The Contentious Ten 08.03.09: The SummerSlams (Part 1 – #20 to #12)

Unfortunately, this week’s column ran too long to fit in the allotted space. As a result, I had to cut The Top Ten Comments from this week’s article. I’ll probably have to do the same thing next week. That said, I clearly made a mistake leaving Rick Rude off of last week’s list.

For the purpose of the article I have devised a formula for grading each pay per view, as opposed to ranking them entirely on how I “feel” about them. I could try to explain the methodology for the whole thing, but it would be very long, and very, very, boring. I show all of my work throughout the article so hopefully it will make sense. Briefly, the process involves scoring each match and weighting each match based on the match’s importance to the show. Then everything is totaled up and averaged. Every event is ranked by match score and average weight and is graded on a curve for both categories. The final average counts for 70% of the show’s final grade, the remaining 30% are bonus points that start at a base score of 50.

While I’ve seen and own every SummerSlam, I’m not all that into starring/scoring matches. I know what I like, and I can be fairly objective. However, I compared my notes with the ratings of several Internet match scorers. So, the match scores I have listed are an average consensus of myself and my other sources. This is still subjective, but it’s still less subjective than me just listing them in the order I feel they should be. The match weights, however, are entirely mine.

The Bottom Ten SummerSlams

Notice that these are “The Bottom Ten” some of these events are quite good, just not good enough to make it to the top ten.

XXI

SummerSlam 1989

Feel The Heat
August 28, 1989
Meadowlands Arena
East Rutherford, New Jersey
Attendance: 20,000 (approx.)

WWF Tag Team Champions The Brain Busters (Arn Anderson and Tully Blanchard) w/Bobby Heenan defeated The Hart Foundation (Bret Hart and Jim Neidhart) in a Non-Title match.
Match Rating: 85, Match Weight: 1.5, Final Score: 127.5

Dusty Rhodes defeated The Honkey Tonk Man w/Jimmy Hart.
Match Rating: 20, Match Weight: 1, Final Score: 20

Mr. Perfect defeated The Red Rooster.
Match Rating: 20, Match Weight: 1, Final Score: 20

Rick Martel and The Fabulous Rougeaus (Jacques and Raymond) w/Jimmy Hart and Slick defeated Tito Santana and The Rockers (Shawn Michaels and Marty Jannetty).
Match Rating: 60, Match Weight: 1, Final Score: 60

The Ultimate Warrior defeated WWF Intercontinental Champion Rick Rude w/Bobby Heenan to win the title.
Match Rating: 65, Match Weight: 2, Final Score: 130

Jim Duggan and Demolition (Ax and Smash) defeated Andre the Giant and the Twin Towers (Big Bossman and Akeem) w/Bobby Heenan and Slick.
Match Rating: 10, Match Weight: .5, Final Score: 5

Hercules defeated Greg Valentine w/Jimmy Hart by reverse decision when special guest ring announcer Ronnie Garvin announced Hercules the winner.
Match Rating: 10, Match Weight: 1, Final Score: 10

Ted DiBiase w/Virgil defeated Jimmy Snuka by countout.
Match Rating: 15, Match Weight: 1.5, Final Score: 22.5

WWF Champion Hulk Hogan and Brutus Beefcake w/Elizabeth defeated Zeus and Randy Savage w/Sensational Sherri.
Match Rating: 40, Match Weight: 2.5, Final Score: 100

Total Possible Points: 1200; With an Average of: 133.33
Final Ranking of Weight and Curved Score: 21; 4.762
Match Quality Total: 495
Match Quality Percentage: ((495/1200)*100) = 41.25
Final Ranking of Match Quality and Curved Score: 19; 14.286
Subtotal: ((4.762+14.286)/2) = 9.524
Bonuses and Deductions: -10 For Irrelevant Wrestler, Zeus
(0.7*9.524) + (0.3*40) = Final Score: 18.67

The second SummerSlam wasn’t a very good event. The one major highlight of the night was the Intercontinental Title Match between Rick Rude and The Ultimate Warrior. This was the rematch from their WrestleMania V contest and stands out as one of the better matches of Warrior’s career. The banter between Jesse Ventura and Tony Schiavone during this match was great. At one point Warrior hit Rude with the belt and Ventura called for the disqualification, to which Tony replied that it shouldn’t be a disqualification because they were outside the ring. Ventura answers back “What, you’re going to tell me you can shoot somebody as long as its outside the ring?” The finish saw Roddy Piper make his way down to ringside and distract Rude, who was in control, by mooning him. This gave the Warrior time to recover, hit the flying shoulderblock, the gorilla press and the big splash for the win and his second Intercontinental Title.

The main event was pretty abysmal. The story was that a deranged Tiny Lister thought that he was Zeus, his character for his and Hulk Hogan’s movie No Holds Barred. He came to the WWF to fight Hogan because he was jealous that Hogan received a higher billing than him. Hogan was of course still feuding with former ally Randy Savage. A rematch between the two would have made for a better match, but they wanted to hype No Holds Barred so we got Hogan and Beefcake vs. Savage and Zeus instead. Savage worked really hard, but Zeus was just awful. All he really did was no-sell everything Hogan and Beefcake threw at him. The end saw Hogan hit Zeus in the face with Sherri’s loaded purse and hit the legdrop.

The rest of the card was pretty weak. The non-title tag team match between the Brain Busters and the Hart Foundation was great, but everything else was average to poor. The strangest thing about this show was that it didn’t really seem like any major feuds were being addressed. The feud between former Strike Force members Martel and Santana got relegated to a six-man tag. Also, the Greg Valentine and Ronnie Garvin feud was not capitalized on. The rest of the card just feels like short filler matches. Maybe a modern perspective clouds my objectivity, but this show feels more like a bad three-hour episode of Raw than a pay per view.

XX

SummerSlam 1988

Where the Mega-Powers Meet the Mega-Bucks
August 29, 1988
Madison Square Garden
New York, New York
Attendance: 20,000 (approx.)

