411’s WWE Raw Report 08.25.03

411’s WWE Raw Report 8.28.03
Live from Tucson, AX
Announcers are JR & The King
Report done *EXCLUSIVELY* for 411MANIA by PK

The show starts with footage of Goldberg being helped away from the Elimination Chamber. He is all messed up.

Intro…

Goldberg comes out and calls out HHH right away. Evolution comes out, and HHH takes is shirt off, to show that he is just as strong as Goldberg is. HHH then says that he proved how great he is last night. Goldberg says that he will stalk HHH until he gets his shot at the World Title. HHH tells Goldberg that the only reason why Goldberg is still walking is because Orton and Flair pulled him off last night. HHH has an idea to put his title on the line at Unforgiven, but Goldberg has to put his career on the line. HHH makes sure to say that this doesn’t mean he can go over to SmackDown and go through their “Paper Champion,” but he leaves WWE for good! WOW! Goldberg says that he is on.

Commercials.

Trish Stratus vs. Gail Kim
Gail jumps Trish during her entrance. Gail works over Trish, locks on a sleeper, but Trish fights out using Spanky’s “Sliced Bread #2.” Trish with a huge Spinebuster for 2. Trish with the chin kick for 2. Trish then nails StratusFaction for the win.
Winner – Trish

Molly strolls out and drills Trish, running her into the steel railing. Molly then enters the ring and stares down Gail.

Recap of Bischoff claiming to nail Linda McMahon. Linda will be in the Highlight Reel.

WMXX Recall – Austin winning the title for the first time in 1998 against HBK with Mike Tyson as the special enforcer.

Commercials.

Molly has her hands around Gail’s throat, and reminds Gail that she brought Gail into the company, and they will team up against Trish. This is interesting actually.

Long and Mack come out, and Long says that he was contacted about expanding his “Thuggin & Buggin Enterprises.” He then introduces Mark Henry. Yay!

Rodney Mack & Mark Henry (w/ Theodore Long) vs. Garrison Cade & Mark Jindrak
Cade and Mack go back and forth, but Henry gets in, sends Cade to the outside, and squashes Jindrak with a huge powerslam.
Winners – Mack & Henry

Storm and Goldust talking about Goldust sending Storm into the woman’s locker room last week. Apperently, Goldust set up Storm, and Mini-Goldust is now humping Storm’s leg. HAHA. Rosie enters and asks if Storm knew of a commotion in the ring. Storm says he has his own problems, pointing to Mini-Goldust. So, Rosie catches up with TE1’s Jessie, who is now a backstage worker I guess. Jessie says that there is a guy in the ring with a gun, and Rosie bolts. Hurricane follows after finding out that she was talking about the gun that shoots T-Shirts into the crowd. HAHA.

Commercials.

During the commercial, Rosie came out and nailed the T-Shirt guy with the side slam. HAHA. Hurricane comes out the wonder “What’sUpWitDat?!?”

Recap of Coach beating down Shane.

Terri with Stone Cold, he runs down what happened last night when he was provoked by Coach and Bischoff. Bischoff comes in and says that that was Stone Cold’s side of the story, and since Coach proclaimed that he works for Eric Bischoff, he will be awarded “Employee of the Month.” HAHAHA.

Commercials.

411 Figures own Mike Batesman reports to me that Hawk from Tough Enough 2 is on “Meet My Folks” tonight. We will keep you posted.

Blast of the Night – La Rez’s doop on the Dudz last week.

La Rez and Rob Conway come down, and Conway gets on the mic. He says that he is an American, but then bad mouths the government, then calls the USA the real terrorist. WOW.

La Resistance & Rob Conway vs. The Dudley Boyz
Dudz music hits, and Spike comes out…but no Bubba and D’Von, but wait, the hit La Rez from behind. The whole match is a huge melee, Spike nails Conway and Dupree with a Dudley Dog, and Greiner gets a 3D. Bubba tosses Spike out of the ring on Dupree, but while the refs back was turned, Conway nails Bubba with a tag title belt for the pin.
Winners – La Rez & Conway

Linda walking toward the ring for the Highlight Reel.

Commercials.

Recap of Kane killing RVD last night.

