Wrestling’s 4Rs: The Right, Wrong and Ridiculous of Impact & Smackdown

How the 4Rs of wRestling Work!
Here is a quick explanation of the 4R’s. The column will run TWO times a week. We will group our feelings on the shows in various categories: The Right, the wRong and the Ridiculous. The Right is stuff that worked very well: a great promo, a great match and so on. PuRgatoRy is a section between the right and wrong. It shows equal traits from both sides that cannot be ignored and needs discussed. It is not a bad place per say, as things can get remedied or go the wrong way the very next week. The wRong is what it sounds like: bad matches, bad or boring promos and so on. The Ridiculous is stuff that had no right on TV: Stupid angles and so on. And there is always a possibility of a 5th R, which is as bad as they come. This column is supposed to be analytical, and at the right time very critical of the shows, it was the whole reason it was created. This is not a “mark” column, nor a “smark” column, our goal is to analyze the show from many different fronts, reward the good and call out the bad. We will not apologize for our opinions, they are as they are, whether positive or negative.

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By Jack McGee
Smackdown 1.22.15
QUICK MATCH RESULTS:
* In a Non-Title match, Dolph Ziggler defeated Champion Wade Barrett via pin to earn a spot in the Royal Rumble (9:40)
* In a Non-Title match, Ryback defeated Champion Rusev to earn a spot in the Royal Rumble (12:55)
* Brie Bella defeated Naomi via pin (2:18)
* Luke Harper defeated Erick Rowan to stop him from getting a spot in the Royal Rumble thusly crushing his dreams (3:23)
* Daniel Bryan defeated Kane in a no DQ match to earn a spot in the Royal Rumble (11:30)

THE RIGHT:
The Usos Play Mind Tricks With Sandow: It has been clear for some time that the fans love Sandow in his stunt double role, and they love to hate Miz. The other thing that we all know is that this gimmick cannot last forever, and that the split needs to come soon. Many have speculated that the Rumble will be where Sandow tosses Miz and the official split happens. I felt that the Usos laying the mind fuck on Sandow after his little argument with Miz was well played and well timed on two levels. First of all it plays into the story I was just discussing, and secondly the Usos are defending the tag titles against Miz and Sandow on Sunday. They want to cause dissention in the ranks prior to that, so they pump up Sandow and tell him he can be a star, which will hopefully cause issues during the tag team match. It was short and simple, and it worked.

Harper vs. Rowan: This was set up with the return of the three fired stars, Rowan, Ziggler and Ryback. I liked that Rowan lost here. First of all Harper gets the clean win, which he needs. Secondly, not all the good guys always win, so having one of them fail is a nice change. Thirdly, Rowan is not that good and has been booked like shit. Harper has way more upside, so I liked him winning here. The match was kept short, and was generally fine. They worked hard and I didn’t hate it.

Daniel Bryan vs. Kane – SHOW ENDING BRAWL: The main event, and hook for the show was the Daniel Bryan vs. Kane match. This was another match that was part of the show’s focus on the Rumble, as Bryan’s spot in the match was on the line. Much like last week, this wasn’t a great match or anything you’ll remember, but as I said before Bryan tends to get the best out of Kane and Kane seems to work really hard when in the ring with Bryan. The match was good, Bryan secured his spot in the Rumble and then we got the show-ending brawl that most expected on Raw. This was a satisfying ending to a solid edition of Smackdown.

puRgatoRy:
Show Opening Segment: This week’s show opening promo actually felt as if there was a real purpose behind it. Bryan was in the main event and got to put over his issues and match with Kane, and then transitioned into welcoming back Ziggler, Rowan and Ryback. These are all good things. But it ended up falling back into the same opening segment formula that seems to plague every main WWE show, and then it went too long. Big Show, Rollins and Kane were all like, “wrestle, wrestle, wrestle…. Rumble. Is this working?” They said words, used shit verbiage like “mole hamster”, and I did not care. They also didn’t even explain the Rumble Qualifying matches in the segment; they had to leave that to Michael Cole because they announced it “during the break”. If you’re going to talk for nearly 20-fucking minutes, please get all of your points across.

