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June 21, 2021 | Posted by Tony Acero
WWE Raw

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Hello all. I have had one of the shittiest weeks in recent history, and here I am foolishly thinking RAW will fix it. Well, let’s do the damned thing…


It’s Monday…you know what that means.


We start RAW with the briefcases hanging above the ring. Tonight, there will be five qualifying matches.

We welcome our champion, Bobby Lashley. Make note that the Hell in a Cell cell is hanging over the ring, still.

THE VIP Lounge is in full effect as the ladies don Lashley and MVP. Lashley says that Drew at his best wasn’t good enough to beat The Almighty. Last night, MVP says, Lashley beat Drew within an inch of his life, but most importantly is Drew can never challenge Lashley for the title again.

MVP sees two alpha males in the ring, five gorgeous women, and one bottle of champagne – sounds like one hell of a party. I’ll have you know that one bottle of champagne for seven people total will not, a party, make.

MVP wants a toast, but New Day’s music cuts them off. Kofi and Woods come bearing gifts. It’s toast. They want to participate in the toast. They start throwing toast into the ring.

Woods says they always come prepared.

MVP says this proves his point. This clown nonsense is why Kofi was watching HIAC, instead of main eventing it. Kofi is a clown, and belongs in a circus. Once they get back in front of live crowds, Kofi will continue to do his little cosplay and play video games with his court jester, Woods, while they enjoy the finer things in life. Kofi says they are not going anywhere. It’s well documented that Kofi surrounds himself with people he trust, as opposed to users. He asks Lashley if these ladies will still come around after Kofi beats him for the title? Lashley says he will never lose the title, especially to someone like Kofi. Kofi lost this. There is a hierarchy in this world, and Lashley is at the top while Kofi and his friend are waaaay down here.

Kofi reminds Lashley that Kofi beat him in this very ring, and he has footage.
Kofi challenges Lashley for the title. Lashley accepts.

MVP says Kofi cheated, and that’s the only time he got the win. Lashley doesn’t want this to happen again. Lashley tries to sell MitB, but MVP corrects him, saying they want to fight tonight, but with Woods.

Woods tells the two of them that they are in the line of old-school mentality having, toxic masculinity having asshats who can’t hold a candle to Woods. Woods knows that they don’t see him as equal as Kofi and Big E, but he’s got some accolades. He is an 11-time WWE Tag Team Champion. Please, be quiet ladies, continue to underestimate him, because it will make this ass-whooping he puts on Lashley all the better.

But…the match tonight will be inside Hell in a Cell.


Match 1: AJ Styles vs Ricochet

AJ hammers away into the corner, then whips Ric into the corner. Aj up and over on the apron, misses a forearm and Ric hits a right, then a dropkick off the top rope. He hops ot the apron, goes for a moonsault off the post, rolls through, AJ grabs him and sends him into the post.Here comes the commercial.

WE ARE BACK and AJ has Ricochet in the corner. Whip to the center of the ring, Ricochet chops, hits another, whip is reversed, AJ with a back elbow to the face hard. Ricochet turns into a hold, hits the ropes again, hits a knee to the jaw. Runs, hits the ropes, fist to the face, back suplex but AJ lands on his feet and hits a right to the back of the head. Sends Ric to the ropes, who flies off with a crossbody. Ric in the corner. He rushes. The opposite, hits a hard clothesline, another whip. Ricocchet with a clothesline. He locks the head, Northern Lights into a roll through and a nice suplex. Cover for 1..2…NO!!!! Ricochet gets AJ on the shoulders, AJ elbows out, pele kick to the head. Torture Rack into a slam and a pin for 1..2…NO!!!! AJ tries for Styles Clash, Ricochet escapes, hits some elbows, attacks the back, misses a right, AJ with a flurry, back hand, Ricochet kicks, AN misses a Pele kick!!! GERMAN FROM RICOCHET!!! Pin for 1..2…NO!!!! Huge clothesline in the corner from Ric. AJ rolls through. CALF CRUSHER OUT OF THE CORNER!! Ricochet gets to the ropes. AJ stands above him, Ric stands, Firemans fom Aj int oa knee to the back of the head! AJ on the apron.

HERE COME THE VIKING RAIDERS! They attack Omos for some reason. OMos sends both of them flying and rages. He rushes, and tries to tackle them, but The Viking Raiders send Omos into and through the barricade. AJ goes for Phenomenal Forearm, but Ricochet with a RECOIL!!!!! Pin for 1…2….3!!!

