Watry’s WWE Greatest Royal Rumble Review

“Hello Mr. Watry,

“I’m an avid reader, and I just wanted to reach out and tell you how much I enjoy your articles. I find them very insightful and well-written and I really find your perspective unique. I think what I appreciate most is how little negativity you show. I respect that. I’m honestly not sure why you are met with such resentment and hostility by some of the readers, but I guess you can’t make everyone happy. Anyway, thank you again for all you do and please keep up the good work.”

– 411mania reader

Backstory

This is my Greatest Royal Rumble EVERRRRRRRRRRR review. Up next will be my monthly reader feedback column for April. Get your comments in now! Alright, let’s do this.

Greatest Royal Rumble

John Cena V Triple H – Shocking way to start the show but made sense in hindsight. The live crowd in Saudi Arabia was going to be pumped up big time. No better way to get them going than with HHH and Cena doing battle. A true clash of legends and something we have not seen in eight years. Truth be told, I didn’t know what to expect from the fans in attendance. Would they be rowdy or clap with respect every few minutes? My curiosity was answered within seconds. They were beyond jacked for both Triple H and John Cena. I assumed the latter would win, and in the end, he did, but what a ride getting there! Perfect opener.

Cedric Alexander V Kalisto – Cruiserweight Championship on the line., of course. I am a fan of both men. Following Cena/HHH was never going to be easy. However, these two did their best and came out of it with a moral victory. Cedric got the actual one two three, but Kalisto can hold his head high here.

Jeff Hardy V Jinder Mahal – In my preview column, I ultimately decided that WWE would NOT switch the mid-card titles around. It was a decent hook and a clever red herring to have Raw and Smackdown Live stars do battle over a championship…but nothing was going to happen. Hardy would retain, as would Rollins. My guess is this officially puts to end the Jinder Mahal Experiment. I mean, the Swanton Bomb landed perfectly clean. There was no controversy whatsoever.

IC Championship Ladder Match – Seth Rollins retained, which is what I predicted. I admit it was tempting to imagine The Miz or even Samoa Joe taking the belt over to the blue brand. A lot could have been done with those options. Sad to say Finn Balor never stood a chance. I like that Monday Night RAW-llins retained, but I love HOW he retained. To literally steal the win right out of Balor’s hands was great. Heist of the century part two? Clearly, this sets up a rematch between the two down the road. No complaints there.

Byron Saxton/Kickoff Panel – Ugh, Byron was not entertaining or natural. Sounded nervous and had no clue how to stall for time. Not even Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler, and Booker T could save this nonsense.

Chris Jericho/Daniel Bryan Interviews – Not much to it. Jericho was funny with his MikeTom bit but really needs to ditch The List. Bryan showed passion, and I thought if he was ever going to win a Royal Rumble match, it would be now.

Smackdown LIVE Tag Team Titles – The Bludgeon Brothers won with ease. No real reason to harp on this bout…

…sorry.

RAW Tag Team Titles – Well, The Bar are now on Smackdown LIVE. That kinda spoiled this. I have no issue with that. It is an under card tag team championship match. Big deal the end game was already spelled out for us. We knew Matt Hardy and Bray Wyatt would capture the belts. and they did. If this WOKEN thing is for you, this was wonderful. If it isn’t, then meh. Sheamus and Cesaro will do good things on Tuesdays, which is why I picked them to be moved in the 2018 Superstar Shakeup. Solo or together, they are too good to be ignored.

Segment – The Daivari brothers got beat up. Fun segment for the locals. I didn’t care. Moving on…

NOTE: Yes, I know I am jumping around in chronological order. Writing this off memory.

WWE Championship Match – So much for all those title change rumors! Gotta love the headlines though. Once again folks, guessing is NOT reporting. I also could have guessed a bunch of big events would happens. Doesn’t mean it is legitimate news with actual sources saying so. Just basic common sense. Luckily though, I am too smart for that, and I did NOT pick all these magical title changes to take place. The Shinsuke Nakamura/AJ Styles feud fit this perfectly. There was no reason for a new WWE Champoon to be crowned on April 27th. At the same time though, a Styles win helps nobody on Smackdown Live. It had to have a funky ending and with a stacked card and mostly clean finishes, it worked. We now get a rematch at an upcoming pay-per-view with even more energy behind the feud.

