Sambus’ AEW Collision Review 06.17.23

Hello Team 411! *Hands in the air*

Theo Sambus here, and I’m thrilled to be taking over live coverage for AEW Collision, starting next week. Thought I’d take the opportunity to introduce myself ahead of time with a review for Collision’s debut event.

A little about me, to give you a flavor of what to expect. I’ve been a huge AEW fan since day one, but to be honest I’m just a big wrestling nerd in general. What this means for you is that you can expect a certain level of positivity from my reviews and coverage – I’m always keen to focus on the positives. This is what we all love, after all, right? Healthy debate and conversation is always welcome, so I look forward to chatting to you all in the comments.

Going forward, I’ll normally try to keep the live coverage free of opinion, leaving that to the post-match analysis to keep things clear for those of you who just want the cold, hard facts.

More importantly, 411 is all about family (cue the Vin Diesel GIFs) so I’d love to hear from you guys about what YOU want to see from our live coverage here. As Excalibur reminds us on a weekly basis, you got to give the people what they want!

TL;DR: We all love wrestling so let’s have a good time! Onto the show…

 

Location: Chicago, IL

Arena: United Center

Commentators: Kevin Kelly, Nigel McGuinness

 

And here we go! Strong CM Punk chants to begin…and Cult of Personality hits!

CM Punk makes his long awaited return…and he is carrying a red duffle bag. He also has his shoes hanging round his neck? Punk calls for the microphone. This should be good.

He takes off the AEW sleeve! Punk is tired of being nice. Gone 10 months with a ruptured tricep, but he’s still here. This is the professional wrestling business, a business of grownups, not a popularity contest. Tonight we need a conversation about Punk’s past.

If you’d told Punk aged 15 that he’d sell out arenas across the world, he wouldn’t have believed you. Punk says “tell me when I’m telling lies.” Punk loves us because we love him. He never apologizes, never compromises, and he never could have done any of it without you, the people.

Punk’s mere presence makes people uncomfortable, because he is the truth, and the truth is painful. “Boo me, cheer me, love me, hate me, you all do it because you know I’m right.”

He’s the genuine article in a business of counterfeit Bucks. Shots fired! The King is back, baby. And Punk has things to get off his chest.

Punk wants to know, why he should change? To the people who think they’re owed an apology…sometimes it’s better to be the bigger man. Punk apoligizes that the only people softer than you are the wrestlers you like.

Punk held what’s in the bag above his head the last time he was here. It belongs to Punk until someone can pin or submit him. To the people who thought he’d leave his boots in the ring and walk away…until others can lace up those boots, he’s going nowhere.

Of note, Punk hasn’t opened the bag, but we presume it’s the original AEW World Championship.

 

Christian Cage’s music hits and he stands by as Luchasaurus makes his way to the ring for our opening contest.

Match One: TNT Championship – Luchasaurus vs Wardlow (c)

Lockup to start, and Wardlow fires off some shoulders. Big dropkick from the champion sends Luchasaurus to the outside. Wardlow stalks him on the outside, boot the gut, and now Wardlow is after Cage. Christian tries to escape under the ring, Wardlow in pursuit, but Luchasaurus intervenes. With the champion distracted, Cage grabs the leg, and Luchasaurus with a big boot to send Wardlow to the floor. Wardlow is sent into the steel steps and then returned to the ring as Lucha goes for the first cover. Just a one count.

Wardlow tries to make a comeback in the corner, but Luchasaurus whips him into the opposite buckle and fires off a thrust kick to stay firmly in control. Bodyslam to Wardlow gets another one count. Lucha begins choking him out on the canvas, and referee Rick Knox breaks it up. Hard clubbing blows from the challenger keep Wardlow on his knees, until a back suplex takes him to the canvas. Lucha is wringing the neck as we come back from commercial, but Wardlow gets to his feet with Luchasaurus on his shoulders! Electric Chair Drop and finally the champion gets a breather.

Clothestline from Wardlow, and shoulders into the midsection in the buckles. Wardlow with a spinebuster takes Luchasaurus down, and Wardlow ascends to the top rope…but Lucha grabs the ropes to make him lose balance. Goozle! Lucha hits the one arm chokeslam but it just gets a 2 count.

Another Goozle…but Wardlow powers out, and then bites the thumb. Bakc elbow from Lucha, and a headbutt from Wardlow, followed by a big time clothesline to take Luchasaurus off his feet.

Time for the Symphony of Destruction! One powerbomb hits…Cage is livid at ringside and grabs a chair. Wardlow is taking his time… But Lucha is up with a chokeslam!! Nice nearfall gets a 2 count.

