The World According to Ron: Wrestling Thoughts & Favorite Games

DANIEL BRYAN TURNS HEEL ON SHANE MCMAHON
As I wrote [two weeks ago], this would be the most preferable result for me, as long as it’s more than just your usual “Shane McMahon smells funny, so I must beat him up, ha ha!” If he turns, it should be because he agrees with Smai Zayn and Kevin OwenSteen, that Shane McMahon has gone crazy with power. However, if this happens, Shane should remain the face of the group. He was going for his final revenge for KO/Sami creating havoc upon his neatly ordered brand, and thanks to Daniel Bryan, he must now wait for justice.

Bryan, meanwhile, has realized he agrees with KO/Sami. After all, they have a common background, with all of them fighting their ways up through “the independents” for years before getting their shots at the Big Time. In contrast, Shane McMahon, as the saying goes, was born on third base and thinks he hit a triple. He didn’t have to fight his way up through the ranks to achieve his standing in the company. Heck, he lost a match against The Undertaker, and as a consolation prize, his father gave him half the company. Now, he has the audacity to complain about two guys that are simply trying to preserve their places in the company that they have fought so hard to achieve? Kevin and Sami are simply fighting The Man. Cue John Cougar singing “When I fight Authority, Authority always wins!”

That was something I wrote for last week’s WATR, which unfortunately was sent too late to the Powers That Be Here at 411, so it got into the rotation too late to be relevant. I had three possible outcomes to the Owens/Zayn v Orton/Nakamura match at Clash of Champions. The other two possibilities I had were “Owens and Zayn Turn Face” and “Shane McMahon Turns Heel.” This was what I hoped was the most likely result, and I can really hope they stay on this course. If you look at those options, by the way, you will notice I never even considered the possibility of either Shinsuke Nakamura or Randy Orton turning on each other. I know a few people did, but those people are doodyheads.

By the way, that was a catch. Jesse James knew it was a catch, Ben Roethlisberger knew it was a catch, Tom Brady knew it was a catch, Bill Belichick knew it was a catch, the referees on the field knew it was a catch. You know who else knew it was a catch? The replay officials in New York and Roger Goodell. Patriots fans can tell me all they want that Goodell hates their team, but for some strange reason, they seem to benefit from League office decisions more than other teams.

The Patriots have now been involved in replay calls on touchdowns late in games three times this season. Two of them, against the Jets and Pittsburgh, were overturned, and the Patriots win. For the other one, against Houston, a touchdown by Brandin Cooks of New England was allowed to stand, even though he lost the ball after going out of bounds (which, when interpreted the same way as the James catch, would mean he didn’t maintain control through the catch), and the Patriots win. All three calls were reviewed by the same person: Alberto Riveron, the NFL’s senior vice president of officiating. I know, I know, I’m just upset my team lost. I also know that the Steelers defense couldn’t cover Rob Gronkowski in the last two minutes, the Steelers dropped an interception with 2:01 left, and that Roethlisberger threw an interception with five seconds to go. But if the James touchdown stands, that last pass doesn’t happen.

Yes, I will continue to complain until they meet again in late January. Probably in Foxboro, because of all the reasons I talked about in the previous paragraph.

I need to stop talking about this stuff. I’m depressed as it is. Let’s move on, shall we?

DIDN’T YOU USED TO DO SOMETHING SPECIAL FOR THE HOLIDAYS?

In 2001, when I was in my first stint writing for 411Wrestling.com, waaaaay back when the site just focused on wrestling, there was a crisis on December 23. The entire site went kablooey, and everything disappeared. There was a call from the management for any kind of content. Since I had nothing new to add wrestling-wise (I think my column had been up for a couple days, and nothing new had happened since), I decided to write on another topic which was also close to my heart — my favorite comic book stories. After that, I wrote a non-wrestling column every Christmas Eve, listing my favorite things of whatever. One year it was my favorite albums, another year, my favorite tv shows. This year, to celebrate my re-emergence from hibernation, I bring to you my favorite board games.

Just a couple points of clarification. These are all games that are in my personal collection. I currently have over 400 games, and among people I know, that is in the middle. I know a couple people whose collections are in the thousands, but I’m happy where I am right now. Don’t get me wrong: there are other games out there that I want, but if I don’t get them any time soon, I’m okay with that.

