The Contentious Ten 10.24.11: Wrestler Taunts

Hello, and welcome to The Contentious Ten! My name is Nick Bazar, and I thank you for clicking.

A good wrestling taunt can go a long way. It can bring a crowd to their feet and put a smile on their face. It can be used to heighten the drama of a match, signaling the end is almost near. It can be incorporated into an entrance to make fans remember particular wrestlers. In fact, a taunt be so successful that it becomes even bigger than the wrestler who performs it. There have been many taunts throughout the years, some good, some bad. This list looks at the best taunts in all of professional wrestling; the taunts that left an impression on audiences of all ages, and had you mimicking them for years. And so, the Top Ten Wrestler Taunts…

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R-V-D size=6>

You don’t have to tell Rob Van Dam how good he is, he already knows. While RVD has always had the same calm and cool demeanor throughout his wrestling career, he is probably one of the most self-confident guys in the industry. Hell, it wouldn’t be a stretch to say that he is also one of the most self-absorbed guys in the industry as well. That’s what makes his signature “R-V-D” taunt all the more awesome. He doesn’t even have to pull off an incredible maneuver to warrant busting out the crowd pleasing pose. Remember his pay-per-view title defense against AJ Styles last year? He spent the first five or so minutes of the match posing! “R-V-D” on this turnbuckle, “R-V-D” on that turnbuckle, “R-V-D” on the ropes, “R-V-D” on some guy’s lap- you get the picture. It’s a fun taunt to play along with, and it’s over in any and all wrestling arenas around the world.

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Rick Rude Gyrate size=6>

If there was ever a more self-confident wrestler than RVD, it was Rick Rude. Not many guys can go around gyrating their hips suggestively and still come off as a badass. Rude could though, and he made a memorable career of it. Even younger fans who have never watched a Rude match can hear his name and immediately connect it with the signature taunt. If that isn’t a powerful example of how effective the Rude gyrate was, I don’t know what is. Think about the number of characters he inspired. Val Venis is the most obvious, but even aspects of John Morrison’s heel run with MNM was clearly reminiscent of Rude. Something else to point out is how perfectly well the gyrate fit Rude’s character. It epitomized his “girls wanna get with me and guys wanna be me” mentality that made his heel persona so successful. It got under your skin and made you want to see him get shut up.

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Bang, Bang size=6>

From the loveable hippie to the deranged and disfigured psychopath, Mick Foley has been through a number of successful incarnations throughout his career. He has given us popular catchphrases like “Have a nice day” and recognizable props like Mr. Socko. However, in spite of all that, when I think of Mick Foley, I think of a hardcore icon. A guy who has put his body on the line countless times, and has bled buckets all around the world. Simply put, when I think Mick Foley, I think Cactus Jack; I think “Bang, Bang.” The taunt was short and simple. All you needed were two finger guns in the air and a crazy expression on your face. If you saw him do that, you knew you were either about to watch something sick, or had just watched something sick. You really believed that he would do whatever it took to win a match. You believed that there were times when he didn’t feel the pain; or, if he did feel it, he damn sure handled it better than you ever could.

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Undertaker Throat Slash size=6>

Probably no other taunt in the wrestling business has meant “Match Over” more so than The Undertaker’s throat slash. Once Taker slowly mimics cutting his throat with his thumb and nails his opponent with the Tombstone, nine times out of 10, that poor guy isn’t getting up. It’s the reason why Shawn Michaels kicking out of the Tombstone at Wrestlemania 25 was one of the most believable false finishes of all time. Not only that, but the throat slash is also probably the creepiest and most chilling taunt out there. Not only because a large man is pretty much declaring he is about to end your career, but because it’s the freaking Undertaker declaring he is about to end your career. Other wrestlers such as Kane, Chris Benoit and even CW Anderson have performed the same taunt, but none of those variations have ever been as effective in the wrestling world as Taker’s. There is something special about Taker signaling the end of a match with a throat slash that can’t be replicated by any other wrestler.

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You Can’t See Me size=6>

Love him or hate him, you can’t deny that John Cena’s “You Can’t See Me” has become the most widely recognizable taunt of this new generation of wrestlers. I mean, not only does Cena have crossover appeal as a person, but the taunt itself is now known outside of the wrestling world too. That’s not something that comes around very frequently in this business. It developed out of his rapper gimmick that initially got him over with fans, and has become a prominent part of every single one of his matches since. It’s integrated into his comeback sequence for crying out loud. If you just watched him drive his opponent into the mat with an Attitude Adjustment, chances are you also saw him wave his hand in front of his face and led the audience in a “You can’t see me” chant. Speaking of which, it’s also very easy to do. Seeing as how a large portion of his fanbase is comprised of younger kids, they can easily show their allegiance to the CeNation with a simple wave of the hand.

