The Happy-Go-Sucky Wrestling Report: 05.13.09

Big thanks to Daniel Wilcox for covering me at the last minute last week! As it turns out, my company has decided to put strict rules down on internet usage at work, and it all started last Tuesday. Typically, I write this column in my downtime at work and finish it up by the time I get home. Yes it litereally takes my entire Tuesday every week to churn out this little piece of internet heaven. So today, sinus infection, medication and all, I’ve had to churn this out in a matter of a couple of hours.

Anyway, news seems slow this week and I took a wrestling vacation last week (meaning I fast forwarded through all my wrestling programming on my DVR all week) and I’ve not had a full nights sleep in five days! So this should be interesting! Cue Banner!

News: “WWE will be in the rebuilding process during the next few months as the company tries to make new stars, and officials are expecting the ratings to dip during the process. There are plans to bring in more development wrestlers from FCW and start them with a solid plan instead of just putting them on TV and hoping for something to come from it. There are discussions of making a rule to where creative writers would work over a limited amount of wrestlers so that attention can go to the newer talent. The expectation is for WWE to become more about wrestling with there being four shows a week and possibly a fifth show being added.”

Happy: For the first time, for what seems like the better half of 7 years, the WWE is FINALLY realizing that guys like Triple H, John Cena, and Edge aren’t going to carry the company forever. In fact, in the next 5 years, there’s a chance neither of them will be wrestling anymore. Then what do you do? Triple H is getting up there in age. Cena’s become both injury prone and Hollywood bound and it’s tough to forget about Edge’s neck.

So if you’re guys like Matt Hardy, C.M. Punk, Christian, John Morrison, MVP, Shelton Benjamin, Umaga, and Evan Bourne, you’re doing cartwheels. These are guys, with the exception of Evan Bourne, who have been wrestling in mid card hell for the last 2 or 3 years behind guys like Triple H, John Cena, and Edge. And since the WWE continues to repeat storylines like Cena vs. Edge over and over again at their pay-per-views, that means that maybe just maybe we can get a program that would involve the likes of John Cena vs. Matt Hardy or Triple H vs. C.M. Punk or Edge vs. Evan Bourne in the near future.

The fact of the matter is, ratings are dropping. They didn’t go up or down this week and we’re only a few weeks out of Wrestlemania. There’s no competition from football and the TV networks are wrapping up their season finales. So there’s no reason why Raw should still be suffering in the ratings. I’m very glad to see that they are nipping this now instead of waiting until the ratings dip below 2.5.

Not to mention adding a possible 5th show (and maybe a 4th brand?), calling up new fresh talent and not sticking them with the “ECW New Superstar Initiative” sticker, the other wrestlers will really have to step it up and keep ahead of the new guys. All in all, this should be a positive experience for us all after it’s all said and done.

Go Sucky: Didn’t the WWE sort of try this out last year when C.M. Punk was the World Heavyweight Champion, Kofi Kingston was the Intercontinental champion and Cody Rhodes and Ted Dibiase were tag team champions on Raw?

I think the WWE is taking a big risk by pulling this off right now. By the time they recover from all the changes they’ll make, it will be football season, and the ratings will drop again regardless of how well they change the product around. I think it would have been wise for the WWE to wait until football season and start changing things then because there’s no way in hell the WWE will ever compete with the ratings Monday Night Football gets.

Next, will the WWE push guys who are still too green to work the main event? And by getting some of the guys from FCW a chance at the big roster, will they push them too hard and put them or others in harm’s way?

But wait, there’s more! The WWE is going WAY overboard with all its shows. They just started show #4 with Superstars and it has yet to get a 1.0 (though it came pretty close last week). And now they’re talking about another show before they even get show #4 is established and stable? All these shows are inevitably taking away from Raw. Back in the day, Raw was the ONLY chance you could see wrestling. Now you can litereally see wrestling every single day of the week and it’s getting to be a bit much. Perhaps ratings are dropping because people are only watching one show or another and not all the shows. There is defiantly a bit of wrestling overload and a fifth show will probably decrease overall ratings that much more.

News: Hernandez will be out 6-9 months after suffering from a neck injury.

Happy: Obviously, an injury of this magnitude is never a good thing. But in the long run, this could be just what Hernandez and TNA need. Let me explain myself.

Think back a few months ago when TNA was talking about splitting LAX up. Ultimately, I’m pretty sure that’s why they both won briefcases in the feast or fired match. Homicide now, for the next few months, will be able to shine on his own and get involved in a reborn X-division and eventually cash in his Feast or Fired case and win the X-Division title.

On the other end, when Hernandez heals up, he’ll be gone long enough for people to miss him. LAX’s popularity will still be in tact due to Homicide and when he returns, he’ll have a chance to return and make a BIG “Impact”. He’s still got that Feast or Fired briefcase so he’ll not only be able to return to a big ovation, he’ll be able to return and immediately rise to main event.

That of course, if TNA plays their cards right. If there’s anything that history has taught us when it comes to professional wrestling, it’s that injuries often lead to better storylines and future pushes. It doesn’t always work that way, but when played right, it usually does.

For LAX, any change is probably a welcome change. They’ve hardly been used in the last month or two, despite being the TNA version of “Money In The Bank”. Here’s hoping for a speedy recovery for Hernandez and a great few months for Homicide!

Go Sucky: It’s a shame for Hernandez to have this happen now. He and Homicide won those briefcases all the way back on Thanksgiving in November and we’ve hardly heard anything about them. Hernandez cashed his in once on Kurt Angle but was granted a rematch of some sorts and then never used it. Now, he may not even get to use it. I don’t know if the Feast or Fired briefcases actually have “time limits” on them. Does he have to use it before a year or forfeit it? Or could there be a chance that TWO guys will be holding a Feast or Fired World Title Briefcase come late November, early December?