There are some games known as “gateway games,” which are just what they sound like: you play these games as a way to get further into the hobby. Most people include The Settlers of Catan (now known simply as Catan), Ticket to Ride, Alhambra, and Carcassonne. There are others included on various lists, but those four are almost universally recognized as gateway games. For that reason, I am not including those games, or any variations of them. There are a few variations I would include, like Settlers of America: Trails to Rails, Ticket to Ride: United Kingdom/Pennsylvania, Alhambra: the Dice Game, or Carcassonne: The Castle, but that would be cheating.

Also, this is not a top ten list. I have no idea how many games will make the final cut as I write this. It may be ten, but probably not. For each of the games in the list, you will see in parentheses the year the game was first released, the designer(s), the number of players, and the ranking on the web site BoardGameGeek.com. Some of the games that did not make the final cut are 13 Days: The Cuban Missile Crisis, 7 Wonders Duel, Bolide, Café International, Dominion, The End of the Triumvirate, Fürstenfeld, I’m the Boss!, The Inventors, Die Macher, Scotland Yard, Stone Age, and Wallenstein.

Now, in alphabetical/numerical order, I present to you (Trumpets!) My Super-Dee-Duper Extra Special Holy Crom These Are Wonderful Recommended Games List!

6 nimmt! (1994; Wolfgang Kramer; 2-10 players; 563) – The game consists of a deck of cards numbered 1 through 104. All players are dealt ten cards, followed by placing four cards on the table (8, 31, 47, 84, for example). All players chose cards from their hands, and flip them face up simultaneously (for a six-player game, we’ll use cards 18, 19, 40, 65, 71, and 95). The cards are then placed on the board by chronological order. When all cards are placed in the example, the top row will hold 8, 18, and 19; the second row will hold 31, and 40; the third row will hold 47, 65, and 71; and the final row will hold 84 and 95. After the next cards are flipped over, they will be placed in the rows according to cards 19, 40, 71, and 95. As long as a row has five cards or less, things are fine. If a player plays what would become the sixth card in a row, the player takes the first five cards in his scoring pile, and the sixth card becomes the new first card in a row. Each card also has anywhere from one through seven bull heads on it. At the end of the round, players count the bull heads on cards in their scoring piles; this is their score for the round. Players may either play one round, or play until one player reaches 66 points; either way, the low score wins. 6 nimmt! won the 1994 Deutscher Spiele Preis Game of the Year in Germany.

7 Wonders (2010; Antoine Bauza; 2-7 players; 39) – Players choose one of the Wonders of the Ancient World (there are fourteen in the base game, but many others are included with expansion packs). Each wonder can be built in two, three, or four stages, using different resources (like stone, glass, or papyrus). At the beginning of each of three ages, players are dealt a hand of seven cards. A player chooses a card with (a) a resource, (b) a building, which are built using resources; or (c) knowledge, which, like buildings, can be used as prerequisites to build other things. After choosing a card, the player then passes the hand to the right or left, depending on the round, and chooses a card from the new hand. 7 Wonders won many awards, including 2010 Tric Trac d’or Game of the Year in France, 2011 Kennerspiel des Jahres (Connoisseur’s Game of the Year) in Germany, and 2011 Vuoden Aikuistenpeli Game of the Year in Finland.

Axis & Allies (1981; Larry Harris, Jr.; 2-5 players; 1174) – This is not the earliest “war game beyond Risk,” nor is it the toughest, but it is the best known. There are five armies in this World War II re-enactment, with Germany and Japan as the Axis, and the Soviet Union, United Kingdom, and United States as the Allies. In the original game, either side can win by taking over two enemy capitals, or the Axis can also win by economic victory. In the 2004 remake, Avalon Hill added the “Victory Cities” condition, in which one side can win by taking over two, four, or all six of the opposition’s major cities. The A&A game system has been implemented in many variations, including Europe and Pacific 1940, 1941 and 1942 base games, D-Day, Battle of the Bulge, Guadalcanal, the Anniversary Edition (which adds Italy), World War I, and even miniatures.

