The Shimmy 2.19.07: The Batista Report Card (Part Two)

Hello kiddies, how are you this Monday? Glad to hear it. With No Way Out in the books we really are on the Road to WrestleMania (I feel like I’ve been saying that forever at this point) and the PPV matches should start being lined up any minute. I hope you all are excited as I am as I think this year’s Mania could turn into a real classic. I’m feeling a mixed vibe combining WrestleMania XIX and WrestleMania 22, in a good way of course. This week we continue our own Road to WrestleMania by finishing up the Batista Report Card. This week we will look at all of Batista’s PPV efforts on the blue brand, including last night’s main event. With all the pleasantries out of the way, let’s get started.

World Heavyweight Title Match: Batista© vs. JBL (Great American Bash 2005)

Batista’s first title defense on SmackDown was a natural pairing, as JBL was the No. 1 heel on SmackDown at the time. Batista and JBL also had issues dating back from when Batista was making up his mind whose championship to go after at WrestleMania. One would think that two brawlers like this would mesh well. While they would go on to have some pretty entertaining matches in the future, this first match was far from good. It was plodding and dull and it had a DQ ending to boot. A clichéd DQ ending even. JBL and Batista have both stated since that they didn’t have a lot of chemistry together and this match is a testament to that.

My Grade: D-

World Heavyweight Title, No Holds Barred Match: Batista© vs. JBL (SummerSlam 2005)

Batista and JBL would make up for their lackluster showing at the Great American Bash with a surprisingly good brawl at SummerSlam. When the initial plans for a Batista-Muhammad Hassan title match fell through do to the cowardly treatment of the Hassan character by WWE management, WWE had no choice but to fall back on JBL. It turned out to be a good decision as Batista and JBL brawled all over the ringside area and put together a fine showing. Batista put the a definitive finishing stamp on the match with a big Batista Bomb onto the steel ring steps.

My Grade: B

World Heavyweight Title Match: Batista© vs. Eddie Guerrero (No Mercy 2005)

From the Eddie Guerrero Report Card: And now for Eddie’s last match. This match was a lot better than I think a lot of people expected, and Eddie and Batista had a really good chemistry together. Remember, friends don’t shake hands…friends gotta HUUUUG. Haha, I still laugh thinking about that. I remember being a little upset that Eddie lost to Dave’s spinebuster, but considering everyone else he has put away with that since then, it’s not so bad. It’s fitting that Eddie’s last PPV match was in the main event, on his birthday no less. I wish we could have seen what the future would have held for Latino Heat.

My Grade: B+

Interpromotional Street Fight: Batista vs. Jonathan Coachman (Taboo Tuesday 2005)

Can we say squash? Actually this wasn’t quite a squash as Batista also had to contender with the bizarre backup of Golust and Vader. Perhaps one of the funniest things I’ve seen is Batista yelling “Fuck!” when he realized Vader was just too fat to spinebuster. I’m not going to grade this match, but it’s certainly one you can skip, bar the spinebuster on Vader.

My Grade: N/A

Interpromotional Classic Survivor Series Elimination Match: Batista, Randy Orton, JBL, Rey Mysterio, & Bobby Lashley vs. Shawn Michaels, Big Show, Kane, Chris Masters, & Carlito (Survivor Series 2005)

This was a match that Batista probably shouldn’t have been in, and he definitely shouldn’t have taken the bumps he did. The match itself was fine and they did do the relatively smart move by taking Batista out early, so that is at least a plus. Batista did come off really well playing the leader and they even did a good job at pushing the future Batista-Orton feud that never materialized due to Batista’s injury.

My Grade: B+

Interpromotional Match: Batista & Rey Mysterio vs. Big Show & Kane (Armageddon 2005)

I have unfortunately yet to see this match so I don’t have a grade for you. Sorry, folks.

My Grade: N/A

Batista vs. Mr. Kennedy (Great American Bash 2006)

And this was Batista’s first PPV match back from his injury. As most of you know this was originally supposed to be Mark Henry in this spot, but after little Rey Mysterio injured the World’s Strongest Man Mr. Kennedy had to step up as a replacement. Considering some of the lackluster matches Batista has had since his injury this one was pretty good. That could also be a testament to Kennedy, though, who has really shined over the past few months. All in all a good match which was a positive sign of things to come.

My Grade: B-

World Heavyweight Title Match: King Booker© vs. Batista (SummerSlam 2006)

Ugh. I was all excited for this match, and I even anticipated the crappy ending. I didn’t anticipate the crappy match though. Horrible, sloppy, plodding match showing us just how little chemistry Batista and Booker have together. Maybe it’s a good thing they didn’t have that match at No Way Out 2003.

My Grade: D-

World Heavyweight Title, Fatal Four-Way Match: King Booker© vs. Bobby Lashley vs. Finlay vs. Batista (No Mercy 2006)

Batista rebounded a bit quality wise largely due to his feud with Finlay. WWE apparently took notice of that (or they just wanted to bad their buyrate, take your pick) and added the Batista-Finlay feud to the already scheduled Booker-Lashley match. The match itself was a bit clunky, a sizable step back from some of the great mult-man matches. By no means was it really bad, but it makes you wonder if thing might have been better had they just left it as two singles matches, especially since we’ve seen how good those singles matches have been in the past.

