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Acero’s AEW Dynamite Review 5.10.23
Image Credit: AEW
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I may be SUPER late to the party, but that TV Show Succession is pretty bad ass…
It’s Wednesday, you know what that means…
Good God Almighty, we are starting off HOT!
Double Jeopardy Match
Claudio Castagnoli vs Rey Fenix
Whichever person wins gets a title shot against the loser.
We get some back and forth before Claudio slows things down with a gutwrench. He tries to shoulder Rey, but Rey flies off with an arm drag. He springboards into the clutches of Claudio, Rey escapes, gets shoved to the corner, kicks out, and Claudio with a tilt-a-whirl! Cover for 1..2.NO!!! Rey to the corner, high kick. Another. Rey to the apron, Claudio stops him from climbing so Rey hits some rights. Springboard, to the 2nd buckle, back to the top, diving rana and lands on his feet! Damn! Claudio to the outside. SUICIDE DIVE FROM REY!!! ANOTHER!!! Rey with a third, but Claudio CATCHES HIM IN A PRESS!!! Good golly! He drops Rey on the barricade chest first. Claudio tries for a suplex, but Rey knees the top of the dome. Rey gets dumped to the apron, hits Claudio with a elbow to the back of the head then walks the barricade to hit a rana!
Both men back in the ring. Claudio drops Rey with a suplex. Cover for 1..2.NO!!! Claudio with a fireman’s. He heads to the corner and walks up with Rey on his shoulders. Claudio on the 2nd rope, presses Rey up, Rey elbows out, lands on the apron. Springboard. RANA! Rey tries for a Code Red, Claudio holds on, flips Rey forward, then hits a huge clothesline! Cover for 1..2.NO!!! Rey rolls to the outside. Claudio follows. Uppercut on the outside. Fireman’s to Rey. Claudio presses Rey into the air and sends him flying into the crowd.
We are BACK from a commercial, and Rey is being sent over the apron. He lands on his fet, chop to Claudio. Rey climbs the corner, Claudio hits a big uppercut then gutwrench tosses Rey off the top rope! Cover for 1..2..NO!!!! Claudio lifts Rey by the chin, so Rey chops him. Claudio with a love tap, asking for another chop. Rey hits one, uppercut to Rey,chop to Claudio, knee to Rey, hits the ropes, hook kick misses, but Rey hits a superkick!!! Another big kick from Rey. He rolls and hits a CUTTER!! Claudio to the outside. Rey hops to the top rope and flies with a beautiful moonsault! Rey sends Claudio into the ring. He hops ot the apron, flies off the top and Claudio hits a huge uppercut! He lifts Claudio, Ric—NO!!! CODE RED TO CLAUDIO!!!! 1….2…..NO!!!! Claudio with an uppercut, hook kick from Rey sends Claudio to the ropes, he rebounds with a lariat, but Rey ducks under, and gets a kick right under the chin!!! Cover to Claudio! 1…2…..NO!!! Rey lifts Claudio, gets him to the shoulders, struggling as he does it. Claudio drops down, torture rack driver! Cover!!! 1……2……NO!!!!
Claudio pulls Rey into the center of the ring! Elbows to the chest over and over and over again!!! Straight jacket, into a Ricola Bomb! Cover! 1…2…3!!!
Winner: Claudio Castagnoli
BRIIIIIIISSSSSCOOOOOEEEEEEE!!!!!!!! That shit was bonkers!
Total Rating: ****
Match Time: 14:28
Backstage, we see some sexy calves walking towards us. Renee stops the calves as we see they belong to Miro. She asks what brings him back, and he says nothing. Instead, enters the office of Tony Khan.
MJF wants to talk about the pillars. He says thes four mens came out of nowhere. Sammy is Ringo, talented and stupid. Jungle Boy is the definite George while Darby is Lennon, then there’s MJF. Paul. The best. The person that will have the most longevity, and the gap between him and the three of them has only gotten bigger and bigger. He is begging them to step up to the plate. He has accomplished so much. Moxley, Punk, Jericho, Rhodes, Danielson. What have they done? He was in the best matches, he will be in the best Four Way in the history of pro-wrestling. Every great moment in this sport has one thing in common – him. His reign of terror has just begun.