Chinatown (1999; Karsten Hartwig; 3-5 players; 354) – Chinatown has been recommended, along with another game on this list, as a much better economic game than Monopoly. Each player is a landlord in the Chinatown district of a major city. Players are given different lots in the town, as well as different types of businesses. The lots and businesses are all dealt randomly, so players must trade to get lots closer together, and same types of businesses. The bigger the business, the more it pays at the end of each round. After six rounds, the player with the most money wins.

Colosseum (2007; Wolfgang Kramer and Markus Lübke; 3-5 players; 342) – It’s not often you find a game which uses the famous line from Andy Hardy movies of the 1940s — “Hey, kids! Let’s put on a show!” — as inspiration, but Colosseum does just that. Players are managers of arenas in ancient Rome, trying to put on bigger and bigger spectacles to achieve bigger audiences. The bigger the spectacle, the bigger the crowd, and the bigger the crowd, the bigger the profit, and the bigger the profit, the bigger the expenditures for the next show. There are thirty shows from which to choose, each with its own requisite elements, like animals, actors, and scenery. Managers bid for elements in random groups of three, then may trade them with others to put on a more complete performance. The more complete the play, the more you make in profits. Managers may also try to maneuver Roman senators and the Emperor to come see their shows, which also help to attract bigger crowds. Scores do not accumulate, so whoever has the highest scoring show in the fifth and final round wins the game.

Divided Republic (2012; Alex Bagosy; 2-4 players; 3925) -There are many two player games, like 13 Days: The Cuban Missile Crisis, Twilight Struggle, and 1960: The Making of the President that use the same kind of gameplay, using cards that can be used as events or cube placement, and in some cases, both. Divided Republic takes the same gameplay and uses it for the US Presidential election of 1860, only instead of being a two-player game like all the others, this is a four-player game. Players are either Abraham Lincoln (Republican), John Breckenridge (Southern Democrat), Stephen Douglas (Northern Democrat), or John Bell (Constitutional Union). The game mirrors the actual election, in that Lincoln is not on any ballots in what will be the Confederate States of America, with the possible exception of South Carolina (under a specific situation), and that candidates do not campaign for themselves (oh, if only this were still true…).

The Godfather: Corleone’s Empire (2017; Eric M. Lang; 2-5 players; 527) – This is the newest game on my list. It is based on the movie from 1973. Do you see those pieces lying down on the picture? Those pieces represent characters that are napping in the East River or the Hudson River, if you get my drift. Each player is the leader of a certain group of Respectable Businessmen, and the tokens are their loyal helpers. Players send pawns to different spaces on the board, which gain the players either favors, money, or materials to help later in the round or the game. Helpers work to gain control of territory, while trying to avoid drive-by shootings or car bombs. At the end of each round, players bid on more influential helpers, like labor leaders, policemen, or even the mayor. The losers will pledge their loyalty to the new Godfather, while the winner will be on their way to a fatal heart attack in a vegetable garden. Sorry. Spoiler alert!

Lifeboats (1993; Ronald Wettering; 3-6 players; 1161) – People say Diplomacy is The Game that Ruins Friendships, but I would guess they have never played Lifeboats. I have heard of people rage-quitting, and even table-flipping, but Lifeboats was responsible for the closest I have ever come to seeing an actual fistfight start over a game. It plays well with three, four, or five, but six players is the best, and leads to greater chaos. The game starts with a number of lifeboats (equal to the number of players plus one), and each player starts with seven pawns (five sailors and two captains). Players place pawns in the different lifeboats and then try to make it to different deserted islands at the other end of the board. Each round has three phases. First, players vote to decide which of the lifeboats springs a leak. If there are no empty seats on the boat, the passengers decide which pawn is thrown overboard. Next, players vote on which boat moves one space toward the island (moving three spaces means the boat has arrived, and all passengers are safe). Finally, beginning with the start player for that round, there is a “fire drill” phase, where one pawn of each color jumps off a boat, then must climb back on another boat. If the last pawn can only get back on the same boat, the pawn is out of play (or, to stay thematic, goes to Davy Jones’ Locker.) If there are more leaks than passengers on any boat at the end of a phase, that boat sinks. After all boats have either arrived or, well, not, each pawn that arrived safely scores points, and the high score wins.