The Undertaker V Rusev – Eh, whatever, Whether it was Chris Jericho or Rusev, The Undertaker was going to win within ten minutes. Probably less. The Saudi Arabia promoters who put this deal together apparently wanted every big name available for this event. Stone Cold, Shawn Michaels, JR, Lawler, Rey Mysterio, and everybody in between. Some declined the invitation, while some accepted. That is why we got HHH, Cena, Taker, and more legends on the show without much explanation. The Casket Match gimmick was nothing more than that – a gimmick. Pinfall, submission, didn’t matter. I must say though – poor Aiden English! Geez, even he got it…

Universal Championship Steel Cage Match – Better than their WrestleMania 34 battle but still nowhere near their classic in 2015. Honestly, I flip flopped on this prediction so much during the past week or so. When it was first announced, I picked Brock Lesnar. I figured if WWE wanted to crown a new champ, it would have happened at Mania. Then as we got closer, I leaned Roman Reigns. Pretty much just throwing my hands up in not having a clue what would happen. Finally, as I watched the event unfold on Friday, I went back to my gut instinct: Brock would retain by hook or crook. That is what we saw. Reigns can claim he was the better man, blah, blah, blah. Yet, still not Universal Championship. Lesnar and Reigns took one heck of a nasty fall to the outside of the cage, props for that spear. Brutal landing. Where we go from here? Again, I am throwing my hands up in the air. I have no clue.

50 Man Royal Rumble Match – Here we go! I am ready for a loooooooooooong main event.

1-Daniel Bryan out first. Well, he was one of my three favorites. Lashley being second and Braun Strowman being at the top, if you read my preview column (on another website). I guess he isn’t winning. Might make it to the end but not a chance he overcomes THESE odds!

2-Dolph Ziggler out next? Without looking, didn’t these two start a previous Rumble? Is my memory correct on that?

3-Sin Cara…is gone. See ya.

4-Curtis Axel comes out, and I see the opportunity to (again) use my patented Mr. Imperfect nickname for him. So blah.

5-Mark Henry is back in the ring, fresh off his WWE Hall of Fame induction. Must be a proud moment for him.

6-Mike Kanellis is the number six entrant. Truth be told, I never really cared for the guy. Regardless of his time in Ring Of Honor or Impact Wrestling, I didn’t ‘get it.’ It is awesome he has his life back on track and all that. No negativity there. That is fine. As a WWE Superstar on my television set…yawn.

7-Hiroki Sumi is out next. I guess Akebono was busy. No idea but part of the SURPRISE aspect of any Rumble.

8-Viktor will not last long. Nope.

9-Kofi Kingston is a fine addition to this match. Been all Bryan and Ziggler so far. Needs some more spice to the mix. The New Day music did get a sizable reaction in Saudi Arabia. Worldwide appeal, no doubt.

10-Tony Nese is cool. I don’t watch 205 Live but have seen some of his entertaining highlights on the WWE Youtube page.

11-Dash needs Dawson. Hopefully, he is next, and The Revival get a decent spotlight for the next twenty minutes.

12-Hornswoggle is not Dawson. At least I don’t think he is. This entrant was spoiled for me on Thursday; I have no problem with it. A quick one off on an international live special is nothing to whine and cry over. Remember Hornswoggle once eliminated The Miz from a Rumble, and he went on to win the WWE Title and headline WrestleMania, so yeah…

13-Primo is Primo.

14-Xavier Woods makes it two members of The New Day in there. Alright, is Big E entering soon? So long Tony Nese. Your abs can’t save you from that kind of stupidity.

15-Bo Dallas just gave me an excuse to use my other nickname, NO DALLAS! Those clowns as The Miztourage fit their act perfectly. I can not see any other role for them but punching bags.

16-Kurt Angle! Finally, let’s clean house and dump a bunch of bodies over the top rope. A staredown with Daniel Bryan NEEDS to happen as soon as possible. Do it WWE. Do it.

17-Dawson is a tad bit too late. Hornswoggle already got rid of Dash. I don’t imagine Dawson doing well on his own here. Kinda sucks Dolph Ziggler was eliminated by Angle without much fanfare but par the course for him. Kinda forgettable in 2018.