Rusev vs. Ryback: First of all, we once again had importance placed on the Rumble by having this be a Rumble qualifier. It also plays off of the established angle with Rusev, Ziggler and Rowan returning. I will also say, they had a really good match. I have been enjoying Rusev’s work, and this was the best Ryback match I have watched in a long time. The Big Guy usually isn’t bad, but he gets repetitive and then the matches feel that they drag. They had a damn fine hoss battle, I really liked it and it never felt as long as it actually was. But the problem, for me, is that the booking feels as if it is stalling with Rusev. I like Rusev a lot and feel as if he has done very well, but in a match like this we all knew the finish because they aren’t beating him at this time. I feel as if we’re seeing the same finish over and over again. I know whey they booked the match, but in this case I feel they would have been better off booking Ryback into another match, maybe even a handicap match, he makes the improbable comeback and then Rusev runs out to cause a DQ or just tries the post match attack. Maybe let then have a wild brawl after the match that Ryback survived. I just was a bit of variety.

THE wRong:
Byron Saxton: With the mix up of the announce teams, they decided that they were going to try and give Byron Saxton a heel personality this week. He constantly defended the Authority, noting that Ziggler, Ryback and Rowan were only getting what they deserved, while Harper, Rusev and Barrett were in good standing because they were aligned with the Authority. There were two problems with this. First of all, it feels so rushed. We’re just getting to know Saxton as an announcer, and he just jumps onto Team Authority with no real explanation. Secondly, he’s not good. He feels so forced and like he’s simply reading the lines being yelled at him from backstage. I hope he improves, but he was really rough this week and it’s not like WWE commentary is good anyway.

Wade Barrett vs. Dolph Ziggler: Ziggler vs. Barrett was a quality match, that played off of their already established storyline and the importance of the Rumble as it was also a qualifier for Ziggler. I really do appreciate these things, and while I would love to put this in purgatory, it ended up in the wrong. It’s just not the fact that Barrett lost, it’s the fact that he lost once again. Yes he won the title over Ziggler through nefarious means. But, the fact was that he was the champion and only lost the title due to his injury. I had no issue with him dicking Ziggler to get the title back, but losing to Sin Cara and Dean Ambrose since then on TV, clean, completely devalues him. Barrett should have been kept strong, and then when Ziggler won here, you can play up the fact that Ziggler has his number and that Barrett only beat him because of the Authority’s backing. It’s not a hard story to tell, they have it sitting right there, but they have opted to abuse the IC Title and who ever is holding it.

THE Ridiculous:
Naomi vs. Brie Bella: First of all, Naomi goes from feuding with Alicia to being thrown out there to lose because she looks great doing so. Secondly, the commentary largely ignored the match to talk with Paige and Natalya at ringside. Yes this was in part to sell the tag match at the Rumble, but when the match is so short, it comes off as if they are ignoring the match. And finally, the ladies get boned on time yet again this week. I almost would rather the didn’t have them on the show at all if all we can do over the last three weeks on Smackdown is allow them to max out at around 2 minutes and 18 seconds. But remember, they get time on Total Divas. My hate for the way the main roster presents the women continues to grow with each week.

The 411:
Overall the show was focused on selling the Rumble which was appreciated it is something that Raw should have been as well, but Smackdown still had it’s issues. The IC Champion losing again, Rusev in another DQ/Non-finish style match, the ladies getting completely screwed on time; all symptoms of the WWE homogenized product. It was far from a bad show, there was plenty to enjoy, but it’s hard to overlook the same issues that constantly pop up. The good news is that while Smackdown has its issues, the show isn’t nearly as infuriating as Raw can be.

