411’s ECW on SyFy Report 8.18.09

Welcome to the ECW on SyFy! As always, I am Michael Bauer, your 411 ECW Re-capper.

Josh Matthews and Matt Striker are at ringside and they hype our main event. I just wonder why regal is teaming with Kozlov if he hates foreigners.

Hurricane Helms vs. Paul Burchill

Hurricane has an awesome opening to his video and I marked out in a second. We get highlights of what happened last week after Burchill’s match with Yoshi Tatsu. Burchill doesn’t look amused looking back at it and the bell rings. Helms with an arm drag takedown and poses. Hurricane gets another one, but it backed into the corner and Burchill just pounds away in the corner. Hurricane whipped hard into the corner, but he punches back. Hurricane ducks a clothesline and tries a chokeslam, but he gets kicked in the gut. Burchill runs into a Hurricane Press and Hurricane punches away. Hurricane gets whipped, but he grabs the ropes. Burchill rushes in and gets low bridged to the floor. Hurricane heads up top and dives off with a huge body press to the floor as we go to commercial at 2:00.

Back at 5:10 and Burchill is on control with a grounded headlock. Burchill wrenches back to add pressure as we get a look at how Burchill gained control with desperation. Hurricane is up and he punches out, but gets run over with a huge clothesline. Burchill gets a two count before driving his elbow into the head of Hurricane. Burchill goes to a sleeper hold, but Hurricane is up quickly. Hurricane gets whipped chest first into the turnbuckle and turns right into the double knee strike by Burchill, which nets another two count. Burchill hits a series of crossfaces and goes back to the sleeper. Hurricane up again, but he gets driven into the corner and up the turnbuckle. Burchill tries for the superplex, but Hurricane punches out and head butts him down. Hurricane flies with a huge cross body and connects! Hurricane punches away, but gets whipped into the corner. Burchill runs into an elbow and Hurricane hits an inverted bulldog for a two count. Burchill again into the corner, but he avoids the charge and hits a dropkick to the back of the head for two. Burchill brings Hurricane to the corner, but Hurricane punches out and hits a Hurricarana for two. Hurricane misses the Shining Wizard. Burchill lifts up Hurricane for the Dangerous Buster, but he slips out and connects with the Eye of the Hurricane for the victory at 11:10!

Winner: Hurricane Helms

Match Rating: **3/4 That was a pretty decent match that did nothing wrong.

Backstage, we go to Courtney Taylor, making her debut by interviewing Tommy Dreamer. She says that he is teaming up with Christian tonight and Dreamer says they are friends. Dreamer says he is excited to face someone he doesn’t like and Regal comes in. Regal taps Dreamer on the arms and Kozlov comes out of nowhere to level Dreamer. Kozlov pulls the arms of Dreamer and slams Dreamer face first to the floor. Dreamer looks to be out.

How about that… a “Did You Know?” that doesn’t insult anyone.

Dreamer is still down when we come back and Christian is with him and the trainers. Dreamer is having trouble getting up and we go to the ring…

And it is time for the Abraham Washington show and his cheesy ass “Applause” on the TitanTron. The new King of Late Night TV… yeah, right! Washington says he hears mixed reviews and he says either the people can’t see or can’t read. And being in Kansas City, he is guessing they are illiterate. Yes, we are less than a week from Summerslam and he gets to hang with Jay and Conan, who are upset because his ratings are higher than theirs. He then brings out his guest… Goldust? Ok, this could be somewhat interesting. Goldust takes a seat and Washington calls him one of the strangest people ever as he is a walking, talking Academy Award. Washington then says he has some confrontations with Sheamus over the past few weeks and Goldust starts ticking. Washington asks for an exorcism and tells Goldust to drink some water. Washington thinks Ashton is here and “Punking” him. Goldust says that he was electrocuted over six years ago and that he is on medication. Abraham says that he isn’t taking the meds and he brings out Sheamus as his second guest. Sheamus comes out looking perplexed and chooses not to sit down. Sheamus says Goldust got lucky last week and that lightning doesn’t strike twice. Goldust gets in his face after being called a gold freak and he ticks out again, which backs the Celtic Warrior up. Washington ends the show as they continue to stare down with neither one making a move.

