The Furious Flashbacks – History of the LPWA

The Furious Flashbacks – History of the LPWA

Many famous women from the 80s get referenced in this review

Women’s wrestling has always struggled in North America. Major promotions don’t always take it seriously. Both WWE and WCW seemed to take it in turns to be interested in women’s wrestling although at times both didn’t care. So often independent promotions pop up where talented female wrestlers can get a pay day. LPWA was one of those. It sprung up in 1989 during the Hulkamania Boom. It came about almost directly from the NWA & WWF phasing out their women’s divisions in 1989.

This is available in the UK via Quantum Leap Propaganda who do all manner of specialist DVD releases including vintage football matches, extreme sports and ladies wrestling. Most irritating feature of this DVD; it has no chapters. None. So if you want to skip to a certain match you have to fast forward from the start. Which is just unbelievable in this day and age. That’s a deal breaker in some households.

We’re on Home Video! Host is Ken Reznick. He introduces the History of the LPWA and the “first five years” (it didn’t last that long) of the LPWA. He explains that Susan Sexton was awarded the title back in 1990 ala Triple H.

LPWA title – Susan Sexton (c) v Misty Blue Simmes

Sexton is a leggy blonde with a hairstyle out of Dynasty. Simmes looks like Linda Hamilton in The Terminator. Both of them look like they’re about to do a Jane Fonda keep fit workout. This must be the 80s. Lots of energy in the early going although Simmes isn’t a flier and doesn’t realise. Her grappling is solid though and both girls can bump. But then Misty was trained by Killer Kowalski. They ambitiously try to do a crossbody over the top, which is never happening so Sexton just throws Misty over the top, which causes a DQ. **1/4. That was good shit but it was sure rushed.

LPWA tag title tournament – Team America (Misty Blue Simmes/Heidi Lee Morgan) v The Glamour Girls (Leilani Kai/Judy Martin)

Morgan has been around. She’s got a feud with Wendi Richter under her belt by this point and she’d later job to Alundra Blayze (Madusa) in the WWF’s re-booted women’s division. She looks like a skinny Dolly Parton. The Glamour Girls were a big hit in the 80s in the WWF. They look Moolah old by this point. Morgan tries for an early victory roll, which is ugly as sin. Simmes is the most entertaining person in this match. Glamour Girls heel it up but don’t run formula. They’re not really equipped to deal with Simmes’ offence. Kai faceplants a headscissors takeover. Simmes gets a figure four, Kai gets the ropes and the ref kicks her off. What? She’s trying to break the hold. Its one of the major rules of professional wrestling. I’m surprised Eddie Sharkey had never heard of it. This match plods along, unlike the opener, which was fast-paced. I guess the Glamour Girls got their way in the match planning. The match breaks down and we get a load of horrible dropkicks. Can no one do a dropkick in 80s women’s wrestling? Bell rings with Morgan applying a sleeper but the ref waves it off. Then he leaves. What the fuck are you doing ref? Apparently the time limit expires so the ref has to name winners and he awards it to Team America. What the fuck kind of finish is that? *1/2. A long way to go for a non-finish where the babyfaces still go over. Remarkably stupid stuff.

Madusa Miceli v The Goddess w/Jonathon Blue

Madusa is an Italian girl with babyface enthusiasm. That doesn’t quite seem right. Sure is hot though. Goddess is a masked wrestler with blonde hair. Madusa dropkicks her out of the ring. Hey, there’s a good dropkick! Man, Madusa’s ring gear is awesome. There are bits of it missing like the moths have been at it and its putting some serious T & A into the card. Goddess struggles to keep up and some of her bumps are late. Madusa has it won with a Boston crab but Goddess slips out sideways. Madusa shows so much promise here that you could see she was going to be a star. Its just a pity Goddess can’t keep up so her spots look rubbish by comparison. Madusa breaks out a fantastic spin kick followed by a powerbomb for 2. MISSILE DROPKICK! Madusa is raising the bar on dropkick quality! Goddess can’t bump a swinging neckbreaker. Oh dear. Another powerbomb should finish but Blue jumps in to break the fall. Erm, that’s a DQ. Goddess jumps Madusa from behind and the ref fast counts her down? What the fuck? Another retarded finish. *. Madusa is the best wrestler on show so far but the scrub they threw in with her just wasn’t good enough. And they still jobbed her!

PROMO TIME Ken Reznick tries to interview Adnan Al-Kaissie’s valet Sheba but the Sheik turns up too. Adnan went on to the WWF and the General that helped Sgt Slaughter assault Hulkamania during the Iraq War. He was actually a friend and schoolmate of Saddam Hussein. Reznick makes me laugh by referring to English as “the universal language”. Adnan says Sheba does what she’s told.

Adnan Al-Kaissie/Sheba v Adrian Street/Miss Linda

Adnan isn’t particularly good, as anyone who saw him wrestle in the WWF can testify. Sheba accidentally gets whacked with a clothesline from Adnan and Miss Linda pins for the win. Shitty clothesline, awesome bump. Yeah, Sheba is the better worker on that team.

