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Kevin’s Random Reviews: WCW Fall Brawl 1993
Loading...WCW Fall Brawl 1993
September 19th, 1993 | Astro Arena in Houston, Texas | Attendance: 6,000
THE SHOCKMASTER! It’s the infamous one Pay-Per-View appearance of Fred Ottman’s Shockmaster character. After a legendarily botched debut, the Stormtrooper helmet wearing character was changed into a klutz, yet still penciled in for the War Games main event of this show. I’ve made my feelings known on how bad 1999 and 2000 WCW was, but 1993 is right up there in terms of poor quality. Though the name was used for Clash of the Champions in the past, this was the first Fall Brawl PPV.
The opening video hyped the major matches and had kind of a war theme. Tony Schiavone and Jesse Ventura were on commentary. In their opening, Ventura dubbed some of the fans “Tex-icans.”
WCW Television Championship: Ricky Steamboat [c] vs. Lord Steven Regal w/ Sir William
Steamboat came in with taped ribs, but didn’t let it stop him from coming out with a slew of chops. Commentary noted that this was more a brawl than expected, considering the skillset of these two. Regal repeatedly hit the injured ribs, Steamboat sold it like he was getting stabbed or something. It’s part of why he’s one of the best babyfaces ever. Even when he got offense in, he’d be too hurt to make the cover in time. They slowed the pace considerably, from mat work to Regal applying a hanging backbreaker rack. Due to Steamboat’s selling and Regal’s viciousness, something as simple as a surfboard looked absolutely barbaric. Regal removed the rib tape, adding to the damage of everything he did. Steamboat rallied and finally hit the flying cross body, but was too hurt to cover instantly. As he was sent over the top, Steamboat tried to skin the cat. He couldn’t due to the injury, so Sir William whacked him with his umbrella as he hung there. Regal won it with a German at 17:03. Very good choice for an opener. They worked a very smart match, utilizing great psychology and building the match around the injury. [***¼]
Eric Bischoff interviewed the Nasty Boys, who promised a big surprise for the Horsemen tonight.
Big Sky vs. Charlie Norris
Charlie Norris seemed to be the bigger name in the match, having an over the top Native American gimmick and commentary gushed over him. However, Big Sky was Tyler Mane, a man who went to portray Sabretooth in the first X-Men film and Michael Myers in the Rob Zombie Halloween flicks. The crowd gave no shits, chanting “We want Flair” and “Boring.” Norris worked a lame looking armbar for a while. Big Sky came back with some equally weak offense. Norris got the win with a bicycle kick to win in 4:34. In what world did that belong on PPV? Both guys were bad and the crowd didn’t care at all. I see why Sky became an actor instead of a wrestler. [DUD]
Scott Dunlop, an interview with cerebral palsy, interviewed Davey Boy Smith. Smith just said he was ready for War Games. As usual with him, it wasn’t a good promo.
2 Cold Scorpio and Marcus Bagwell vs. The Equalizer and Paul Orndorff
The Equalizer was Dave “Evad” Sullivan. A hyped Scorpio told the camera they wanted the belts. Bagwell and Scorpio got into trouble early, thanks to the size of the Equalizer. Unfortunately, none of Equalizer’s offense looked any good. Orndorff obviously performed better. He ate some tandem offense from the faces, but kicked out at one. Bagwell eventually got isolated. The heat segment allowed the fans to chant “Paula” and for Equalizer to use a rest hold in a tag. Scorpio got the hot tag and hit everything moving (though he whiffed on a dropkick to Orndorff). A pin got broken up, leading to a melee involving all four men. It led to Scorpio scoring with the 450 splash to win at 10:46. Some of the babyface offense was good and the finish was cool for 1993. The match just goes on for far too long. It dragged and was super boring. [*¼]
Eric Bischoff interviewed Lord Steven Regal about winning the TV Title. Regal said he and Sir William were heading to England to be congratulated by the Queen. When Bischoff brought up Regal cheating, he called himself a gentleman. If you can’t trust him, who can you trust?
