wrestling / TV Reports
Csonka’s Impact Wrestling vs. UK 2018 Review
Csonka’s Impact Wrestling vs. UK 2018 Review
OFFICIAL RESULTS
– Rich Swann defeated Matt Sydal and Trevor Lee @ 8:48 via pin [**¾]
– Maxted & Robbie X defeated McCluskey & Steel @ 11:15 via pin [***½]
– Su Yung defeated Lana Austin @ 10:40 via pin [***]
– IMPACT Tag Team Championship Match: Champions LAX defeated Jody Fleisch & Jonny Storm @ 15:40 via pin [****]
– Joe Hendry defeated Eli Drake @ 8:05 via pin [**½]
– Eddie Edwards & Justin Sysum defeated Moose & Nathan Cruz @ 18:00 via pin [***¾]
– Barbed Wire Baseball Bat Death Match: Sami Callihan defeated Jimmy Havoc @ 17:51 via pin [****]
– Follow all of my reviews at this link.
– I did a column, “Where Are They Now, The Cruiserweight Classic Finals Performers” which you can check out at this link.
– You can check out my top 51 matches of AUGUST list at this link.
Rich Swann vs. Matt Sydal vs. Trevor Lee: Sydal talks his third eye crap to Swann, they tease a three way test of strength and Swann ends up dancing. Sydal attacks and lays in kicks to both. Swann hits a RANA on Lee as the pace picks up and Swan dropkicks Sydal. He follows with strikes and Sydal fires back with leg kicks, grounding Swann. Sydal now lays in chops, and then grounds things, working the knee of Swann as Lee finally returns and runs into a Sydal suplex. Lee fights back, dumps Sydal and starts working over Swann with strikes. Sydal returns and takes out Lee, but Swann hits a RANA. Swann follows with the tope, wiping out both on the floor. Sydal hides under the ring and attacks Swann, but back in and Lee takes control. Lee lays in strikes, but Sydal cuts him off with kicks and follows with gonorrhea for 2. Swann returns and hits a head scissors on Sydal and an enziguri to Lee. The RANA follows for 2. Lee dumps Swann and hits the superman punch on Sydal. Swann returns and cradles Lee for the win in a finish that confused everyone. Rich Swann defeated Matt Sydal and Trevor Lee @ 8:48 via pin [**¾] This was pretty good, but was too slavish to the triple threat formula and the finish was completely flat and confusing. The work also stayed in first gear and never teased getting out of it.
Maxted & Robbie X vs. McCluskey & Steel: Steel is what Baron Corbin would look like if he worked out. Steel and Robbie to begin and Steel immediately overpowers Robbie. Maxted tags in and locks up with Steel. They work to the ropes and Maxted lays in strikes and shoulder tackles. Maxted takes control, hits the backdrop and Robbie tags back in. McCluskey in and he and Robbie pick up the pace and Robbie hits a RANA. The dropkick follows and Maxted tags back in and hits the delayed suplex on McCluskey for 2. He and Robbie work double teams on McCluskey, and takes Steel to the floor. Robbie follows with a step up dive to the floor. Steel cuts off Robbie and slams him to the apron. Back in and McCluskey dropkicks Maxted. Steel rolls Robbie back in and McCluskey & Steel work double teams. Steel tosses Robbie around and McCluskey tags back in and hits the sliding dropkick for 2. Robbie fights back, but McCluskey cuts him off with a sliding German and flying leg lariat for 2. Steel tags back in and beats down Robbie. Robbie hits a desperation jawbreaker, and enziguri. Hot tag to Maxted and he runs wild on Steel and McCluskey. The missile dropkick follows for 2. McCluskey cuts him off and it breaks down. McCluskey up top and the moonsault eats boots. It breaks down again, Steel and Maxted brawl and steel looks for a powerbomb, countered and Maxted hits the blockbuster for 2. McCluskey cuts off the lethal injection with a superkick, and Robbie counters the powerbomb with a RANA and hits the lethal injection and running shooting star for the win on McCluskey. Maxted & Robbie X defeated McCluskey & Steel @ 11:15 via pin [***½] I had no expectations for this as I knew extremely little about them, but this was a very good tag team match that kept the crowd and allowed all four men to shine.