Wardlow gets him on his shoulder and hits a powerslam, and heads to the top. Swanton bomb! Straps are down, and Cage gets up on the apron again. Wardlow is still a step ahead….but Cage hits Wardlow with a camera from ringside when the ref has his back turned, allowing Luchasaurus to capitalise with a clothesline from behind and get the pinfall at 10:49.

Your Winner by pinfall and NEW TNT Champion: Luchasaurus. (10:49)

Haha Christian Cage is the one celebrating with the title, nice touch.

Rating: **1/2 – A little slow, and some of the distraction moments from Cage were somewhat mistimed, but a title change is a good way to create some intrigue for newer viewers.

 

QT Marshall and PowerHouse Hobbs are interviewed backstage by Lexi. Hobbs will win the Owen Hart tournament, according to QT. Hobbs sees himself as the face of TNT. This is his redemption story.

 

Match Two: Buddy Matthews (w/ Julia Hart) vs Andrade El Idolo

Great reaction for Andrade, making his 2023 return. Welcome Back chants in full force. And we start off with a lockup, and shoulder blocks exchanged. Headlock takeover from Buddy, and the same from Andrade, they are going pace for pace. Leapfrog and Buddy tries to send Andrade to the outside, but Andrade is Tranquilo!

Andrade and Buddy battle on the apron, with Andrade getting the upper hand. Cartwheel into a moonsault from Andrade! They battle by the timekeepers table, and Andrade jumps to the barrier and fires off a hurracanrana, sending Buddy into the rail. Cover for 2 in the ring.

Andrade heads to the top but Buddy to the apron…grabs the arm and pulls Andrade shoulder first into the buckles as we go to PIP commercial.

Meteora from Buddy! 1, 2…kickout. Buddy may have injured his knee, and Andrade’s shoulder is hurting, so medical staff attend to both men in opposite corners. Both men want to continue, and now they tee off on each other, trading forearms. Matthews appears to get the upper hand, but his knee is hurting him.

To the floor, and Buddy sends Andrade shoulder first into the barrier again. Referee Aubrey Edwards begins the 10 count now that Matthews is back in the ring…and Andrade gets back in at 8.

Dragon screw from Andrade targets the knee, and again. And a third! Flying forearm from Andrade and now both men are down…but Andrade kip ups to get back in control. Goes for a Figure 4, booted off but hits a moonsault for 2.

DDT attempt from Andrade but Buddy sends him to the apron and hits a hanging DDT, which gets a 2 count. Buddy heads to the top but Andrade is right there, joining him on the second rope…Buddy goes for a sunset flip but his knee gives way on the landing. Cheeky Nandos kick! And again! And the knee gives way as Buddy tries for a powerbomb.

Andrade gets control with a backfist, but Buddy is back up with a step up kick, and Andrade barely gets the shoulder up before 3. Buddy twists him into a submission, but Andrade quickly gets back in control and locks in a figure four. Matthews is writhing in pain…and Andrade bridges into a Figure 8!! Buddy has no choice but to tap out at 13.05.

Your Winner by submission: Andrade El Idolo

Rating: ***1/2 – This is what we wanted! We knew these two would go all-out and they did not disappoint. Didn’t give away too much either, so another encounter down the line has plenty more to cover. And judging by the post-match, House of Black and Andrade are not done. Put Andrade against all of those guys, they’ll all be certified bangers.

Buddy shoves him away after ther match, but Andrade wants a handshake. The lights go out! When they return….Brody King and Aleister Black are behind him. Andrade is surrounded and gets taken out with a discus clothesline from King.

 

Short video package for Scorpio Sky. Sky has been watching and waiting for the perfect opportunity. The future and present of AEW, no one can beat him, he’s on another level.

Tony Nese is in the ring with Smart Mark Sterling. Nese says he’s a personal trainer, so he can’t sit in the back while the crowd is disgusting and full of trash. But he has good news, he will shut Collision down and instead we’ll all do group training. Nese instructs everyone to stand up. We’re starting with stretches!

MIRO IS HERE TO SAVE US!!!

Match Three: Miro vs Tony Nese (w/ Smart Mark Sterling)

Miro is in no mood to play…he stalks Nese but Nese hightails to the outside and does jumping jacks. Slap to the chest on Miro but Miro shrugs it off. Now a barrage of blows in the corner from Miro, before he stomps a mudhole in Nese.

Whips to the buckle, takes Nese down with a clothesline. Miro has Nese trapped in the ropes and goes for the 10 count chest slaps…but Nese interrupts at 9. Nese to the top rope, goes for a crossbody but Miro catches him, Fallaway slam in retaliation.