The British Bulldogs (Davey Boy Smith and The Dynamite Kid) and The Fabulous Rougeaus (Jacques and Raymond) fought to a time-limit draw.
Match Rating: 60, Match Weight: 1, Final Score: 60

Bad News Brown defeated Ken Patera.
Match Rating: 10, Match Weight: 1, Final Score: 10

Rick Rude defeated Junkyard Dog by disqualification.
Match Rating: 10, Match Weight: 1.5, Final Score: 15

The Powers of Pain (The Warlord and The Barbarian) w/Baron von Raschke defeated The Bolsheviks (Nikoli Volkoff and Boris Zhukov) w/Slick.
Match Rating: 10, Match Weight: .5, Final Score: 5

The Ultimate Warrior defeated WWF Intercontinental Champion The Honky Tonk Man w/Jimmy Hart.
Match Rating: 20, Match Weight: 1.5, Final Score: 30
(Even though this match doesn’t warrant any points, it was booked perfectly, so I’m giving it a few)

Dino Bravo w/Frenchy Martin defeated Don Muraco.
Match Rating: 20, Match Weight: 1.5, Final Score: 30

WWF Tag Team Champions Demolition (Ax and Smash) w/Mr. Fuji and Jimmy Hart defeated The Hart Foundation (Bret Hart and Jim Neidhart).
Match Rating: 50, Match Weight: 2, Final Score: 100

Big Boss Man w/Slick defeated Koko B. Ware.
Match Rating: 40, Match Weight: .5, Final Score: 20

Jake Roberts defeated Hercules.
Match Rating: 20, Match Weight: 1.5, Final Score: 30

WWF Champion Randy Savage & Hulk Hogan w/Elizabeth defeated Ted DiBiase & Andre The Giant w/Virgil and Bobby Heenan.
Match Rating: 55, Match Weight: 2.5, Final Score: 137.5

Total Possible Points: 1350; With an Average of: 135
Final Ranking of Weight and Curved Score: 19; 14.286
Match Quality Total: 437.5
Match Quality Percentage: ((437.5/1350)*100) = 32.41
Final Ranking of Match Quality and Curved Score: 21; 4.762
Subtotal: ((14.286+4.762)/2) = 9.524
Bonuses and Deductions: +10 For a “First Event” Bonus; +5 For a Special Bonus for the Record Short Match; +5 For the Guest Referee Match
(0.7*9.524) + (0.3*70) = Final Score: 27.67

The first SummerSlam was a fairly weak offering from the WWF. I’m sure at the time it was a huge deal as this would become only the third annual pay per view, but hindsight hasn’t been too kind to this event. This event is really only remembered for two matches: The first is the incredibly quick and decisive victory of the Ultimate Warrior over the Honky Tonk Man. Honky was scheduled to wrestle Brutus Beefcake for the Intercontinental Title, but Beefcake had been injured by Ron Bass before the event. Honky’s braggadocio led him to issue an open challenge to the rest of the locker room. The Ultimate Warrior answered the challenge and to the sheer delight of the fans destroyed The Honky Tonk Man within thirty seconds.

The other match was the main event, which saw Hulk Hogan and WWF Champion Randy Savage cap off their respective feuds with Andre the Giant and Ted DiBiase. Jesse Ventura was chosen by WWF President Jack Tunney to be the special referee for the match, adding a bit of intrigue as to whether he would be biased or not. As it turned out, he was. The match itself was decent, but not spectacular, and is remembered most for it’s ending when Miss Elizabeth, Savage’s manager ripped off her skirt, revealing her cheerleader like bloomers, to distract Ventura and the Mega Bucks. The diversion allowed the Mega Powers to isolate DiBiase leading to a Savage flying elbow and a Hogan legdrop. Ventura paused while counting to three, which caused Savage to force his hand to the mat.

Just like 1989, SummerSlam 88 was filled with a number of non-feud related matches, the only major exception being the Hart Foundation vs. Demolition. The rest of the matches really had no storyline significance. For example, Rick Rude wrestled Junkyard Dog despite his feud with Jake Roberts. Roberts interfered in the match but it would have made more sense to have Rude wrestle Roberts. They also could have blown-off the Don Muraco, Greg Valentine feud as well, but the WWF gave us Dino Bravo vs. Don Muraco instead. Once again, watching this show now is a lot like watching an extended episode of Raw; a few title matches, a few squashes, and a big tag team main event.

XIX

SummerSlam 1995

Face the Heat
August 27, 1995
Pittsburg Civic Arena
Pittsburg, Pennsylvania
Attendance: 18,062

Hakushi defeated The 1-2-3 Kid.
Match Rating: 50, Match Weight: .5, Final Score: 25

Hunter Hearst Helmsley defeated “Spark Plug” Bob Holly.
Match Rating: 10, Match Weight: 1, Final Score: 10

The Smokin’ Gunns defeated Eli & Jacob Blu w/Uncle Zebekiah.
Match Rating: 15, Match Weight: .5, Final Score: 7.5

Barry Horowitz defeated Skip w/Sunny.
Match Rating: 50, Match Weight: 1, Final Score: 50

Bertha Faye w/Harvey Wippleman defeated WWF Women’s Champion Alundra Blayze.
Match Rating: 30, Match Weight: 1, Final Score: 30

The Undertaker defeated Kama w/Ted DiBiase in a Casket Match.
Match Rating: 40, Match Weight: 1.5, Final Score: 60

Bret Hart defeated Isaac Yankem w/Jerry Lawler via disqualification.
Match Rating: 55, Match Weight: 1.5, Final Score: 82.5

WWF Intercontinental Champion Shawn Michaels defeated Razor Ramon in a Ladder Match.
Match Rating: 100, Match Weight: 2.5, Final Score: 250

WWF Champion Diesel defeated King Mabel w/Sir Mo.
Match Rating: 0, Match Weight: 2.5, Final Score: 0

