huge slam to the amt. In comes Dawn to get hit with a body slam. Bianca gets assisted into a splash to the back. In come Shayna and Zoey, they get kicked then Bianca and Jade catch thme by their heads. Double certical suplexes. Kip up! Jade and Bianca flex on em.
On the outside, the other four girls huddle. They run in and Shayna and Fyre double team Bianca then send her into the post. Zoey and Dawn attack Jade on the outside. Shayna attacks the back. Fyre with a uicdie dive into Jade. Double suplex from Zoey and Shayna. Fyre with a running double knees to Jade!
In the ring, Fyre hits a hip attack to Bianca. Running kick to Bianca. Fyre grabs Bianca. Shayna and Zoey chat, then Zoey attacks Fyre!!!! Shayna, the legal woman, sends Fyre into the corner, hits a high knee, tags Zoey in, then trips up Fyre. Zoey flips off the top rope onto Fyre. Clothesline to Belair sends her back off the apron. Tag to Shayna. Kick to Fyre. Shayna whips, reversed. Hits the ropes, ducks under, Zoey got the blind tag. Missile dropkick from Zoey. Gutwrench from Baszler, cover from Zoey gets 1..2..NO!!!! Tag to Shayna. Dawn back body drops Zoey, nearly dropping her on her head. Tag to Fyre. She runs in with a DDT to Zoey. She sends Baszler over the top rope. Fyre hits the corner, bounces off with a front flip onto both girls outside! She sends Shayna into the ring! Dropkick off the top. Cover for 1..2…NO!! Belair rolls in to stop the pin!
Fyre tag in Dawn. Shayna sends her into the corner. Zoey stops Fyre on th top rope. They fight until Shayna runs over to punch Fyre, then her and Zoey double team. Dawn is up and she powerbombs Shayna, but Shayna has Fyre in her clutches! Zoey on the top rope. Bianca jumps up and locks her head. SUperplex from Bianca! Tag to Jade! She comes in and just slams everyone down. Powerbomb to Fyre! Cover! 1..2.NO!!! Shayna in! The Clutch! Jade looks to tap! The ref didn’t see. Shayna from behind. Jade appears to tap, but I don’t think that’s what she is trying to do. Jade still struggles. She’s down on the mat. Bianca is on the top rope. 450 to Shayna!!!!! Stark flies, Bianca catches her and slams her down! She shoves Shyan into Jade, Jade his a sloppy kick.
Bianca locks the head, assisted DDT into a German! Cover but Dawn is there to hit Jade with a German! Dawn covers Shayna!! 1..2……3!!!!
Winners: Isla Dawn and Alba Fyre
Got real sloppy there near the end, with jade making some rookie mistakes – which is something she can learn from, but it did hurt the quality a bit. When she looked good, she looked GOOD, but she lost her footing a bit there near the end. The surprise win, while a great moment for the girls, still places those titles well beneath anything of real importance.
Total Rating: ***
Match Time: 12:19
WWE Intercontinental Championship Match
Chad Gable vs Sami Zayn
LOCKUPP!!!!!!!! They roll across the ropes into the corner and Sami breaks the hold. Another lockup, this time with Gable cornering Sami. They break. Sami works the wist, Gable escapes, side headlock. Into a takedown, leg scissors from Sami, kip up from Gable, leg scissors of his own, Sami rolls out, they get a stalemate. Gable with a side headlock. Sami shoots him to the ropes, they do some work, arm drag from Sami, another, Gable thwarts a third and gets an Ankle Lock, but Sami gets to the ropes. He stands, Gable with a chop! YOU SUCK chant. Gable loves it. He ducks under, side headlock again, to the roeps, Gable hops over, then gets sent outside by Sami. Sami hits the ropes, does his little back flip thing, then calls for Gable to get back into the ring. Sami heads outside, Gable slides inside. Sami is by Otis. Sami stares Otis down. The crowd gives him a big pop. Sami tells him to listen to the people. Sami looks to enter the ring, does so, then tries to lock fingers with Gable.