Pandemic (2008; Matt Leacock; 2-4 players; 65) – This game has gotten more attention in recent years for two reasons. One would be the expansion of the concept, including Pandemic Legacy (in which events from the first time you play the game will affect game play in the tenth game, just like a video game), which is now the highest-ranked game on BoardGameGeek.com (a score of 8.499 out of 10). Another reason this is getting more attention is the theme itself. In this co-operative game, there are four separate diseases with outbreaks around the world. You and your teammates start from the Centers for Disease Control in Atlanta and fly around the world, trying to treat the afflicted, prevent further outbreaks, and find cures. You win by finding cures to all four diseases. You lose by letting a disease get out of control, running out of time, or suffering too many outbreaks. I’m sure there is probably seven or eight more ways to lose, but still only one way to win. Pandemic won many awards in 2009, including Game of the Year in Brazil, Belgium and Australia.

Parthenon: Rise of the Aegean (2005; Jason Hawkins and Andrew Parks; 3-6 players; 2573) – For many years, this has been in my top games, as well as my favorite game that is either unknown or underappreciated by gamers. There have been many “trading on the Mediterranean Sea” games, but I believe this was the first. Also, if you can’t find six players, try to limit it to three; the rules to balance out gameplay for four or five players are not good. Each player starts as the leader of one of six Greek islands — Chios, Crete, Lemnos, Naxos, Rhodes, or Scyros — and need to build six Villages and two Workshops (for different goods), six Metropolis buildings (for different community effects), and two Wonders to win the game. Each island starts with two villages which each grow a different common good, like olives, wood, or wool. Players need to trade with each other to get goods not produced on their islands, because the price of the workshop buildings, which produce rare goods, is one of each of the six common goods. Players may also sail to neighboring lands — Athens, Ionia, or Sparta — or foreign lands — Carthage, Egypt, or Italy. Sailing to foreign lands are riskier, but they also allow for better trading. While sailing, ships may encounter pirates, stoms, blockades, taxes, and goods shortages or surpluses. After returning from trading, islands may build different buildings for more goods or benefits. There is also the Archon, who acts like the first player (although most play is simultaneous), who breaks ties, settles disputes, and decides how long to allow for island trading, among other things. Parthenon was named 2006 Origins Game Fair Game of the Year, and my copy is signed by Hawkins, Parks, and Z-Man Games’ then-owner Zev Schlasinger.

Power Grid (2004; Friedemann Friese; 2-6 players; 25) – Power Grid started life as Funkenschlag, a train game. After re-theming the game, it is now another economic replacement for Monopoly. Each turn has five steps. Players start by bidding for power plants, using either coal, oil, trash (the later Deluxe version changed this to natural gas), nuclear, wind, or fusion power. The next step is to buy the appropriate fuel for the plant. Next, players supply power to different cities. Step Four requires using materials to fuel the plants, and in Step Five, players receive money for each city powered. In Phase One, each city will have only one supplier; Phase Two will allow a second supplier per city, and in Phase Three, a third supplier may move in. End game is triggered depending on the number of players (for six players, a person building into a 15th city will trigger end game, while for two players, you need 21 cities). The winner is the person who powers the most cities; ties are broken by money. The base game has maps for US and Germany, but has expansions (and separate rules variations) for France, Italy, Russia, Australia, Japan, Brazil, and many other countries.

Tammany Hall (2007; Doug Eckhart; 3-5 players; 544) – Tammany Hall was a political machine in New York City from the 1790’s through the 1960s. The power of Tammany Hall can be seen in the movie “The Gangs of New York.” Tammany’s best known leader was William “Boss” Tweed, who was in charge in the 1850s through 1872, when he was arrested on corruption charges. The game Tammany Hall takes place in this same era. The first four rounds (equivalent to four years) involve trying to gain political support from different ethnic grops in Manhattan (English, Irish, Italians, Germans). After the fourth year, there is a mayoral election. The player with the most votes becomes Mayor of New York, and places others in political positions (Deputy Mayor, Council President, Chief of Police, Precinct Chairman). The Mayor is the first player in each round, but it is also the weakest office in the game. The other offices allow players to gain political favors, close a political ward, move an immigrant from one ward to a neighboring ward, or even remove the immigrant from the board altogether. After four elections, players add up their final scores, and the high scorer takes over for Boss Tweed while he lives his final years in prison.