Backstage, Courtney asks Tiffany to give an update on Dreamer. He has a concussion and Christian is being allowed to find a replacement partner for tonight’s main event.

Zack Ryder vs. Yoshi Tatsu

Ok, this should be pretty good if it gets time. I bet it doesn’t. The bell rings and Yoshi gets a quick headlock but it shoved off. Yoshi ducks, leaps, and hits an arm drag. Ryder gets whipped to the corner, but gets the boots up. Ryder goes up top and gets caught, but he drops to the floor and hangs the arm on the top rope. Ryder gets a bodyslam and whips Yoshi to the corner. Yoshi has his arm tied in the ropes before Ryder hits an armbreaker. Yoshi locks in an armbar, but he gets up and is whipped off the ropes. Yoshi spins around and gets an armbar of his own. Yoshi goes to the floor and catches Ryder with a shoulder block. Yoshi flips up and over and hits a series of kicks, backing Ryder into the corner. Yoshi runs in with a knee strike, but gets shoved off before a bulldog can be hit. Ryder tries the Zack Attack, but Yoshi escapes with a sweep. Yoshi hits a rolling senton splash and goes outside. Yoshi springboard in for a senton, but Zack gets the knees up and rolls up Yoshi for the three count at 3:03.

Winner: Zack Ryder

Match Rating: *3/4 Fast paced and in definite need of a few more minutes.

Next week on Raw… Floyd Mayweather is back. This can’t be good.

And then we flashback to last night with the Raw Rebound and the DX Reunion being cut short by Legacy.

Backstage, Christian says he will go out there by himself if he has to. Tiffany won’t allow it and someone comes in. Christian say that will work and we go back to the ring.

William Regal and Vladimir Kozlov vs. Christian and Ezekiel Jackson

Regal seems extra cocky right now in that ring. Regal and Kozlov shake hands as Kozlov enters and I still wodner how this team works when Regal said a few weeks ao that he hates foreigners. Wow, Regal and Kzlov look like a perfect match asthey watch Christian come down the aisle and as we go to a commercial.

We come back and his partner is… BIG ZEKE!!! NO SHIT!!! Regal looks concerned and Kozlov looks like he could care less.Striker hypes up Kozlov facing Jackson as the bell rings and Regal starts with Christian. The lockup and Regal gets backed into the corner, but no clean break. Regal gets a headlock and goes into a hammerlock, before switching to an arm wrench. Christian reverses and takes down Regal. Kozlov tagged in and Christian tags him with punches. Kozlov finally hits a knee to the gut and lifts up Christian, but Christian finally slips out and Christian low bridges him. Christian hits a dropkick to keep Kozlov on the floor. Regal with a distraction and Kozlov from behind with a huge forearm. Christian bounces off the ropes and Regal with a cheap shot before Kozlov knocks him to the floor. Kozlov with a shot to the gut and he follows with hard shoulders. Christian locked in a reverse headlock and nearly gets a tag, but Kozlov goes to the ground to stop that. Christian backed into the corner and Regal tagged in. Regal with a series of lefts, but Christian somehow gets a backslide for two. Christian whipped into the corner, but he gets the boots up twice and hits the sunset flip for two. Kozlov tries to get involved, but Jackson cuts him off at the pass. Jackson backs up and then levels Christian with his power slam. Jackson then stares down as Regal gets the pinfall at 5:30. After the bell, Kozlov lays out Christian with the Iron Curtain and Jackson again drills Christian with his finisher as Regal rasise sthe hands of both men to end the broadcast.

Winners: William Regal and Vladimir Kozlov

Match Rating: *1/2 This wasn’t that good and it makes more questions than answers.