Dark Pegasus Video Review: King of the Ring 1996

King of the Ring 1996 by J.D. Dunn Here it is. “The Austin show.” This show is where the seeds of the WWE’s dominance were planted. June 23, 1996 Live from Milwaukee, Wisc. Your hosts are Vince McMahon, Jim Ross and Owen Hart. The Free-For-All features a silly comedy match between the New Rockers and the Bodydonnas. Along with dumping the voiceovers on their video packages, which I mentioned a few reviews ago, they’ve also since gotten rid of the cool knockoff of Mars: Bringer of War by Gustav Holst since this era. Too bad, because it’s way more dramatic that whatever neo-metal group name they pull out of a hat from Wind-Up Records. Opening Match, King of the Ring Semi-Finals: Steve Austin vs. Marc Mero (w/Sable). Austin beat Sparky Plugg and Savio Vega to get here. In fact, he debuted the Stone Cold Stunner in that match with Vega. Mero beat Owen Hart, which Owen complains about throughout this match in between making old-age jokes about Jake Roberts. Fantastic match here as Mero and Austin return to their technical roots. What’s great about these guys is they can go on the mat, or they can go up-tempo in the blink of an eye. Austin does so here by hitting the Thesz Press out of nowhere and nailing Mero with elbows to the head. He drapes Mero’s neck on the apron and hits an elbow to the throat, which Owen explains is perfectly legal because it sets up the Million Dollar Dream. It makes it that much funnier because it sounds like Owen is completely serious. Mero powers a Boston Crab over into a rollup for two. The Victory Star (flying leg rollup) gets two for Mero. Austin counters a sleeper to a jawbreaker and bites his own tongue. Mero tosses him to the floor and hits a somersault plancha. Back in, Mero hits a missile dropkick, but Austin is “tougher ‘n shoe leather” so he kicks out. A top rope huracanrana gets two. Austin recovers and hits an Alley Oop into a hot shot for two. That leads to the Stunner at 16:49. Good match that showed that Austin was the real deal in the ring. The fans got more into it as the match wore on too. ***3/4 Jake Roberts grumbles his way through a sermon. King of the Ring Semi-Finals: Jake Roberts vs. Vader (w/Jim Cornette). Jake beat Triple H and Bradshaw to get here, which is interesting considering their future career paths. This isn’t a match so much as a massacre. Vader knocks him down and hits a splash for two. Jake hits a fluke DDT, and Vader pushes the ref on the way down for the DQ at 3:29. Vader takes it out on Jake by breaking his ribs with the Vader Bomb. In retrospect, they probably should have had Vader win and then continue the beating until the ref reversed the decision. The DQ looked rather silly and convoluted. 1/2* Sunny whines about her various feuds with the other tag teams that she’s left behind, including the Godwinns and the Bodydonnas. Billy Gunn actually gets lost in the middle of his promo while staring at Sunny. Not that I blame him. It’s just kind of sad when bad things happen to good sentences. WWF Tag Team Titles: The Godwinns (w/Hillbilly Jim) vs. The Smoking Gunns (w/Sunny). Sunny had a cup of coffee with the Godwinns before the Gunns upset them for the titles. After that, she decided she kind of liked Billy. This was right around the time the tag division bottomed out. It’s a huge testament to Sunny’s talent that every team she left disappeared, broke up or had to turn heel to revitalize their careers. The Gunns control for a while until HOG gets the hot tag. The Godwinns work in the do-si-do, but Bart hits Phinneas with this boot for the win at 10:10. Owen and Bulldog would save the division a few months after this. Until then, it was all about hillbillies and cowboys. * Camp Cornette says Shawn Michaels won’t have an excuse this time. Special referee Mr. Perfect shows up in the background, arousing suspicion on whether or not he’ll screw Shawn out of the title. Jerry Lawler vs. The Ultimate Warrior. Lawler set Warrior’s Country Music Award on fire or something to set this up. The King takes a long time to get to the ring because he stops to insult all of the fans in the aisle. This is an awful match that might have gone over in 1985 in Memphis. Lawler tries every cheap heel tactic he knows, including strangling the Warrior. He hits his piledriver, but Warrior hulks up and finishes with the flying shoulderblock at 3:50. Warrior would start no-showing immediately after this, proving himself to be flakier than the shoulders of Mick Foley’s flannel shirt. 1/4* In the locker room, Gorilla Monsoon says he’ll allow Jake Roberts to compete because he doesn’t have that many more shots. The Undertaker (w/Paul Bearer) vs. Mankind. These two will probably be forever associated with one another, but this was their first big match. Taker appears behind Mankind when the lights come up, and IT’S ON! The Undertaker goes heel and gets a good bit of his edge back, which just gets him more over with the crowd. Taker backdrops Mankind on the outside, causing a bout of squealing from Mick. Back in, Taker hits Mankind with a chair behind the ref’s back, but Mankind locks in a nerve hold. They brawl on the outside, and Taker slumps against the ring steps, so Mankind runs halfway around the ring to build up momentum for a Cactus Knee. He tries the elbow off the apron, but Taker gets a chair up. Back in, Mankind tears his own hair out and steals the urn. Bearer steals it back before Mankind can use it, but Bearer tries to use it and “accidentally” hits Taker with it. Mankind finishes with the Mandible Claw at 18:19. They didn’t quite have their chemistry down yet because Taker hadn’t had to be creative in three years and Mankind had just gotten there, but that problem would be solved later in the year. ** Shawn Michaels warns