Total Possible Points: 1200; With an Average of: 133.33
Final Ranking of Weight and Curved Score: 20; 9.524
Match Quality Total: 515
Match Quality Percentage: ((515/1200)*100) = 42.92
Final Ranking of Match Quality and Curved Score: 15; 33.334
Subtotal: ((9.524+33.334)/2) = 21.429
Bonuses and Deductions: +10 For the Ladder Match; +5 For the Casket Match
(0.7*21.429) + (0.3*65) = Final Score: 34.5

I honestly thought that SummerSlam 95 was going to be at the bottom of the list, but then I remembered the Shawn Michaels, Razor Ramon Ladder Match. Their match was the one shining spot on an otherwise dreadful show. The funny thing was that this match almost didn’t happen. The Intercontinental Champion Shawn Michaels was scheduled to finish off his longstanding feud with his former bodyguard “Psycho” Sid, but the WWF President Gorilla Monsoon changed the match to Michaels vs. Ramon in a Ladder Match for the Intercontinental Title. It’s speculated that the WWF knew they had another stinker of a show on their hands, so they opted to go with a rematch of one of the most celebrated matches in history instead of the Sid, Michaels blow-off. The match was, of course, a classic, and was in many ways superior to their original encounter, because they played off of several spots from their first match, with each wrestler learning from their past mistakes. The end of the match saw, for the first time ever in the WWF, two ladders come into play, and (after some technical difficulties) Michaels retain the Intercontinental Title.

Check out the whole Ladder Match Here!

Although there was a pretty decent In Your House event in between them, SummerSlam 95 was the major follow up to the infamously bad 1995 King of the Ring show that saw Mable, from the tag team Men on a Mission, capture the crown. By the nature of his victory King Mable was elevated to a feud with the WWF Champion Diesel. The match was predictably awful, its only saving grace being that it was fairly short. Interestingly enough Lex Luger made his final appearance as a WWF Superstar during this match when he kept Mabel’s partner, Mo from interfering. The match ended after Mable missed a splash from the second rope, and Diesel connected with a flying forearm.

The WWF’s future was looking pretty bleak in the summer of 1995, and this card illustrates that almost as well as the aforementioned King of the Ring event. The rest of the matches feature an array of some of the WWF’s worst gimmicks ever. There’s the race car driver Bob Holly, Kane as the evil wrestling Dentist of Jerry Lawler, exercise gurus Skip and Sunny, Triple H as the 19th Century snob, the lovable jobber Barry Horowitz, and the backwoods mountain men the Blu Twins. The matches themselves weren’t terrible, but they were, by in large, mostly irrelevant even at the time they were taking place. This accounts for all of the low match weights. The fact that Bret Hart had to wrestle the evil dentist Isaac Yankem, I think is the best indicator of how bad this show was.

XVIII

SummerSlam 2007

The Party is Over
August 26, 2007
Continental Airlines Arena
East Rutherford, New Jersey
Attendance: 17,441

Kane defeated Finlay.
Match Rating: 40, Match Weight: 1, Final Score: 40

WWE Intercontinental Champion Umaga defeated Carlito and Mr. Kennedy in a Triple Threat Match.
Match Rating: 40, Match Weight: 1, Final Score: 40

Rey Mysterio defeated Chavo Guerrero.
Match Rating: 50, Match Weight: 1.5, Final Score: 75

Beth Phoenix won an Interpromotional Divas Battle Royal featuring Michelle McCool, Torrie Wilson, Melina, Mickie James, Jillian Hall, Kelly Kelly, Kristal Marshal, Victoria, Layla, Maria, and Brooke Adams.
Match Rating: 10, Match Weight: .5, Final Score: 5

ECW Champion John Morrison defeated CM Punk.
Match Rating: 65, Match Weight: 1.5, Final Score: 97.5

Triple H defeated King Booker w/Queen Sharmell.
Match Rating: 40, Match Weight: 2, Final Score: 80

Batista defeated World Heavyweight Champion The Great Khali w/Ranjin Singh via disqualification.
Match Rating: 0, Match Weight: 2, Final Score: 0

WWE Champion John Cena defeated Randy Orton.
Match Rating: 60, Match Weight: 2.5, Final Score: 150

Total Possible Points: 1200; With an Average of: 150
Final Ranking of Weight and Curved Score: 13; 42.858
Match Quality Total: 487.5
Match Quality Percentage: ((487.5/1200)*100) = 40.63
Final Ranking of Match Quality and Curved Score: 20; 9.524
Subtotal: ((42.858+9.524)/2) = 26.191
Bonuses and Deductions: +5 For the Post Brand Extension Double Main Event
(0.7*26.191) + (0.3*55) = Final Score: 34.83

The word “disappointment” comes to my mind when I think of SummerSlam 2007. For some reason I remember really looking forward to this show, in fact I went out and bought an InFocus projector so I could put it up on a giant screen, so I’m willing to cop to a little bias on this one. The event’s focus was spread over four matches: Rey Mysterio’s return to the ring to battle the man that took him out of action, Chavo Guerrero; Triple H’s return to the ring to battle King Booker; the World Heavyweight Title match between the Great Khali and Batista; finally, the WWE Title match between John Cena and Randy Orton.

Rey Mysterio had a decent match with Chavo Guerrero, but it wasn’t as good as a number of their previous matches, including the “I Quit” match that resulted in Mysterio going out on injury for nearly a year. The match also suffered from being anti-climatic due to the fact that there was no way Mysterio was going to lose his return match. Triple H’s return match suffered from the same foregone conclusion, except the ending may have even been more obvious, wasn’t as good a match, and it squashed a viable main event talent in King Booker. SmackDown’s main event match between the World Heavyweight Champion The Great Khali, who had just won the vacant belt in a battle royal, and Batista, was short and absolutely terrible. To top it off the match ended in a disqualification leading to more disappointment.