Ice Train vs. Shanghai Pierce w/ Tex Slazenger
I will never not bump to Ice Train’s theme. For those wondering, Shanghai Pierce (who wore a mask) was portrayed by the future Henry Godwinn, and his manager Tex was played by the future Phineas Godwinn. This was about as basic as a match can get. Pierce got overpowered and had help from Tex tripping Train, though even that didn’t look right. Their next cheating attempt backfired and Train won with a powerslam in 3:27. Nothing match, that managed to be inoffensive. [¼*]
WCW World Tag Team Championship: Arn Anderson and Paul Roma [c] vs. The Nasty Boys w/ Missy Hyatt
The Nasty Boys’ surprise was Missy Hyatt. Apparently, WCW had already done their TV tapings with the Nasty Boys as champions AND with Missy Hyatt at their side, so the outcome was never in doubt. The challengers used a lot of punch/kick stuff in the early goings. It’s really all they had, to be honest. Fans spent a good chunk of the match chanting things like “take it off” and “crack whore” at Missy, while waving dollars at her. The match moved at a snail’s pace, with Roma taking a lengthy heat segment. He made the hot tag to Arn, only for a Missy Hyatt distraction to set up another long heat segment. Roma eventually got the tag and the Horsemen had it after an Arn spinebuster and Roma dive. The referee wasted time getting Arn out of the ring, allowing Saggs to nail him off the top and win the titles at an absurd 23:58. I’ll never understand why WCW insisted on booking the Nasty Boys in long matches. They sucked. This was possibly the worst. Arn wasn’t awful, but nowhere near his best, while everyone else performed like shit. An atrocious match that had no business going nearly 25 minutes. [-*½]
Bounty Match: Cactus Jack vs. Yoshi Kwan w/ Harley Race
If Kwan is Harley’s bounty hunter, does that make him his Boba Fett? This was Cactus’ return from an angle where he got took a powerbomb on the floor, which caused him to get amnesia and led him to live in Cleveland with seemingly homeless people. Mick Foley wanted the injury angle to be serious and build sympathy, but WCW went the comedy route. Kwan is also played by an American, with horribly painted on eyebrows. It’s awful. They did a lot of brawling and most of it looked as goofy as Kwan himself. Race’s attempt at distracting led to him getting hit on the apron. Cactus then won with the double arm DDT in 3:38. At least it was short. Cactus would have a much better match the next month against Vader. [¾*]
WCW International World Heavyweight Championship: Ric Flair [c] w/ Fifi vs. Rick Rude
Rude had Fifi on his tights. In the opening minutes, Flair locked on the Figure Four to a pop. Rude sold it well before making it to the ropes. With Flair nursing a bad neck after taking a Rude Awakening during a recent Flair for the Gold segment, I expected Rude to target that. Considering Flair just applied the Figure Four, it made no sense that he spent the next long chunk of the match working Rude’s arm. Why? Ventura tried making up for it by saying Rude’s arms are the strongest part of his body, but that would only work for me if Rude had shown that power early on. Rude sold it by failing to lift Flair for a slam, but then forgot about it. Rude turned it around and focused on Flair’s back. Again, it’s a usual target for him, yet Flair came in with a neck issue. Tons of rest holds, only made slightly entertaining by Ventura going on a misogynistic rant and having a female production worker shut off his mic. Eventually, Flair finally went back to the leg and Fifi got involved. Rude kissed her, so she slapped him. He brought her in the ring, but Flair grabbed Rude and put him in the Figure Four. While the referee helped Fifi take forever to exit, Rude pulled out some kind of illegal object and leveled Flair to win the title in 30:47. Sometimes, you watch a match this long and feel like it breezed by. This felt like it was twice as long. Tons of rest holds, nonsensical psychology and it was flat out boring. A massive disappointment, especially considering the talents involved. [*¾]
War Games: Davey Boy Smith, Dustin Rhodes, The Shockmaster and Sting w/ Animal vs. Harlem Heat, Sid Vicious and Vader w/ Harley Race
Shockmaster has become a silly guy with a construction helmet. Advisor Animal wanted him to start, an instant sign that he’s a bad advisor, but injured Rhodes jumped in. He showed heart, but mostly got his ass beat by Vader. Vader dominated and things got worse for Dustin as Kane (Stevie Ray) was next in. For two more minutes, Dustin took a beating until Sting joined to save his buddy. Smart move to send your best guy in when you’re in such trouble. Kane and Vader met him in ring one, but he ducked their offense and double clotheslined them. Sting’s fire lasted until Sid came in and swung the tide. Dustin was busted open at some point. Smith was next for his team, greeted by Sid. Smith and Sting got a cool spot where they double press slammed Sid into the roof. It didn’t look as good as it could’ve. Kole (Booker T) was the final member of his team and gave his guys one last advantage. Commentary hilariously predicted that Shockmaster would just trip and break in through the cage. Kole got the highlight of the match with a dive from one ring into the other. Great athleticism. Shockmaster entered, ran into everyone and then put Kole in a bear hug. And guess what? Kole gave up for an unsatisfying end at 16:39. One of the weakest War Games matches ever. Lackluster star power, a lame crowd and little to no action. It wasn’t glad out bad and didn’t overstay its welcome, it’s just that nothing of real note happened and that finish was piss poor. [**]
The faces left as the heel complained, with Kole claiming he never gave up.
