The Name on the Marquee: Smoky Mountain Wrestling (9.4.1993)

-Originally aired September 4, 1993.

-We’re in Clintwood, VA.

-Your hosts are Bob Caudle & Dr. Dutch Mantell. Dutch draws two names for Beat the Champ because the title is vacant. In an astonishing coincidence, he draws Ricky Morton and Jimmy Del Ray.

BRUISE BROTHERS (SMW Champions) vs ROBBIE EAGLE & JASON WEST
-I’m now angry at the Bruise Brothers for not time-traveling to 1995 and supplying some cash flow to keep this company afloat.

-Bruise Brothers murder the jobbers with folding chairs while Kevin Sullivan sits in on commentary. Jason West gets knocked over the barricade and Irish whipped, which clears out two full rows’ worth of chairs. Jobbers get dragged back in and thrown over the top rope for the DQ.

-After the match, Kevin Sullivan congratulates the champions and makes an offer to the missing Jim Cornette to surrender the Bruise Brothers. He reasons that he’s more in line with the kind of guidance that the Bruise Brothers need. Bruise Brothers happily accept the offer. That actually is a pretty logical threesome and I’m already looking forward to whatever batshit crazy house show match this is building to.

-Bob Caudle is with Dirty White Boy and Mr. Ron Wright. Mr. Ron Wright is happy that Tracy Smothers is too injured to ever wrestle again. Caudle provides a medical update; Smothers’ doctor has performed a thorough examination and determined that Smothers’ knee ligament isn’t as ripped up as previously thought. Smothers needs about six weeks off, but he can and will return to wrestling. White Boy is shocked, and Mr. Ron Wright immediately starts clutching his chest from the shock of not being able to get rid of Smothers.

-We get words from Tracy Smothers. Brian Lee & Dirty White Boy thought they got the job done last month, but Tracy’s coming back. And he’s got a surprise for his doctor too…He’ll be in the ring on September 12. He’s already signed a title match against Brian Lee. And Dirty White Boy has to stand inside a shark cage at ringside, just to ensure that he can’t interfere.

-Dirty White Boy is furious that Brian Lee got the full $25,000 payday and NOW it turns out that Lee couldn’t even get the job done. DWB and Mr. Wright vow that they’re going to get their money back.

-We get a house show plug for a big house show spectacular on October 1. It’s The Big Apple Grapple, and with a name like The Big Apple Grapple, it can only be happening in one place…Paintsville, KY. Tammy Fytch and Brian Lee show up, complaining about how it’s beneath them to show up at an apple-picking festival and have a title match right in the middle of it. To top it off, we move on to the next night’s big house show spectacular, Apple Brawl. There’s a $5,000 prize for the winner of a battle royal. Heavenly Bodies show up and promise that if either of them wins the battle royal, they’re gonna buy some apples.

-Historical moment, as we finally meet WWA President Dennis Corraluzzo, who has sent SMW a prepared videotaped statement. Corraluzzo is in a messy, garbage-strewn office and lashes out at the disrespect that their reigning champion, Chris Candido, AND his gold-plated title belt have been treated with. He thinks backwoods hillbillies in the Smoky Mountains could learn a lot from the way that people in New Jersey handle their disagreements, and if you don’t believe him, just go to the Meadowlands Arena and check out Jimmy Hoffa’s burial site.

-At the end of the tape, Corraluzzo thinks the camera is shut off and tells somebody named “Little Guido” to go down to SMW and make sure that nobody messes with Chris Candido anymore.

“White Lightning” TIM HORNER vs MIKE SAMPSON
-Chris Candido is on commentary, talking about how Corraluzzo’s family made their fortune in concrete. Concrete shoes, to be specific.

-Horner armdrags Sampson. Sampson drives an elbow into the jaw and goes to work with closed fists and snapmares him for one. Horner fights back with a Samoan drop and a pump splash for two. Natural bridge finishes. Candido heads to the ring and whips Horner with a belt, an anticipation of their Country Whippin’ Match. Horner manages to snatch it from him and chases Candido around ringside with it.

DOWN AND DIRTY WITH DUTCH
-We go to the still bedridden Jim Cornette, trying to call his mama who’s at the diamond mines in Africa overseeing her investment. Jimmy Del Ray is playing with all the stuffed animals on Cornette’s bed and becomes enamored with a little toy lion, and Cornette lets him keep it just to shut him up. Cornette BARELY made it out of bed under his own power and went to Summerslam, and he’s so annoyed by the home field advantage that the Steiner Brothers had that he’s demanding that the Steiners come to SMW for a rematch. Cornette hints that if he becomes commissioner of SMW later this month, he’s going to change the rules and allow the piledriver. He promises that Terry Funk is going to leave Bob Armstrong crippled.

So Dutch is now live with Bob Armstrong. He says he’s a MARINE and a VETERAN, which means he’s already fought for his life before. Fighting Terry Funk is nothing that he’s unprepared for.

NON-TITLE: “Prime Time” BRIAN LEE (SMW Heavyweight Champion, with Tammy Fytch) vs BOBBY BLAZE
-Blaze hiptosses and armdrags Lee quickly. Lee goes to the floor for a breather and Blaze meets him out there with a plancha. Lee fights back by posting Blaze and tossing him back inside. Lee targets the throat with a chinlock and choking. Lee goes for a backdrop and Blaze catches him with a pair of kicks. Blaze goes to the top rope and dives onto Lee, but Lee powerslams him and gets the pin clean as a sheet. Cornette should have just renamed him Special Delivery Blaze; it’s exactly the role that Bobby is being used in at this point. Jobber who MIGHT pull off a miracle this week.

-Tammy Fytch doesn’t feel safe with perverted Tracy Smothers trying to put his hands on her. Lee says there’s no way that Smothers is healthy enough to wrestle again, so he’s not giving the $25,000 back. DWB and Mr. Wright show up to get their refund. Lee says that the money is already spent. Fytch tells them that the money is still in the bank…but there’s no reason to give the money back because Lee can just reinjure him on September 12. Tammy takes Mr. Wright’s wheelchair and rolls him away, saying she just needs to talk privately with him for a little bit. They disappear and DWB & Lee exchange looks in a really funny ending as they gradually figure this out.

BEAT THE CHAMP TV TITLE: RICKY MORTON (with Robert Gibson) vs JIMMY DEL RAY (with Tom Pritchard)
-Morton applies a side headlock. Shoulderblocks and a hiptoss by Morton. Backdrop and a dropkick follow. Morton stays on Del Ray with an armbar. Del Ray gets aggressive with right hands and choking. Morton tries to mount a comeback, but Del Ray clotheslines him down and drops a leg for two. Powerbomb by Del Ray looks to finish, but Del Ray wants to dish out more. Morton starts to make a comeback, but Pritchard passes a weapon to his partner, Del Ray wallops Morton with it and gets three to become your new Beat the Champ TV Champion.

-Bob Caudle talks to the Heavenly Bodies. In 1993 alone, they’ve wrestled in SMW, WCW, and WWF, and they’ll go ANYWHERE that a tag team can make money. So, not Memphis or Philadelphia, then. They dare the Steiner Brothers to come to SMW and try their luck on Heavenly Bodies home turf. Rock & Roll Express sneaks up and attacks them, clearing the interview area and promising that they’re gonna keep fighting, no matter what problems they might face.

7.4

The final score: review Good

The 411

Just wall-to-wall storylines through the entire hour, and that's the way I like it!