The final match of the night pitted WWE Champion John Cena against Randy Orton. At this point Cena had been champion for nearly a year and it seemed likely that he was finally going to drop the title to Orton. Orton consistently had gotten the better of Cena in the weeks leading up to SummerSlam, but there wasn’t much other build to the match. The match itself was pretty good, but was far from memorable and ended rather abruptly when Cena kicked out of the RKO and moments later lifted Orton and hit the F-U for the victory. The rest of the matches on the show (with the exception of the Divas battle royal, which was pretty bad) were simply average.

The truth is, nothing on the show outside of Batista vs. Khali was really offensive, but nothing was really good, and a lot of it was simply too predicable or disappointing. Maybe on a regular show, or even another pay per view, average would have been acceptable, but average on the second biggest show of the year just doesn’t cut it.

XVII

SummerSlam 2003

August 24, 2003
America West Arena
Phoenix, Arizona
Attendance: 16,113

World Tag Team Champions La Resistance (Rene Dupree and Sylvan Grenier) defeated The Dudley Boyz (Bubba Ray and D-Von).
Match Rating: 10, Match Weight: 1, Final Score: 10

Undertaker defeated A-Train w/Sable.
Match Rating: 20, Match Weight: 1, Final Score: 20

Shane McMahon defeated Eric Bischoff in a Falls Count Anywhere Match.
Match Rating: 20, Match Weight: 1, Final Score: 20

WWE United States Champion Eddie Guerrero defeated Chris Benoit, Rhyno and Tajiri in a Four-Way Match.
Match Rating: 60, Match Weight: 1.5, Final Score: 90

WWE Champion Kurt Angle defeated Brock Lesnar.
Match Rating: 70, Match Weight: 2, Final Score: 140

Kane defeated Rob Van Dam in a No Disqualifications Match.
Match Rating: 40, Match Weight: 1.5, Final Score: 60

World Heavyweight Champion Triple H defeated Kevin Nash, Randy Orton, Shawn Michaels, Chris Jericho and Goldberg in an Elimination Chamber Match.
Match Rating: 60, Match Weight: 2.5, Final Score: 150

Total Possible Points: 1050; With an Average of: 150
Final Ranking of Weight and Curved Score: 15; 33.334
Match Quality Total: 490
Match Quality Percentage: ((490/1050)*100) = 46.67
Final Ranking of Match Quality and Curved Score: 13; 42.858
Subtotal: ((33.334+42.858)/2) = 38.096
Bonuses and Deductions: -10 For Irrelevant Wrestlers: Shane McMahon and Eric Bischoff; +5 For the Falls Count Anywhere Match; +5 For the No DQ Match; +5 For the Post Brand Extension Double Main Event; +10 For the Elimination Chamber Match
(0.7*38.096) + (0.3*65) = Final Score: 46.17

The 2003 edition of SummerSlam benefits from three slightly-above average matches: the four-way for the then newly revived United States Title, the WWE Title Match between Kurt Angle and Brock Lesnar, and the Elimination Chamber Match for the World Heavyweight Title.

The first of the two main events was Angle vs. Lesnar, a rematch from WrestleMania XIX. Angle’s health was called into question during the build up to their WrestleMania encounter due to his chronic neck injury. Immediately after the event Angle left to have neck surgery but was able to comeback a few months later. During that time Lesnar and Angle developed a friendship based on mutual respect, but things quickly changed after Angle won back the WWE Title from Lesnar in a triple threat match (also involving The Big Show) at July’s Vengeance pay per view. After Angle’s victory Lesnar proposed a rematch, but Vince McMahon said Lesnar had to earn his shot by beating him in a steel cage match, with Angle acting as the referee. Lesnar and Angle agreed to the stipulation, but the match was a ruse perpetrated by McMahon and Lesnar, and the pair beat the hell out of Angle. The match at SummerSlam was good, but not as good as their classic WrestleMania match. This match seemed more reckless and had a larger sports-entertainment vibe to it thanks to Vince McMahon’s interference. In the end, however, Angle was temporally placated as Lesnar tapped out cleanly to Angle’s anklelock.

The other main event was the Elimination Chamber Match for the World Heavyweight Title featuring the champion Triple H defending his belt against Chris Jericho, Shawn Michaels, Kevin Nash, Goldberg, and his Evolution partner Randy Orton. The match, originally made by Eric Bischoff was scheduled to be Goldberg vs. Triple H in a no DQ match, but the Co-General Manager Steve Austin changed it to a an Elimination Chamber match, and named the other opponents. Although there had only been one other Elimination Chamber match prior to this one, this one was not as good as its predecessor. This was largely due to the fact that Goldberg was allowed to run roughshod over the remaining competitors Randy Orton, Shawn Michaels, and Chris Jericho (Nash was eliminated earlier) eliminating each of them in rapid succession while Triple H cowered in his chamber, sucking a lot of the intrigue out of the match. Eventually, and despite barely lifting a finger the entire match Triple H got the win with an assist from his trusty sledgehammer. The match was alright, but was certainly not great, and I feel actually made poor use of the gimmick. Once again, the fact that the rest of the match was just filler for Goldberg’s mini-streak that didn’t even pay off with him winning the match, made the entire thing feel unsatisfactory.

The remaining matches, outside of the four-way (which was decent), were pretty weak. The Tag Team Titles match wasn’t special, and the Undertaker vs. A-Train match was bad. Kane vs. Rob Van Dam at least had an alright back-story to it, as the recently unmasked Kane had turned on his friend and former tag team partner Rob Van Dam, but the match itself was an extended squash with a predictable ending. However, it was Shane McMahon vs. Eric Bischoff that really hurt the card, as the match was not only bad, but caused me to issue a 10 bonus point deduction due to the wrestling irrelevance of the two competitors.

And That’s the Bottom Line, ‘Cause Stone Cold Twittered So!

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XVI

SummerSlam 1990

The Heat Returns
August 27, 1990
The Spectrum
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Attendance: 19,304

Power & Glory (Hercules and Paul Roma) w/Slick defeated The Rockers (Marty Jannetty and Shawn Michaels).
Match Rating: 50, Match Weight: 1, Final Score: 50

Kerry Von Erich defeated WWF Intercontinental Champion Mr. Perfect w/Bobby Heenan.
Match Rating: 25, Match Weight: 1.5, Final Score: 37.5

Sensational Sherri defeated Sapphire via forfeit.

