Csonka’s Impact Wrestling Review 9.06.19

Csonka’s Impact Wrestling Review 9.06.19

OFFICIAL RESULTS
– Jessicka Havok defeated Su Yung @ 6:05 via DQ [**½]
– Moose defeated Fallah Bahh @ 4:10 via pin [**¾]
– TJP defeated Golden Magic @ 10:10 via submission [***]
– RVD defeated Mad Man Fulton @ 6:25 via DQ [**¼]
– Titles vs. Careers: Champions The North defeated LAX @ 9:15 via pin [***¼]

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– Follow all of my reviews at this link.

– We open with highlights from last week.

Jessicka Havok vs. Su Yung: they brawl at the bell and Havok takes control with knee strike. She chokes her out and follows with a running kick and another. Havok slams her to the buckles and tosses her down. Ground and pound follows, and the leg drop misses. Yung follows with kicks, and a knee strike follows for 2. Havok fights off the mandible claw, hits the tree slam and follows with a crab. Yung makes the ropes and Havok then runs into a shotei and Yung head scissors her to the buckles and hits a ropewalk RANA. The mandible claw follows, Havok escapes and then gets dumped. Yung follows with an apron cannonball. Havok then cuts her off and slams her to the apron. Yung counters the inverted Alabama slam and mists Havok, leading to the DQ. Jessicka Havok defeated Su Yung @ 6:05 via DQ [**½] This was a solid first match for thee two and the feud will continue.

– Post match, Yung posts Havok and escapes.

– The North are backstage, and Page says they’ll be saying farewell to LAX forever tonight when they win. He wants to thank them for the opportunity to take away what they love the most. Alexander says they put their careers on the line time after time, and they’ve known they’re the best team in the world for years, and now everyone is starting to respect them. They will make sure everyone forgets LAX ever existed. Page says they can brag over losing the title four times, because the North will only have one reign that will last forever.

– Sami Callihan says he’s in a good mood since they are getting exactly what they need, and if they don’t, oVe are burning Impact to the ground. Cage is coming to the ring tonight to find out whether he is getting stripped of the title or will get his ass kicked, but before that, they’re going to watch Madman Fulton destroy Rob Van Dam, because they’re taking over everything.

Moose vs. Fallah Bahh: Bahh rushes Moose and attacks. He follows with strikes, tosses him around and the belly to belly follows. Moose fires back with chops, they trade and Bahh follows with a backdrop. Moose rakes the eyes and then follows with a run up high cross but Bahh Bahhs up and hits a clothesline. The running cross body follows for 2. Bahh then hits the banzai drop, but Moose kicks out. Moose now regroups and avoids the corner charge and hits the spear for the win. Moose defeated Fallah Bahh @ 4:10 via pin [**¾] This was pretty good and spirited while it lasted; thee two have a good chemistry that I didn’t ever expect.

– Post match, Moose locks on the ankle lock to further tease the Ken Shamrock feud.

– Tessa Blanchard storms into Tommy Dreamer’s locker room and says she’s sick of this. Dreamer says she needs to get her mind straight to get what she wants. Tessa says Sami and oVe are dead, and asks Tommy if he’s with her or not. Dreamer is with her, and she says she knew he would be.

Alisha is backstage telling Eddie Edwards that she would never cheat on him, and Eddie says he knows he gets carried away sometimes. An alleged Mexican hooker (I’m sure she has a great personality) arrives and tells Eddie last night was incredible and that he’s hardcore. Alisha slaps Eddie and says she hates him. Ace Austin comes arrives and says this is unbelievable, and Eddie is a real piece of shit.

