411’s WWE Smackdown Report 04.09.10

Hello, everyone! I’m Michael Uphoff, returning to reviewing Smackdown after being gone last week, helping the family. We’ve got what seems to be a good show tonight, so let’s get to it! Smackdown comes tonight from Chicago, Illinois. I do believe CM Punk is from there, although I might be wrong about that.

A recap of what happened last Friday is shown, where Edge speared Jericho, and then Swagger appeared, decked Edge with the briefcase, cashed in his MITB shot, and Doctor Bombed Chris Jericho to become the new World Heavyweight Champion! Good for him. Hope they actually push him.

Tony Chimel asks us to welcome the new World Heavyweight Champion, Jack Swagger! He walks to the ring to a chorus of mild boos. Grisham and Striker put over the match later tonight between Edge and Jericho, with the winner being the #1 contender to Swagger’s title at Extreme Rules. Swagger grabs a mic and gets booed. He says last week he shocked the world by cashing in his MITB briefcase and becoming the new World Heavyweight Championship. Later tonight, Edge and Jericho will fight to determine who is the #1 contender to MY title. Honestly, it doesn’t matter. Because no matter who my opponent is, whether it be Edge or Jericho, I am the odds-on favorite to walk out of Extreme Rules with this championship still around my waist. As you can see, I’m a changed man for the better in every conceivable way. Being champion suits me. Some people’s championships come easy, and some are born to be champions. I’m one of them. You can boo me all you want, but there isn’t a WWE superstar that can stop my momentum. And since Shawn Michaels’ career is over, he thinks that he should be considered the greatest natural competitor in the WWE. He tells the crowd, “I deserve to be champion!” Huge boos for that.

John Morrison’s music hits, and out comes the Friday Night Delight! He does his slow-motion entrance. Morrison grabs himself a mic and says “deserve to be a champion? You got lucky one night. That makes you a titleholder, not a champion. In fact, you didn’t look like much of a champion on last Monday Night RAW. Roll it!” Footage is then shown of Swagger falling victim to the RKO and losing his final match on RAW to Randy Orton. “Ouch”- says Morrison. “You don’t really look like a champion. You don’t look like you’ve changed at all. You look like the same man to me. Same stupid haircut, same stupid nickname, same stupid speech impediment.” Crowd popped for that one. “I don’t have a speech impediment!”-Swagger. They argue a little, and Morrison says he crossed the line on that one. Swagger says that Morrison is the one that hasn’t changed. Swagger’s the champ, and Morrison is living in the shadow of the Miz. NICE. Morrison is bitter and jealous because his career will never rival Swagger’s. Morrison says he may be right, but at least I don’t have a speech impediment. Swagger rushes Morrison, but gets tossed.

Jack Swagger vs. John Morrison

Morrison with some rights to start, and backs Swagger into a corner. He lands some mounted punches, but gets shoved off. Morrison comes back with a flurry, Swagger reverses an Irish whip, Morrison slides under Swagger, and hits a nice dropkick for 2. Swagger backs Morrison into the corner, and hits some corner offense. Irish whip countered by Morrison, but Swagger grabs him coming off the ropes and hits a tilt-a-whirl powerslam! NICE. Swagger grabs a reverse bearhug and rolls Morrison around the mat. He transitions to a front ground headlock. Did I just hear Striker compare Swagger and Gary Busey? Morrison fights to his feet, but gets clobbered down again. Irish whip, Morrison ducks under two clothesline attempts, but gets hit with a knee to the gut. The match gets stopped because apparently there is some blood loss, and when we start again, Swagger stomps Morrison’s gut. Striker calls Grisham Tosh.0. That doesn’t work, because Tosh.0 is actually funny. Swagger grabs a headlock cravat and powers Morrison over his head to the mat. That gets 2. Corner shoulders by Swagger, and he pounds Morrison some more. Snapmare into a sleeper with scissors, then a bodyscissors. Morrison fights out, but gets pounded in the corner again. Swagger sets him up top, and Morrison knocks him off, but Swagger hits a top rope armdrag, like Angle used to do. That gets a close 2! Swagger goes for the Vader Bomb, but eats knees! Morrison with a flurry and shoulderblocks, Irish whip and a leg lariat gets 2! Irish whip countered, CHUCK KICK! 1…2…NO! Grisham says that Morrison has won many matches with that move. NAME ONE. Palace of Wisdom countered, Swagger hangs Morrison out to dry on the top rope! He calls for the Doctor Bomb, but Morrison counters and rolls off. Looks like they botched that. Irish whip, victory roll by Morrison! That gets a CLOSE 2! Irish whip, Shining Wizard by Morrison! STARSHIP PAIN! Swagger rolls out of the ring, and Morrison lands on his feet and follows. Morrison fakes a couple moves, so Swagger clips his leg on the apron. Swagger rolls Morrison into the ring, and goes for the Doctor Bomb! 1…2…3!