POST MATCH Adnan puts a beating on Sheba, which she sells like a champ, and SGT SLAUGHTER jumps off commentary to kick his ass for AMERICA.

The Glamour Girls w/Sheik Adnan Al-Kaissie v Shelly Francis/Rusty Thomas

Adnan switches to rougher looking broads. Rusty is hot but she’s also not paying attention to Shelly, who is the former Sheba under her Americanised name. Instead checking her nails for dirt. When Shelly tries desperately to get a tag Rusty punches her in the face and a 3 on 1 beatdown ensues. Tina Moretti (aka Ivory) with the save. FAILED. Susan Sexton decides this ain’t happening on her watch and she makes the save. Adnan starts mouthing off so Sgt Slaughter runs him off too.

Terri Power v Rusty Thomas

Terri Power was LPWA’s superstar. She went on to be Tori in the WWF. Jim Cornette is on colour now. Rusty is hot but she’s useless in the ring. She’s too slow and everything looks like its blown even when its not. Power overpowers her, jacks her up for most of the spots and then hits a superplex for the win. Crowd pop the shit out of her.

Reggie Bennett v Lady X

Reggie is a powerhouse. I’ve seen her work before. Cornette makes fun of her saying she’s been working for the phone company skinning up poles in her spare time. They head outside and brawl into the announce position. DQ. Wild brawl. Hey, Louie Spicolli is the timekeeper!

POST MATCH Bonnie Blackstone gets a word with Reggie. She says if Lady X wants a brawl, she can have one. Lady X runs back out here and another brawl breaks out. That was fun.

Denise Storm v Alison Royal

Royal is a good little babyface who’d join Team America later. She kinda reminds me of Shelley Long from Cheers. Storm is bigger, stronger and meaner. She dominates with power and finishes with a double axe handle named “The Thunderstorm”. Squash.

Bambi v Magnificent Mimi

Mimi comes out to Miami Sound Machine. I’m guessing she’s trying to sell herself as a Gloria Estefan type. Has the same hair, that’s about where the comparisons end. Jonathan Blue is her manager. He distracts Bambi at the bell allowing Mimi to get a sneaky roll up for the win. That match was maybe 5 seconds long.

Bambi v Magnificent Mimi

This is scrappy. They work in bad spots like a stomach punch off an Irish whip, which is back bumped. Bambi goes after Jonathan Blue, which gets her double teamed and awarded the match via DQ. Brad Rheingans makes the save. He was working for LPWA as a trainer.

Bambi v Magnificent Mimi

Did this series really need to be all on here? Mimi’s dress is slightly more revealing this time, which is a bonus. Some of the wrestling improves in this bout. Mimi seems better on offence and Bambi when she’s selling. So that’s handy. The mat counters are also far better than the last match, which was too loose. Bambi hits the Georgia Bulldog but Jonathan Blue breaks the pin. So that’s another DQ. The heels spike Bambi with a piledriver for kicks.

LPWA title – Susan Sexton (c) v Lady X w/Ashley Kennedy

2/3 falls. Ashley is Lady X’s “owner” and looks like a socialite from upstate New York. Lady X is played by Peggy Lee Leather, another journeywoman wrestler who appeared everywhere. Sexton feels like a star, which separates her from the majority of this roster. She has power, looks and style. Plus she knows where to insert high spots. An airplane spin into a slam grabs fall one for the champ.

Lady X starts fall 2 with the stomach claw. Cornette tries like hell to get the move over. Sexton once again knows where to insert a spot and sets up a crossbody so Lady X can roll through it for the equalising fall.

Sexton does the roll through Boston crab out of a slingshot, which is a predecessor to Lance Storm’s Maple Leaf. In slow motion. Sexton figures she can get this done and goes for roll ups to finish. Lady X keeps slipping the shoulder out but she’s surviving rather than competing. Lady X slams Sexton by the ropes and Ashley Kennedy holds the legs down for the screwjob finish. New champ. **1/2. Solid match with Sexton’s athleticism countering Lady X’s heel antics.

Susan Sexton v Madusa Miceli

This is a bit of a dream match based on what I’ve seen so far. This is before Sexton lost the strap and is for the title but putting it after the loss to Lady X rather telegraphs the result. Madusa gets caught in two minds a few times, which doesn’t help the fluidity of the bout. Sexton takes it with a rollup and the count is REALLY fast. Was that a gimmick? Madusa always gets screwed by the ref?

Susan Sexton v Magnificent Mimi

Sexton just kills Mimi’s back. Just kills it. At one point slamming her on the apron at an angle where Mimi has no choice but to fall her on her head. Electric Chair gets the pin shortly afterwards.

Susan Sexton v The Beast w/Ashley Kennedy

Beast looks like a gigantic biker lesbian. Beast gets slapped in a Figure Four with Ashley screaming that she can’t quit because she paid her too much money to give up. The ref decides to stop it anyway.

PROMO TIME “Queen” Christopher Love & the Queen’s Court (The Glamour Girls). Yeah, so he’s a gay or rather playing a gay.