Show Rating: 6.5

As a reminder, I will be going by the 411 scale…

0 – 0.9: Torture
1 – 1.9: Extremely Horrendous
2 – 2.9: Very Bad
3 – 3.9: Bad
4 – 4.9: Poor
5 – 5.9: Not So Good
6 – 6.9: Average
7 – 7.9: Good
8 – 8.9:Very Good
9 – 9.9: Amazing
10: Virtually Perfect

By Jericho Ricardi
Impact 1.23.15
QUICK MATCH RESULTS:
* Feast or Fired went to 7:00 with Velvet Sky/Robbie E, Spud, Austin Aries, and Magnus obtaining cases
* Lashley def. Kenny King at 3:00 via DQ
* Gail Kim def. Havok at 5:00 via DQ
* Koya def. Tigre Uno at 1:00 via pin (Sky High)
* Low-Ki and Eric Young def. Bobby Roode and Kurt Angle at 5:00 via pin (Ki rolls up Roode)
* EC3 Vs. Jeremy Borash went to a no-contest at 2:00
* Matt Hardy def. James Storm at 5:00 via pin (roll up)

THE RIGHT:
The Feast or Fired Match: This match was a lot of fun, with a number of great spots revolving around case-grabs. Aries feigning a dive, then going for a case, and then diving anyway. Spud climbing on Sam Shaw to reach a case. Velvet inadvertently grabbing one as Robbie E nearly killed both of them carrying her down. Magnus essentially screwing Bram out of a case, because while Bram sees him as a brother, Magnus is about Magnus. All four grabs were well-done and furthered something story-wise. While it isn’t my personal favorite concept, Feast or Fired is compelling and they could honestly do a TV special based around it once a year. Thanksgiving would be the best time since it falls squarely into that post-BFG doldrums that they usually go through.

The Feast or Fired Ceremony: This was a breakout performance by Robbie E. Aries was cool as usual, and Spud brought the comedy. On the other hand, Magnus had the look of a guy who is just bored at this point. The choices for winners were all good and appropriate: Spud can challenge for the X-Division title with hometown support in one of the UK shows, Magnus and Bram can break up over the tag team title shot (also with hometown crowd involvement), and in the long term Aries can go for the world title at some point. All of that said, Aries may have won the world title shot, but Robbie E is the one who came out of this looking like a million bucks.

Dynamic camera angles: I’ve been liking the match camerawork a lot more as of late. It’s a little shaky, but not too much so, and it really gives the feeling of being right there in the ring during the matches. Keep doing this.

BDC Vs. The USA-Canada Alliance: Tag matches like this are what the company should be doing to further these feuds, rather than giving away EY Vs. Roode one-on-one right away like they did. This was a perfectly acceptable match, though I worry about whether or not Low Ki being X-Division champion is a good thing if he’s mostly going to be involved with the BDC rather than defending the title one-on-one. I don’t want to see him start getting pinned in non-title situations. That wasn’t the case here, though. I didn’t like Roode losing to a fairly weak chair-drop, but it wasn’t enough to ruin the whole deal.

Ethan Carter III Vs. J-Bizzle: No, seriously, this was awesome you guys. Keeping EC3 engaged like this while he’s injured is a great move. Borash is also putting his all into this feud, standing up for himself even though he’s way outmatched. EC3 is the best thing the company has going right now, as he has organically developed into a real star. JB was extremely over with the live crowd at the NYC taping that I went to, as was EC3, and this should be a good mini-feud. People bashing this because “EC3 is feuding with an announcer” need to look at the bigger picture: He’s injured, and him doing something entertaining like this is waaaay better for him (and the viewers) than sitting at home doing nothing. Bonus points for EC3 doing his own match commentary. The fans have made this guy the star of the show, and his inevitable world title reign should be fun.

A Literal New York Street Fight: One more good segment to end a show full of good segments, the gritty street brawl between Lashley and MVP felt pretty real. I wouldn’t be surprised if this turned into an NWO invasion type situation where nearby residents called the police, thinking there was an actual street fight going on. Ending with Bobby Roode picking up the title and looking at it was a good touch. When it comes to making the title seem important, the company has done everything right over the past couple years.

puRgatoRy:
King Vs. Lashley: This match was decent for what it was, but I feel like it’s a bad move to be sacrificing Kenny King like this. King may not have been pinned before the schmozz ending, but we all know the match was over. King is a really talented guy who hasn’t won a match (or had a competitive showcase) in ages; having him just be MVP’s job-goon is doing him a disservice.

