wrestling / Video Reviews

The Name on the Marquee: WWF Prime Time Wrestling (8.24.1987)

March 9, 2018 | Posted by Adam Nedeff
WWF Prime Time Wrestling Bobby Heenan, WWE Network
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The Name on the Marquee: WWF Prime Time Wrestling (8.24.1987)  

-Originally aired August 24, 1987.

-Your hosts are Gorilla Monsoon and Bobby Heenan.

ROUGEAU BROTHERS vs THE SHADOWS
-Joined in progress from a TV taping. Jacque locks up with Shadow #2. Your commentary team once again is Leaping Lanny Poffo and Don Muraco. Rougeaus work the arm of Thin Shadow. Raymond monkeyflips him. Raymond monkeyflips both Shadows and clears the ring. Big Shadow tags in and misses a kneedrop, so the Rougeaus go to work on the leg.

-Shadows turn it around by getting Lacques caught in the corner and attacking. Neckbreaker by Big Shadow, and a front facelock, and you know it! They’re doing the false-tag spot! I swear, that spot is the 1987 version of “Everybody ends up on one side of the ring and then the last guy in the ring jumps onto all of them.”

-Thin Shadow throws Jacques over the top. Jacques skins the cat and calmly walks past the Shadow and makes the tag in a funny visual. Raymond cleans house, and Le Bombe De Rougeau gets the win. Pretty paint-by-numbers, and the fans were just not buying into The Shadows as a threat during their heat segment.

OUTBACK JACK vs ONE MAN GANG (with Slick)
-Joined in progress from Philadelphia. Lock-ups go surprisingly nowhere as Jack seems to have no trouble matching power with the Gang. Gang shakes off the shoulderblocks, but Outback tries a series of “Whammos” (Dick Graham, calling a punch) and that dazes the Gang. Hammerlock by Outback, but Gang steps backward and just sandwiches Gang in the corner.

-Gang drops knees to the back and then applies a bearhug. Jack survives and mounts a mini-comeback with Irish whips, but Gang rebounds with a huge clothesline, and the Master Blaster (gourdbuster) gets three for the Gang.

THE BATTLE FOR BAM-BAM
-Jesse Ventura meets Johnny V and breaks the news to him that he’s out of the running for Bam-Bam. Johnny V goes predictably nuts.

-We go to the interview platform in the arena, where Craig DeGeorge wants to talk to Bobby Heenan. There are rumors that Paul Orndorff resents having Rick Rude in the Heenan Family, so Heenan brings out Paul Orndorff and asks him to tell the fans that Rick Rude is an asset to the Heenan Family that he has a better body than Orndorff. Orndorff snaps like a twig and says that rejoining the Heenan Family a year ago made him completely miserable and he fires Heenan for the second time. And because Orndorff doesn’t waste time, he immediately introduces his new manager, Oliver Humperdink.

-In the studio, Heenan talks about how embarrassing it was half an hour later when Orndorff cried and apologized in the locker room and begged to be allowed back into the family.

“The Million Dollar Man” TED DIBIASE (with Virgil) vs CHRIS CURTIS
-This is great. This is supposed to be DiBiase’s Wrestling Challenge debut, but DiBiase is insulted that someone of his caliber is stuck wrestling a jobber and refuses to wrestle the match. He calls another jobber, Mr. Washington, down to ringside and offers him $5,000 to wrestle Chris Curtis in his place.

-Washington sticks the money in his tights and then starts the match. It ends up being the best week of Chris Curtis’ life, as he just kicks the shit out of Washington and wins it with a backbreaker in about one minute. Backbreaker gets three for the biggest win of Chris Curtis’ career, as Gorilla points out that the record for this match will show that he got a pinfall win over Ted DiBiase.

-DiBiase’s furious about losing a match by proxy, so Virgil holds Washington in place while DiBiase digs into his tights and takes the money back, and then DiBiase and Virgil just destroy the poor guy a second time.

-Gene Okerlund talks to Randy Savage, who has “Macho Madness” running through his veins. I’m guessing it’s also running through his urine at the moment.

JUNKYARD DOG vs OUTLAW RON BASS
-This show just became mandatory viewing just for Don Muraco bellowing “GRAAAAAAB DEM CAAAAAKES!” as JYD walks to ringside.

-They slug it out to start, and JYD just calmly slams Bass. They take turns missing moves and then back away from each other as the referee is just super-angry about something and yelling at the Dog. Big right hand by the Dog and he headbutts Bass on the mat until he accidentally backs himself crotch-first into the corner post.