Miro backs up to the corner…Smart Mark with a distraction and Nese gets a spin kick…but Miro asks for more! Spinning sideslam takes Tony Nese out, and now Miro is back in the corner….and connects with the Bulgarian Thrust Kick. Game Over! He humbles Nese with the camel clutch, who taps in 3.23.

Your Winner by submission: Miro

Rating: N/R – Glorified squash, as expected, but Miro looks like a beast and he appears fired up for this next run. I’m expecting some good things.

 

Match Four: Willow Nightingale & Skye Blue vs The Outcasts (Toni Storm & Ruby Soho)

Skye Blue seems emotional as the hometown girl, and her mom is here in the front row. The Outcasts get the jump before the bell rings. Suplex on the outside from Storm to Skye Blue, this is breaking down already!

Skye’s mom with slaps to the Outcasts! Rana from Blue to Storm. And now Willow and Ruby start things off in the ring as the bell rings. Low crossbody from Willow gets 2. Soho gets an STO, and begins pounding on the face of Willow as we go to PIP.

Tag to Storm and the double team begins with double boots to the throat. Storm takes firm control with a rear chinlock, and then tags Ruby back in. Soho shouts into the camera that her and Willow used to be best friends, as she chokes her with the bottom rope. “We want Skye” chants from the crowd as Willow begins to fight back, but Soho keeps control. Storm utilises the ref distraction to throttle Willow on the ropes again.

Back from PIP, Willow gets a short-arm clothesline and finally makes the tag to Skye Blue as Toni Storm is tagged in as well. Headscissor takedown from Blue and a kneeling enziguiri is followed up with a kick from the apron, and Blue hits a crossbody off the top rope for a 2 count on the Women’s champion.

Storm with a heel trip gets Blue into a cloverleaf in the center of the ring…Blue is clawing to the ropes…and makes it! Jackknife gets 2 from Blue before she tags in Willow. Pumphandle slam and Willow pulls the straps down! But Soho gets in during the distraction. Blue is legal now and Storm gets a HARD hip attack in the corner, and now Toni has the spray can. Friendly fire on Soho as she gets sprayed in the face by accident! And Sky Blue gets the pin at 8:00 with a flipping rollup.

Your Winners by pinfall: Skye Blue and Willow Nightingale

Rating: **1/4 – Perfectly fine, and nice for a hometown hero not to get humiliated for once. AEW is pretty good with that, so it makes for a feel-good moment for the fans and the wrestlers themselves.

 

Ricky Starks declares for the Owen Hart Cup Tournament. Starks believes he will go all the way, and it will be an honour and privilege to represent Owen Hart in Canada.

The Last Outlaw Jeff Jarrett vs Mark Briscoe, Concession Stand Brawl is booked for this coming week on Dynamite. OK?

Tony Schiavone is in the ring, and he welcomes Daddy Ass and The Acclaimed. Yo, listen! I won’t do justice to Max’s rap, but his line that the Acclaimed “stole more hearts than Trump stole documents” is perfection. Ha! Tony says Daddy Ass looks marvelous, as he is wearing a sweet pink get-up with big scissors all over it. Billy says the Trios title is not out of the picture, they’re getting back on track.

Bowens says now AEW stands for Acclaimed Every Wednesday, and Acclaimed Every Weekend. They want to make history tonight with the first ever Collision Scissor! They gear up and deliver a four way scissor including Schiavone, gotta love it.

After some Forbidden Door hype, it’s time for the main event. Strap in, folks!

 

Match Five: Samoa Joe, Jay White & Juice Robinson vs CM Punk, Dax Harwood & Cash Wheeler

Jim Ross joins commentary for the main event, and he sounds hoarse as hell. Hope he’s OK!

Jay White and Dax Harwood appear to be starting this one off. Dax backs Jay into the corner and gives a clean break. Dax with a shoulder off the ropes and gets a quick nearfall, and Jay retaliates with a hard chop. More chops from Jay in the corner now, until Dax has had enough and flips the script, firing off chops of his own. Back body drop from Dax, followed by a couple of clotheslines in the corner. Stepover, Dax is going for a submission, but Jay escapes and heads to the outside.

Jay tags in Juice and capitalises on Dax’s momentary distraction…but Dax gets some FIERY chops. Wheeler tagged in now and a backslide from him gets 2. Back to their feet, body slam from Juice leads into a shoulder block before Cash reverses a press slam from Cash!

Punk is tagged in! Cash gets an assisted powerslam off the middle rope and Punk goes for the pin. He goes for the G2S but Juice crawls out of it and tags in Joe.

Punk vs Joe, all these years later! Chicago is feeling it, this is a great atmosphere.