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Crotch Chop size=6>

In wrestling, the crotch chop has been done most famously and with the most longevity by D-Generation X, but also got a fair amount of use from select members of WCW’s New World Order such as Scott Hall. It’s a fun taunt to perform, and, like many others on this list, is simple and easily replicated by fans, which is usually something you want out of a successful and memorable taunt. In fact, it’s so easy to do, that you can often forget exactly what it is that you are signaling for when you cross your arms and chop your crotch. Basically, you’re telling whoever is in front of you to suck your dick, so you may want to use caution when performing it, especially in front of a non-wrestling fan. But yeah, it’s one of those taunts that was a perfect fit for the era in which it was introduced. During a time when fans were cheering for the rebel and booing the goodie two shoes, a crotch chop followed by a loud “Suck It!” was exactly what would make you lots of money as a wrestling company.

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The Macho Man size=6>

As wrestling fans, we all know how it goes, and have likely tried to imitate it many times in the past. The wide open twirl, the hand on the wrist with a finger wiggle- Oooooh Yeah! It was incredibly fun to watch, and even more fun to try and impersonate. Just ask Jay Lethal. It’s the kind of showmanship that makes wrestling different from any other form of entertainment. It’s the kind of taunt that defines what being “larger than life” really means. It’s also the kind of taunt that’s unfortunately missing from wrestling these days. We have too many wrestlers trying to go with what makes them come across as cool, and not enough who get lost in their character so much that it puts a smile on your face and makes you get lost in the moment with them. That’s what Randy Savage’s Macho Man shtick did, and it’s a huge part of the reason for why he is remembered by wrestling fans so fondly.

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You’re Number One! size=6>

If John Cena’s “You Can’t See Me” is the most popular taunt of the 2000s, then Stone Cold Steve Austin’s middle finger is the most popular taunt of the 1990s. Austin managed to incorporate the middle finger salute into all aspects of his character. During backstage promos? Yes. During his entrance? Yes. Just before delivering a Stone Cold Stunner? Oh hell yea. Images of Austin holding up his two middle fingers are iconic. Take for example the shot of Austin showing Mike Tyson exactly what he thought of him in the middle of the ring. It’s the kind of attitude that helped a fledging WWF conquer the red-hot WCW. What makes it great is the fact that everybody can relate to the feeling of wanting to take your frustrations out on someone or something with the simple use of a middle finger, and the satisfaction you feel after doing it. Sure, it wouldn’t really work in today’s WWE environment, and it gets rather annoying to watch a bunch of blurred out fingers on Attitude-era highlights, but at the time, it was perfect.

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Woooo size=6>

Unlike every other taunt on this list, Ric Flair’s legendary “Wooo” involves no hand motions, hand signals or any kind of movement for that matter. All it takes it a loud voice. It just goes to show you, less is more. Simple is better. Put yourself in attendance at any live wrestling event across the country. What do you hear? Wooo! Wooo! Wooo! Before the show, during the show and even as you’re making your way out of the arena. Another example: let’s say a wrestler starts putting knife-edge chops to his opponent in the middle of a match. What do you hear? Wooo! Wooo! Wooo! That’s how popular this taunt is. Ric Flair doesn’t even have to be in the building for fans to start chanting it. That said, it doesn’t get any better than when Flair does it. He’ll be strutting around the ring before the bell and let out a big Wooo to get in his opponent’s head. He’ll be reddening his opponent’s chest with chops and let out a Wooo to let him know who he is in the ring with. He’ll slap on the Figure Four leglock in the middle of the ring and let out a Wooo to show his opponent that he’s in trouble. It’s one of the most flexible taunts in all of wrestling.

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The Hulk Hogan size=6>

How important is this taunt? Let me put it this way: it’s about 75% of what makes Hulk Hogan, Hulk Hogan. The shirt ripping, the muscle flexing, the ear cupping- it’s all one taunt, and what a legendary taunt it is. Everyone knows of it. Wrestling fans, non-wrestling fans, everyone. It transcends wrestling. Not only that, but everyone has wanted to do it. Come on, who doesn’t want to get in a ring and gage the audience with an exaggerated ear cupping? Who hasn’t cut a small slit in an old shirt to experience the feeling of ripping a shirt off your back? If you haven’t, what are you waiting for?! Even when you think the Hogan character has run its course, it always proves it’s good for another nostalgia run. Look at this year’s Bound For Glory. When Hogan started hulking up and ripping that shirt, the crowd exploded. It was a sight to see, and easily the most memorable part of the entire show. “The Hulk Hogan” is, in my opinion, the best wrestling taunt of all time.

Before you go, check out Michael Ornelas’ new short! I give it a solid ***3/4…