Gable with a hard slp to the face. Sami hits his own. Gable with another, misses, Sami hits one, deep side headlock take down, Gable rolls through, Ankle Lock!!!! Rope break! Gable kicks the rope! He sends Sami into the corner shoulder first. Gable drops a knee onto the left arm, and another, slams it down hard. Gable corners Sami, then pulls his arm around the top rope. Northern Lights! Bridge! 1.2…NO!!! Gable turns Sami to his belly then works the arm from behind. Sami tries to turn into the hold. He is able to escape, hits the corner, up top, flies with an elbow to the dome. Chop to Gable! Another! Another! He beats down with rights. Sami, favoring the let arm, whips, struggles to do so, leaps over Gable then hits a clothesline and sends him outside the hard way. Sami to the apron. He back kicks Gable. Springboard moonsault off the top rope! Sami shoots Gable back in. He heads up the steps, to the apron, to the top rope, Sami flies!!! DROPKICK FROM GABLE!!! COVER!! 1..2….NO!!! To the ropes! MICHINOKU DRIVER! Cover! 1…2…. NOO!!!! Gable with a powerbomb! FLYING HEADBUTT!!! COVER!!! 1…2….NO!!!! Gable locks up from behind. GERMAN! Another! Elbows from Sami! Switch! GERMAN FROM SAMI! ANOTHER! He goes for a third. Elbow from Gable. Switch! Sami with another. They go back and forth with Sami hitting a half and half! HOLY SHIT! Cover! 1.2…..NO!!! They go head to head on their knees. Right from Gable, from Sami, from Gable, from Sami. Gable with another, and another. Sami fights back, Gable hits aa flurry, Sami with rights ad lefts, then he locks the head, but Gable with a lightening quick Crossface!!!! Sami escapes! He gets his own crossface! Gable picks the ankle! He drags Sami to the center of the ring! Sami nearly taps, but reaches for the ropes instead. He gets a rollup! 1..2..NO!!!! Gable with some crossfaces to Sami, then he nods to Otis. Gable leaves the. Ring and grabs the IC Title. He turns to the ref, hands the title over to Maxxine, then gets back in the ring. He hangs Sami over the 2nd rope and chokes him up then looks to distract the ref.
Maxxine has the title, looks at Sami, is about to swing, but doesn’t. Gable looks on in disbelief. He shouts for Maxxine to get up on the apron. He is sick of her never listening. All this crap. Every time. Sami is up! He goes for the Helluva Kick!!!! Gable moves! Sami stops himself! He almost hits Maxxine!!! GABLE LOCKS UP BEHIND! CHAOS THEORY!!!!!!!!! Cover! 1..2…..NO!!!!!
Gable looks back over to Maxxine. He leaves the ring and gets in her face. He walks her towards the ramp, admonishing her until OTIS stands in between them two. Gable starts in on him. But Sami flies over the top rope with a seated senton, only for Gable to shove Otis into the move! MOONSAULT FROM GABLE ONTO BOTH SAMI AND OTIS! He sends Sami into the ring! Gable to the top rope! Moonsault! Sami moves! EXPLODER INTO THE CORNER! Sami tries for Helluva Kick, but slows down and Gable is able to leave the ring. Sami follows, grabs Galbe, and sends him into the table. Sami whips, reversed, Sami hops onto the barricade, thinking moonsault, but Gable picks the ankle. ANKLE LOCK OUTSIDE! Sami shoots Gable and he accidentally clips the back of the leg of Maxxine! OTIS IS FUMING!!! MAXXINE SCREAMS IN AGONY!
Gable hops back into the ring. Otis looks to the fallen Sami as Gable explains it was his fault. Otis looks to Sami, Gable distracts the ref. Otis raises his hand up high but Maxxine screams for him to stop. Gable looks on, Otis heads to Maxxine and lifts her up to take her to the back. He looks over to Gable as he yells, then walks away.
HELLUVA KICK OUTTA NOWHERE COVER! 1..2….3!!!!!!
Winner: Sami Zayn
I love Sami, and this match was so fucking good, but I don’t think I would have minded Gable winning. Still, that’s fantasy booking, and if I’m rating simply what I saw, this was great. Great action, good drama, and Gable is a fucking beast. Dude moves so fluidly. He don’t need to be the next Kurt Angle, because he’s a bad ass Chad Gable.
Total Rating: ****
Match Time: 22:12
Chad Gable is shown in the ring fuming as Sami makes his way up the ramp.
OOOOOOOOO I LOVE THAT! Gable is pissed. He bout to go full American Hero on that ass.
