411’s WWE Raw Report 07.21.03

411’s WWE Raw Report 07.21.03
Live from Los Angeles, California
Announcers are The Coach & The King
Report done *EXCLUSIVELY* for 411MANIA by Jacob Ziegler

Opening WWE montage, with pictures of Bischoff and Austin.

We go right to a video package of last week’s events regarding Stone Cold Steve Austin and his potential dismissal from the GM spot, and the JR/Kane interview.

The Union Underground gets Raw underway, as per usual.

Coach and King welcome us, and plug the RVD/Kane match, as well as the Jericho/Michaels WrestleMania rematch.

Eric Bischoff is in the ring, and promises that Steve Austin’s run as co-GM is over. Bischoff again blames Austin for Kane’s recent reign of terror. Linda McMahon, the CEO is on her way out to some weird techno music. Linda needs Eric to listen, because she will only say this one time. Linda places the blame for Kane’s actions squarely on Kane. Linda says JR has not placed charges, but Kane is still under house arrest, and must undergo extensive psychological evaluation. But Kane will still be here tonight to face RVD. Bischoff is 100% supportive of Linda’s choice. Bischoff changes the focus back to Austin getting fired, and that prompts Austin’s music to hit. Austin refuses to apologize. Austin says he will beat Kane to death, or whip his ass. Linda informs Bischoff that Austin will not be fired tonight. Linda does not like it when Bischoff puts words in her mouth. Linda says that there is a problem in the GM’s office. Linda says Austin has done a good job. But she also says that Steve cannot beat up WWE superstars… unless he is physically provoked. This goes for Kane, too. Austin says he has a lot to think about. Linda says that if Austin steps down as GM, she will have to turn total control of Raw back to Eric Bischoff. Austin says he will think about it. Linda gives him a week to think about it, then advises that Austin take the night off. Bischoff gets cocky, so Linda tells him to take the night off as well. Austin decides to drink a little beer. He gives one to Linda. We go to commercial.

The Extreme Blast of the Night is a replay of the Gail Kim/Molly Holly highlights from last week. Me thinks this means a women’s match.

Trish Stratus & Gail Kim vs. Molly Holly & Victoria

Steven Richards has his funny pink hat on. The stars of “The Mullets” are in the audience. Molly and Gail start with some mat wrestling. Trish is quickly tagged in. Double team by Gail and Trish gets two. Chops by Trish, and Molly reverses an Irish whip and Victoria knocks Trish down from the outside. Molly takes control. Molly gets a two-count and goes to the reverse chinlock, then hits Trish with a clothesline. Bodyslam, and Victoria is tagged in and hits the somersault legdrop. Widow’s peak reversed to a headscissors by Trish, but Molly cuts off the tag. Chick kick by Trish, and Gail is tagged in and gets a crossbody on Molly. Gail up on Molly’s shoulders and gets a spinning hurracanranna. Gail botches a move, and Molly hits a backbreaker. Victoria hammers on Gail, as Trish hits the handstand-rana on Molly. Then Gail Kim hits another huracanranna, but Molly breaks it up. Victoria rips Gail’s shirt off. Trish accidentally kicks Gail, and Molly gets the pin for three.
WINNERS – Molly Holly & Victoria

Lawler and Coach talk more about JR and the injuries he sustained last week. Tonight’s wwe.com poll is “Should JR press charges against Kane?”

We see a promo for the Sable/Stephanie McMahon match at Vengeance, the Smackdown!-only pay-per-view.

Coach and King are hyping the Michaels/Jericho and Kane/RVD matches again.

Terri is standing by, waiting for Kane’s arrival, escorted by police officers. Jericho interrupts to a big pop. Jericho changes the words to “Hooray for Hollywood” to “Hooray for Jericho.” Austin interrupts, and he and Bischoff have a confrontation in the back. They argue about the fate of WCW. Austin flips Bischoff the bird.

Evolution’s music comes on, and here come Triple H, Randy Orton, and Ric Flair.

Randy Orton vs. Val Venis

Orton has the mic, and brings up Mick Foley. Orton coins his new name, “The Legend Killer.”