The Warlord w/Slick defeated Tito Santana.
Match Rating: 10, Match Weight: .5, Final Score: 5

The Hart Foundation (Bret Hart and Jim Neidhart) defeated WWF Tag Team Champions Demolition (Smash and Crush) in a 2 Out of 3 Falls Match.
Match Rating: 80, Match Weight: 2, Final Score: 160

Jake Roberts defeated Bad News Brown with The Big Bossman as the referee.
Match Rating: 45, Match Weight: 1.5, Final Score: 67.5

Nikolai Volkoff & Jim Duggan defeated The Orient Express (Tanaka and Sato) w/Mr. Fuji.
Match Rating: 20, Match Weight: .5, Final Score: 10

Randy Savage w/Sensational Sherri defeated Dusty Rhodes.
Match Rating: 20, Match Weight: 2, Final Score: 40

Hulk Hogan defeated Earthquake w/Jimmy Hart and Dino Bravo via countout.
Match Rating: 50, Match Weight: 2.5, Final Score: 125

WWF Champion The Ultimate Warrior defeated Rick Rude w/Bobby Heenan in a Steel Cage Match.
Match Rating: 40, Match Weight: 2.5, Final Score: 100

Total Possible Points: 1400; With an Average of: 155.56
Final Ranking of Weight and Curved Score: 10; 57.144
Match Quality Total: 595
Match Quality Percentage: ((595/1400)*100) = 42.5
Final Ranking of Match Quality and Curved Score: 17; 23.81
Subtotal: ((57.144+23.81)/2) = 40.477
Bonuses and Deductions: -10 For not having a hyped match: Sherri vs. Sapphire; +10 For the Double Main Event; +10 For a Steel Cage Match; +5 For the Guest Referee Match
(0.7*40.477) + (0.3*65) = Final Score: 47.83

I would argue that this, the third SummerSlam, is the first non-WrestleMania pay per view to have a WrestleMania like feel to it. For the first time in the history of the event the WWF Championship was on the line as the Ultimate Warrior defended it against Rick Rude in a Steel Cage Match. Also, Hulk Hogan was making his long awaited return to the ring to battle the man who had put him out of action for several months, Earthquake. In addition to those matches, Dusty Rhodes and Sapphire were scheduled to finish off their longstanding feud with the “Macho King” Randy Savage and Sensational “Queen” Sherri in separate matches. Rounding out the card was the 2 out of 3 falls match for the Tag Team Titles, an Intercontinental Title match, and a match featuring Jake Roberts and his python Damien and Bad News Brown and his 200 pounds of Harlem sewer rats. This “big time” feel is reflected in Total Possible Points. The problem with the show is that a number of the big matches didn’t live up to their hype.

The match between Hogan and Earthquake had been built up for months and was Hulk Hogan’s first major feud that didn’t involve the WWF Title in years. Unfortunately the match was disappointing when compared to its hype. Earthquake looked strong throughout most of the match, countering or shrugging off most of Hogan’s offense, but eventually Hogan gained control and even survived Earthquake’s devastating finishing move. The match ended in a dissatisfying countout victory for Hogan, presumably to keep the feud between the two alive, but despite a Survivor Series match encounter, and Hogan eliminating Earthquake to win the Royal Rumble, the two never had a high profile rematch.

The other main event, featuring Rick Rude challenging the Ultimate Warrior for the WWF Title in the cage, was equally disappointing. Rude and Warrior had managed to make magic happen at WrestleMania V, and the year before at SummerSlam 89, but for some reason they just weren’t very good inside the cage. The short length of the match (ten minutes) may have had a bit of a bearing on its quality, but for the most part the two just couldn’t get anything really exciting going, with the exception of Rude hitting a move off the top of the cage. Warrior eventually decided it was time to finish off his challenger once and for all, gorilla press slammed him, and climbed over the top. Rude would leave the promotion shortly after this match.

The two other significant matches on the card, Savage vs. Rhodes, and Roberts vs. Brown were also disappointingly bad. However, the event had some memorable moments like Kerry Von Erich winning the Intercontinental Title, the Hart Foundation finally recapturing the Tag Team Titles in the best match of the night, and the return of Sgt. Slaughter as the Iraqi sympathizer on the Brother Love show.

XV

SummerSlam 2006

The Biggest Part of the Summer
August 20, 2006
TD Banknorth Garden
Boston, Massachusetts
Attendance: 16,168

Chavo Guerrero defeated Rey Mysterio.
Match Rating: 35, Match Weight: 1, Final Score: 35

ECW Champion The Big Show defeated Sabu in an Extreme Rules Match.
Match Rating: 20, Match Weight: 1.5, Final Score: 30

Hulk Hogan defeated Randy Orton.
Match Rating: 20, Match Weight: 2, Final Score: 40

Ric Flair defeated Mick Foley w/Melina in an “I Quit” Match.
Match Rating: 70, Match Weight: 1.5, Final Score: 105

Batista defeated World Heavyweight Champion King Booker w/Queen Sharmell via disqualification.
Match Rating: 30, Match Weight: 2, Final Score: 60

D-Generation X (Shawn Michaels and Triple H defeated Vince and Shane McMahon.
Match Rating: 40, Match Weight: 2, Final Score: 80

WWE Champion Edge defeated John Cena.
Match Rating: 70, Match Weight: 2.5, Final Score: 175

Total Possible Points: 1250; With an Average of: 178.57
Final Ranking of Weight and Curved Score: 2; 95.24
Match Quality Total: 525
Match Quality Percentage: ((525/1250)*100) = 42
Final Ranking of Match Quality and Curved Score: 18; 19.048
Subtotal: ((95.24+19.048)/2) = 57.144
Bonuses and Deductions: -30 For Irrelevant Wrestlers: Hulk Hogan, Mick Foley, Vince McMahon, and Shane McMahon; +5 For the Post Brand Extension Double Main Event; +5 For the “I Quit” Match
(0.7*57.144) + (0.3*30) = Final Score: 49

I think that this event perfectly illustrates why weighting the matches is important. This SummerSlam turned out to be a real turd of a show. However, most of the matches were well hyped, well built, and featured big name competitors. There were five big matches scheduled for the event. The WWE Title match between the champion Edge and John Cena, and the World Heavyweight Title match between the champion King Booker and Batista were the scheduled main events.