Winner: Ricochet
The run-in was a bit trite, especially considering it goes against what little we know about The Viking Raiders, but giving Ricochet the win was a nice moment, even if it will amount to nothing outside of a cool spot come MitB.
Total Rating: ***
Match Time: 9:51

Backstage, Riddle talks to Orton about hiding his stash. They both have qualifiers tonight. Imagine? Two brothers fighting for a guaranteed shot at the title. That would be awesome. Right? Not for Riddle, says Orton.

BACKSTAGE, Kyle is welcoming Eva Marie back to RAW. She says it’s been 5 years since she’s stepped into the ring, and everything’s gotta be perfect. Last week, she caught a cold, but she knows the WWE Universe is dying to see the return, so instead of throwing in the towel, she arranged for her protégé to step into the ring. She is about to introduce herself as Piper, but Eve calls her Doudrop…


Match 2: Asuka and Naomi vs Eva Marie and Duodrop

I miss a bit of the beginning of te match and come back to Eva tagging herself in and getting a pin over Naomi for 1..2..NO!!!!

Naomi reaches for a tag, but Duodrop ain’t down. She drops down as Naomi rolls Eva Marie up for 1..2…3!!!

Winners: Asuka and Naomi

Total Rating: NR
Match Time: Who knows

Pearce and Deville are in the middle of the ring, and want to talk about Charlotte vs Rhea. They ask for both women to come out.

Rhea is out first, with her title.

She was told that she would be summoned. Apparently, what she did as champ was unacceptable. Rhea enters the ring. She wonders what they’re talking about. Sonya brings up how a title can change hand. Last night, she got intentionally disqualified.

Rhea says Charlotte has broken the same rules over and over again. She only did what Charlotte would have done. Pearce says she is not the current champion, and this brings Charlotte out.

Not yet, she says. Charlotte is not mad. She’s proud. Because last night, she was kicking Rhea’s ass and Rhea proved that she is smarter than she thought. Rhea is clever. She is still going to destroy Rhea.

Sonya says if this is asking for a rematch, then she’ll get one. It will be Rhea vs Charlotte at MitB.

-yawn-

So, backstage, we get the same shit. Nattie and Tamina are, apparently, doing a photo shoto, while Dana and Mandy are training in the ring. Jesus, I can’t even….


Match 3: Randy Orton vs John Morrison

Morrison backs Orton into the corner. Ref backs him up. Front face lock in the middle of the ring, and Morrison turns it into a side hold. Knee to the ribs. Clubbing of the back, and another knee to Orton. Another. High kick to Orton’s head. Cover for 1…….NO!!!! Morrison works the arm from behind. Orton turns into it, but Morrison drops an elbow to the back of the shouder, still working the arm. Morrison tugs on the arm, Orton with a thumb to the eye. He slams Morrison down to the mat. Orton with a whip, Morrison holds on, Orton sends him off the apron. Kick from Morrison. He tries to send Orton into the announce table, but Orton stops him, attacks the mid, sends Morrison onto the table a few times then sends Morrison onto the table with a back suplex. Morrison bounces off of it. Orton stalks Miz. Miz backs up on his wheels.

We are back, and Orton has Morrison hurting in the corner. Orton stomps the limbs one by one. Cover for 1…2..NO!!! Morrison with a kick, sends Orton into th post shoulder first. Orton rolls to the outside. Morrison follows, sends the arm into the steps hard. Morrison rolls him back into the ring,goes back to work on the arm. Orton tries to break it. An F9 commercial comes on, proving that Cena > Orton, still. Morrison slams the arm onto the mat. Morrison covers again. 1…2…NO!!! Orton in th corner, mounts and punches. Morrison kicks out the corner. Orton with the DDT, he stalks. Ready for the RKO.

The Miz with a water shot. Morrison with the rollup. Morrison with a hangman from the outside. Split legged moonsault. Cover. 1.2……3!!!!

Winner: John Morrison

Total Rating: **
Match Time: 12:50


Match 4: Alexa Bliss and Nikki Cross vs Nia Jax and Shayna Baszler

Nikki and Shayna lockup! Kick to the thigh. She sends Nikki into the corner. Roll out of the corner. Shayna covers for 1….2…NO!! Tag from Nia. Headbutt from Nia. Alexa goes over to the steps to hypnotize. Nikki flies off the top.