Su Yung vs. Lana Austin: Yung yells and convulses, scaring Austin to begin. Austin then scores a cradle for 2. She follows with uppercuts and hits Yung with her ass. Yung fires up with strikes, but Austin fights back and hits a high cross for 2. Yung to the floor and Austin follows, laying in strikes. Yung cuts her off, sending her to the barricades. The suplex follows, and back in, Yung has control and tosses her across the ring a few times. Austin is set in the tree of WHOA and Yung lays in kicks. She then hits a hanging neck breaker and Austin spills to the floor. Yung follows, gets a chair, and sets Austin in it. The apron cannonball follows. Back in they go and Yung fires away with kicks, but Austin shoves her away and fires up with clotheslines and a Russian leg sweep. They work into a double down. Back to the feet and they trade strikes, slaps by Yung but Austin cuts her off and hits the rolling elbow for 2. Yung now hits the head scissors to the buckles and covers for 2. Yung gets her creepy glove and the mandible claw is countered by an Austin head butt and DDT as Yung spills to the floor. Yung mists Austin and hits panic switch for the win. Su Yung defeated Lana Austin @ 10:40 via pin [***] This was good and one of Yung’s better matches in Impact. She had a great sense of urgency, Austin was a fun and game opponent who got a lot, and this was fun and enjoyable.
IMPACT Tag Team Championship Match: Champions LAX vs. Jody Fleisch & Jonny Storm: They shake hand and LAX attacks. They take early control until Jody RANAs LAX into each other and Jonny follows with a tornillo. Back in and Jonny & Jody double team Santana, covering for 2. Santana fights back, he and Jonny trade arm drags and Jonny hits a RANA. Jody tags in and Ortiz cuts him off and grounds the action. Jody to his feet, picks up the pace and hits a leaping enziguri and a REVERSE RANA on Ortiz! Ortiz manages to cut him off with a lariat and LAX now hit suicide dives. They brawl on the floor, and back in, LAX takes the heat on Jody. They work quick tags and double teams, and Santana hits a snap suplex for 2 and then grounds the action. Ortiz tags in and hits the leg lariat for 2. LAX continues running through double teams and Santana follows with a crab. Jody escapes and Santana follows with chops and takes Jody up top. Jody fights him off, and drops down and hits the Spanish fly on Santana. Ortiz cuts off the tag, and Jody hits d double code red and tags in Jonny. He flies in with a high cross, and then a RANA. The moonsault follows for 2. LAX finally cuts him off, but Jody & Jonnny fight back as Jody hits an insane moonsault to the floor. Back in and Jonny takes Santana up top and hits the arm drag and Jody hits the standing shooting star for 2. Jonny suplexes Jody into a moonsault onto Santana for 2, Santana fires up but Jody gets the tarantula and now they work into a four-way submission. Jonny follows with superkicks, Jody enziguris Santana and hits the running boot on Ortiz. Santana cuts off the 720 DDT but Jody counters back into a slam and flies in and Jonny & Jody hit British Airways for a GREAT near fall. LAX fire sup, they run wild with double teams and the street sweeper finishes Jody. Champions LAX defeated Jody Fleisch & Jonny Storm @ 15:40 via pin [****] This was great stuff, worked very similarly to how the Young Bucks worked with Jody Fleisch & Jonny Storm. LAX did their thing, were great, but also allowed the legends to shine and they had a great crowd. I fucking love that in the year of our lord, 2018, that Jody Fleisch & Jonny Storm are putting on bangers with today’s tag teams.
– Post match, Jody Fleisch & Jonny Storm strap the titles on LAX out of respect. LAX then kneels before then and offers a hand.
Eli Drake vs. Joe Hendry: After some promo time, they work into some back and forth until Hendry hits a knee strike and they spill to the floor for a brief brawl. Back in and Hendry gets a cradle for 2. Hendry misses a corner splash and Drake connects with the neck breaker and takes control, dumping Hendry to the floor. Drake follows, and lays into Hendry with elbows on the apron. Back in and Drake scores with a neck breaker for 2. Hendry fires back with uppercuts, but Drake hits another neck breaker for 2. Drake follows with elbow drops, and that gets 2. Drake follows with a clothesline, but Hendry fires up with elbows, strikes, and he hits a neck breaker. The DDT follows for 2. Hendry gets the ankle lock, but Drake rolls him in to the corner. Drake looks to fire up but runs into a fall away slam. Drake fights back, looks for the gravy train, but Hendry cradles him for the win. Joe Hendry defeated Eli Drake @ 8:05 via pin [**½] This was a perfectly solid match, but these guys need to stop having matches. Their matches aren’t bad, but they do not bring out the best in each other at all.