Matt Hardy versus James Storm: On one hand, I feel like Matt Hardy has no business pinning James Storm at this point in time. Then again, it was a lucky roll-up win and it put more tension on their upcoming tag team war. The match was fine, but James Storm is another guy who deserves better than he’s getting.

Havok throws Gail Kim around: This served the purpose of leading to another confrontation with Awesome Kong, and thus accomplished something, but the match was bad. It was the latest in a series of instances of TNA’s best Knockout repeatedly putting over other people. Gail Kim should be getting set up to take on the winner of the Havok/Kong showdown, not getting stomped on by Havok regularly. And what’s going on with Taryn? Why does she even have the belt right now if the focus is all on Havok/Kong?

Lashley Talked: What did I tell you guys? Lashley shouldn’t talk. I worry that losing MVP as his manager is going to hurt Lashley in the long run, even though I like him as a badass good guy. If it were up to me, I’d have him form a temporary alliance with Roode and Angle just so that they can do the talking during promos. Only reason this is in Purgatory is because it was kept to a minimum, and again, he kinda had to talk.

THE wRong:
Match Finishes: There were way too many DQ finishes and roll-ups tonight. Fluke wins and non-endings don’t really do much for anyone involved; I don’t want to see them go back to their old ways of having this be the norm rather than wins via finisher. I get that they’re holding off on the decisive finishes until the next special event (Lockdown) but it was still a bit much for a single episode.

Still don’t like the lighting: I went into this a lot last week, so no need to continue it here. Not being able to see the crowd is still a mistake; It still makes the show look small-time (since there might as well be two rows of people there). I realize that the next several shows are already in the can, but I really, really hope they change the lighting back to normal for the UK shows.

Split-Screen Isn’t Working: Taking the focus off the match (and reducing the match to a small window) isn’t a good look. As much as I like seeing Taz back there eating chips and pulling a “Cartmanbrah”, it just isn’t needed and I think they should either scrap the idea or keep it to a bare minimum.

THE Ridiculous:
Tigre Uno gets squashed: Tigre Uno is the only pure luchadore on the roster and could be a valuable part of the show. Especially the X-Division. And yet they only trot him out when they need a jobber, usually to someone much bigger than he is. When they want a guy to lose in a short, completely unnecessary match, WWE has the IC champion, and TNA has Tigre Uno. Koya has a lot of potential and could fill the “agile giant” role left vacant by Matt Morgan and Hernandez. He SHOULD be crushing his opposition. But why misuse Tigre Uno like this? Tigre Uno should be a formidable X-Division contender, putting on clinic matches against other guys in that group. Using him as a jobber in one-minute squashes just seems like something Vince Russo would do in late-game WCW.

The 411:
This show was pretty excellent, probably the best yet on the new network. While I have issues with some of the booking choices, there wasn’t a single boring segment on this entire show and everyone seems to have a storyline or general direction going for them. But it wasn’t all good: The Tigre Uno misuse is moronic, and the Havok/Kim match wasn’t good, and they need to go back to proper match finishes, stat. All of that said, top notch show that innovated quite a bit towards the end, and I hope they keep going with this level of quality.

Cheap plug time, support this site and this column by sharing it with your homies. Also, support my site Coronajumper.com by reading my musings on video games, including TNA Impact for the PS2/PS3. Featuring gratuitous Rebel.

Show Rating: 8.6

As a reminder, I will be going by the 411 scale…

0 – 0.9: Torture
1 – 1.9: Extremely Horrendous
2 – 2.9: Very Bad
3 – 3.9: Bad
4 – 4.9: Poor
5 – 5.9: Not So Good
6 – 6.9: Average
7 – 7.9: Good
8 – 8.9:Very Good
9 – 9.9: Amazing
10: Virtually Perfect

The 959th edition is over…

“When some wild-eyed, eight-foot-tall maniac grabs your neck, taps the back of your favorite head up against the barroom wall, and he looks you crooked in the eye and he asks you if ya paid your dues, you just stare that big sucker right back in the eye, and you remember what ol’ Jack Burton always says at a time like that: “Have ya paid your dues, Jack?” “Yessir, the check is in the mail.”