411’s WCW Monday Nitro Report 3.26.01

WCW Monday Nitro Report 3.26.01
Live From Panama City
Announcers will probably never be on TV again
Report by Widro

WCW Logo

HOLY SHIT! It’s Vince McMahon with the WWF Raw logo. He is grinning. He said he is addressing all WCW fans and superstars. He rubs his hands like an evil genius. All our futures are in HIS hands.

WCW Open

Scott and Tony are floored by “Mr. McMahon” and how he will address us tonight.

Here comes Ric Flair. He talks about McMahon and how he can’t take the WCW legacy. He was told not to go on this show by a friend, knowing it’s the last time on TNT or TBS. He goes through all the big superstars for WCW. He said WCW has run neck and neck with WWF. Takes off the sportsjacket! It’s always been about WWF vs. WCW. Flair runs down McMahon for not being one of the boys. Flair says WCW is the best and McMahon can’t hold us down. He says if one guy is going to wrestle Flair on the last WCW show, it’s Sting! Huge Sting chant! This rules! What a perfect choice to end WCW!

Commercial Break

AHHHH WCW Spring Break crap with Rikki Rachtman! Turn this off!

WCW World Title vs. WCW US Title
Big Poppa Pump (c) vs. Booker T (c)
It’s so weird to hear Tony talk about Mr. McMahon. Lockup and Booker T with some movements. Steiner clothesline, Booker T ducks and Harlem Sidekick for 2. You can already tell the production is better. Clothesline out of the corner by Booker T for 2. Brawling moves to the floor, and Midajah gets involved. Steiner uses the STEEEEEEL pipe. Misses Booker T, but still is in control. Back in the ring, and Scott with a clotheslie, and a biceps kiss elbow drop. No cover, some pushups. Steiner controls. Submission move, Booker T fights up. Booker T puts his head down, and Steiner hits him. Dropkick by Booker T! Booker T with the axe kick!! Pancake. Spin a roony! Hudson calls it such. Harlem sidekick. Book End attempt, Steiner reverses into a bridged Northern Lights suplex for 2. Steiner powerbomb attempt, Booker T floats forward, and hits the Book End!
Winner and NEW WCW Champion: Booker T

Tony oversells like a madman. Replays. Booker T celebrates…

Commercial Break

WCW Spring Break crap with Rikki Rachtman continues!

Vince on the phone backstage! He mocks WCW for making their last broadcast from a hick place in Florida.

WCW Cruiserweight Tag Team Title #1 Contendership
Evan and Shannon vs. Jung Dragons vs. Rey and Kidman
Dragons and Kidman. Shannon rolls up Kidman. Evan with a face jam on Kaz. He drives the Caddy! Yang attacks Evan then mocks him. Rey flies at Yang on the floor. Kaz flies at him. Evan flies at them. Shannon follows. Shannon from the top! Kidman with a Kid-ma-kaze! Rey and Yang in the ring. Yang up top for a twisting corkscrew moonsault. Cover, and Kidman makes the save. Goes for the Kid Crusher, Shannon comes in. He hits the Bottoms Up, and Kaz makes the save. Dragons with a sick double team powerbomb on Shannon, Evan saves. Kidman and Yang in the ring. Evan with a Diamond Cutter on Kaz. 450 by Evan! All on the floor. Rey does the broncobuster, but Shannon gets a boot up. Rey sends Shannon to the apron. Rey does the legdrop from the top with Shannon draped in the ropes. Cover and they pin.
Winners: Rey and Kidman

Later tonight: Sting vs. Flair

Commercial Break

Vince on the phone. Talks about vague talent, and in comes Trish. She has champagne, and she wants to celebrate. The real way to celebrate is nookie, implies Mr. McMahon. Then they make out. Ewwww.