TJP vs. Golden Magic: They lock up and TJP looks to ground things. They work into counters and TJP takes him down with a head scissors. Magic counters out and TJP kips out. they work into back and forth, Magic hits the lucha arm drag and stuns TJP off the ropes. Magic flies in with an arm drag and follows with a head scissors and moonsault to the floor. Post break and back in, TJP cuts him off into the tree of WHOA and follows with a dropkick. The senton atomico follows for 2. He grounds the action, and works a butterfly lock. He goes for covers but Magic keeps kicking out and then cradles him for 2. The disaster kick follows for 2. v cuts him off with a dropkick and follows with the rolling suplexes and heads up top. The swanton misses, cutter by Magic and follows with a tornillo that basically misses to the floor. Back in and Magic cradles him for 2. The step up high cross connects and then the spin out slam follows for 2. TJP counters back, and flubs whatever he was looking for and the brainbuster gets 2. TJP up top, cut off and magic hits the top rope RANA for 2. Magic back up top and misses the 450, TJP attacks the knee and they work up top. Magic hits the fall away moonsault slam for 2. magic up top and the 450 misses and TJP hits the det9onation kick and the heel hook finishes it. TJP defeated Golden Magic @ 10:10 via submission [***] This was good, but a bit uneven with a couple f obvious missed spots. Had they had a cleaner match, it would have been much better.

– Ace is paying off the hooker from earlier, then he acts like he’s turning down her advances when Alisha shows up. Ace says he can’t believe these people…

– Taya is backstage complaining to John E. Bravo and saying this should all be about her since she’s the longest reigning champion ever, but now Tenille is here, and all of Bravo’s ideas are garbage.

– Johnny Swinger is really coming in to Impact in the year of our lord 2019.

– Jimmy Jacobs is with Tenille Dashwood. Kiera Hogan and Madison Rayne arive. Kiera says Tenille can move to the back of the line and wait for her turn. Tenille says she’ll take on anyone, and will start with the two of them, setting up her vs. Madison likely for next week.

RVD vs. Mad Man Fulton: Dave Crist is at ringside. They lock up and work to the ropes. RVD escapes, follows with leg kicks and Fulton rushes him to the corner and follows with back elbows. RVD attacks again with leg kicks, but Fulton takes him to the corner and works him over. RVD dropkicks the knee, follows with strikes and a basement dropkick. RVD up top and the flying kick follows. Fulton powders, RVD follows and hits the apron cannonball to the floor. Back in and Fulton drags him back to the apron and follows with strikes. He slams him to the apron and back in, Fulton looks for a chokeslam and it connects. RVD fires back, but runs into a clothesline. RVD counters into a crucifix, follows with strikes and a spin kick. The flying back kick connects and he follows with rolling thunder. RVD heads up top but Dave shoves him off for the DQ. RVD defeated Mad Man Fulton @ 6:25 via DQ **¼] This was ok, but not a fan of running another DQ, It wasn’t bad, but watching these slow motion RVD matches is becoming tedious.

– Post match, Dave and Fulton attack RVD, who makes his own comeback and frog splashes Dave.

– The Rascalz are in the tree house and tensions rise and they start choking each other until Rich Swann and Willie Mack come in and get really high. They all decide to watch LAX vs. The North match together.

– Back to the Deaner farm, where the Desi Hit Squad are miserable, but Gama tells the boys he has a plan. Cody says they’ve been doing a great job and it’s time to head to the swimming pool. The pool is a lake so Gama gives Raju an Irish whip into the water.

– Jordynne Grace is trying to find her way around the building and bumps into Rosemary, and asks her if she remembers when she told her to stay out of her business and she did. Now Jordynne is coming down here to tell Rosemary to leave her alone and says she doesn’t need her help. Rosemary thanks her for clearing that up, but her decisions come from the shadow, and she does what it tells her, and she would not be playing with her if it was actually up to her.