Eddie Edwards & Justin Sysum vs. Moose & Nathan Cruz: Moose has new heel music. Cruz and Eddie start off since Moose powders like a good heel that’s afraid of the man he turned on. Cruz looks to take early control but Eddie cuts him off and tags in Sysum. The high cross follows for 2. Cru cuts him off, and tags in Moose. Sysum catches a high cross but Sysum counters and hits a head scissors. Eddie back in but Moose immediately tags back out. Cruz cuts off Eddie with a high knee and now Moose tags in. He chokes out Eddie in the corner. The dropkick follows, and Moose knocks Sysum to the floor. Cruz tags back in and Eddie fires back but Cruz grounds the action. Eddie bites Cru to escape and tags in Sysum. He trades strikes with Moose, and hits the XPLODER. Cruz is dumped but Moose cuts off Sysum and tags Cruz back in. The suplex follows, and Cruz follows with strikes. Moose tags back in, delivers chops and dropkicks Sysum to the floor. Moose rolls him back in, he flips off the crowd and Sysum wipes him out with a tope. Moose cuts off the tag, pulling Eddie to the floor, and back in and Moose controls. Cruz lays the boots to Sysum now, and covers for 2. Moose is back in and Sysum fights off a suplex and hits one of his own. Sysum finally tags in Eddie and he runs wild on Cruz. The suicide dive to Moose follows. Eddie is fired the fuck up. Back in and Eddie hits the running chops for 2. Eddie gets cut off and Cruz dropkicks Sysum to the floor. Sysum spears Cruz and Eddie hits the tiger driver for 2 as Moose pulls out the ref. Moose back in and hits go to hell on Eddie and Cruz hits the diving head butt for 2. Moose slaps Eddie around and Eddie likes it and rips open his own shirt and dares Moose to chop him and they trade. Superkicks by Eddie and Moose head butts him, but Eddie hits the blue thunder bomb for the double down. Wholesale changes to Cruz & Sysum, Sysum runs wild and heads up top, but Moose cuts him off. Eddie wipes out Moos with the Boston knee party and gets the kendo stick. Moose bails and sacrifices Cruz and Eddie hits him with the kendo and the Sysum 450 finishes it. Eddie Edwards & Justin Sysum defeated Moose & Nathan Cruz @ 18:00 via pin [***¾] This had a really slow first half, but the back half was exceptionally strong. They didn’t overexpose the Moose & Eddie interactions, but gave us a great taste of what’s to come.
Barbed Wire Baseball Bat Death Match: Sami Callihan vs. Jimmy Havoc: They talk shit and work into a fast paced back and forth. Sami knocks Havoc to he floor but Havoc cuts him off and gets a staple gun. He staples Sami in the chest and then the ass. Sami cuts him off and tosses the gun away. Sami then misses a chop and hits the post. Havoc eye pokes him and then throws a chair at him. Havoc sets him in a chair, takes a lap and pokes Sami in the eyes. Chair shots follow, and he then whips Sami to the barricade and throws another chair at him. Sami cuts him off with strikes, and rolls him back to the apron. They trade strikes and Sami rakes the eyes and hits the cactus driver onto the apron. Sami spits at the ref and tosses Havoc back in. They fight over the staple gun, and Sami staple Havoc to counter a sunset flip. Sami gets a magazine, rips out a page and staples it to Havoc. He then staples another to him, and then one to his head. Sami rips them off and low blows Havoc. Sami pulls out the spike and starts laying in shots on Havoc; Havoc is busted open. Sami gets the bat from the stage and brings it into the ring. Havoc shoots him the middle finger and then does the paper cut spots on Sami. Sami spits at him so Havoc paper cut his tongue. Havoc now gets a lemon and squeezes it into the paper cuts. Sami cuts off the acid rainmaker and grabs the bat, ripping into Havoc’s arm with it. Sami now uses the lemon but that fires up Havoc. Havoc “staples” his wounds shut and gets up some chairs. He takes Sami up top and they battle and Havoc hits a DVD into the chairs and the PK follows for 2. Havoc hits another DVD onto the chairs for 2. Havoc dumps out some thumbtacks and unwraps the barbed wire from the bat. He wraps it around his arm, but Sami cuts him off and sends him into the tacks.. Havoc low blows Sami with the barbed wire, but Sami hits a drop toehold on Havoc into the tacks. Sami now rips off Havoc’s shoes and socks. Havoc keeps fighting, hits the acid rainmaker with the bared wire for 2. Havoc up top for a double stomp but Sami moves and Havoc lands in the tacks! Cactus driver into the tacks and Sami wins. Sami Callihan defeated Jimmy Havoc @ 17:51 via pin [****] Your mileage may vary on this, depending on how much you enjoy the death match style stuff. But they worked to the stipulation very well, the crowd was into it and they did some insane shit. This was on the level of Havoc vs. Martinez from ROH in the UK, but also worked very differently to Havoc’s credit.
– End scene.
– Thanks for reading.
“Byyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyye Felicia!”
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