WCW Cruiserweight Title
Shane Helms (c) vs. Chavo Guerrero Jr.
Gotta love that Shane entrance. Chavo attacks from behind. Shane with a fireman’s carry into his knee face first. Shane goes back to work. To the floor briefly, and Chavo takes control. Back in, belly to back by Chavo. Chavo beats him into the corner. Sets up for a superplex. Shane tosses him off. Top rope sunset flip for 2. Crowd is dead. Big clothesline by Chavo, cover for 2. Huge chop by Chavo. High cross body by Shane. Back and forth. Chavo hits a t bone suplex for 2. More maneuvering, Northern Lights suplex bridged for 2 by Chavo. Shane with a cool sunset flip for 2. Gut wrench backbreaker by Shane. Sugar Smack ducked, Chavo goes for inverse DDT, Shane floats over and then hits a Sugar Smack. Signals for Vertebreaker. Chavo floats out of it, back and forth reversals, and there is the Vertebreaker.
Winner and STILL champ: Shane Helms

Commercial Break

Backstage, Booker T holds the World and US Titles and he would like to say it’s the end of a chapter, but there are many many more pages left in this book. He wants to prove he is the best. Don’t hate the playa, hate the game.

Team Canada is here. Storm on the mic. He wants the titles. They play the anthem.

Commercial Break

Vince and Trish in afterglow. It’s Michael Cole with a mic. Cole asks Vince about the status of WCW. What about WCW wrestlers? McMahon tosses him out.

Tony and Scott are worried.

WCW Tag Team Titles
Lance Storm and Mike Awesome vs. Palumbo and O’Haire (c)
O’Haire and Storm to start. Back and forth. Tag to Chuck. USA chant. Champs get Storm in their corner. Chuck catches Storm with a fall away slam. Superkick by Storm on Chuck. Chuck with those SUPER hard shots on Awesome, but Awesome flies around a bunch. Storm back in, and catapult by Chuck on Storm. Seated dropkick by Storm. Both men down. Hot tag to O’Haire, he takes out both. Fireman’s carry slam on Awesome, Storm makes the save. Chuck in with some vicious right hand. All four in the ring. Team Canada clears O to the floor, Double team on Chuck. O grabs Storm’s legs. Awesome has Chuck for an Awesomebomb. Chuck floats back. Jungle kick! Sean back up, Seanton bomb!
Winners and STILL champ: O’Haire and Palumbo

Commercial Break

Look at JJ on a monitor on Raw! Maybe he’s not gone!

Bam Bam/Shawn video package.

Stacy is out for the Shawn and Stacy show.

The Mecca Of Manhood Shawn the Star Stasiak vs. Bam Bam Bigelow
BBB is out with a tattoo machine or something. BBB with power moves. He is in control. Shawn is up with some Stacy distraction. BBB gets the Greetings, and Stacy holds Shawn’s legs so he can float back. Shawn gets his SUPER LAME neckbreaker for the pin.
Winner: Shawn Stasiak

William Regal returns to Nitro! He is backstage with Vince, questions whether its smart to buy WCW. They plug Wrestlemania!

Commercial Break

Spring break stuff. Vince mocking Totally Buffed on Raw.

DDP earlier tonight talks about WCW. On this historic evening, he wanted to thank all the fans. He talks about himself for a while. He mentions Kimberly! Is his dream over? He doesn’t think so.

Video montage of WCW World Champions. Yup, they’re all there. Bret! Goldberg! Old guys! All that you can think of.

Commercial Break

Vince on the phone, it’s just about time.

WCW Tag Team Cruiserweight Titles
Primetime and Kid Romeo (c) vs. Rey and Kidman
Tony and Scott rip on Regal. Kidman and Skipper to start. Romeo in and the champs are in control early. Romeo tosses Kidman into the corner, Kidman gets a foot up. PT is in, Kidman with a high cross body for 2. Romeo up top, flies at Kidman who counters with a dropkick. Both down. Rey tagged in. All four in the ring. Rey with the broncobuster on Elix. They celebrate, Romeo is in, takes out Kidman, takes out Rey. Romeo hits his finished on Kidman, Rey saves. Powerbomb by Rey. Springboard headbutt by Rey, PT makes the save. Rey and Romeo clear to the floor, PT goes for his finisher, Kidman reverses into the Kid Crusher for the pin.
Winners and NEW champs: Rey and Kidman

Sting is backstage with some bats hanging all around him. He wouldn’t miss this for anything. He cuts a promo on Flair. What’s next for Sting? The only thing that is sure is that nothing is for sure.