Winner: Jack Swagger via Doctor Bomb- Good match for what it was, but the botch near the end hurt the match. It was a solid effort by both men. ***

Swagger celebrates.

Tonight, CM Punk converts his NXT rookie Darren Young into the Straight Edge Society. I’m overjoyed.
Also, Edge and Jericho face each other for the #1 contendership tonight.

Chris Jericho is backstage talking to Wade Barrett, saying that he is mad over his loss of the title, but also that Barrett is not the #1 NXT rookie. Jericho says that he should still be the champion, and Swagger comes in and interrupts saying,” Did you see that? Did you see that? That is what a champion looks like. I’m pulling for you tonight, Chris. I really am. The only reason why I cashed in on you instead of Cena is that you were hurt. You were a sure thing.” A sure thing, asks Jericho. I should still be champion. You won fair and square, and you can walk around all you want in your suit and your stern look, but it doesn’t make you Chris Jericho. It doesn’t make you a world champion. Yeah, says Swagger, I understand. THIS makes me the world champion, as he smacks the title belt.

Cryme Tyme’s music hits, and Shad Gaspard comes out to some nice heat. He gets a mic and shows footage of him losing, then snapping and taking out JTG. He says that some people are like him and have someone in their way. All of you need to be like me! Take what you deserve, and don’t let people like JTG stand in your way. This is MY TYME! This is Shad Gaspard’s TYME. JTG hits the ring and goes after Shad, but gets nailed with a big boot on the outside. That didn’t work out so well.

Drew McIntyre’s music hits, and he makes his way to the ring, and the crowd wakes up.

Drew McIntyre vs. Matt Hardy

Drew grabs a mic and says I’m not going to waste my breath on you people. OUCH. Crowd pops huge for Hardy as he makes his way to the ring.

The bell rings, and Hardy and Drew exchange rights with Hardy winning the exchange and backing Drew into the corner. Drew battles out and hits a clubbing lariat, but Hardy takes him down and hits some mounted punches. Hardy lands some more blows, and Drew kicks the knee to get away. McIntyre stomps Hardy and lands some rights. Irish whip to the turnbuckle countered by Hardy with a boot, and hits a leaping clothesline off the second rope! That gets 2! Hardy locks a choke on Drew in the ropes and breaks on four. Hardy hits a falling neckbreaker on Drew for a 2 count. Matt clotheslines both men over the top rope. Commercial!

Back from commercial, Drew has an armbar and a sort of cravat locked in on Hardy. Have you noticed that the heels are always dominating back from commercial? Never the faces. I digress. During the commercial break, Drew ran Hardy into the barricade. Oh, you devilish heel, you. Drew transitions to the Ortonlock, but Hardy fights out with some rights and a jawbreaker. They exchange blows until Hardy gets back suplexed into the turnbuckle for a long 2! Hardy driven into the turnbuckle, and eats a corner lariat. Drew CLOBBERS Hardy with a short-arm lariat, Bradshaw-style. Face stomp gets 2. Ortonlock AGAIN by Drew. The ref checks Hardy and Drew nails him with rights, but eats a Side Effect for 2! Another Side Effect! 2nd Rope Legdrop! 1…2…NO! Hardy calls for the Twist of Fate, and Drew counters to the Future Shock, but Hardy backdrops out of it! Hardy went for the corner clothesline but eats an elbow from Drew. Hardy with a clothesline! He boots Drew out of the ring! Hardy hits the jumping elbow from the apron to Drew! Hardy lands shot after shot, but Drew throws Hardy into the apron! FUTURE SHOCK on the floor! Drew rolls in Hardy. 1…2…3!