WE come back to bliss flipping onto Shayna. Shayna is up and sends Bliss away. Tag to Nia. Whip to the corner. Tag to Shayna, she runs with a knee to the face. Chinlock from behind. Bliss turns, right hand to the chin. Tag to Nia and Nikki. Shayna runs in, nearly hits Nia with a right hand. Bliss heads to the top rope. She stares at Reggie. She makes him raise his hand and nearly slap Nia.

Reggie breaks it, doesn’t hit Nia. Nia with a hug. Nikki kicks both of them. She rolls back in as Shayna is distracted. Cradle for Nikki. 1..2….3!!!

Winners: Nikki Cross and Alexa Bliss

Total Rating: *1/2
Match Time: 10:14

Jinder and Jeff and Cedric are wondering why they’re not in the MitB match. Jeff says he’s been beating Cedric over the last few weeks. Pearce and Sonya tell them that the qualifying matches are final. Sheamus says he’s the US champ, he shouldn’t have to qualify. Pearce says his nose is ok? So he can defend the title? Sheamus says no, he’s gotta go. They can talk later.

Jinder has a problem with who is currently in the match. He is sure Pearce has his reasons, but he has a question – if someone is somehow unable to make it into the match, Jinder would like to be considered as an alternate.


Match 5: Matt Riddle vs Drew McIntyre

Lockup! Into the corner. Ref breaks them up. Another lockup. Drew locks up against the ropes, Riddle gets a rope break. Chop to Drew, but Drew sends a Riddle down hard. Drew with right hands to the face. Drew covers for 1..…NO!!!! Chop from Riddle. Another. Another. Right hands. Drew sends Riddle into the corner. Beats him down hard. Drew grabs the head and locks the head. Front faced headlock in the middle of the mat. Deadlift suplex down hard. Cover for 1..2..NO!!! Drew sends Riddle into the post hard. Chop to Riddle. Drew locks the head, goes for another suplex, but Riddle stops it. Right hands, hits the ropes, tackle from Drew. Cover for 1..2…NO!!!! Drew with a short elbow, goes to the 2nd rope, Riddle trips him up and Drew falls hard on his back. Riddle with a Broton. Riddle drives some knees into the side of Drew. He gutwrenches DREW into a toss! Another gutwrenc! Deadlift! Drew stops him, and drops Riddle on the knee back first! Both men outside where Riddle sends Drew into the post then his an over head belly to belly!! Riddle heads into the ring.

WE come back and Riddle has a chinlock on Drew. Drew elbows out of it. He chops Riddle a few times, gets him on the shoulders, Riddle lands on his feet, hits a right hand in the corner, another running fist and a Exploder out of the corner! Riddle with a running kick to the back. Another Broton, but the knees are up! Riddle sells the pain as Drew tries to recover. Drew is up, belly to belly! Another! Neckbreaker to Riddle. Kip up! Drew locks the head, double underhook. Future Shock attempt but Riddle reverses with a pin for 1..2.NO!!! Drew up! HUGE Clothesline! Cover for 1..2..NO!!! Dre sends Riddle into the corner face first. He lifts Riddle onto the shoulders. Alabama Slam! Riddle is ded. Pin for 1..2…NO!!!! Drew to the top Riddle. Riddle already up there. Elbow out from Riddle, crotching Drew on the top rope. Riddle with elbows to the face of Drew. Drew with a Tree of Woe. Drew reaches up, RELEASE GERMAN TO RIDDLE!!!

HERE COMES ORTON! He’s out with his arm crossed. WE head to commercial.

BACK FROM BREAK and Drew has Riddle on his back on the 2nd rope, Riddle slide down and hits a powerbomb to Drew!!! Riddle with a knee! Cover for 1…2…NO!!!! Riddle locks the hips from behind. Drew breaks the hold, goes for a clothesline, blcoks a pele kick, lifts Riddle, Michinoku Driver!! Cover on Riddle for 1..2….N!O!!!! Drew to the top rope. He hops off the corner! Riddle catches him! TRIANGLE!!! He points for the win. Pin from Drew for 1..2..N!O!! Drew pulls him up, Riddle lands on his feet, backslide, shoulders down for 1..2.NO!!!! Drew with a Future Shock DDT! Cover for 1..2….NO!!!! Drew to the corner. He waits for the rise. Riddle collapses. Drew stands up, heads over to Riddle. Riddle on his feet, lifts and tries to slm Drew, but Drew counters, Riddle lands on his feet, locks the waist, ripchord, kick to Drew! Riddle up. Drew up. Riddle kicks the back of the head. He drags Drew to the corner. Riddle to the top rope. Moonsault, rolls through, Drew wants a Claymore, but BROMISSION COUNTER!!!!!!! Drew grabs the wrist. Breaks the hold. Turns into it.