WWE Women’s Championship Match
Piper Niven vs Bayley
We start with some shoves, but Piper overpowers Bayley and sends her outside. Green is there to give her a slap. Bayley chases her but out comes Piper to put a finger in her face. Headbutt to Bayley. Piper sends Bayley into the ring. She climbs the apron then enters the ring and Bayley gets a waist lock, Piper shoots her off, flies for a splash, but Bayley moves! Right hand from Bayley, another, another, She hits another, stuffing Piper. Bayley hits the ropes, Green hlds the boot, Bayley stomps her fingers, Green hops to the apron, asks the ref if he has eyes, did he not see that? He pokes the ref’s face nd he forces her to leave ringside.
Rollup from Bayley! 1..2.NO!!! Dropkick to Piper! Body slam attempt by Piper, but Bahyley lands on the apron, shoulders to the gut, another, locks the head, Bayley spins for a neckbreaker but Piper hits some body shots then shoots Bayley off the apron. Piper to the apron. She flies with a cannonball!
Back in the ring, and Piper kicks, another, running senton to Bayley. Cover for 1..2.NO!!! Piper whips bayley into the corner, big splash. Whip again and a back elbow. Piper shoots Bayley into the corner, misses a splash as Bayley hops over the ropes. Headbutts galore to Piper. Piper sends Bayley into the top buckle. Piper grabs her off the apron and hits a suplex INTO the ring! Piper to the apron, Bayley hits her with a bunch of kicks until the ref hits 4. Piper draped over the second rope. Bayley drops an elbow onto her back! Back to the 2nd rope and nother elbow drop to the back! Bayley to the top rope! Rolling senton off the top rope! Piper is on her back! Bayley to the top rope! ELBOW DROP!!!!! COVER!!!! 1..2….NO!!! To the corner! STO OUT THE CORNER FROM PIPER! SENTON! CoVER! 1..2…NO!!!!!
Piper gets some love from the crowd. Piper to the top rope! BAYLEY IS UP! She meets her up top. Headbutt from Piper sends her back down. Piper turns, Bayley runs back up. BAYLEY TO BELLY!!!!!
A masked woman comes down! OMG IS THAT REKLUSA FROM LUCHA UNDERGROUND! Lol. I kid, it’s Green with a mask on! She distracts, Bayley runs out to attack her! Piper grabs Bayley back into the ring! PIPER DRIVER!!!! COVER! 1.2…..NO!!!!! Piper tries for a squash but Bayley got the knees up! Piper on the outside! Bayley runs….right into a hard slam!
Back in the ring, Piper goes for another senton, Bayley moves! She tries for Roseplant, Piper with a headbutt! Bayley swings onto the arms! CRUCIFIX PIN!!! She stacks Piper! 1..2….3!!!!
Winner: Bayley
They woke up a crowd that was running on fumes, and that’s way more than you could ask for from a match in their positon. Good on both women. Piper got a hometown showing, Bayley looked good, Green is just great, and we got a Reklusa sighting!
Total Rating: ***
Match Time: 18:33
We get a sick ass band playin “Scotland the Brave” before Drew comes out. How do I know that? Because a little square of information showed up on the screen.
The crowd is so loud that they drown out Priest’s music. Nice.
WWE World Heavyweight Championship
Drew McIntyre vs Damien Priest
Ding. Ding.
LOCKUP! Drew backs Priest into the corner then tosses Priest across the ring. He shoots Priest outside, then hits the ropes and flies over the top rope with a sick ass flip onto Priest! CHOP TO PRIEST! Drew shoots for a Belly to Belly but Priest shoots Drew into the ringpost. Into the ring, and Priest flies with a left hand. Priest with a big elbow attempt but Drew catches Priest and walks him to the center. HUGE chop! Right hand. Drew whips, Priest holds on, spins, hits a right hand, then the ropes and Drew hits a spine buster off the ropes! BRIDGE COVER! 1..2..NO!!!! Drew chops Priest. Right hand to the dome. Priest with a Flatliner! Drew with a chop. Priest with a knee. Drew tries for the Aftershock! Priest rolls outside! Drew follows and sends him into the Prime bottles! Chop to Priest! Priest in the ring. Drew on the apron. High kick from Priest. Priest flies over the top rope, but tangles himself up!!! It looks like an accident, but Drew takes advantage of the moment and beats down on Priest! Drew to the apron. Prieset is still tied up. Drew pulls Priest up and he stands on the apron. Big chop from Drew! He grabs the head and pulls Priest into the ring with a suplex. Cover for 1..2.NO!!! Priest with a big boot. HUGE Clothesline to Drew!!!! Priest shakes the leg off a bit. He drops the straps! Priest holds his hand up high, GOOZLE!!!!! Drew escapes, misses a right, sends Priest into the post!!! Double underhook! FUTURE SHOCK! COVER!!! 1..2……NO!!!! Priest with a big boot! He is limping, hurt badly. Priest gives the crowd the ol FU and climbs to the top rope. Drew is up, though, and climbs. He chops Priest! Meets him up top. Elevated punches. White Noise attempt but Priest slinks off! He goes for Razor’s Edge! HITS IT ON ONE LEG!!!! COVER!! 1.2….NO!!!!