Chris Jericho’s Highlight Reel
Jericho says that he knows that everyone is upset at the cuts and bruises on his face from last night. But getting past that, we move to footage of Bischoff laying one on Linda McMahon. He brings out Linda as his guest. HAHAHA, her old theme music (The Old WM theme) is back!! Jericho asks if she and Bischoff did it. Linda says that the truth is that Bischoff is a “Very Creative Liar,” and a that as soon as they left the live feed, security came and escorted him away. Linda then says that what Bischoff did deserved consequences. She was going to fire him, but she knew that Vince would just hire him back. This cues Vince. Vince says that there will be no punishment to Bischoff. Vince then says that he is the only victim here, and it is because of their failed marriage, and it is because of the kids that was “born from her demon womb.” HAHA. Vince says that he may need the kids one day then. Vince then says that he feels like Kane, and that everyone has turned their back on him. Shane comes out and gets in Vince’s face. Shane hopes the Vince will rot in hell. Jericho steps in and says that Vince deserves respect, and slams Shane in the side of the head with the mic. Jericho beats down Shane, and Vince makes Shane vs. Jericho for tonight!

Commercials.

Randy Orton (w/ Ric Flair) vs. Maven (w/ Shawn Michaels)
ChiLLot: main event the ppv, then go back to facing people like Maven the next day, great push Orton
My thoughts exactly, thanks ChiLLot. Maven waits at the top of the ramp and brings out HBK to his corner. Maven and Orton go back and forth, they both hit a drop kick at the same time. Orton fights back, nails a neckbreaker for 2. Maven reverses a scoop slam and runs Orton into the ropes, where Flair gets a cheap shot it. HBK then superkicks Flair. Maven reverses the RKO, and goes to the top to hit a Crossbody for 2. Orton reverses an Irish whip, and hangs Maven on the ropes. Maven then turns into the RKO. Orton pulls Maven up at 2, and nails Sweet Chinmusic to mock HBK for the win.
Winner – Orton

Bischoff polishing the “Employee of the Month” plaque that he will give Coach. HAHA.

Commercials.

Terri with Funkmaster Flex. They start talking about his new show on SpikeTV. Whatever.

Bischoff out to award Coach. Coach comes out to the RAW Theme song. Coach says that Stone Cold wasn’t provoked. Coach then says that he is glad he has earned his position, and not put there because he isn’t Stone Cold’s boy, and he stares right over to JR. They then roll the footage of JR kicking Coach out of his seat a few weeks back when JR returned. He says that he will get an apology from JR sooner or later, but right now, he wants an apology from Austin. Christian comes down, and says the he deserves an apology as well, because Stone Cold purposely left him off of SummerSlam last night. Stone Cold then comes out. He gets in Coach’s face, and says that Coach can’t carry JR’s jock, and gives Coach the finger. Coach calls the broadcast team a joke. King gets a mic and says that he will shove Coach’s award in the only place in Arizona where the sun doesn’t shine. Christian chimes in with “EXCUSE ME, EXCUSE ME, INTERCONTINENTAL CHAMPION TALKING!” HAHAHA. He is sick of being ignored. Austin shuts him and says that he will wrestle tonight, and he will put his title on the line against Jerry Lawler!

Commercials.

Batesman chimes in again to the tell me that Hawk has been elminated from “Meet My Folks.” So sad.

Christian (c) vs. Jerry “The King” Lawler – WWE Intercontinental Title
Christian jumps Lawler. They go back and forth with nothing really happening. Coach and JR banter back and forth at the booth. Coach goes down and trips up Lawler, and Christian rolls King up for the pin.
Winner – Christian

Shane is walking for his match with Jericho, but Kane is lurking in the shadows.

Commercials.

JR reading the ads, and Coach intrupts with an interview with Christian, Christian says that he keeps his title with hard work. Coach sends it back to the booth, but Austin steps in and says that before he sends it back, he makes a match for next week with Coach facing Lawler.

Shane McMahon vs. Chris Jericho
Shane starts off strong on Jericho, but Jericho with a thumb to the eyes, takes over the the match. Jericho comes off the ropes, but Shane dumps him over the top. Shane lays Jericho on the ring table, and goes to the top for his signature elbow drop. Kane’s music hits, and Shane gets distracted. Kane never comes out, and Jericho jumps Shane right before a…

Commercial.

We come back to Jericho punching Shane. Shane with a huge DDT for 2. Jericho off the ropes, Shane nails a back elbow, then a few punches, and a clothesline for 2. Jericho dodges another clothesline, and nails a kick to the back of Shane’s head for 2. Jericho goes for a Lionsault, but Shane gets the knees up. Shane to the top, but Jericho shoves the ref in the ropes to knock Shane on his nuts. Jericho then nails a SUPERPLEX. Kane then finally comes out, and Jericho leaves quickly. Kane gives Shane a choke slam, and leaves through the crowd. Shane gets up and see Kane leaving, and follows.
No Contest.

They go outside and Kane jumps Shane again. Kane then tosses Shane into a concrete wall. Kane fills a dumpster up with gasoline, and lights it on fire. Kane goes to toss Shane in the flaming dumpster, but Shane slides off Kane’s shoulder, and dropkicks Kane in the dumpster! WOW!

Decent show tonight.

~PK