wrestling / Video Reviews
Mid-South Wrestling (5.7.1983) Review
Image Credit: WWE
Loading...-Originally aired May 7, 1983.
-Your hosts are Boyd & Bill. Boyd is five years ahead of the game on Vince McMahon with his powder blue three-piece suit.
-We open with news from Houston. Chavo Guerrero’s scheduled opponent at a house show didn’t show up, so Mr. Olympia and Ted DiBiase issued a challenge, and Chavo ended up wrestling Ted DiBiase instead. It later came out that Chavo’s opponent was never REALLY booked, and that apparently somebody with a Mexican accent called Paul Boesch, lied about his identity and got his match signed. Before we can dwell on how stunningly inept this angle makes Paul Boesch sound, Bill abruptly changes the subject to this whole business about Hacksaw Jim Duggan, who suddenly has a first name now that he’s a babyface.
-We hear Duggan’s fantastic promo from last week, where he emphasizes that he doesn’t really want to fight DiBiase and so long as DiBiase doesn’t interfere in his matches, there won’t be any fight between them. That takes us to Duggan beating Akbar and stealing his pants like some kind of helpful beaver. Akbar standing there injured and almost naked while DiBiase is all like, “Well, he didn’t attack ME, so…” is really funny. So Akbar, frustrated, decides to send the Black Ninja after him instead, and they’re actually going to do this on TV!
HACKSAW JIM DUGGAN vs. BLACK NINJA (with Skandar Akbar)
-Duggan, still with a heel spirit in him, attacks before the bell and he’s all over Ninja, and we don’t even get a thirty-second match, as Ted DiBiase hits the ring and knocks Duggan out with the loaded glove.
-Watts recaps the deal that Duggan and DiBiase made and, yeah, the deal’s off. DiBiase interfered.
-We go to the Superdome for highlights of a bout between Chavo Guerrero and Bill Irwin. Bill Watts still won’t say what actually happened to Chavo in Houston, but pledges that he’ll try to have some footage for us in time for next week’s episode. Watts keeps harping about how Irwin has broken through as a huge star in Mid-South but they’re still just using him as a jobber.
-We go back to the commentary table, where Boyd Pierce says that King Kong Bundy’s claim that he “invented” the Atlantic City Avalanche is hokum because everybody knows Bill Watts used to do that move, except he called it the Oklahoma Stampede. That’s a powerslam! It’s completely different!
-We go to pre-taped words from King Kong Bundy, who complains that the jobbers are beneath him and FINALLY, this week, he gets an actual opponent. And Mr. Wrestling II’s kneelift won’t be so effective on a man with a 26-inch neck. TIL: King Kong Bundy had a neck.
MR. WRESTLING II vs. KING KONG BUNDY
-Watts formally declares Mid-South Wrestling to be better than wrestling from Atlanta or San Antonio because you’re getting this match on free TV. Bundy gets II in the corner and hammers him. He chokes him over the ropes. II tries to neutralize him with a standing front facelock, but Bundy lunges forward in it and rams II into the corner. Bundy stomps away, but II hangs in there, and it turns into a fist fight. II gets the upper hand, then throws a knee at Bundy. Bundy’s staggered but in his feet. A second one, Bundy’s still alive, third one knocks Bundy down. Bundy gets back up and II goes for a fourth knee, but Bundy takes his leg out.
-Bundy goes for the splash right there, but II gets out of the way. Another knee by II topples Bundy into the referee. Bundy takes control in the confusion but misses the avalanche. Referee is still out and Olympia hits the ring with something sinister visible on the bottom of his boots. Dropkick knocks II out cold, and the powerslam…okay, hold on, they’re calling the POWERSLAM an avalanche. Okay, that’s weird. Powerlanche gets the five count. Wild TV booking, just the way I like it.
TED DIBIASE (with Skandar Akbar) vs. TIM HORNER
-“Duggan” chants seem pretty evident that the face turn is working. DiBiase dominates for a bit before Horner surprises DiBiase with a series of armdrags and sends him to the floor. DiBiase fights back with punches and elbows. Horner reverses an Irish whip but meets a knee on the corner charge. DiBiase drops a forearm while Bill Watts just mentions “Oh by the way, Von Erichs vs. Freebirds on next week’s episode.”
-Biel throw and a dropkick by Horner, who’s hanging in there…until he doesn’t. Horner crashes into the corner and DiBiase gives him an elbow to the back of the head. Powerslam looks to end it, but DiBiase’s embarassed by how good a fight Horner put up, so DiBiase picks him up at two and sends him into the corner. DiBiase just beats and beats on him, refusing to finish the match, but Hacksaw Jim Duggan hits the ring with a 2×4 and breaks it across DiBiase’s back. Well, NOW it’s a war.
-Duggan declares that he’s a proud American, and he’s going to walk tall.
HACKSAW BUTCH REED & TIGER CONWAY JR. vs. RON CHEATHAM & DON CLARK
-Oh yeah. Come to think of it, I guess we can put a bullet in that Hacksaw/Hacksaw feud.
-Reed heaves Cheatham across the ring as Watts muses on Hacksaw’s pledge to walk tall and says it reminds him of the time he had to walk tall against Ole Anderson on WTBS. You know, that station with the inferior Atlanta wrestling. Because Watts used to wrestle there.
-Reed and Conway take turns working the leg of Cheatham. Clark tags in and takes his licks. Watts hypes future matches on Mid-South, including, in pretty much the same breath, “The Von Erichs vs. the Freebirds, and Ken Woodby vs. Tony Zane.”
-All four men end up in the ring. Jobbers attempt a double irish whip, but the faces do-see-do and reverse it. Flying tackle by Reed ends it.
TONY ZANE vs. KEN WOODBY
-Oh thank god, they’re delivering on it THIS week. Watts ignores the match and instead takes the time to thank fans in the Shreveport television market, because Mid-South Wrestling got a 48 share in the last ratings book. That’s not even peak for Mid-South, as they apparently did 70 shares in some markets, and Watts admitted later to not being TV-savvy enough to realize what an insane number that was, so he didn’t cash in on it like he could have. Shreveport is so happy with Mid-South, Watts reveals, that the station has just signed a contract to air the show for the next two years, by which point the entire landscape of the business will be different. It’s crazy how it just snuck up on everybody. We’re less than eight months away from Vince declaring war and it’s business as usual.
-Zane works the neck as Pierce takes a moment to ask the fans not to throw garbage in the ring, and Watts says as a wrestler, he knows he wants the satisfaction of beating the guy himself, as opposed to a tainted win because some fan blinded the opponent. So no garbage throwing, dammit. Zane gets the three-count meanwhile.