18-Goldust is always good to lend his veteran credentials. These entrants sure are coming fast. It said 90 second intervals; I doubt that has been followed thus far.

19-Konnor has entered the Royal Rumble. Ladies and gentlemen, WWE has to fill 50 slots. In case you have not noticed by now, the star power is extremely lacking. We knew that going on but wow…

20-Elias is about to walk with eliminations! Or something like that. Over 60,000 people in Saudi Arabia are big fans. Not a bad ‘dark horse’ prediction honestly.

21-Luke Gallows is sure in need of a reboot with Karl Anderson. On Smackdown LIVE away from Finn Balor? Uh oh. Hey, Bryan and Angle are going at it! Never thought I’d see it…and that’s all she wrote for the Olympic Gold Medalist. Elias with a lot of bragging rights there.

22-Rhyno is number twenty two. Quick note: I think we got what we should have suspected out of Kurt Angle. He had the big entrance, locked up with Bryan for a few moments and was eliminated by a fresh heel that can constantly mention it in Elias. Works for me.

23-Drew Gulak doesn’t have a Powerpoint presentation for the Greatest Royal Rumble, does he? No? Okay, he won’t win.

24-Tucker Knight is our next entrant. I get the appeal of Heavy Machinery in NXT but also understand the hesitation to move them past the comedy spot on the card.

25-Bobby Roode is on RAW and still GLORIOUS! Side note: I was interested in hearing his crowd reaction in Saudi Arabia. I assumed the theme music alone would garner a great reaction from the live crowd. Well, not so much.

26-Fandango comes out to crickets. Remember The Fashion Police with Tyler Breeze? Remember when everybody was in love with that garbage and claimed it was hilarious? I remember. Good times.

27-Chad Gable has loads of potential. I know many are skeptical of his RAW move (as am I), but I will give it time. With or without Jason Jordan, it is a new beginning for him. He is legitimate outside the squared circle and can absolutely wrestle.

28-Rey Mysterio! My brother in law will love this moment. Big fan of his and always excited to see him wrestle. I think a part-time special attraction return would be a win for both WWE and Mr. 619. Anything full-time in 2018 and beyond, no thanks.

29-Mojo Rawley baby! Another guy with a chance to do something on a new brand after the Superstar Shakeup. As a face, I didn’t like his super hyper personality. As a smug jock with flaunts his friendship with Gronk, I love it.

30-Tyler Breeze is in just as Fandango is out. Okay, funny moment there. Then he’s gone. Bryan is still in the match and appears to be heading for a new Rumble time record. Could he win?

31-Big E has pancakes. Oh my gosh, this stuff isn’t funny. I beg anybody in the comment section to tell me otherwise. Sorry if I keep on repeating myself, but The New Day have never been more dull. Still with the pancakes.

32-Karl Anderson is not Finn Balor, nor is he Luke Gallows. No way these are 90 second intervals…

33-Apollo Crews is a stud. His ceiling is sky high, and I don’t mean D’Lo Brown. I will take a quick moment and note that the commentators for this event have been pretty good. Only a few moments of bickering and pointless jokes.

34-Roderick Strong! Wow. I knew some NXT wrestlers would be on hand, but this is a genuine surprise. I suppose with Adam Cole in January’s Rumble, this is some kind of shocking symmetry. Roddy making the final four or something with Daniel Bryan would be a treat. Joining the Undisputed Era was a brilliant move, both kayfabe and not. He needed a spark, and a heel run will give him that.

35-Randy Orton is out at number thirty five as Roddy and Bryan chop each other into oblivion. Never thought you’d see that showdown in a WWE ring, huh? I doubt Mr. RKO wins, but he instantly adds credibility and excitement. Apollo, Apollo, Apollo!

36-Heath Slater is going to enter immediately I hope. We saw how his last Rumble went. Not too many people left. I have to think The Great Khali or Chris Jericho will be making their way to the ring soon.

37-Babatunde is not somebody I know. Dude is fast and tall. That is my first impression.

38-Baron Corbin is not my pick to win, but I can understand if WWE would want to go ‘all in’ with him once again. They got close in 2017 but pulled back. Likely the correct call then in hindsight. Is it now?