Mr. Perfect to be impartial tonight. Intercontinental Title: Goldust (w/Marlena) vs. Ahmed Johnson. Ahmed got knocked out by Owen Hart’s cast on an episode of Raw, so Goldust provided mouth-to-mouth with a side of tongue. Ahmed destroys Goldust to start and hits an over-the-top suicida. He tries to kill Goldie with the ringsteps, but Goldust rolls out of the way. Back in, Ahmed takes a wussy bump over the top to the floor to turn things around for Goldust. Goldust kills time with a chinlock. Ahmed blocks a sunset flip, but Goldust stays on top and covers…vertically…with genitals touching. Ahmed kicks out and misses a dropkick. Ahmed eventually “loses consciousness,” so Goldust gives him more mouth-to-mouth. It was all a ruse, though, and Ahmed goes nuts on him. QUEERIN’ DON’T MAKE THE WORLD WORK, SON! Spinebuster. Pearl River Plunge. Ahmed wins his first and only title at 15:33. Goldust would be retooled as just “kind of weird” instead of “kind of weird homosexual rapist.” Goldust was good at getting heat, but the match was slow and boring. *1/4 Brian Pillman comes out to shoot on everyone without actually shooting on everyone. He threatens to rape, pillage and plunder the WWF. Cool moment as he walks back up the aisle as Austin is on his way down and they share a brief moment of recognition. King of the Ring Finals: Steve Austin vs. Jake Roberts. Jake’s ribs were severely injured by Vader during the semifinals, but he’s perseverant. Austin jumps him immediately and attacks the ribs. This goes on for a while until WWF President Gorilla Monsoon comes out and asks Jake if he wants to quit. Jake’s a trooper. Austin don’t like troopers. He finishes Jake with a Stone Cold Stunner to move on into history at 4:37. That time really belies how one-sided this match was. 1/4* After the match, Austin delivers the promo that made him a star: “The first thing I want to be done is to get that piece of crap out of my ring. Don’t just get him out of the ring, get him out of the WWF, because I proved, son, without a shadow of a doubt, that you ain’t got what it takes anymore! You sit there, and you thump your bible, and you say your prayers, and it didn’t get you anywhere. Talk about your Psalms, talk about John 3:16 – AUSTIN 3:16 SAYS I JUST WHIPPED YOUR ASS! All he’s gotta do is go buy him a cheap bottle of Thunderbird and try to get back some of that courage he had in his prime. As the king of the ring, I’m servin’ notice to every one of the ‘WWF superstars.’ I don’t give a damn what they are, they’re all on the list, and that’s Stone Cold’s list, and I’m fixin’ to start runnin’ through all of them. As far as this championship match is considered, son, I don’t give a damn if it’s Davey Boy Smith or Shawn Michaels. Steve Austin’s time has come, and when I get the shot, you’re lookin’ at the next WWF Champion, and that’s the bottom line because Stone Cold said so!” WWF Heavyweight Title: Shawn Michaels vs. The British Bulldog (w/Jim Cornette & Diana Hart-Smith). Mr. Perfect was hyped as the referee, but he takes a spot as the outside official because Gorilla doesn’t trust him. The whole Diana thing has been dropped in favor of Bulldog getting screwed at Beware of Dog. Shawn controls early, headscissoring Bulldog to the floor and hitting a rana from the apron to the floor. Back in, Bulldog controls with a side headlock. Shawn slips out of a press slam and goes to work on the arm. There’s some intrigue as Bulldog reverses and grabs a handful of ropes, and Perfect takes his time breaking it up. Shawn grabs a sleeper, but Bulldog backs him into the corner and whips him to the far side for a hard bump. Shawn comes back with a single-arm DDT and a double ax-handle. He goes back to the arm, but Bulldog presses him to the floor. Bulldog presses him back in for two. A Mexican Surfboard works Shawn’s back a little more, and Bulldog drops a leg for two. Shawn fights back and hits a crossbody for two. Shawn goes for a shoulderbreaker, but Bulldog reverses to a powerslam attempt. Shawn slips out of it, but Bulldog avoids Sweet Chin Music and levels him with a clothesline. A diving headbutt misses badly, but Bulldog hits a superplex for two. Shawn tries a rana, but Bulldog reverses to a powerbomb for two. Shawn reverses a whip this time, and Bulldog takes the Shawn “flip bump” in the corner. Shawn comes back with the usual, bumping the ref on the bodyslam. Shawn hits Sweet Chin Music, and both Hebner and Perfect count three, although Cornette pulls Perfect to the outside. Not sure what in the hell was supposed to happen, but I can guarantee you it wasn’t that. Shawn retains at 26:13, though. On par with their Beware of Dog match. ***1/4 After the match, Owen tries to sucker punch Shawn, but Shawn makes his own save. Bulldog and Owen get the best of Shawn until Ahmed Johnson makes the save. Vader turn the tide back to the heels, though, until Ultimate Warrior chases them off. This was supposed to set up a six man between all involved, but Warrior turned back into Bill Bixby and no-showed, forcing the WWF to turn back to **gulp** Sid. Camp Cornette gives a Coliseum exclusive interview, which is notable only for Owen getting in the goofy line “We’ve got a great cast” here, referring both to Camp Cornette and the cast on his hand. It was so bad I laughed for a good five minutes at just how bad it was.

The 411: Definitely a step up from last year. I think it's safe to say King Austin made more of a mark than King Mabel. Austin turned in two great performances – one in a great match and the other in an all-time great promo. That, coupled with the main event, earn this a recommendation, but the other stuff was horrible, so prepare to fast-forward a lot. Mildly recommended for wrestling. Solidly recommended for historical reasons.

Final Score:  7.0   [ Good ]