The other big matches were Mick Foley vs. Ric Flair in an “I Quit” Match, Hulk Hogan vs. “The Legend Killer” Randy Orton, and the recently reunited D-generation X against Vince and Shane McMahon. Despite the fact that these three matches featured major stars, and thus looked like important matches, the fact of the matter was that each of these matches featured competitors who really did nothing, or very little to further their respective storylines coming out of the show. Mick Foley left shortly after SummerSlam, Hogan simply squashed Orton and collected a check, and while the McMahon’s continued to feud with DX they did so at the expense of nearly everyone else on the roster. The end result of all of this is three big matches (only one of which was good) that have little to no major impact or a detrimental impact on the subsequent storyline.

In addition to these bad or irrelevant matches, the World Heavyweight Title match was pretty awful too. King Booker tried but was unable to get much of a match out the recently returned Batista. The end of the match saw Booker miss his scissors-kick and Batista hit (of all things) a jackhammer. Soon after Batista set Booker up for the Batista-bomb, which caused Sharmell to interfere in the match, drawing a dissatisfying disqualification.

The one good and relevant match to come out of the event was the WWE Title match between Edge and Cena, who had history dating back to New Year’s Revolution when Edge took advantage of his Money in the Bank privilege and defeated Cena for the WWE Title. Ever the desperate champion, Edge did everything he could to stave off Cena’s offense, and he surprisingly ended up being successful. However, it took interference from Lita and a set of brass knuckles to do it. The match set up their more memorable encounter a month later at Unforgiven, where Cena defeated Edge in a TLC match.

Despite two decent matches, the show was dragged down by the terrible and formulaic match between Hogan and Orton, and the match between the McMahon’s and DX. This match also saw DX burry the World Tag Team Champions the Spirit Squad, major players from the SmackDown roster Ken Kennedy, William Regal and Finlay, and the ECW Champion The Big Show. However, I will state that the event, on paper, is one of the more loaded SummerSlams in history, and there is a part of me that would rather see crappy matches featuring major talent than a bunch of filler matches featuring guys like Barry Horowitz, Dino Bravo, and Hercules.

XIV

SummerSlam 1997

Hart and Soul
August 3, 1997
Continental Airlines Arena
East Rutherford, New Jersey
Attendance: 20,213

Mankind defeated Hunter Hearst Helmsley w/Chyna in a Steel Cage Match.
Match Rating: 40, Match Weight: 1.5, Final Score: 60

Goldust w/Marlena defeated Brian Pillman with a pre-match stipulation of the loser wears a dress.
Match Rating: 15, Match Weight: 1, Final Score: 15

The Road Warriors (Hawk and Animal) defeated The Godwinns (Henry O and Phineas I).
Match Rating: 40, Match Weight: 1, Final Score: 40

WWF European Champion Davey Boy Smith defeated Ken Shamrock by disqualification.
Match Rating: 55, Match Weight: 1.5, Final Score: 82.5

Los Boricuas (Savio Vega, Miguel Perez Jr., Jose Estrada Jr., and Jesus Castillo) defeated The Disciples of Apocalypse (Crush, Chainz, 8-Ball, and Skull).
Match Rating: 5, Match Weight: .5, Final Score: 2.5

Steve Austin defeated WWF Intercontinental Champion Owen Hart in a Kiss My Ass Match.
Match Rating: 80, Match Weight: 2, Final Score: 160

Bret Hart defeated WWF Champion The Undertaker, with Shawn Michaels as the referee.
Match Rating: 70, Match Weight: 2.5, Final Score: 175

Total Possible Points: 1000; With an Average of: 142.86
Final Ranking of Weight and Curved Score: 18; 19.048
Match Quality Total: 535
Match Quality Percentage: ((535/1000)*100) = 53.5
Final Ranking of Match Quality and Curved Score: 9; 61.906
Subtotal: ((19.048+61.906)/2) = 40.477
Bonuses and Deductions: + 10 For the Steel Cage Match; +10 For Two Stipulation Matches; + 5 For the Guest Referee Match
(0.7*40.477) + (0.3*75) = Final Score: 50.83

This is the first SummerSlam on this list that I wouldn’t qualify as bad. It’s not great, but it is certainly watchable. The focus of SummerSlam 1997 was the Hart Foundation’s, made up of Bret Hart, Owen Hart, Davey Boy Smith, Jim Neidhart and Brian Pillman, quest to rule the WWF. Going into the event the Foundation controlled the Intercontinental and European Titles, and with Bret Hart challenging the Undertaker for the WWF Title the group was poised to leave the event with all of the singles championships. However, Smith would have to get past Ken Shamrock, and Owen Hart would have the very difficult task of defeating Steve Austin if the Harts were going to walk out with all of the gold. In addition to those matches one half of the Tag Team Champions, Mankind, found himself going against the reigning King of the Ring, Hunter Hearst Helmsley in a steel cage match.

Although it wasn’t the main event, the most intense feud going into the event was between Steve Austin and Owen Hart. Hart had scored somewhat of an upset victory over Austin in a big ten man tag the month before at Canadian Stampede, and Owen had been rubbing it in Austin’s face ever since. In the war of words between the two Austin had promised to either win Hart’s Intercontinental Title or kiss his ass. The quality of the match is often overlooked because of what happened at the end of it. Having worked over Austin’s neck most of the match Owen Hart set him up for what looked like a Tombstone piledriver, but instead of dropping to his knees Hart fell backwards and severely injured Austin in the process, temporarily paralyzing him. Austin managed to recover enough to score a weak, and very fake looking roll up victory. However the bigger story was the injury, which plagued Austin the rest of his career.