Team America v The Glamour Girls

Christopher Love somewhat detracts from the match by joining commentary and complaining about the two hookers his team has to wrestle. Team America sure are the lookers in this one. Not that you see much of the match because they keep cutting to Love eating cream cakes and drinking tea. The Glamour Girls get beaten up for chuckles. That is until Morgan misses with a missile dropkick and the Glamour Girls take the first fall.

Crowd get a “USA” chant going as the Girls run heat on Misty. Morgan gets the hot tag and starts busting out Flair’s spots. Zuh? Misty takes fall two with a Superfly Splash.

Into the last fall then. More “USA” chants. This breaks down and gets ugly thus contrasting the reverse formula/formula antics of the first two falls. Cornette’s commentary saves it. “She’s been in more laps than a napkin”. Just as the structure returns it breaks down again. Judy Martin bails for a cream cake or some other foreign object. Misty gets blasted in the noggin with it and the Glamour Girls win the tag titles. **3/4. I could have done without fall three but otherwise it was a solid outing.

Team America v Nasty Kat/Nasty Linda

Apparently the Nasty Girls used to be Misty Blue Simmes’ friends but they turned on her. This pretty much goes directly to shit and does not pass go. Misty gets attacked with nunchuks thus drawing a DQ.

Team America v Bad, Black & Beautiful w/Boogaloo Brown

Guess the ethnicity of the opposing team here? Well, you’d only be half right because the Bad half is a white chick. She gets pinned with a Rocket Launcher.

Team America v Team Mexico

I didn’t even catch the names of the luchadores due to Ken Reznick’s accent and slurring. I suspect he’s drunk. The Mexican team are the most entertaining that Team America has faced. They even break out a tag team rowboat. Misty finishes with her Superfly Splash.

Harley Saito v Mizuki Endoh

Two Japanese imports. Saito is the face but neither of them are conventionally pretty. The wrestling is slick as fuck with great selling and snap on everything. It makes me want to go and get some AJW DVD’s again. The dropkicks are stiffer, the suplexes have actual snap on them and the submission holds look painful. The Boston crab that Endoh uses is sick. Way better than any submission hold on the rest of the tape. Plus these girls are so much faster than everyone else. Endoh with a shoulderbreaker for 2. Saito comes back with a swank spin kick and the Tombstone finishes. ***1/2. Crowd pop the shit out of the finish because these two worked their socks off.

Rockin’ Robin v Black Venus w/Boogaloo Brown

Oh God, this is awful by comparison. Venus has no timing and Robin is only sporadically fun with her offence. Then they up the ante with Robin getting busted open. Robin gets all pissed off about it but loses her way because of the cut (which isn’t very big) and Venus hits an Electric Chair for the win. That was a big move in 1990. Boogaloo Brown looks like Bobby Brown. I think its deliberate.

LPWA title – Lady X (c) v Terri Power

X tries to heel it up but Power just bosses her. LPWA was very serious about pushing Power to the moon. So much so they jobbed the face Sexton to a heel transitional champ so she could destroy her here. She gets to showcase most of her moveset including skinning the cat to show she’s not all about her strength. Lady X gauges the face but she can’t control the match because of Power’s power. She’s continues with the cheating tack, as she’s really got nothing else. Power continues to dominate so Lady X hits her with a glass and slams her on the floor. Power looks to have it with a powerslam but Lady X gets a foot on the rope. The secondary tactic of Lady X seems to be tiring Power out. Which is more likely to work because she has to haul all those muscles around. They fuck up a loaded mask swandive spot and Power hits a crossbody to win the title. **1/4. Decent stuff with Lady X trying everything but still unable to cope with Power’s ability.

Lady X v Reggie Bennett

So now, like with Sexton, we see Lady X’s title defences after she’s lost the strap. This is a terrible DVD. I’m finding it exceptionally hard to stick with it. This is actually non-title and Bennett gets the pin. She looks like a roided up Mickie James. She calls Ashley Kennedy a coward, which gets her a courageous belt shot to the back of the head.

Lady X v Bambi

This sure is a mess. Bambi does monkey flips and assorted similar shit. Lady X blows a counter on a monkey flip so they repeat the spot with Lady X holding the ropes. And that was the finish. Yikes.

Bambi/Malia Hosaka v The Glamour Girls

Malia is quite entertaining with her flying spots but their team isn’t in the league of the Glamour Girls and whenever tagging kicks in they’re doomed.

Terri Power v Denise Storm

Booking Storm in there is very deliberate as she’s the same sort of size but not quite as powerful. Power has been noticeably softened since she won the title. She looks more feminine. Then the bell rings and everyone looks confused. Time limit expires. Storm hits a neckbreaker anyway.

We cut to Reznick who hopes we enjoyed our look back on the “first five years” of the LPWA and says the future is bright. Of course this DVD was produced long after they’d gone out of business so the term ‘future’ is highly subjective.

The 411: I feel bad for these guys because they had bits and pieces of a good product but couldn’t seem to pull it all together. The storylines were fine never seemed to create big enough stars and the wrestling was fine but the better workers never seemed to get the big matches. Its an interesting chunk of wrestling history even if the DVD production value leaves a lot to be desired. Unless you really like women’s wrestling, this is probably a pass.

Final Score:  5.0   [ Not So Good ]