Triple H has joined the commentary team. Val puts Orton in a headlock, and hits a shoulderblock for two. Armbar by Val, and knees to the arm. HHH makes jokes about JR getting burned. Val goes for a catapult, and punches Orton. Back elbow by Val and a bodyslam. Running kneedrop by Val, and mounted punches. Chops by Val, and Orton reverses an Irish whip, as Flair grabs Val’s foot. Orton hits an awesome dropkick. Back body drop by Val, and a sleeper. Orton reverses for a sleeper of his own, which Val reverses to a Blue Mountain Thunder Bomb, or whatever that move is called. Spinebuster by Val, who goes up to the top. Val misses the money shot, and Orton hits the RKO for the victory.
WINNER – Randy Orton

HHH is going to cut an in-ring promo, and tells Orton to put a shirt on before the chicks maul him. It is the brand new Evolution t-shirt. HHH puts over all three members of the group. Goldberg’s music should be hitting any time now. And there it is, right on cue. Goldberg and Triple H face off. Crowd chants “Goldberg.” Goldberg says Hunter is nothing but another victim, and he’s next. Flair and Orton look like they’re ready to pounce. HHH calls the troops off. Evolution leaves the ring without a physical confrontation.

Nothing beats World Wrestling Entertainment live.

Orton wants to go beat up Goldberg, and Flair explains to him that this company operates on their time. HHH says Orton needs to do the other half of the plan. What could that mean?

The WrestleMania Recall is the Shawn Michaels/Chris Jericho match. Which is a good segue for …

Chris Jericho vs. Shawn Michaels

We go to commercial first.

Sable hosts TNN’s Slammin Saturday Night this week.

Now we are ready to start the match proper. Jericho has awesome new tights. They lockup and Jericho backs Michaels to the corner. Arm wringer by Michaels, reversed by Jericho. Fireman carry by Jericho and Michaels gets a headscisscors. Jericho reverses into a front facelock. Michaels slips out into a hammerlock. Jericho fights out and reverses the hammerlock. Michaels tosses Jericho to the floor. Back in the ring, headlock by Jericho. Michaels fights out with a top wristlock, but Jericho gets the headlock back, and takes Michaels to the mat. Back up, and Michaels fights out of the headlock. Jericho slugs away, and hits a few chops, and goes back to the headlock. Michaels whips Jericho off, and Jericho nails Michaels in the face. Sunset flip by Michaels is reversed, and reversed, and reversed again, and reversed, and reversed again, into the backslide spot which gets two for Michaels. Whew. Headlock by Michaels on the mat. Jericho rolls Michaels over for two, but Michaels maintains the headlock. Another two count for Michaels. I wish Gorilla Monsoon was here, so he could tell us that “in all my years, I’ve never seen anyone pinned with a side headlock.” Jericho whips Michaels to the ropes and hits an elbow. Jericho punches away, and chokes Michaels. Backbreaker by Jericho, and a series of elbow drops. Jericho mocks Michaels and goes for the cover and gets two. Jericho continues to slug away on Michaels and throws him to the outside. Jericho suplexes Michaels back in, and tosses Michaels over again, but Michaels hangs on and grabs a headscissors. Jericho goes for a springboard plancha, but Michaels moves and Jericho hits the floor. Springboard body press to the floor by Michaels and both men are down outside the ring. Michaels hits a cross body off the top rope for two. Irish whip by Michaels who goes for a slam, but the two men slug each other in the face instead. Ric Flair is on his way down, and Michaels goes right outside the ring and nails Flair. Back in the ring, Michaels goes for a hurracanrana, but Jericho reverses into the Walls of Jericho. And we go to commercial without any warning.