-Bass comes back and chokes the Dog, and they’re already wrestling like it’s the closing minutes of a draw. Bass elbows JYD down for two. More choking by Bass as Lanny and Don unironically praise both men for their agility and cardiovascular training.

-Big boot and an elbow by Bass gets two. They slug it out more until JYD puts Bass on the mat with a headbutt. They slug it out more and apply simultaneous chokeholds. They slug it out more and Bass gets a two-count from a knee. They slug it out more, and then they slug it out more. JYD headbutts Bass out to the floor. Bass makes it up to the apron and tries headbutting the Dog, hurting himself of course.

-Back in, JYD “rings the bell” and they tumble out to the floor and they slug it out. Referee counts out both men as they slug it out more. They have a stand-off with Bass wielding his whip and JYD wielding his chain, and Muraco catches me off-guard by referring to JYD’s chain as “Georgia.” I give the two 300-pounders all the credit in the world for working eight minutes without a resthold, but damn, that was a very limited arsenal.

NIKOLAI VOLKOFF (with Slick) vs JERRY ALLEN
-Volkoff hammers Allen down. Allen starts throwing chops and sunset flips Volkoff for two. I feel like they always wanted to do something with Allen but no one could figure out a spot for him.

-Atomic drop by Allen and he faceplants Nikolai. Legdrop by Allen, but Nikolai kicks out “with authority” as Vince would say. Volkoff fights back and boots Allen out to the floor. Allen re-enters the ring by coming off the top rope with another sunset flip for two. Dropkick by Allen and he’s all over Volkoff with a flurry of punches, but Volkoff puts a stop to it and finishes with a backbreaker. Impressive showing by Allen.

-Gorilla and Bobby make their first mention of “The New Wrestling Album,” coming soon to a record store near you!

RICK MARTEL vs BARRY HOROWITZ
-Jesse says Martel should just be billed as “The Can Connection” going forward.

-Horowitz works the arm. Martel fights back with a dropkick. Horowitz goes to the eyes and rams him from turnbuckle to turnbuckle. Martel takes advantage of an Irish whip by leaping onto the middle turnbuckle and coming off with a bodypress to get the pin.

-After the bell, the Islanders come to the ring and attack, but Tito Santana charges the ring and makes the save.

-Slick is here to let us know that the new album “Piledriver: The Wrestling Two Album” includes the greatest vocal performance of all time, a little tune called “Jive Soul Bro.”

“The Natural” BUTCH REED (with Slick) vs JIM EVANS
-Reed goes to work as the commentators recap an angle we haven’t seen, where Reed had a posedown with Superstar Billy Graham and attacked him afterward, targeting the hip.

-Reed chokes Evans over the top rope and dumps him out to the floor, back in, Reed gorilla slams Evans and pins him with one foot.

-After the match, Reed demands that “Fallen Star” Billy Graham come to ringside and face him. The Network-dubbed music for Graham is just excruciating. Graham knocks Reed right out of the ring and chases Slick out of there.

BRUTUS “The Barber” BEEFCAKE vs KING HARLEY RACE (with Bobby Heenan)
-Long stall session as Harley really plays up being afraid of scissors. Brutus applies the sleeper right away, shocking the fans, but Harley makes the ropes. Beefcake just takes advantage of that by clotheslining him over the top and onto the floor. Harley tries to re-enter the ring, but Beefcake gives him a right and Harley tumbles down the ring steps.

-Brutus uses a forearm to bring Harley back into the ring. Clothesline by Brutus as Harley is just getting nothing in this match. Irish whip by Brutus and Harley flips and flies over the top and onto the floor. –Back from commercial, Harley turns it around with a headbutt and an elbow as Lanny points out that part of Harley’s brilliant technique as a wrestler is that “he moves at an agonizingly slow pace.”

-Harley goes for a suplex, but Brutus reverses it. Brutus puts the boots to Harley and chokes him out. Harley is just getting guzzled here as Muraco talks about the “coronation” that they did for Harley a long while back. “Heenan said he was taping something and paid everyone a hundred bucks to come to the ring, and then we found out he was giving this goof a crown and we had to stand there and watch.”

-Harley goes for a suplex, but Brutus lands on his feet and applies the sleeper again. Heenan provides the distraction, Beefcake falls for it, Harley gets a knee to the back and pins Brutus immediately. Beefcake puts Heenan to sleep after the match. Harley stops the haircut but takes yet another beating. This is astonishing, as Beefcake took 95% of this thing and Harley just looked like a total goof.

6.0
The final score: review Average
The 411
Matches were a real box of parts this week, but at least it had some fun angles to keep it interesting.
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