– At the LAX clubhouse, Konnan says they’re at the point of no return. They’re not going to lose to those two hos, because they represent the Latino nation and that people look up to them, and they need to go back an inspiration. They’ve traveled the world and gone to jail together, and it’s time to prove why they’re the greatest of all time

Champions The North vs. LAX: Santana and Alexander begin. They lock up and work to the ropes. Santana grounds the action, but Alexander counters out until Santana hits a dropkick. Ortiz tags in and double teams follow; the cover gets 2. Ortiz works over Alexander in the corner, Santana tags in and takes out Page but Alexander fights back and then cuts off Ortiz. Page works him over Ortiz as Alexander stomps away at the bad knee of Santana. The champions follow with double teams, isolating Santana and keeping him grounded. Santana fires back, but Page quickly cuts him off as Alexander works over Santana on the apron. Santana tries to fire back, Page tags in and he lays the boots to him. They look for double teams but Santana counters out and tags in Ortiz. He runs wild and works over Alexander. He DDTs Page and powerbombs Alexander for 2. Alexander counters back and follows with ground and pound. The double Gotch follows for 2. The champions look for the street sweeper, but Santana makes the save and it breaks down. LAX runs wild and isolate Alexander after dumping Page, picking up the near fall. They continue to control, looking for the street sweeper, but Page cuts off Santana and double teas by the champions follow as the double team spinebuster finishes it. Champions The North defeated LAX @ 9:15 via pin [***¼] This was good but more abbreviated than I had anticipated. I also hoped that LAX woudl have sold the desperation of the stipulation more. It would have been awesome for LAX to go out in a great match, but was more important for the North to pick up a clean and decisive victory with LAX off to AEW. The North are now cemented as Impact’s top team after a strong run over the last 6-weeks or so.

– The North mock LAX, who then take their final Impact bow. Thank you good brothers.

– In our main event segment, Cage comes to the ring to address the fans. Cage has Melissa Santos with him and says that his whole life, he tried to picture what it would be like to be World Champion, and after working hard for 14 years, he became the World Champion. But he never imagined he’d be sidelined over and over as champion, and nobody’s more upset about that than he is. He’s had one title defense, but the doctor said he should be cleared within six weeks, just in time for Bound For Glory. He knows management has a decision to make, but he walked into the office and said the only way the title leaves him is if someone takes it, and when he whoops Sami Callihan’s butt as Bound For Glory, he’ll be defending it again. The positive that came out of all this is the time he got to spend at home with Melissa, and some things are more important than money and titles, and he’s thinking she’s right, because his title defense was only the second most important thing to happen tonight. Cage gets on one knee and proposes to Melissa, who says yes. They make out and celebrate.

– NEXT WEEK: Tessa & Tommy vs. Sami & Jake in a street fight, Ace Austin vs. Edie Edwards, Texano Jr vs. Dr. Wagner Jr., & Michael Elgin in action.

The 411 on Wrestling Podcast returns to the 411 Podcasting Network for episode 48. On the show, the good brother, Jeremy Lambert, joins 411’s Larry Csonka and the guys will breakdown & review NJPW Royal Quest 2019 Review, talk WWE’ s most underutilized talents, look at a list of possible suspects in the Chris Jericho belt theft case, and preview the ROH Global Wars Espectacular tour. The show is approximately 122-minutes long.

* Intro
* Most Underutilized WWE Talents: 3:45
* NJPW Fite TV Problems: 32:15
* NJPW Royal Quest 2019 Review: 38:45
* Chris Jericho Loses AEW Championship Belt (plus a list of the possible culprits): 1:05:45
* Bayley Turns Heel On Raw: 1:15:45
* ROH Global Wars Espectacular Dearborn Preview: 1:20:45
* ROH Global Wars Espectacular Chicago Preview: 1:33:05
* ROH Global Wars Espectacular Milwaukee Preview: 1:48:45

You can subscribe and listen to the 411 on Wrestling Podcast via the above player on Transistor, or on the following platforms:

* iTunes
* Spotify
* Stitcher
* Google Play

– End Scene.

– Thanks for reading.

6.8

The final score: review Average

The 411

This week’s episode of Impact Wrestling was pretty good and a nice rebound following last week’s weak effort. They gave LAX their send off, positioned the North well, set up matches for next week, and kept the main angles rolling along.