Bret Hart vs. The Undertaker was the main event, but the match was overshadowed by the ongoing feud between the “Hitman” and Shawn Michaels who was scheduled to be the referee for the match. The scripted animosity between the two had boiled over into real life, and just months earlier the two had exchanged blows in a legitimate locker room fight. Because of their rivalry and mutual distrust Michaels was saddled with the stipulation that if he was biased against Hart he would never be allowed to wrestle in the United States again, the same stipulation that Hart set upon himself if he didn’t win the title. In the end, the stipulation on Michaels came into play. Hart was attempting to use a chair on the Undertaker when Michaels grabbed it from him. The two rivals exchanged words and Hart ended up spitting in Michaels’s face. In retaliation Michaels swung the chair at him, but Hart ducked and the chair struck Undertaker instead. Due to the stipulations Michaels counted Undertaker’s shoulders down and Hart became the WWF Champion. It was the first time the WWF Title had changed hands at SummerSlam.

The rest of the show ranged from a few filler matches like Los Boricuas vs. Disciples of Apocalypse, to high profile rivalries like Hunter Hearst Helmsley vs. Mankind, but nothing else stood out much. What the event did provide was a significant shift in the direction of the WWF. Due to his actions against The Undertaker, Shawn Michaels turned heel and formed D-generation X with Hunter Hearst Helmsley who quickly became Triple H. Bret Hart found himself being pushed out of the promotion. And despite his injury, Steve Austin sowed the seeds for his feud with Vince McMahon by giving him the Stone Cold Stunner in Madison Square Garden just a few weeks later.

XIII

SummerSlam 1996

Opposites Attack!
August 18, 1996
Gund Arena
Cleveland, Ohio
Attendance: 17,000 (approx.)

Owen Hart defeated Savio Vega.
Match Rating: 50, Match Weight: 1, Final Score: 50

WWF Tag Team Champions The Smokin’ Gunns (Billy and Bart) w/Sunny defeated The Bodydonnas (Skip & Zip), The New Rockers (Leif Cassidy & Marty Jannetty) and The Godwinns (Henry O and Phineas I) in a Four Way Elimination Match.
Match Rating: 20, Match Weight: 1, Final Score: 20

Sid defeated Davey Boy Smith.
Match Rating: 30, Match Weight: 1.5, Final Score: 45

Goldust w/Marlena defeated Marc Mero w/Sable.
Match Rating: 20, Match Weight: 1, Final Score: 20

Jerry Lawler defeated Jake Roberts.
Match Rating: 0, Match Weight: 2, Final Score: 0

Mankind defeated Undertaker in a Boiler Room Brawl.
Match Rating: 70, Match Weight: 2, Final Score: 140

WWF Champion Shawn Michaels w/Jose Lothario defeated Vader w/Jim Cornette.
Match Rating: 85, Match Weight: 2.5, Final Score: 212.5

Total Possible Points: 1100; With an Average of: 157.14
Final Ranking of Weight and Curved Score: 9; 61.906
Match Quality Total: 487.5
Match Quality Percentage: ((487.5/1100)*100) = 44.32
Final Ranking of Match Quality and Curved Score: 14; 38.096
Subtotal: ((61.906+38.096)/2) = 50.001
Bonuses and Deductions: +10 For Boiler Room Brawl
(0.7*50.001)+ (0.3*60) = Final Score: 53

SummerSlam 1996 was a bit of a two match event. I’m not saying that there were only two good matches, but because matches were being added to the card just a week before the event (I don’t even remember Owen Hart vs. Savio Vega being announced before the show). The two big matches were The Undertaker vs. Mankind in the first ever Boiler Room Brawl, and Shawn Michaels defending his WWF Title against Vader.

The build up to the Boiler Room Brawl started the night after WrestleMania XII, when Mankind came out of nowhere to attack The Undertaker. The two met at King of the Ring, and Mankind surprisingly earned the victory when Paul Bearer accidentally struck the Undertaker with his urn. The structure of the match was fairly simple, the two combatants would start their fight in the depths of the arena’s boiler room. The first one to make it to the ring and retrieve the urn from Paul Bearer would be declared the winner. The brawl itself was quite brutal and included a sick moment where Mankind took a bump off of a ladder onto the concrete floor. In hindsight the match feels like a bit of a precursor to the backstage portions of various hardcore matches the WWF would start having a few years later, but at the time this kind of brawling was new for the promotion. The end saw The Undertaker throw Mankind off of the ring apron onto the concrete arena floor. He then went to retrieve the urn, but Bearer turned on him, struck him with it, and handed it to Mankind.

It has been heavily rumored that Michaels was supposed to lose the WWF Title to Vader in the main event, but threw a fit before the show. I have no idea if the rumor is true but it didn’t keep them from having a great match. Vader had been built up as an unstoppable monster for months and actually pinned Michaels at In Your House: International Incident the month before. The tag line for the event was Opposites Attack, and the statement held true for this match, as Michaels used his speed and agility, while Vader used his girth and power. Michaels tried to take the fight to Vader, but he countered or shrugged off most of Michaels’s offense. At one point the two tumbled over the top rope and Vader attacked Michaels on the outside leading to Vader getting the countout victory. However, Jim Cornette, Vader’s manager chastised Michaels and goaded him into restarting the match. Only a few minutes later Michaels got himself disqualified when he struck Vader with Cornette’s tennis racket. Once again Cornette convinced Michaels to restart the match, only this time Michaels was able to hit a moonsault and keep Vader’s shoulders down for the three count.

The other matches on the card were hit-or-miss. Hart vs. Vega was fun, but not built up at all and Bulldog vs. Sid was alright but was mostly an extended squash for Sid. Lawler vs. Roberts, a match that had some build, was really bad. The feud was centered on Lawler accusing Roberts, a recovered drug and alcohol addict, of falling off the wagon. Sadly Roberts actually had, and the match most likely was an exercise in humiliation for Roberts who was assaulted by giant liquor bottles and had booze spilled all over his face.