FTR are here!!! They want to talk to Mark Briscoe, but instead come out Jay Lethal, Jeff Jarrett, Sonjay Dutt, and Satnam Singh. Dutt says FTR has one job – accept the challenge. He is asking again, do they accept at Double or Nothing? Dax asks us if we want them to accept. No, definitely not. He has an idea, though. He will accept if they admit to using Mark Briscoe.
Dut takes offense, Lethal removes his shirt. Dutt calls Briscoe their friend.
Mark Briscoe comes out with a bttle of Titos and some cups. He tells everyone to chill out and relax. It’s becoming abudnatly apparent to him that they all have a hard time holding in their emotions when they are in the vicinity. He has some news. At Double or Nothing, titles on the line, FTR vs Jay Lethal and Jeff Jarrett, and Briscoe will be the special guest referee.
He offers Jay the stack of cups and tells him to pass them around. Everyone takes some in a cup until Dutt tosses his into Dax’s face. Dax cant see, he’s got American Vodka in his eyes! Jarrett shoves Briscoe! He runs into Dax, and Dax – blind – hits Briscoe with a powerbomb.
Lol. Kinda dumb…kinda unnecessary. Still funny.
Dax realizes what happened and checks on Mark as we switch gears to cover what happened last week with Jericho, Britt, and Cole.
Backstage, Renee is with Chris Jericho who wonders how Jericho feels about the attack last week.
Jericho wonders why she says this with such glee. Lol. He says Cole created an unsafe work environment and is a coward. Jericho has legal counsel and has a court order. If Jericho is in the building, Cole is banned, not allowed inside.
Here comes Roderick Strong to call Jericho delusional. Cole is one of his best friends, and he is no coward. Cole may be banned, but he’s not. So how bout Strong vs Jericho in a fight, Falls Count Anywhere.
Jericho understands Roderick standing up for his friend; it’s a good quality, but if he wants to make a name for himself against Jericho, he’ll knock Strong’s teeth down his throat. So he’ll have the fight next week. Don’t’ forget, though, because Jericho has a whole army behind him.
Strong knew he’d say that, so he got legal counsel, and The JAS is also bound from the building.
A quick look at commentary, then backstage with Renee yet again. She is in front of Tony Khan’s office, waiting for a word from Miro.
Here comes Thunder Rosa of all people, saying tonight seems like a good night to talk to Papi Khan.
Video package for Sammy Guevara. It really leans into a face character.
We head backstage where Tony Khan is standing by. He calls tonight’s card one of the best they’ve had. In addition to all of this, there are literally stars lined up to be a part of AEW. He wants us to stay tuned to TNT next Wednesday for a huge announcement.
AEW International Championship Match
Orange Cassidy vs Daniel Garcia
After a nice FRESHLY SQUEEZED chant, Orange shocks Garcia by floating behind him, locking the waist, and taking him down hard. Garcia is able to get out, reverse, and drop OC, then slaps his head a little bit before he dances. Garcia tries to mock the pockets, Orange grabs his hgands and says no, then locks in a side headlock. To the ropes. OC stops, backs up, side headlock again. Arm drag from OC. Transition from Garcia. OC tries to kip up, cant, too sloth. He tricks Garcia, is able to get the arms. OC hits the ropes, drop toe hold attempt from Garcia, but Orange stops the fall! He stands, puts his hands in the pockets then twists his foot to escape! To the ropes, ducks under, dropkick! Another! To the apron! Garcia gets caught, OC puts his head into the buckle. He tries again, but Garcia grabs the injured hand and pulls the fingers apart. He drops OC down. OC shoves Garcia into the barricade, gets into the ring, suicide dive to Garcia! He sends Garcia into the ring, OC favors his knee a bit. To the top rope, dives with a lariat! Hits the ropes, ducks under, Garcia with a right hand drops OC to the mat. Garcia sends OC int othe corner upside down. OC rolls outside ,favoring his back. Garcia follows. He locks the hips and drops OC down onto his back.
We are back in time to see Garcia dance like a Bella in WWE 2k10.
