Kevin’s Random Reviews: WWE Elimination Chamber 2012

WWE Elimination Chamber 2012
February 19th, 2012 | Bradley Center in Milwaukee, Wisconsin | Attendance: 15,306

The road to WrestleMania XXVIII made a pivotal stop at Elimination Chamber. Just six weeks away from the “Show of Shows,” guys like Daniel Bryan and CM Punk were surprisingly at the top of Raw and Smackdown, while John Cena was gearing up for part one of “Twice in a Lifetime” against the Rock. What happens to help shape the biggest card of the year? We’ll find out on the third Elimination Chamber PPV ever.

The opening video package hyped how dangerous the chamber is. Your commentary team for the evening: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler, and Booker T.

WWE Championship Elimination Chamber: CM Punk [c] vs. Chris Jericho vs. Dolph Ziggler vs. Kofi Kingston vs. The Miz vs. R-Truth
Former Tag Team Champions Punk and Kofi started this. Their exchange is a lot of fun. It’s less intense than you typically get in a champion, which was a nice change of pace. It was two guys who respect each other having a competitive battle. Ziggler entered next, fresh off a TV program with Punk. Though he stopped to show off his athleticism, he added some aggression to the match. It was also interesting to see him against two faces, because it’s usually the other way around in a match like this. Punk and Kofi tried working together, only to collide in mid-air in a painful looking spot. Truth was in next. It was mostly uneventful and he was eliminated first via elbow off the top from Punk. The champ made sure to taunt Jericho in his pod beforehand. Miz got to enter next and came in hot. There was fury in everything he did. He was determined to get back to the WrestleMania main event for the second straight year. Jericho, who had just returned, entered last as Punk had Miz in the Anaconda Vice. Punk released the hold to battle with his new rival. They got interrupted, only for Jericho to get rid of Ziggler with a Codebreaker. There was another ten or so minutes of action before Kofi got sent packing with a Liontamer. I appreciated Jericho bringing out the old version on a flexible guy like Kingston. Jericho continued attacking Kofi as he was being taken out. Punk knocked Jericho out with a kick, sending him out of the Chamber and onto a cameraman. Jericho couldn’t continue and was removed from the match due to injury. That left it down to Punk and Miz. There was a tremendous spot where Miz caught a springboarding Punk into the Skull Crushing Finale for a near fall that the crowd totally bit on. Punk weathered a storm of Miz offense and hit the Go to Sleep to retain in 32:36. Not on the level of some of the better Chamber matches. Still, it was entertaining and featured some fun matchups and exchanges. The stuff with Jericho was a problem, as the WWE was basically treading water with him until Mania without having him and Punk get too physical. Anyway, this was very entertaining throughout. [***½]

We got a recap of the recent injury to Randy Orton. It caused him to have to miss tonight’s Smackdown Chamber match. A battle royal to replace him took place two days ago. It came down to Santino Marella and David Otunga (yes, you read that right), with Santino winning. They called it a Jeremy Lin moment. Remember Linsanity being a thing?

That led to a short video of Santino training like Rocky for tonight. It was set to Eugene’s old theme.

ONCE IN A LIFETIME ~ A video aired to show John Cena and how hard he’s training to face The Rock at WrestleMania. Cameos were made by future stars at the gym with him, including Seth Rollins, Roman Reigns, Xavier Woods, EC3, and Big E. Cena even put over some of them, like Big E for his lifting ability.

WWE Divas Championship: Beth Phoenix [c] vs. Tamina Snuka
I remember Beth was built up as an unstoppable champion. I fully expected it to lead to something big at Mania. Maybe a match with a returning Kharma or against the very popular AJ Lee. Instead, it went nowhere and ended like a wet fart. That’s ahead of this, though. As for this match, it was at least different from a lot of other women’s matches. It was based around both women being powerful. Tamina fought through Beth wearing her down and rallied using some of the offense her dad was known for. It’s almost as if she never developed a character of her own. She even hit the Superfly splash, but Beth kicked out. Since Tamina had nothing else in her arsenal, she tried again and Beth rolled outside. Once back in, Beth sent her into the corner and won with the Glam Slam in 7:16. I liked the finishing stuff, as it showed what made Beth work so well. The early portions were a bit dull. Surprisingly serviceable match considering Tamina being very not good. [**]

More from Santino training.

John Laurinaitis and David Otunga came out as Laurinaitis, the Raw GM, had a special announcement to make. People don’t mention it enough, but Big Johnny was a great heel authority figure. He stumbled through this promo, but the focus was on Teddy Long being bad as the Smackdown GM. Johnny was interrupted by the return of Alberto Del Rio. Del Rio put down Teddy and said Laurinaitis should be permanent GM of both Raw and Smackdown. That brought out Mark Henry, who had recently been suspended by Teddy. Henry called Teddy a bully who physically assaulted him. He, like Del Rio, supported Johnny as dual GM. The segment got better as Christian came out. He said Teddy ran an unsafe work environment and also supported Johnny. They took a picture together. I’m not a fan of promos on PPV, but at least this involved Christian.