Despite the weak undercard, the 1996 Summer Slam was a pretty good show. The characters had matured drastically from the year before, and were far more believable than wrestling race car drivers, dentists, plumbers, and pirates. This event continued the promotion’s steps in the right direction that had started at WrestleMania XII.

XII

SummerSlam 2004

Let the Games Begin
August 15, 2004
Air Canada Center
Toronto, Ontario
Attendance: 17,640

The Dudley Boyz (Bubba Ray, D-Von and WWE Cruiserweight Champion Spike) defeated Rey Mysterio and The WWE Tag Team Champions Paul London and Billy Kidman.
Match Rating: 40, Match Weight: .5, Final Score: 20

Kane defeated Matt Hardy w/Lita in a Till Death Do Us Part Match.
Match Rating: 25, Match Weight: 1.5, Final Score: 37.5

WWE United States Champion John Cena defeated Booker T in Match 1 of a Best of 5 Series.
Match Rating: 20, Match Weight: 1, Final Score: 20

WWF Intercontinental Champion Edge defeated Chris Jericho and Batista in a Triple Threat Match.
Match Rating: 35, Match Weight: 1.5, Final Score: 52.5

Kurt Angle w/Luther Reigns defeated Eddie Guerrero.
Match Rating: 60, Match Weight: 2, Final Score: 120

Triple H w/Ric Flair defeated Eugene.
Match Rating: 45, Match Weight: 1.5, Final Score: 67.5

(Diva Search Contestants (Joy Giovanni, Amy Webber, Tracie Wright, Maria, Christy Hemme and Michelle McCool) defeated RAW Divas (Victoria, Gail Kim, Jazz, Stacy Keibler, Molly Holly and Nidia) in a Dodge Ball Game.)

WWE Champion John “Bradshaw” Layfield defeated Undertaker via disqualification.
Match Rating: 25, Match Weight: 2.5, Final Score: 62.5

Randy Orton defeated World Heavyweight Champion Chris Benoit.
Match Rating: 70, Match Weight: 2.5, Final Score: 175

Total Possible Points: 1300; With an Average of: 162.5
Final Ranking of Weight and Curved Score: 6; 76.192
Match Quality Total: 555
Match Quality Percentage: ((535/1300)*100) = 42.69
Final Ranking of Match Quality and Curved Score: 16; 28.572
Subtotal: ((76.192+28.572)/2) = 52.382
Bonuses and Deductions: + 5 For the Stipulation Match; +5 For the Post Brand Extension Double Main Event
(0.7*52.382) + (0.3*60) = Final Score: 54.67

SummerSlam 2004 may be best remembered for Randy Orton’s victory over Chris Benoit for the World Heavyweight Title and being the start of his failed, first, main event push. The event was pretty loaded and also featured John “Bradshaw” Layfield defending his newly won WWE Title against The Undertaker, Kurt Angle vs. Eddie Guerrero in a WrestleMania XX rematch, Triple H going against the simple-minded Eugene, and Matt Hardy defending his girlfriend Lita against the advances of Kane.

The two World Championship matches were almost night and day opposites. The first one, JBL vs. The Undertaker was terrible and is the main reason this event didn’t make it into the top ten. At this point most fans were still in shock that JBL, a man who only a few months before the event had been a member of an over-the-hill tag team, was WWE Champion, and many hoped that he would simply transition the title from Eddie Guerrero to a more suitable champion than himself. The recently “dead again” Undertaker seemed to fit the bill. The Toronto crowd was so bored by the slugfest that they started doing the wave during the match. Finally after nearly twenty sloppy minutes The Undertaker set JBL up for the Tombstone, but JBL’s lackey Orlando Jordon entered the ring with the belt. Undertaker attacked him, grabbed the belt and hit JBL with it, drawing the disqualification. After the match Undertaker delivered a Last Ride to JBL on the top of his rigged limo, sending him through the roof.

The final match of the night pitted Randy Orton against the World Heavyweight Champion Chris Benoit. As a member of Evolution, Orton had benefited greatly from his associations with Triple H and Ric Flair, a very lengthy Intercontinental Title reign, and a career-making feud with Mick Foley. At this point in his young career the crowd was starting to really like the evil Orton, but he was still playing a heel heading into this match. Benoit had won the World Heavyweight Title in a tremendous match at WrestleMania XX, but had nevertheless been pushed down the card in favor of the Triple H, Shawn Michaels feud. Compared to SmackDown’s main event, this match was incredible, but by itself it was only an above average main event. Benoit did an excellent job doing everything he could to make Orton look like, not only a threat, but a legitimate contender to the title. The finish saw Orton hit the RKO off of what looked like a simple exchange. The suddenness of the move and the fact that it resulted in Orton’s victory really made it look devastating. Orton wouldn’t have long to celebrate as champion, as the next night Evolution turned on him and Triple H took the title from him at the next pay per view.

The rest of the card was fairly good, as the other big matches were of decent quality. The other thing that really stood out at this particular SummerSlam was the audience. I am personally and academically very interested in the way the audience has the ability to affect the performances of the wrestlers and the direction of the narrative, so for me, listing to the audience is interesting. However, from the viewpoint of a fan, the Toronto crowd was filled with smart-marks and was as annoying as hell. I’m all for booing and cheering whoever you want, but I think the crowd reactions actually managed to drag town the quality of some of the matches, either because the wrestlers started to get irritated, or simply because it’s impossible to separate the audience’s role in the show from the overall performance.

That wraps up this weeks column. If you didn’t like the format, or you thought there was way too much math for a wrestling article, I’m sorry to tell you that next week will be more of the same as I’ll be finishing my review of all of the SummerSlams. However, let me know what you think about it (I know you will). Also, in two weeks, I’m going to finish off my build up to SummerSlam with a “Top Ten SummerSlam Moments” column. Let me know some of your favorite moments from the event’s history, so they are not just my favorite moments.