Oc elbows Garcia from the top rope to the back over and over. Right hand to Garcia is blocked hard. He locks the face, pulls orange up and hits a Superplex! Rollsthrough into a ……noooo OC hits a sloppy Stundog Millionaire. Both men up in the center. Right hands from each other. Oc with the forarms, Garcia with the punches. Oc with some elbow strikes, looks for a big punch, but Garcia kicks the knee cap. He then stomps the right hand. Garcia puts OCs hands in his own pockets then tries for a piledriver, only for OC to reverse with a Beach Break! Cover! 1..2..NO!! Garcia says he is going to end this. He does the soft kicks, mocking Orange to the boos of the crowd. OC up to his knees, holds his hands out for Garcia to stop, tries the pocket thing but Garcia captures the wrists and kicks OC then hits a jumping piledriver! Cover! 1…2…NO!!! Garcia grabs the legs, OC with a cradle! HUGE right to the face of Garcia! BEACH BREAK AGAIN! He doesn’t hook the head. Cover for 1..2..NO!!!! Dragon Tamer from Garcia!!! Orange crawls to the ropes, nearly reaches them! Garcia stops him! Pulls to the center, tugs on the foot. OC screams, Garcia transitions into a triangle. OC Up, Garcia kicks the leg out and OC falls into a Crossface! Garcia stomps the right hand over and over! OC reverses into a pin for 1..2.NO!!!
Garcia moves momentum for a pin of his own! 1..2..NO!! Orange escapes, stands rolls onto the back of Garcia and locks in the mousetrap! 1…2….3!!!!
Winner: Orange Cassidy
Good God Almighty, Orange Cassidy is the best in the world.
Total Rating: *****
Match Time: 13:34
Christian Cage and his pet dinosaur comes out to the ring with Tony Schiavone. Tony asks how Cage put himself into a title match.
Christian calls Detroit literally the worst city in the country, so keep quiet. Why is he the number one contender? Simple: he is Christian Cage.
Crowd is shitting ALLLLL OVER HIM. Nice.
He says he walked into the boss’s office and got the shot. When your name has the cache that his does, you get the shot. He has a question for Tony. What’s with all these wrestlers and their daddy issues? It’s simple – much like Jungle Boy, Wardow’s got some daddy issues. Let’s face it, though, Wardlow’s dad wasn’t famous and no one cares about him. But he found Arn, a father figure, good job. Cuz Arn was looking for a new son himself. Arn’s son, Brock, is a wrestler here, and Cage will go out on a limb and say Arn is a liar. Last thing he wanted to do was to set Brock up for success until he saw Wardlow with his new title. He tossed Brock to the side, hop over to Wardlow, and took all that credit. I guess being Ric Flair’s lapdog for years makes you a legend. How many times has Arn won the big one? Oh yeah, none. Cage is a multi-time champion. Unlike Arn, he understand what it takes. What will Wardlow do when he realizes his legend is not as smart and cunning as Cage. Next week, Wardlow will be in this ring, and Cage will walk down and spit in his face and Wardlow will realize his days as TNT Champion are all but over.
He then tells Detroit to kiss his ass.
Man, that promo was rough, but the crowd absolutely HAAAAATED Christian, so it doesn’t even matter. Kudos, Cage. Kudos.
A Darby Allin video package justifies his insanity.
No Holds Barred
Julia Hart vs Anna Jay
As Hart makes her entrance, Anna Jay attacks from behind with a chair. She tosses Hart into the ring as the bell sounds, then follows. Hart kicks her hard, then sends her outside. Hart sends Jay into the barricade once, twice, and one more itme. Hart lifts the apron, grabs a kendo stick, and readies her attack. One shot to the abs, then to the back. Jay enters the ring quickly, Hart follows. Jay takes the stick from her. One for the stomach, then the back. She sends Hart outside. Hart follows, grabs Hart and hits a suplex on the outside.
We are back and Anna Jay is dropping Hart onto a bunch of chairs on the outside. She rolls Hart into the ring and covers for 1..2…NO!! Jay puts a trash can in the corner then sends Hart into it and kicks hard. Cover for 1..2.NO!!! Jay leaves the ring and grabs a chair. She tosses it into the ring, grabs another, and another. We got about five chairs in the ring now. Jay piles the chairs up a bit, then grabs hart and locks the head. She tries for a suplex, Hart counters, hits an elbow, another elbow.