Thunder Alley (2014; Jeff Horger and Carla Horger; 2-7 players; 515) – There are a few games on this list of which I have met the designers. In the interest of full disclosure, Jeff and Carla Horger are two I have known personally for a few years. When I lived in Columbus, we were all members (and they still are) of the Columbus Area Boardgaming Society, the largest boardgaming club in the world, with over 600 members. They have developed a few games, but this is my favorite. It is based on the racing system that uses stock cars, but is definitely not NASCAR; just ask the lawyers. The big difference is that in most racing games, players control one car. In Thunder Alley, players control an entire team. A player gets cards equal to the number of cars on the team, plus one. Cards allow a player to move in one of four ways: move an entire row of cars, move all cars in front of the active car, move all cars behind the active car, or move the active car solo. The race goes a set number of laps, and each car gets points according to order of finish; the team with the highest score wins. The base game comes with four tracks, but there is an expansion pack with another five. When you add in the Horger’s based-on-but-not Formula One game Grand Prix, there are a total of thirteen tracks to run a complete season.

Wits & Wagers (2005; Dominic Crapuchettes; 3-7 players/teams; 493) – Finally, a party game! Finally, a trivia game! Finally, a betting game! Really, it’s all three at once. A game consists of seven questions. For example, “How many pennies were minted in the US in 2015?” Each player (or team) writes an answer down, then places their dry erase board upside down on the playmat. When all guesses are in, boards are flipped up and arranged from smallest to largest. Players then have thirty seconds to place bets on the closest-but-not-over answer. The answer in the middle pays off at 2-1 odds, while the smallest and largest answers pay off at 5-1, and “Smaller Than All Given Answers” pays 6-1. After all bets are in, the player(s) that bet on the correct answer get their payoffs, and the player that supplied the winning answer gets a two-chip bonus. After seven questions, whoever has the highest chip count wins. By the way, if you said the US minted 9,365,400,000 pennies in 2015, you would be over by 100,000.

For the record, I will gladly play most games when asked (there are a few you shouldn’t ask me about like Agricola and Caverna, because I will bite your nose off and then smite in your face). If you ask me to pick a game, I will most likely grab one of those I’ve listed, but some others might make their way onto the table. I hope this helps you if you decide you want to try something new, when your X Station U 64 breaks down or your Intertubes go offline. You want to go Old School? I mean really Old School? Don’t push buttons, push some cardboard! Go visit your Friendly Local Game Store today!

Here endeth the advertisement.

DIDN’T YOU ASK A QUESTION?

Why, yes. Yes, I did. Hold on a second…

This is from two weeks ago, so please excuse the “this week” reference.

“This week, Broken Matt Hardy made his first appearance on Raw, after being McMahonicized, as ‘Woken Matt Hardy.’ What will be the next former TNA gimmick to make an appearance on Monday or Tuesday night? Explain THAT?!?”

I was rooting for Zoidberg to pull off the double, but even he admits, “Damnit. One Laurel and Hearty handshake is all I’m gonna get.” At least right now, but who knows what the future holds…

For this week, the win goes to DavexG, who wrote, “Welllllllll, they’ve already knocked off so much TNA we’ve gotta go left field so I’m going with having Samoa Joe kidnapped by ninjas because they don’t know what to do with him and management said ‘do Something!'”

Do not rest on, um, whatever you would rest on, DavexG, because there is another challenge coming up in five, four, three, two…

First, there was “Have a Nice Day!: A Tale of Blood and Sweatsocks.” This was followed by “Foley is Good: And the Real World is Faker Than Wrestling,” “The Hardcore Diaries,” and “Countdown to Lockdown: A Hardcore Journal.” Now comes word that Mick Foley is writing another memoir, “Saint Mick: My Journey From Hardcore Legend to Santa’s Jolly Elf.” If (“If?”) When he writes another memoir, what will it be called, and what will it be about? Explain THAT?!?

Have a Merry Something and a Happy Whatever.

#SavetheCrew

Ron