Winner: Drew McIntyre via Future Shock- Slow to start, but REALLY picked up as it got going. Great work by both men. This may be Drew’s best match to date. ***

Apparently someone is joining the SES tonight, which means someone will get their head shaved. It’s Darren Young. Why? He’s got AWESOME hair.

A recap shows Punk’s promo last week in which he put up his hair for a match with Rey at Extreme Rules.

CM Punk’s music hits, and he gets quite a few cheers from the hometown crowd. Grisham says that Punk is putting his hair on the line at Extreme Rules. “You suck”- Chicago, with some cheers in there. Serena calls everyone sinners and addicts. Just living pathetic lives. If you would just allow yourselves to find straight edge through this man, this angel, CM Punk, then all of you, just like me, could take your meaningless and worthless lives and make them better. Punk says something to Gallows, who says that the moment of cleansing is worth a lifetime of pain. When I realized that straight edge was my destiny in and through CM Punk, I was saved. Punk gets a mic and says there was a time where Serena and Luke were just like everyone here. But I came along, and then their lives changed. I saved them. They stand above all in the SES. But there was a time that he would gaze into Luke’s eyes and Serena’s eyes and would see loneliness and despair, just like I see in the audience. Just like I see in Darren Young. Punk can save him from despair and loneliness and help him on NXT. Tonight, he has a choice. Young sits in the chair. Punk says that he will take away his pain if he accepts straight edge into his heart. No more drinking, no more smoking, no more late-night partying. Isn’t that called marriage? He will not be a loser anymore. Are you ready to accept straight edge? Raise your right hand. Darren, are you ready to accept me as your savior? Darren looks like he might say yes, but lowers his hand and stands up. Young says he’s changed his mind. “Who do you think you are?”-Punk. Punk gets SHOVED down by Young, who gets attacked from behind by Gallows. They triple team him, and Punk goes to shave Young, but REY MYSTERIO is out! Rey makes the save. Rey grabs the razor, but Serena saves Punk just in time. Rey grabs a mic and says last week, you offered to sacrifice your hair at Extreme Rules if I beat you. I accept! But I’m not just going to beat you, I’m going to shave that head of yours and end the Straight Edge Society. Because you’re one move away from the 6! 1! 9! Punk and Rey stare each other down.

Another promo for Edge vs. Jericho for the #1 contendership is shown for tonight.

Trent Beretta and Caylen Croft vs. The Hart Dynasty

Striker works in a great Airplane reference. They introduce themselves as the Dudebusters. They talk about themselves, and I keep losing interest as they keep talking. HUGE pop for the music, and for the Hart Dynasty. A sneak peek of the Hart DVD is shown.

The bell rings. Kidd and Croft to start. We also get an Excalibur reference from Grisham. Greatness. They lock up and Kidd droptoeholds Croft and grabs a ground headlock. Irish whip counter by Croft, who receives a shoulderblock in return from Kidd. Off the ropes goes Kidd, some counters, and Kidd hits a suplex. Croft rolls to the apron, and counters Kidd. He goes for a springboard victory roll, but Kidd counters that to a Sharpshooter attempt! Kidd gets shoved through the ropes with an assist from Beretta. Beretta then goes after Kidd and hits him with a clothesline. Back in, Croft covers for 2. Croft hits a front suplex on Kidd and tags in Beretta. Beretta hits a springboard elbow drop to the back of Kidd. He gets 2. Tyson makes it to his feet and tries for a tag, but Beretta back suplexes him back down. That gets 2. Corner knees from Beretta. Kidd catapults Beretta into the turnbuckle and makes the tag to Smith! Irish whip, followed by a back elbow, and a clothesline, and a huge shoulderblock! They go for the springboard Hart Attack, Croft in, and Kidd missile dropkicks Croft! Irish whip into the corner, Beretta dodges, Beretta goes for a tornado DDT, but Smith hangs on to him and hits a HUGE spinebuster and locks in the Sharpshooter! Beretta taps!

Winner: The Hart Dynasty via Sharpshooter- Good tag match, although it felt a little short. Beretta and Croft don’t impress me much, although they are a capable tag team. **

Backstage, Josh Matthews introduces Dolph Ziggler. Josh asks him how it felt to put the Great Khali to sleep. Dolph responds, “How does it feel?” and then locks Matthews in a sleeper hold. O-kay.