My Grade: C+

World Heavyweight Title, Last Chance Match (Title Change on DQ or Count Out): King Booker© vs. Batista (Survivor Series 2006)

Even though Batista and Booker didn’t seem to have that much chemistry in their previous meetings, this match had to happen. While it was leaps and bounds better than their SummerSlam encounter I would probably rank it lower than their rematch on SmackDown. It was nice to see a unique ending regarding a face title win, and I was personally thrilled to see the reign of King Booker come to an end. Batista was once again on top the mountain even if the route to get there wasn’t the best in ring wise.

My Grade: C

Interpromotional Dream Tag Team Match: Batista & John Cena vs. King Booker & Finlay (Armageddon 2006)

A few weeks later another PPV rolled around and WWE was in need of a PPV main event. Instead of having us suffer through another Booker-Batista match they decided to give us a “dream” tag team match. While in theory it was a pretty cool idea I don’t think it came off quite as well as they’d hoped. The match was pretty standard, and while not bad, not exactly PPV main event material. Outside of the historical factor of the WWE Champion and World Heavyweight Champion teaming together for the first time this match wasn’t that significant on the grand scale.

My Grade: B-

World Heavyweight Title Match: Batista© vs. Mr. Kennedy (Royal Rumble 2007)

We get some more Batista-Kennedy greatness here. Kennedy has really showed how great he can be in these big match situations, and Batista has been a fairly competent power wrestler as of late. While I don’t agree that it was a carry job by Kennedy, I do think that the match succeeded largely due to Kennedy’s efforts. Perhaps if we were a few months away Kennedy might have even stood a chance at winning the match.

My Grade: B

Interpromotional Match: Batista & Undertaker vs. John Cena & Shawn Michaels (No Way Out 2007)

Unfortunately I made a last minute trip out of town so I don’t have a recap of No Way Out this week. I’m planning on having my usual post-PPV stuff here next week, and you’ll get a grade for this match during the Undertaker Report Card. Sorry for the delay.

My Grade: To Be Continued…

A Reason For Bullet Points

Wow, big week this week, huh? This is TNA, Thursday Night Raw, Samoa Joe becomes No. 1 Contender, and No Way Out. Gotta love this time of year.

I actually caught most of This is TNA last Monday, and I was relatively impressed. I thought the production was really good and the matches they showed were a pretty good representation of what they have. I was a bit underwhelmed with Angle-Joe, but I kind of figured that going in.

So you mean to tell me that Vince McMahon, the man who was on the cover of Muscle & Fitness a year ago is afraid of Donald freaking Trump? Please, Vinnie Mac would smoke him.

Elijah Burke must be one lucky dude. I would have sworn his career would have been dead after he turned down a spot in the Spirit Squad, but look at him now. He is the Vince McMahon endorsed future of ECW while most of the Spirit Squad is still in Louisville. What a wacky business this is.

Samoa Joe fans don’t get your hopes up for a Joe title victory at Destination X. I can just hear the complaining already…

Elevation X looks pretty cool, but AJ vs. Rhino again?

I don’t see how this Flair-Carlito feud is going to actually help Carlito other than possibly setting up a heel turn to freshen his character. The bad thing about taking a real life situation like Carlito’s apparent laziness and making it into a story is that the story will eventually pay off. We’re going to have to believe that Carlito has ignited the passion in him to be all he can be. The only problem is that that doesn’t mean that it really has. Carlito can act all devoted he wants as part of an angle but that doesn’t necessarily mean that’s how its going to be in real life.

I have a sneaking suspicion that Edge and Randy Orton are going to weasel their way into the Raw main event at WrestleMania now that No Way Out it over. Just you see.

I’m quite digging the Trump-McMahon feud. Trump is surprisingly comfortable in a wrestling ring and I look forward to seeing where this goes. Plus, one of them is going to be bald, how sweet is that?

So I got my Observer subscription settled out and while I’m wasn’t too impressed with the first two issues, I still have high hopes for it. I am a bit upset at the predominance of MMA coverage but MMA did have a big week last week so I guess it’s OK. I just want some juicy stuff the closer we get to WrestleMania.

Andy! Andy! At Last You Have Some Feedback!

SerioS has his WrestleMania predictions:

Main EventL Batista vs. The Undertaker

I’d have Untertaker win the title, then drop it to Kane at the next Smackdown PPV. I’d have Batista in line for a rematch against ‘Taker, but taken out somehow by Kane. This would lead to a Kane-Batista feud, and a string of classic big man matches, to keep Vince happy.

Shawn Michaels vs. John Cena

I guess I have a fondness for the vets, ‘cus I’d put Shawn over. I’d then have him drop the title to Edge, in a triple threat with Cena. Randy Orton would interfere & start up a feud with Cena, while Edge could establish himself as champ, with some victories over HBK.

Edge w/ Vince & Shane McMahon vs. Hulk Hogan w/ Donald Trump

Again, hats off to the vets. I can’t see Edge complaining about jobbing to his idol, the icon.