On top of all that, what if I’m wrong about Homicide? What if he’s flooded deep into the middle of the already neglected and diluted X-Division? 9 months from now, will people give a damn about LAX and who they were? Will they ever be able to get Hernandez back where he was in 2008?

News: WWE has officially announced that they will be releasing a “Rise and Fall of WCW” DVD this year.

Happy: As a former WCW/n.W.o diehard, I’m really excited about this one. I find myself hitting up Youtube when I’m bored and looking up old WCW matches for the sake of wrestling nostalgia. Those two great years Nitro stayed ahead of Raw were what made wrestling “cool”, and that is what will likely be featured on this DVD. Those are the matches I’d LOVE to own and see over and over again and that is why this DVD will be a big success among people who still care about wrestling or at least at one point cared about wrestling.

I think it will be interesting to hear the commentaries as well from guys like Ric Flair, Arn Anderson, maybe even Lex Luger or DDP. Guys who spent the better parts of their careers over there and hear some of the stories that went on behind the scenes. Not that there hasn’t been 5 million shoot videos made on it or books written about it.

Other than that, it should also be kind of interesting to hear what guys who didn’t experience the Monday Night Wars say about WCW. Guys like John Cena or CM Punk. Neither of them wrestled in WCW at any point did they? I’m sure if they did, you’ll all be quick to correct me a couple hundred times.

Regardless, to me, the topic of WCW’s popularity back in the 90’s never gets old.

Go Sucky: I would take this DVD a lot more serious if I knew legitimate WCW guys were going to be on the DVD giving commentary and thoughts. I’m talking about guys like Booker T, Sting, Kevin Nash, Scott Hall, Jeff Jarrett, so on and so forth. But it’s obvious as the sun is bright that those guys won’t be on the DVD due to their contract with TNA.

That leaves Ric Flair and Arn Anderson as the only two guys I trust to hear the story about WCW. There will probably be guys like DDP and Buff Bagwell who will show up and make a quick buck off the DVD. Maybe even Lex Luger. And of course, probably Hulk Hogan who, quite honestly, has lost all credibility the moment he opens his mouth.

I’m really hoping that Vince gives WCW a proper sendoff, but I’m doubting it. It’s going to be hard to take it serious if Vince uses all his wrestlers to take a big three hour dump on his former competitor who quite honestly, made him a LOT of money and fans. You don’t see as many people watching wrestling these days without the fierce competition. But it’s pretty predictable that it will be 3 hours of “Eric Bischoff was a genius” to “Vince Russo is a douche”.

Hey, I wonder if they’ll have a special section to let David Arquette talk about his title reign!

News: In a recent interview, Bob Holly says he took pain pills out of Mr. Kennedy’s bag, and Mr. Kennedy ratted him out, subsequently leading to his release.

I’m not going to debate the good or bad here but express my disappointment in both Hardcore Holly and Mr. Kennedy.

First off, Hardcore Holly shouldn’t be pointing fingers at anyone. It’s apparent for two reasons that his pain pill usage was bad. For one, he basically stole a prescription medication. And second, his addiction was bad enough that the WWE put him through rehab. So for Hardcore Holly to come out and point fingers at anyone but himself is just stupid and immature. Man up and face the consequences.

Secondly, the more I hear, the more I begin to think that Ken Kennedy is nothing more than a little, whiney bitch. At one point, I was a huge fan of Mr. Kennedy and was REALLY hoping to see him rise to the top. Then he opened his mouth, got caught with steroids and has been reeling ever since. And now I hear this story about how he went and told daddy about Big Mean Bob stealing his pain candy.

The best I can hope for here is that perhaps Mr. Kennedy was concerned about Hardcore Holly since he was evidently so hard up for a pain pill that he’d take a pill straight out of someone else’s bag. But wouldn’t that be a double standard?

News: The WWE ran a vignette hyping the return of Mr. Kennedy.

Happy: Speak of the devil! As much of a douche Mr. Kennedy is out of the ring, he’s a decent draw in the ring. He’s got charisma and mic skills that has helped put him over. Not to mention that this apparent new “rebuilding process” should really benefit him as well since he’s been gone for the better part of the last 2 years, he’ll almost seem like a new guy. And a fresh face on Raw is certainly a positive.

Go Sucky: Mr. Kennedy’s reputation has been shot more times than Dick Cheney’s hunting assistants. First off, the guy is a liability. He keeps getting hurt and they aren’t just minor injuries, they’re injuries that shelf him for months and months at a time.

Second, the guy can’t seem to keep his mouth shut. He messed up his push in 2006 when he was supposed to be Vince’s illegitimate child. He’s getting a reputation as a whiney brat as shown by the previous news bit. And he’s been out of the ring so much and so often that a lot of people may not know or care who he is anymore. It’s all about how the WWE pushes him and how bad they want to get him back into that “future” role.

Rapid Fire!

News: Raw scored a 3.3 rating, the same as last week.

Wait, I thought ratings were supposed to drop?

News: Lance Storm will make his in ring return for Ring of Honor in July.

Does anyone else keep hoping that Lance Storm will show up on Dancing with the Stars someday?

News: TNA Epix will debut in the UK this Friday.

I’ve been out for awhile. How many times has the term “Epix Fail” been used so far?

News: Raw scored a 3.3 rating, the same as last week.

Wait, I thought ratings were supposed to drop?

And that’s going to do it! Hopefully we’ll try this again next week! Until then, may your lives be Happy…or Go Sucky!