Josh Matthews interviewed Big Show about his WrestleMania struggles and how important it would be to enter the show as champion. Ah, so they were planting the seeds for Show’s Mania story already.

World Heavyweight Championship Elimination Chamber: Daniel Bryan [c] vs. Big Show vs. WWE Intercontinental Champion Cody Rhodes vs. The Great Khali vs. Santino Marella vs. Wade Barrett
You’d think the match would start with workhorses, like Bryan and Rhodes. You’d be wrong. Barrett and Show kicked this match off. They kind of lumbered through this portion of the match and the crowd wasn’t interested. There were even some “boring” chants. Next in was Rhodes, though Show was hoping for Bryan. Rhodes was tentative to enter and for good reason, as Show threw him around. It took he and Barrett working together to slow down Show. Santino came in next and woke the crowd up. He was the sentimental favorite and he came in hot. Once he slowed down, more “boring” chants were heard. Cody got a small pop for a sweet moonsault near fall. Khali joined the fray fifth and hit everything in his path. And within a minute or so, Show cut him off with a spear and eliminated him. Smart booking. Bryan laughed at how he was in the pod away from Show, so the big man broke through the top of his pod to get him. He climbed in with him and beat on him, which is creative and not something I’d seen before in a Chamber. Show spent the next few minutes beating on Bryan, until Barrett and Rhodes worked together to eliminate him. While Rhodes wasted time celebrating, Santino eliminated him with a rollup. Santino ate a Cross Rhodes for his troubles. That meant that two heels, Bryan and Barrett, had to do battle. NXT SEASON ONE! Their exchange was strong, like their SummerSlam match back in 2011, though the crowd had nobody to cheer for while Santino was down. After a Bryan diving headbutt, Santino covered Barrett to get rid of him. Bryan was left with only Santino and laughed about it. He didn’t take him seriously. That set us up for a strong underdog ending. Santino used Bryan’s overconfidence against him to score a few near falls and surprisingly, the crowd bit on them. The Cobra wasn’t enough and Bryan then pulled him into the Yes Lock. Santino fought but had to tap in front of a red hot crowd at 34:04. The early portions were boring, but everything after Show’s elimination worked well. Considering the people involved, they did the best they could. That pop for Santino near the end was stellar. [***¼]

Post-match, Daniel Bryan’s celebration was cut short by the arrival of Sheamus, who won the Royal Rumble at the previous Pay-Per-View. Sheamus, ever the jerk babyface, attacked Bryan.

Backstage, they ran one of those unfunny Natalya farting segments. It ended up leading to a poorly acted situation involving Jack Swagger, Justin Gabriel, Hornswoggle, and Vickie Guerrero. Teddy Long appeared and booked Swagger/Gabriel. Lazy way to set up a nothing match.

WWE United States Championship: Jack Swagger [c] w/ Vickie Guerrero vs. Justin Gabriel
The problem with booking a match just moments before it happens is a lack of heat. Especially when it involves two midcarders who aren’t feuding. The crowd just can’t be bothered to care. Gabriel tried some of his high flying offense, but mostly was grounded by Swagger. The champion retained with an Ankle Lock in 3:05. Total filler. This felt like something I’d see on Superstars. [¾*]

Ambulance Match: John Cena vs. Kane
This was during the “embrace the hate” storyline that they used to fill time for Cena before he faced the Rock. It was terrible and the Cena/Eve/Zack Ryder stuff is widely considered some of the worst stuff WWE has ever put on TV. As expected, they brawled in and around the ring, before heading up towards the ambulance. Instead of staying there and trying to win, they fought back to the ring. There was a bit of storyline continuity when Kane knocked out Cena with his GLOVE OF DEATH submission. Kane pulled out a wheelchair to take Cena to the ambulance, which played off the wheelchair Ryder was in when Kane threw him off the stage. They tried showcasing Cena’s power, as he carried Kane up the steel steps for a table spot. Kane got free and put Cena through the table, which was followed by him walking to get a stretcher and walking back. It was boring. Cena ended up hitting Kane with an AA off the ambulance onto a nice soft padding below. He then put Kane in the ambulance to win in a long 21:20. It was better than their Rumble match, but not by much. Some of the brawling worked. However, it went on too long and featured too many things we see too often in Cena matches like this. Plus, the finishing spot off the ambulance looked terrible. [*½]

4.5

The final score: review Poor

The 411

Usually, the Elimination Chamber show is good for at least a few great matches. The Chamber itself is typically a well booked spectacle filled with action. Neither of these Chamber matches were bad, but they rank towards the bottom in the history of the match. The rest of the card is straight filler, with the Divas Title being the best of the bunch and that not being anything special.