Csonka’s Impact Wrestling Review 3.30.17

Csonka’s Impact Review 3.30.17

OFFICIAL RESULTS
– Andrew Everett defeated DJZ @ 4:27 via pin [**¾]
– Impact Grand Championship Match: Champion Moose defeated Cody Rhodes via split decision [**½]
– KM defeated Braxton Sutter @ 3:35 via pin [*]
– Impact Tag Team Title Match: LAX defeated Reno Scum, Decay and Laredo Kid & Garza Jr @ 12:10 via pin [***½]

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– Mathews and Borash met with the backstage powers about their issues. There is apparently a plan in place, Bruce met with EC3 and things aren’t good with him Karen arrives and says that they need to find Sienna for her. Prichard and Dutch look like they want to kill Mathews and Borash.

– We get highlights from last week’s show.

Karen Jarrett Talks: Karen is upset with Sienna for her actions last week, completely over blowing the situation considering sienna is basically just being a bully to Allie like always (BE A STAR). Karen then demanded an apology, talking down to Sienna. She was a bit too Stephanie McMahon here for my liking. Karen then compared her old evil self to Sienna, and is warning her to make her a better person. This led to Kevin Matthews (now KM) debuting as Sienna’s cousin. After a lot of shouting by KM, this was no good as it is hard to care when all he does is should like that. Inside voices KM, inside voices. Allie and Sutter ran off the duo of cousins as they threatened Karen. This gives Sienna a partner to properly feud with Allie and Sutter with Mike & Maria gone. Karen’s involvement felt completely forced and like she was only involved to make sure she got airtime. This was done to book KM vs. Braxton Sutter for later tonight. I also really wish that they would make a focused effort to not start most shows with a promo, they keep talking about being different, so be different.

– We get an X-Division promo.

Andrew Everett vs. DJZ: they worked a really fun, past paced back and forth open, trying to set the stage and lock into a more traditional X-division style of match; DJZ hit a dive and then a high cross in the ring for 2. Everett quickly fought back, laying in forearm strikes but got cut off with a DJZ lariat. DJZ laid the boots to him in the corner, but Everett escaped and then hit a springboard missile dropkick. He picked up the pace, took control and then hit an enziguri. Everett then hit the PELE, went up top but the moonsault was countered by the boots of DJZ, Everett then countered the ZDT with a cradle and picked up the win. Andrew Everett defeated DJZ @ 4:27 via pin [**¾] They were on their way to having a really good match, but got short changed on time as usual. To their credit, they made the most of what they got and delivered a fun match.

– Helms mocked Everett for finally winning a match, and then offered him an opportunity next week.

Rosemary Buries The Knockouts: Rosemary made her way out to the ring and instead of resetting for the viewers, Mathews was annoyingly talking about himself. This gimmick is no good. Rosemary slithers into the ring and Borash puts over her title run, and Rosemary says that she is the greatest champion of all time. She retired Gail, destroyed Brandi’s personal life and blackened Jade’s soul. ODB then arrived and introduced herself, and said Rosemary wouldn’t be here with out women like her. ODB promised to win the title. Brandi, KC Quinn, Rayne, MJ Jenkins, Rebel and Diamante all arrived and Rayne says she deserved the title shot. Brandi then said she’s here and she wants a shot. Listen ladies, Rosemary isn’t Oprah. They brawl with ODB working over Rosemary. ODB was positioned as a threat, but this was a rushed and chaotic segment that never really got the chance to settle in.

– That all leads to this…

BREAKING: NEXT WEEK on IMPACT a #Knockouts Battle Royal to determine a number 1 contender for @WeAreRosemary! #MakeImpactGreat pic.twitter.com/bxuRfDFBUZ

— IMPACT WRESTLING (@IMPACTWRESTLING) March 31, 2017

– Mathews and Borash argued again.

EC3 Talks: EC3 is out for promo time, I am not a fan of back-to-back promo segments and it hurts the momentum of the show. EC3 reiterated that he needs to find the old EC3 and promised to win the world title again. EC3 apologized for what he said to Karen Jarrett last week, and wants to make Impact great again. This was a nice reset promo from EC3, as he compared himself to Lashley, Roode and Styles as a two-time champion. He desperately needs a change, possibly a heel turn as previously mentioned. This led to James Storm arriving, and since DCC is seemingly dead, he’s now back to being the happy Cowboy. Storm said that EC3 didn’t mention him, and EC3 reminded Storm was not a multi-time world champion. Storm gave the, “I’ve been here since the beginning and built this company speech.” Storm runs down his credentials, being there for all of the company’s biggest shows and moments, mentioning Skipper’s cage walk. Storm was serious here, but they also had some fun and playful back and forth, with Storm noting that he deserved a last chance, or a last call so to speak. They claimed mutual respect, and EC3 says that the fans should decide Lashley’s next challenger. They play to the crowd, showing some great enthusiasm. EC3 says that these people will make the right call. I liked this, it felt as if they gave both guys a chance to reset their characters and set them up as potential title challengers; good work from both guys.