We’re back and Michaels is on his feet fighting back. He rams Jericho’s head into the corner, and gets on the second rope for punches to the head. Michaels charges, and Jericho back body drops him all the way to the floor. Flair goes over and chokes Michaels. Jericho rams Michaels’s back into the ringpost. Jericho goes up to the top rope and hits a huge back elbow and gets a two count. Michaels with a cross body for two. Jericho up on top, but Michaels hits a dropkick as Jericho is coming down. Michaels hits a backbreaker and fires up. Michaels kips up and hits an inverted atomic drop and knocks Jericho down with a clothesline. Whip to the corner, and Michaels goes for the Walls. He catapults Jericho instead and gets a rollup for two. Northern Lights suplex by Jericho for two. Bulldog by Jericho, goes for the Lionsault but Michaels moves. Jericho hits the Lionsault this time, but only gets two. Another cover by Jericho gets two. Irish whip by Michaels, and Jericho comes out of the corner but gets powerslammed for two. Michaels takes his patented corner bump, and Jericho goes up for a back suplex off the top, which Michaels blocks and knocks Jericho off the top. Michaels goes for the elbow off the top and hits it. The band tunes up, but Jericho ducks, and gives Michaels the ole Greco-Roman kick in the balls. Jericho grabs a chair, but Michaels hits the Sweet Chin Music on the chair, which the referee did not see. Flair pulls the referee out of the ring, and the two argue as randy Orton enters the ring and gives Michaels the RKO. Jericho goes for the cover, but Michaels kicks out. Jericho locks on the Walls again. Michaels begins to fight out, but Jericho pushes his head back against the turnbuckle to reverse the momentum. Awesome. Michaels tries getting to the ropes, but Jericho pulls Michaels back to the middle of the ring, and Michaels taps out. Holy shit.
WINNER – Chris Jericho

We get a replay of tonight’s earlier confrontation between Linda, Steve Austin, and Eric Bischoff.

Lance Storm is in the ring to show his talent to the agents and talent scouts in the audience. He reads a prepared statement, which the cameras cut away from to see Kane’s entrance to the arena.

They show footage of the WWE superstars visit to American soldiers.

Booker T vs. Test, for the Intercontinental Title

Booker hits a spin kick and goes to work with a back elbow and gets a two count. Test pokes Booker in the eye as Christian looks on. Test slugs away. Test whips Booker to the corner, hits a clothesline, then does jumping jacks and pushups. Booker fights back with a side kick for a two-count. Booker misses an axe kick, and Test misses a big boot and Booker makes Test ride the horsey on the top rope. Another two count for Booker. Test hits a big clothesline for two. Test blocks a sunset flip for two. MAIN EVENT SPINEBUSTER and Booker is going for the Spin-a-Roony and Test hits a boot to the face. Steiner is coming out with a chair. Test puts Booker in the camel clutch, as Stacy comes out to peddle her wears in front of Steiner, just to antagonize Test. Test is furious, as Booker rolls him up from behind for two. Booker hits the Book-End for three.
WINNER, and STILL IC CHAMPION – Booker T

Booker does the spin-a-roony for all those in attendance.

The results of the poll are in! 62% said yes, 38% said no.

RVD is warming up.

Then we see a promo for the Triple Threat WWE Title match at Vengeance, the Smackdown-only PPV.

The babyface locker room is discussing Kane. Hurricane tells “young Roosevelt” (Rosey) that he sees a superhero in training in him. Goldust makes the acronym “S.H.I.T.” for Super Hero In Training. Goldust has Tourettes, by the way.

Kane is being escorted to the ring in shackles by police officers for the main event.

We are treated to a video package of Kane’s path of destruction.

Kane vs. Rob Van Dam

RVD charges in and they brawl on the outside of the ring, and RVD hits a moonsault. They continue to brawl outside, as Kane takes advantage. More brawling. Kane is going for a chokeslam RVD off the stage, but WWE officials break it up. RVD with a spin kick, but Kane gets back up and knocks RVD down. Kane tosses RVD into the stage, and then goes after Linda. Johnny Ace and Arn Anderson try to stop Kane, but he tosses them aside. Kane goozles Linda, Lawler tries to stop him, but gets beaten down. Kane assaults more referees. Kane lifts Linda up for the tombstone and gives it to her on the stage. Anderon and Ace request medical attention. Fade to black.

That’s it for this week, make sure to support the underrated PK, who should be back next week.

JZ