Hart sits Jay up on the corner. To the top. Locks the head, SUPERPPLEX TO JAY! She hardly hits the chairs, so Hart opts to lock in The Hartless. Anna Jay taps.
Winner: Julia Hart
I’ll give the ladies props for doing something they are most likely not used to doing and attempting to grow, but it was somewhat uneventful.
Total Rating: **
Match Time: 9:16
Backstage, Renee is with The Best Friends, Orange Cassidy, and Bandido. OC is hurtin. Trent Baretta says tonight is the night, the night “Best Amigos” win the big one!
Renee asks what their rule is.
OC says ohhh it’s a big one. Tell em, Chuck.
Chuck Taylor says he doesn’t have a rule. He didn’t know he was supposed to choose one.
Trent bans all witches from ringside.
Well, shit.
Orange is left alone with Renee who asks if he has any last words. OC says he is so tired, Renee. So so tired. Renee is also tired.
AEW Trios Championsip Match
House of Black vs The Best Friends and Bandido
WE have all the lights out except for those cascading the ring. Bandido and Black to start. Step up rana from Bandido, snapmare from Black, Bandido lands on his feet, kick to the gut, hits the ropes, high knee from Black. He corners Bandido and hits a hih kick, a knee, Bandido floats over out the corner, tries for a German, switch by Black, back elbow. Black hooks the back of the knee, pulling Bandido forward, then kicks him down hard. Knee bar from Black. Bandido makes it to the ropes, but the ref tells him there is no break. Bandido pulls himself out of the ring with the ropes. Trent distracts, Bandido comes in, kicks Black, tags in Chuck, who tags in Trent. Whip to Black, and we get a double back elbow, then tosses Black into Bandido who drops him on his face with the help of Trent and Chuck. Elbow drop from Chuck and Trent! Trent suplex attempt, BBlack lands on his feet, Brody gets a blind tag, rollup from Trent, Brody comes in, Trent hit a right hand. Knee bar from Black and Brody dives with a senton onto Trent!
We are BACK and Trent is hitting Brody with a dropkick to the chest. Buddy is the legal man. He kicks the faces off the apron and turns into a tornado DDT from Trent. He tries to tag, but no one is there! Trent stands in the corner, Buddy misses a splash, kick from Trent. Cover for 1..2.NO!!! Buddy tries for a rollup, gets a 1..2.NO!! Tries for a stomp, Trent moves, stomps the chest of Buddy. Trent shoots for a tag, gets it! Bandido spins off the top rope onto Buddy! Kick to Black! Brody in! Crucifix Bomb to Brody!!! Brody rolls out, Bandido hits the ropes and dives over the top rope onto Brody and Malakai! Bandido to the apron, Buddy misses a splasah again, kick from Bandido, springboard, but Buddy with a huge kick stuffs him midair. Chuck is on the apron! Tag! Buddy has no one to tag! High knee from Chuck! Lockup, ripcord, Sole Food! Brody with a blind tag!
Knee strike from Buddy, hooks the head ,tosses to Brody, Brody with Dante’s Inferno! Cover! 1…2…3!!!
Winners: House of Black
The lighting will be a bit divisive, but I kinda don’t mind and hope they stick to their guns. The match was a lot in a little bit of time.
Total Rating: ***1/2
Match Time: 8:12
Backstage, Orange Cassidy has been watching for a while, so we check on him one last time and he is laid out with one Kyle Fletcher standing above him holding a bunch of belts. He wants Orange’s, and he wants it now.
Jungle Boy video package.
We start this bad boy outside the ring as Mox and Omega meet up at the bottom of the ramp. As they go around the corner, Yuta and Castagnoli attack Omega. Here comes The Young Bucks! Superkick to Claudio! They send Yuta flying off the stage! The Bucks head towards commentary where Daniel Bryan is. Bryan goads them in long enough for Claudio to attack with uppercuts! Claudio sends Matt off the stage. Yuta and Claudio attack Matt as Nick tries to corner Bryna. Bryan tells him to pay closer attention to what’s going on over by the stage. Nick gets a running start and flies off the ramp onto everyone below. Security comes up to stop the raucous.
Omega is in the ring, surrounded by the cage. Moxley is standing outside. Omega calls him in. Moxley enters the ring and we start the match, officially.