Joe gets him in the buckles and my GOD what a chop…and another! Punk tries some chops of his own but no effect. He gets a headlock takedown on Joe but Joe is back to his feet. The side headlock takeover is applied again and this time Punk gets him to the canvas. Snapmare, chop to the back of the neck on Joe, and Punk hits a running knee to the face. Tag to Dax. Dax wrings the arm but Joe grabs the top rope and holds on. Dax gets a chop on Joe but that might have been a mistake as Joe gets one of his own. OOOOH BIG chop back from Dax! And Joe with a receipt, this is stiff as hell.

Joe with Kawada kicks to Dax but Dax gets more chops on him. Dax tries to get an advantage but Joe sends him back to the canvas easily. Jay White is tagged in and goes for a sneaky pin for 2.

Juice is in now, with a kravat on Dax, and the crowd are willing Harwood to his feet. Punch to the jaw of Dax almost knocks him out, and Samoa Joe is tagged back in. Joe with a flurry of jabs in the corner. Joe qith a quick tag to Jay, but Jay immediately tags Juice, who goes to the top for an axe-handle smash. Suplex attempt, Dax slips behind and gets a German suplex…and he makes the tag to Cash Wheeler.

Wheeler cleans house, uppercut to Juice in the corner, and a sweet rollup gets 2. Cash goes for the turnbuckle 10 count, and follows up with a high powerslam. Punk tagged in with an elbow drop off the second rope. Backbreaker on Juice, and Punk tags Cash back in. Pin attempt for 2.

Cash and Juice are battling on the outside now with chops by the ringpost…until Juice reverses and whips Wheeler into the barricade.

Joe is tagged in once they return to the ring, and Cash gets to his feet but Joe hits a back elbow to knock him back down. White in, and gets a single leg boston crab…but Cash gets the ropes. Juice tagged in, another bodyslam followed by a senton for a 2 count. Dax came in on that one but wasn’t need for the breakup as Cash kicked out.

Backdrop suplex from Juice for a 2 count, and goes back to the waistlock, transitioning into a hard whip into the buckles. Joe in now, more jabs to the midsection and a Pele kick, Punk comes in to break up the pin.

Jay White tagged in and goes for some chops in the corner before taking the legs out on Cash. Juice back in and Cash reverses a backdrop suplex…but still can’t get the tag….but he dives forward and gets the tag to Punk!

House of fire Punk with multiple body slams, followed by a twisting neckbreaker to both Jay and Juice. Bulldog lariat combination takes both men down! Signals for the Go 2 Sleep and goes for it on Jay but Jay rakes the eyes.

High kick from Punk while Jay is jaw-jacking, and Punk ascends to the top rope…but Juice Robinson pulls the rope to crotch him. Jay White with the uranagi! But only gets a 2.

Pepsi Twist on Jay White! Tag to Dax, who gets Jay on the top rope. Big time superplex, and Cash gets a splash, followed by an elbow drop from Punk. Juice breaks up the pinfall attempt.Tag to Samoa Joe who is in with Punk now. Throat jabs, and they trade blows. Jay White blindsides him and everyone is in, battling to the floor amongst all the chaos.

Joe and Punk remain alone in the ring, and Joe gets the sleeper hold. Punk is in the middle of the ring and drops to a knee. Jay White holds off Dax! Cash is held back as Punk is fading. Joe transitions into the Kokina Clutch….and Dax escapes from Jay to break up the submission attempt. That was a great close call.

Juice back in but immediately receives a Big Rig! Followed by the Go To Sleep from Punk to get the win for CMFTR at 24:43.

Your Winners by pinfall: CM Punk and FTR

Rating: ***1/2 – Solid trios match here, with a traditional feel and quite a slow pace for the large part. Lots of quick tags from the heel team, as you’d probably expect, but that did pull the pace down a little too much in the middle portion. Things really ramped up towards the end though, I genuinely almost bought the near submission with Punk in the Kokina Clutch.

 

CMFTR pose together on the ropes, and with that, we’re out! Solid debut show, and I’m very intrigued about next week considering it’s the go-home show for Forbidden Door. Tonight’s show was distinctly absent of Forbidden Door stories, at least in terms of anything booked right now, so it’ll be fun to see if we have any last minute additions, or if the show is used to start some post-Forbidden Door storylines.

Thanks so much for joining me, and I look forward to next week’s live coverage for Collision in Toronto! As always, hit me up in the comments for any feedback, or just to chat about the show. What did you think? Will you be tuning in next week? Until then, have a great week everybody!

7.0

The final score: review Good

The 411

The debut Collision show is in the books, and with two matches at ***1/2, that's a success in my book. I wouldn't say it was a complete homerun, but showcasing the 'forgotten' talents like Miro and Andrade made the show feel really fresh, and CM Punk showed up with his work boots on. Looks like Saturday nights are gonna be alright!