39-Titus O’Neil is ridiculous. Seriously, this guy. I can’t believe his luck. Good grief. I know the laughing on commentary and replays may have been harsh, but come on, you can’t ignore that buffoonery. Incredible. That is NOT making it a win Titus!

40-Dan Matha sure does run funny. No headfirst slide from him. Smart.

41-Braun Strowman is my official pick to win, for the record. Him, Lashley, and Bryan are the three I am focusing on. He is here to crush all of his opponents and stand tall at the end of the evening. New star made on a new stage.

42-Tye Dillinger is still on the main roster. Lucky the IIconics were placed on Smackdown Live. WOW! A bunch of eliminations, and Elias is stuck in there with Braun. Rapid fire.

43-Curt Hawkins stands no chance. Turn around now buddy.

44-Bobby Lashley will look strong, win or lose. Sad to see Elias go. Put up a good fight. Daniel Bryan hanging around ringside…I wonder if fans will complain about his napping skills like they did Roman Reigns years ago? Magic eight ball says no.

45-The Great Khali has arrived! How he can even move is a minor miracle. I doubt this lasts long. My three favorites remain: Lashley, Strowman, and Bryan…

46-Kevin Owens is out at number forty six. I forgot about him, to be honest. The commentators are talking about the giants in there with underdog Daniel Bryan. That makes me believe The Yes Man may actually win this entire thing from number one after all. Not budging from Braun though.

47-Shane McMahon is ready to rumble. This should be interesting. Despite his critics, he always delivers out there and does an outstanding job. Hasn’t won a single’s match on pay-per-view since August 2003 against Eric Bischoff!

48-Shelton Benjamin is another wrestler who could use the Superstar Shakeup to his advantage. WWE knows what they have with him, so you never know where the next 2017 Jinder Mahal like spotlight will emerge from.

49-Big Cass is number forty nine. That must mean Chris Jericho is entering last. Funny, those two actually started the 2017 Royal Rumble. For some reason, I remember that. No Sami Zayn? For what it’s worth, I wrote (on another website) the reason why Big Cass vs. Daniel Bryan at Backlash is a GOOD thing. Check that out.

50-Chris Jericho! Ever the opportunist to grab the final spot in the biggest Rumble ever. He sure knows how to pick his spots. I do like the jacket. Alright, everybody has entered. Will it be the Daniel Bryan story or a giant emerging victorious?

– Well, Big Cass may have broken his neck. The standing suplex from Lashley clearly didn’t go as planned. Scary stuff. I don’t know if it was fatigue or what. An audible should have been called after the first failed attempt.

– Shane McMahon was almost killed by Braun Strowman. Another stellar table destroyed by Shane O’Mac. That dude just does it! Hats off to him. If nobody else wants to give him his dues, I will.

– Bobby Lashley, Chris Jericho, and DANIEL BRYAN ELIMINATED!!!!!!!!!! I’m sure others will be upset, but this was the best outcome for him. Big Cass can yap about throwing the popular face out, and Bryan can claim to be the ultimate Royal Rumble Ironman. Heels being heels; he’ll get his at Backlash.

– Braun Strowman won in the end, dumping out Big Cass last. Not exactly a thrilling conclusion but fair enough. The new cocky giant got too big for his britches and was put in his place by the Monster Among Men. Braun was my pick, he gets the trophy spotlight and special moment in the ring afterwards with Vince McMahon. The five hour WWE Network live special ends with a popular star being crowned and history made in multiple ways.

SUMMARY: Nailed the predictions, so yay me. I’m the idiot though, so just ignore that fact as usual. In all seriousness, I enjoyed the five hour event. If you want to know how much WWE was paid, you must not be following me on Twitter. Money aside, how can you rip on this? It looked beautiful. Starting with Cena/HHH, a casket match with The Undertaker, multiple title matches and ending with a 50 man Royal Rumble! Super cool. My belief is that these kind of shows are the future. Mixed Match Challenge, Mae Young Classic, Greatest Royal Rumble, Australia In October, etc. The presentation will stay the same for weekly TV but outside of that bubble, all bets are off. I love it.

Cheap Plugs

Email: [email protected]

Twitter: @JustinWatry

noahwatry.com

Thanks.