Memphis Wrestling (8.20.1983) Review

-Memphis Wrestling

-Originally aired August 20, 1983.

-Your hosts are Lance Russell & Dave Brown.

STAGGER LEE, BOBBY EATON, & TERRY TAYLOR vs. GIANT REBEL, PAT HUTCHINSON, & JESSE OWENS (with Jimmy Hart & Jim Cornette)
-Hutchinson & Owens, as Jimmy Hart tells it, have been coming to him the past few weeks begging for membership in the First Family because they thing that’s what they need for their careers to take off. Vice President Cornette approved the deal, and has even arranged for them to team up with Giant Rebel to give them a little added boost for their first match in the group.

-Taylor takes down Owens and Jimmy is already complaining about pulling tights. Everybody tees off on Owens, and Jimmy is doing some really funny commentary complaining about the face side’s tactics.

JIMMY: If Bobby Eaton is the legal man, why did Stagger Lee drop an elbow?
DAVE: He was on his way out.
JIMMY: Oh, I see, he was on his way out and he happened to drop an elbow. Thank you.

-Owens retreats and tags in Giant Rebel, and Hart immediately changes his tune on Owens, scolding him for being too weak to stay in the ring.

-Rebel drops a big leg on Taylor and tags in Hutchinson, who misses his own legdrop. Faces take turns unloading on Hutchinson, and Giant Rebel goes over to the commentary table and tells the Jimmys that he doesn’t think these boys have what it takes. Rebel, Cornette, and Hart all agree and leave, and an elbow off the ropes by Stagger Lee finishes this one.

-Off to the Mid-South Coliseum for the International Heavyweight Title match, Jerry Lawler defending against Ken Patera, who’s gambling his medals. Referee Jerry Calhoun gets bumped. Jimmy Hart tries to interfere, but just winds up getting the crap beaten out of him until Ken Patera fetches a chair and knocks the King cold, and Ken Patera is once again the International Champion.

-Later in the night, the King and Austin Idol teamed up to defend the World Tag Team Titles against the Assassins. Pier sixer, and Idol looks like he’s going to finish this one with a figure four leglock, but the referee is trying to split up a Lawler/#2 brawl and get them back to their corners, and Patera, not satisfied with getting his belt back, shows up and drops an elbow off the top rope, knocking out Idol, and #1 scores the pin to capture the World Tag Team Title.

-Randy Hales is in the locker room with Austin Idol. Austin very specifically makes it a point to say, slowly and carefully, “the CWA World Tag Team Championship.” History is written by the winners, but you can 100% see cracks forming in the territory system before Vince ever made one single chess move. Austin wants a six-man tag for revenge. He just got off the phone with Jimmy Valiant, and Jimmy’s coming into town on Monday night to team up with Idol and the King to face Ken Patera and the Assassins.

-“Mercy! Mercy! Mercy!” Jimmy Valiant is here via videotape from the Mid-Atlantic house show promo wall. Three dogs in Memphis keep chasing cars, and he’s bringing some dog biscuits, and then he’s going to kick their brains out and kiss everybody. I hope Jimmy never actually owned a dog.

-In the heel locker room, Jimmy Hart is celebrating with Ken Patera and the Assassins, and this segment answers every question you’ve ever had about why the Assassins wore shirts when they wrestled. And again, Jimmy is making it about to say “CWA” here.

-We’re off to another helpful hint from Andy Kaufman. The station manager has told him that a lot of letters have come in from viewers about these segments, so Andy asks us to please stop because our letters are illegible and he doesn’t like touching them anyway. And with that, we got to a lesson about MOUTHWASH, “not moawthwarsh.”

-Dave Brown welcomes Tommy Rogers, U.S. Junior Heavyweight Champion. Did Jerry Jarrett get a BOGO coupon for title belts in last Sunday’s newspaper? He offers some words of warning for Andy Kaufman if he keeps making trouble.

TOMMY ROGERS (U.S. Junior Heavyweight Champion) vs. PAT HUTCHINSON (with Jimmy Hart and Jim Cornette)
-Dave Brown is quite confused here because Jimmy and Jim walked out on Hutchinson and basically fired him after the last match, but Jim explains that they talked things over and they just decided that maybe they were a little rash and they like Pat should get a second chance.

-Bell rings, the guy who recorded this loses interest, we jump ahead to Pat Hutchinson passing out in a sleeperhold. Jimmy and Jim seem to have a difference of opinion about if Pat is unqualified or if he got screwed over by a chokehold that the careless referee missed.

-Stan Hansen offers some videotaped words. He’s a real cowboy, not like guys in Florida who PRETEND to be cowboys!

-Jimmy and Jim are back with all the trophies, plaques, and title belts that their men hold, and the Assassins say that they’re bringing a flea collar on Monday night for when they shove Jimmy Valiant’s dog biscuits in his butt. This is getting more confusing by the moment.

5.9

The final score: review Not So Good

The 411

The way the promotion is suddenly flooding everyone with title belts seems a bit weird, but at least Andy Kaufman was fun.