Money In The Bank: Randy Orton, Chris Benoit, Booker T, Carlito, Rob Van Dam, and Jeff Hardy

Randy Orton! He could benefit from working a match with likes of King Booker & Chris Benoit

TLC: London/Kendrick, MNM, WGTT, The Hardy’s, Dreamer/Sandman, and Hardcore Holly/Test

Simply mayhem!!! If it were up to me, I’d have both Tag-Titles on the line, where the victors were guaranteed to be the Undisputed Tag-Team Champions. I’d use this to re-ignite the Tag-Title picture, having the titles defrnded on all 3 brands, against more contenders.

Umaga vs. Mick Foley

C’mon! Give Mick a WrestleMania rub.

Diva Elimination for the Women’s Title: Mickie James, Melina, Victoria, Torrie Wilson, Ashley, and Ariel

Who cares, right now! It puts the Divas on display and makes sure the title is defended.

Cruiserweight Triple Threat: Gregory Helms, Jimmy Wang Yang, and Chavo Guerro

Put Chavo over, so it’ll add to his eventual feud with Rey

ECW Title: Bobby Lashley vs. Snitsky vs. Kane

Have it promoted as Lashley issuing an open challenge to all comers. I’d have Lashley coming out on top, in a classic big man match.

What do ya’ think?

That’s not bad, but you have a few problems. One, they can’t do TLC and Money in the Bank. I also don’t foresee the Cruiserweight Title making it on the card, at least not with Wang Yang. At one point I would have liked to have seen Kane on ECW, but I’m been impressed with his run on SmackDown and quite frankly I’m getting tired of random brand switches.

500 Good Words w/ Matt Adamson

Donald Trump is one person that I thought I would never see participate in professional wrestling at any point, especially outside of its boom periods. However, last Monday I had the pleasure of being on hand when the legendary Donald Trump stepped into a wrestling ring for the first time to challenge Vince McMahon to a match at WrestleMania 23. In the end however, after a considerably calm confrontation where Vince *gasp* kept his cool, we were left with the announcement that Donald Trump and Vince will provide a representative to wrestle on their behalf, and both Vince and The Donald will be in their corners for the big event. An even bigger announcement came next. If Vince’s guy loses, he gets his head shaved, and if Trump’s representative loses, The Donald gets his head shaved. Talk about going from potential disastrous to potentially legendary in a matter of minutes.

Being a frequent reader of 411wrestling.com’s wrestling columns and a frequent poster on 411wrestling.com’s forums, I have seen a variety of opinions on this segment that has yet to air in the United States and what it represents for the immediate future. Some hate the idea of a non-wrestler such as Trump being involved in a wrestling angle. I’ve heard things such as Vince giving the fans what he wants them to want, rather than just giving him what they want. I’ve also heard some say that it’ll be great for the business and great for the TV ratings and buy rate.

What we are going to have for this match at WrestleMania is certainly going to be a memorable moment. The talk of Hogan being involved in the match coupled with the mainstream media coverage and the potential of one of two billionaires getting their head shaved is setting up quite a memorable WrestleMania moment, and I’m looking forward to it.

Imagine for a moment… 70,000 screaming fans filling Ford Field in Detroit to capacity, thousands of camera lights flashing as a bloody Shane McMahon climbs to the top rope. He looks around at this gigantic crowd, and they are screaming in anticipation of what he is about to do next. Hogan lies semi-conscious in another corner, blood running down his face. Vince hands Shane a metal trash can and the crowd gets even louder. They don’t want McMahon to win, but they want to see Shane make the jump. He steadies himself and jumps, placing the trash can between his two feet and Hogan as he hits the perfect long range drop kick. He then pulls Hogan to the middle of the ring… The referee counts… 1… 2… 3… Shane has won the match, and now, we all get to watch Donald Trump get his head shaved. Ha! Well, that’s one scenario, but it sounds good doesn’t it? And while it might not be the result we get or the greatest technical masterpiece, we’ll be remembering it as one of the all-time great WrestleMania moments for years to come.

I’m interested in what you, the readers think about the McMahon/Trump fued. Drop me a line: [email protected]. Thanks for reading.

The Shimmy Likes It Raw!

What’s on tap for tonight?

Women’s Title Match: Mickie James© vs. Melina; Look for Melina to win the belt here setting up the rubber match for WrestleMania.

What Mania announcements will be made? We have no more PPVs between now and April 1, so we are full steam ahead!

Before I leave you all I’d like to say a few words about some people in my life experiencing some tough times. Firstly my Uncle Rudy, who has taken a bad turn this week. I wish him the best possible solution to his problems and hopefully peace for those that are closest to him, especially to my Dad. Secondly, to Beth and Rob who have had a trying week themselves. Finally, to my buddy Brody who never seems to be able to catch a break in life. Know I’m thinking about you, pal, and I hope you can be happy.

With the somber stuff out of the way I invite you all back next week as we start The Undertaker- Dead Man v. 2.0 Report Card. You won’t want to miss it. Until then, don’t die. Clark…out.