Impact Grand Championship Match: Champion Moose defeated Cody Rhodes w/Brandi Rhodes: Moose attacked at the bell, and controlled until Cody hit a DDT. Moose quickly hit the powerbomb, senton, and moonsault combo for the near fall. They brawled to the floor and Cody accidentally superkicked a judge when Moose avoided it. They continued to brawl, with Cody hitting the draping DDT. Post break, Bruce Prichard arrived to replace the judge. Moose won round one.. They went back and forth to begin round two, with Cody controlling early and hitting a lariat. Cody then attacked the knee, and worked to keep Moose grounded. Moose then fought back, but Cody fought off the powerbomb and sent Moose to the floor. Moose then caught Cody on a dive attempt and slammed him to the apron. Brandi stopped Moose from using a chair, allowing Cody to use her as a distraction and attack. Cody worked a figure four, but Moose survived the round. Cody won round two. Final round now, Brandi got mad at Cody and left, telling Cody she didn’t give a shit of Cody and Moose killed each other. They did the crazy fists brawl spot; Moose hit the bicycle kick and then the dropkick. Moose did the jabs, told Cody to suck it as he connoted with the flip-flop and fly elbow. Cody came back, hitting the disaster kick. They traded strikes, Moose took Cody down and then they worked back to the feet, trading strikes again. Final 30-seconds here and they did a double down. They then brawled through the final bell. Champion Moose defeated Cody Rhodes via split decision [**½] It really feels as if they are over relying on the judge’s decision finishes too much as of late. The match was solid, but lacked the fire of the Moose vs. Galloway matches, and there were too many distractions/bullshit.

– We get a video package on Richards vs. Edwards, from friends to enemies. They face off next week in a last man standing match.

– Eli Drake wants to make Impact great.

– Karen Jarrett arrived and gave Borash something. Borash announced the Knockouts gauntlet for next week, which will crown a new top contender.

KM w/Sienna vs. Braxton Sutter w/Allie: KM attacked right away, slapping Sutter around, which pissed off Sutter, who fired back. Sutter hit the big boot, landed mounted punches and then hit the sunset flip for 2. KM cut him off with the dropkick. They did a double down spot, the ladies did the Scooby-Doo chase, and after a flurry by Sutter, Sienna attacked Allie and that allowed KM to hit project Ciampa to pick up the win. KM defeated Braxton Sutter @ 3:35 via pin [*] This existed to give KM his first win and to continue the angle with Allie & Sutter. It wasn’t really bad or anything, just extremely bland and not all that entertaining.

– Post match, Allie and Sienna brawled as did KM and Sutter; Laurel is still drunk and in her wedding dress; amazing.

– Konnan breaks down LAX’s plan for tonight as they chill in the clubhouse.

Impact Tag Team Title Match: LAX vs. Reno Scum vs. Decay vs. Laredo Kid & Garza Jr: Konnan, Homicide, Rosemary and Diamante are all at ringside. Scum worked over Laredo Kid early, but LAX tagged in and took control. Garza took time to rip off his pants as things broke down and Laredo Kid hit a dive of the top to the floor and wiped out the pile. Garza then followed with a twisting dive as we went to commercial. Post break, Laredo Kid hit a 450, and Garza hit a standing moonsault for the near fall. I really like the chaotic feel this has, it’s focused and controlled, while never getting sloppy. Abyss cut off the flippy boys with clubbing offense, leading to a series of quick tags. Scum took control for a bit, but Laredo Kid fought back an LAX then took control, showing great teamwork as they beat down Scum. LAX hit a double stomp into a cutter combo, Diamante ten speared Rosemary and they brawled. LAX then hit a doomsday blockbuster on Laredo Kid to win the titles. LAX defeated Reno Scum, Decay and Laredo Kid & Garza Jr @ 12:10 via pin [***½] This was a very good main event, with LAX predictably (and it was the right call) winning; Laredo Kid and Garza looked great and I want a series of matches with LAX, as I think that it would be a ton of fun. The match got wild in a completely fun and entertaining way, bringing a great energy to the tag title scene. Everyone played their roles well here.

– End scene.

– Thanks for reading.

“Byyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyye Felicia!”

6.0

The final score: review Average

The 411

This was a solid show, with some set up for next week and a very good main event.