Drew rolls Riddle forward, and Riddle with a running knee! Headbutt from Drew! Kick missed from Riddle, up to the shoulders, Riddle rolls forward! Pin. 1…..2…….3!!!!

Winner: Mat Riddle
Riddle just continues to put out banger after banger.
Total Rating: 22:53
Match Time: ****

Riddle meets Orton at the top of the ramp, wants some dap, but Orton aint having it. Riddle tells him not to leave him hanging. Riddle wonders what’s wrong. Riddle says he can talk to him. What’s wrong? He’s always here for Orton. Orton doesn’t budge.

Backstage, Stifler’s dad is doin Stifler things. In comes Mansoor, wondering what he is doing. Mansoor gets no explanation. Ryker tells him not to ever let his enemy escape. That’s his advice to Mansoor. When you learn who your enemy is, never let them escape. This is why next week, he’s facing Elias in a strap match.

IN comes Ali, telling Mansoor that he’s asking the wrong questions to all the wrong people. He needs to ask how the MitB spots were stolen from both of them. Here’s some advice; if Mansoor cant even get the opportunity to climb the ladder of success, then you have to build your own

We go back to Ryker, flogging himself.


Match 6: Hell in a Cell Match
Bobby Lashley vs Xavier Woods

Woods attacks the legs with some kicks. Lashley sends him into the corner for some shoulders. He locks the head, turns Woods. Neckbreaker! Cover for 1…..NO!!! He lifts Wood, Woods slides down the back and rolls up for 1…NO!!! Lashley with a clothesline. He grabs Woods and hits a Flatliner. Another to Woods. Lashley grabs Woods and hits yet another! Pin for 1..2..NO!!! Lashley sends Woods to the outside nd follows. Woods has a chair! He tries for a shot to the head, Lashley catches it, tosses it to Woods, then punches the chair into the face.

Back into the ring and Lashley runs right into the post, shoulder first. Woods dives through the ropes, kicking Lashley into the cage, another dropkick! Woods grabs a chair. Lashley hops up on the apron. Woods with a chairshot, sending him don. Woods smacks Lashley with the chair. Again. Another across the bck. Woods steps on the chin of Lashley.

We are back, and Lashley drops an elbow to the back of the head. Right hand to Woods. Another. Another. Woods shoves Lashley away, Lashley hits the ropes, flies, and topples to the outside. There is a table set up in the eing. Woods tries for a baseball slide, but Lashley grabs the apron and traps Woods in it, attacking with some right hands. Knee from Lashley. He sends Woods into the cage. Lashley lifts Woods in the ring in the corner. Back elbow to the face in the corner. Woods locks the leg, so Lashley stomps him. Lashley sends Woods into the ropes, Woods slides under Lashley, dives to clip his leg. Dropkick from Woods. Woods with a kendo stick! Attack to the back of Lashley. Again. Woods stabs Lashley in the neck with a kendo stick. Woods smacks Lashley across the back. Woods chokes Lashley up then sends him into the ring. Woods with a right hand, kicks the knee. Woods hits the ropes, wheelbarrow, slams to Lashley. Cover for 1…2…NO!!! Lashley sends woods to the apron. High kick to Lashley. Tornado DDT. Cover for 1..2…NO!!! Lashley kicks Woods in the gut, and goes for a powerbomb. Woods escapes, kick to the fce. Lashley on the table. Woods to the top rope. Elbow drop off the top rope!!! Cover 1..2…NO!!!!

Running kick is missed and Lashley sends Woods into a chair! Woods turns. SPEAR!!! Full Nelson! Woods Taps!

Winner: Bobby Lashley

Total Rating: ***
Match Time: 13:46

Lashley continues to attack Woods. MVP tells the ref to break the chains, and enters the cage! He locks it behind him. Full Nelson to Woods. He makes him fade as MVP watches and taunts Kofi, who is hitting the cage over and over.

End Show

article topics :

RAW, WWE, Tony Acero