Both men on their knees. Drew wants a slugfest. He gets it with back and forth boos and yays. Drew stands, pulls up Drew, right hand, Priest limps away, hit his own. Priest with a HUGE right! Drew hits his own. Priest with a right hand. Kick from Priest, another kick, another, Priest is hurtin. He spins but GLASGOW KISS FROM DREW!!! HIGH KICK FROM PRIEST! He spins and hits another SICK as Kick! Bad idea, but it looked good. Drew wants more, Priest spins, misses, neckbreaker. Both men down. KIP UP BY DREW!!! He shakes the ropes! Drew in the corner! Priest rolls out of the ring! Drew walks over to Priest, Priest walks him out, another headbutt! Drew with a CLAYMORE INTO THE TIMEKEEPERS AREA!!! Drew grabs Priest by the head and drags Priest to the ring. He shoots him in at the count of 5. Drew back in. To the corner. 3! 2! 1! CLAY—NO!!! GOOZLE!!! SOUTH OF HEAVEN! Cover! 1..2…..NO!!!!
Drew pulls himself up in the corner. Priest is already standing. Priest hobbles over to Drew in the corner and sits him up on the top rope. Big chop! Priest with another chop. Priest splits the legs, climbs up, Drew with a chop! Another! Headbutt sends Priest off the corner. HIH KICK FROM PREIST! He sells the leg! Ref asks fi he’s ok, and Priest shoves him away. Priest back up to the top. RANA TO DREW OFF THE TOP ROPE!!! Priest hobbles over to Drew. CLAYMORE FROM DREW!!! OMG!!! COVER! 1……..2……NO!!!!! Priest kicks out!!!
Drew hits a belly to belly over the head! Drew grabs Priest. He lifts up and chops Priest across the chest. Priest fight out of a clutch but Drew corners him, box of the ears! Drew goes behind, shoves Priest, and Priest runs into the ref! CLAY….NO! Powerbomb! GOOZLE!!! Drew escssapes, hits the ropes, CLAYMORE! NO REF! DREW COVERS! Crowd counts. Drew gets all the way to ten! A ref slides in! Counts! 1..2………NO!!!!!
THE REF IS FUCKING CM PUNK!!!!! He stops the count at 2!!! He stands up! Drew stands up! They go face to face! Drew corners Punk with a choke to MASSIVE CHEERS! LOW BLOW FROM PUNK!!! He shoves Drew away by the face! Punk leaves the ring. Drew cowers with his balls in his hand! The ref is awake! GOOZLE!!! South of Heaven! Cover! 1…2………3!!!!!!
Winner: Damien Priest
Holy shit these two deserve all the love!!! Special shout out to Priest who, whether he was hurt or not, was able to utilize a crazy mistake into and throughout the entire match. If he is hurt, he deserves so much credit, and this will have been a career defining moment. If he ends up being just a little bothered, then he still deserves the clout coming after all of this. Drew winning would have been AMAZING, and kudos to him for seeing more story here longterm instead of a very selfish but deserved hometown win. I, personally, would have had Drew still take it, but I love that I can just enjoy the product for what it is rather than try and make it about what I want.
Total Rating: ****
Match Time: 20:17
We get a recap of that awesome camera angle of a ref sliding in, being compeltey unable to see who it is, bite for the 2 count, then the slow reveal of CM Punk. Fucking awesome.
End Show