Commercial Break

Vince McMahon walks down a corridor backstage.

It’s Flair vs. Sting ONE MORE TIME. They should have had Flair befriend Sting and then turn on him, just for old times sake.

Commercial Break

Ric Flair vs. Sting
Hudson: When it was en vogue to jump from the WWF to WCW, Sting stayed. Even Ric Flair jumped! Wow. Lockup, and Sting pushes Flair off. Huge Sting chant. Shoulder block by Sting. Another. Test of strength. Hudson and Tony recap Flair stabbing Sting in the back. Chops by Flair in the corner. Sting has had enough! He switches and works over Flair. Hip toss, dropkick, and Flair to the floor. Lockup, shoulder block and leapfrogs. Sting has a huge grin as Flair begs off in the corner. Flair struts! Flair goes to work. Sting with a Guerilla Press Slam. Ten punch count along by Sting. Flair flop! Sting chops, has Flair by the throat. Low blow uppercut by Flair. Stomps. Nice to see Flair with a shirt on. Knee drop by Flair. Flair strut! Flair stomps. He goes up top! We know what will happen, but we LOVE IT ONE MORE TIME! Sting grabs Flair and tosses him off! Sting with some clotheslines. Flair knocks him down. Flair goes for the figure four! Sting fighting it! Can he turn if over?? Sting is battling. Pinned for 2. And he does it! Sting turns it! Flair lets it go. Flair chops, but Sting no sells! Again! Sting flexes! This is so great. Sting with a turnbuckle flip, kinda botched, but still cool. Sting with the superplex! Scorpion Deathlock in the center on the ring! Flair taps!!!
Winner: Sting

Sting picks up Flair and they hug! They shake hands. A great moment. Both have a huge grin. Hug.

We cut to Raw. Both my TVs have the same thing on it.

Lilian Garcia announces Vince McMahon. He said this is being seen on both channels. Vince said he bought WCW. He said Time Warner couldn’t sell to anyone else, so he stepped in. They practically begged him. There is only one small caveat that they don’t know about. Vince says he’ll sign the deal at Wresltemania, when Ted Turner delivers the contract himself. WOW. Vince, how did you do it? He said he did it all on his own. How can you possible beat a billionaire? Become one yourself. He wants Turner to stay at WM and watch his match. He choked the life out of WCW. He asks what he should do with WCW? He can just put it on the shelf. He could do that. He mocks Hogan. He would get a great deal of pleasure watching the videos of them mocking him. Vince says he who laughs last, laughs best. He could turn WCW into the huge media conglomerate that WWF is today. He asks the crowd what to do what the superstars. Hogan, up? Boooo. Down… yaaay. Lex Luger up? Boooo. Down… yaaay. Buff up? Some cheers. Down. Boo. Booker T up? Mixed. Down. Nothing. Big Popp Pump up? Big cheer. Down. Nothing. Huge Goldberg chant. Sting? Cheers. Goldberg? HUGE CHEERS. Instead of gloating, he could have flown to Panama City Beach and give WCW a piece of his mind. He runs down WCW more. He would go in their faces and say “You’re Fired.” To Booker T, to Goldberg. He said WCW is going on the shelf, he is burying it. He said all of WCW will be buried. He demands respect and they boo. And here comes Shane to a gigantic pop.

Shane is in Panama City?? He’s on Nitro! Shane, where are you asks Vince? Shane says what’s up Vince. Surprise Dad, you’re in Cleveland Ohio, and I’m in Panama City Beach Florida. You wanted to finalize this deal at WM? You had the audacity to ask Turner to come down and finalize the deal. That’s the opportunity he was looking for. The deal is finalized. But it’s not bought by Vince McMahon, its owned by Shane McMahon. Shane now owns WCW! Just like WCW did in the past, kicked your ass in the past, it will again. That’s what’s going to happen to you at Wrestlemania.

Vince is in shock, and we just witnessed perhaps the craziest thing in wrestling history.