Grisham and Striker pimp the #1 contender match again. They also say how well David Otunga, Mr. A-list, did hosting Monday Night RAW. The RAW Rebound shows him cutting a promo and then making a match for the tag titles, Otunga walking out on Cena, and Batista destroying Cena again. They have a Last Man Standing match at Extreme Rules for the WWE Championship. Also shown is Punk vs. Rey, where if Punk loses, he gets his head shaved, and Swagger vs. whoever wins tonight’s match.

In the back, we see Edge preparing for his match in his locker room. Swagger comes in and calls him the Rated R Superstar. He wishes him luck and says he’s pulling for him tonight. Maybe he’ll have more success tonight then he did at Wrestlemania. If it’s Edge at Extreme Rules, Swagger is going to do what Jericho couldn’t and put Edge back on IR. Edge doesn’t buy the nice-guy act and tells him that he’ll win tonight and at Extreme Rules, he’ll beat him with the spear! Great line by Swagger still denying his speech impediment.

Chris Jericho vs. Edge for the #1 Contendership at Extreme Rules

Jericho makes his way out to the ring to solid heat, still sporting the taped ribs. Yay for continuity. Edge comes out to huge cheers. Kudos to Grisham for mentioning four years ago that Edge won at Wrestlemania 22 in this very building.

The bell rings, and they lock up. Jericho grabs a side headlock, and off the ropes, Jericho hits a shoulderblock, and then Edge throws Jericho over the top rope. Commercial.

Back from commercial, Jericho charges, and Edge droptoeholds him into the middle rope. Edge hits a running crossbody onto Jericho! Brilliant use of psychology there. That gets 2. Jericho gets whipped hard into the turnbuckle by Edge. Edge locks Jericho in an inverse bow and arrow with the ringpost. Edge kicks Jericho in the ribs and hits some rights, but gets tossed by Jericho. Jericho with the springboard dropkick! I love that move. Jericho hangs Edge on the bottom rope. Back suplex by Jericho gets 2. Stomps to the haed of Edge, and he gets choked in the ropes by Jericho. Rights by Jericho in the corner, and Edge fights back with some of his own. Off the ropes, Jericho hits a clothesline for 2. Snapmare into a rear chinlock. Edge fights out but gets hit with a back elbow. Edge slides to the apron, counters Jericho, goes for a springboard victory roll, but Jericho grabs the legs and counters for 2! Edge counters for 2! Jericho boots him in the face. Baseball slide by Jericho sends Edge out of the ring. Commercial again.

Back again, Jericho lays some rights on Edge and trash talks him. He tosses Edge out of the ring, and then lounges on top of the turnbuckle. Jericho goes back to work on Edge with some corner offense. Snapmare into a modified sleeper hold. Edge fights to his feet and out of it with rights. Irish whip by Edge countered with a boot from Jericho, and Edge lands a shot to the ribs of Jericho as he comes off the 2nd rope! Clothesline by Edge, off the ropes, flapjack by Edge! EDGECUTION DDT! 1…2…NO! Bulldog by Jericho, Lionsault countered with knees by Edge, but Jericho grabs the knees and locks in the Walls of Jericho! Edge makes the ropes. Big boot by Edge! 1…2…NO! Edgecution DDT try again, countered to the Walls! Edge counters that to a small package! 1…2…NO! CODEBREAKER BY JERICHO! Edge rolls out of the ring to save himself. Jericho goes out after him and rolls him back in the ring and covers. 1..2…2.887! Jericho talks more trash, Edgecution DDT! Edge gets that look on his face and sets for the spear. HE goes for the spear, but Jericho leapfrogs and gets out of the ring! Jericho is thrown in the barricade! They head into the crowd and get counted out. They brawl through the crowd and outside the ring after the match. Jericho grabs a chair and goes to hit Edge, but gets a SPEAR!

Winner: Double Countout- This was a good match between the two, non-finish aside. I think the non-finish was the way to go, and a triple threat match may be brewing at Extreme Rules. I hope Swagger retains. Great effort form both men, but a step below their Wrestlemania match. ***1/2

FINAL THOUGHTS: This was a great show, and the perfect way to build for Extreme Rules. Great show all around. Once again, the Blue Brand dominates, showing RAW how it’s done. Definite thumbs up.