Steel Cage Match
Jon Moxley vs Kenny Omega
Chop battle to start. It turns into some fisticuffs. Death Valley Driver from Omega! Omega to the top rope! Flies off! Cover for 1….2.NO!!! Omega digs under the ring and grabs a chair that’s wrapped in barbed wire. Omega readies it, Jon with akick, hits the ropes, and Omega tosses the chair into the face of Jon!!! Here comes the blood! Omega grabs the chair again, and smacks Moxley with it on the back. He steps on the chair, which is on the back, and grinds it into the back of Jon. HUGE STOMP TO THE CHAIR!! Good god, we see the back starting to bead blood. Omega sends Jon into the corner over and over face first. Elbows from Jon, he grabs th camera and sends Omega into it! Jon grabs the camera and gives it a kiss. He pulls Omega up on the apron, high kick from Jon. Springboard, but Jon shoves Omega INTO THE CAGE! SICK!
Jon grabs the chiar, and we are going tit for tat. Jon tosses Omega into the ropes, Omega dropkicks! Hits the ropes, hops over the head, and hits a bulldog into the chair!!! Omega grabs the chair again! He rolls Jon into his clutches, and hits a body slam onto the chair. Omega to the top rope! Jon meets him with a right. Locks the head. SUPERPLEX ONTO THE CHAIR!!
I typically don’t cover PIP, but Moxley has removed the turnbuckles completely off of two corners and steps on Omega’s hand ONTO the buckle. He then places the hook of said buckle into the mouth of Omega. He pulls at the cheek with a sick face, and the crowd is LOVING it. Bryan is smiling on commentary. Jon swings the buckle onto the back of Omega, which is just dripping in blood. Jon wraps a rope around Omega’s neck and pulls back on it, choking Omega. Omega puts his thumbs into the eyes of Jon to break the hold. Drop toe hold from Omega and he continues to choke Omega up with the rope. Crossface using the rope! Knee to the chin from Jon. He crawls to the corner and reaches for something under the ring. It’s black bag. Jon empties it out, and we see broken shards of glass. Omega is here to punch, chop, Jon hook the leg, Omega elbows out, hooks the leg, drops Jon onto his knee! Running high knee from Omega! He sits Jon on the top of his shoulders, tries for One-Winged Angel, but Jon slinks down to lock in a Sleeper!!! Omega fades! Walks in front of the glass and just FALLS BACK ONTO THE GLASS!!! Moxley hops up and locks a sleeper in!!!! Omega bridges into a pin for 1..2..NO!!! Jon kicks out and Omega rolls away. Jon tries for a piledriver, but Omega escapes and hits a V-Trigger!!!!
Both men up after some time. They trade slaps directly to the face. Over and over. Damn. Omega landing hard ones, duck under, dounle eunderhook, elbow from Jon, running with a knee, Jon eats it, runs for a lariat, Omega with another knee!!! SNAPDRAGON SUPLEX ONTO THE GLASS!!! Jon pulls himself up on the outside apron. Omega runs…..V-TRIGGER AND THE CAGE BREAKS!!!! Jon falls to the outside! Omega is left landing on a beam, his left leg stopping gim from falling completely.
Jon beats his face as Omega favors his knee. Jon stands up, tosses Omega back in the ring. Jon grabs a screwdriver from a crewman and pushes him aside. Jon enters the ring, screwdriver in hand, holding it like hes Lord Voldemort. He points it towards Omega. In comes Don Callis! He distracts! Knee to Jon from behind! V-Trigger to Jon! One-Winged Angel!!! Cover for 1..2…..
NO!!!! DON CALLIS WITH THE SCREWDRIVER!!!! Jon Moxley covers! 1…..2….3!!!
Winner: Jon Moxley
Man, that was brutal. Don’s turn has been comin for a while, although it seemed a bit anti-climactic after all the brutality we just saw. Still, these guys put on a great main event.
Total Rating: ***1/2
Match Time: 14:45
After the match, we hear Bryan Danielson claim that he has no idea why Don has done this, but he’s happy he has.
Don looks to stab Omega in the forehead again, but drops the screwdriver, pulls Omega into his face by the hair, whispers something, then lets go.
Jon stumbles out of the ring and holds his hands high as we
End Show
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