100 Percent Fordified: CHIKARA Green Ice

Vaughan, ONT – 3.24.2012

Commentary is provided by Bryce Remsburg, Gavin Loudspeaker, Arda Ocal, Eddie Kingston, Leonard F. Chikarason, and UltraMantis Black.

Simply put, Sara Del Rey says Kobald can no longer hide behind his keyboard. They will meet in the ring (finally) tonight.

Sara Del Rey vs. Kobald

Obariyon and Kodama are in Kobald’s corner. Kobald tries to charge Sara before the bell. Sara side steps the attack and kick Kobald to the floor. Obariyon and Kodama distract Sara to allow Kobald to attack Sara from behind. Sara chops Kobald back in the ring. Kobald bites her face and chokes her on the mat. Kobald spears Sara for two. Kobald puts on an abdominal stretch. Sara escapes and drops her knee into Kobald’s face multiple times. Kobald throws Sara’s face into the middle turnbuckle. Kobald delivers a couple of spears for a two count. Sara kicks Kobald until he trips her. A seated senton gets Kobald another two count. He stretches Sara out across his shoulders. Sara chops Kobald, then traps him in the ropes so she can kick his chest in. Kobald claws Sara’s face to break a seated abdominal stretch. Kobald drops multiple elbows but can’t get a pin. Sara boots Kobald to block a charge. Obariyon grabs Sara’s foot. That allows Kobald to suplex Sara on her head for two .Kobald misses a spear in the cornr. Sara gives him a Koppu kick and hooks on a cross armbreaker. Obariyon and Kodama try pushing the rope to Kobald, which makes Sara angry. Sara German suplexes Kobald for two. The Batiri get on the apron. Kobald rolls up the distracted Sara for the pin at 7:56. There was a lot of awkward interaction in this match and even by the end the pinfall wasn’t obvious at first. Not the best way to start the show. *

Squared Circle Wrestling Showcase
Brent Banks, Alex Vega & Scotty O’Shea vs. Marcus Marquez, Josh Alexander & Sebastian Suave

O’Shea and Alexander start off. O’Shea grabs a leg but Alexander kicks him in the face. O’Shea kicks Alexander in the dome and the side of his face. O’Shea hits a back springboard elbow for two. Alexander pitches O’Shea to the floor. This brings in Vega who sends Alexander out with a headscissors. Marquez boots Vega in the corner. Vega huracanrana’s him for two. Vega quesadora armdrags Marquez to the corner. Marquez forearms Vega to the floor. Banks crossbody’s Marquez for two. He sends him out with a dropkick. Banks rolls Suave into a prawn hold for two. Banks takes him down with a toreador. Suvae boots and chops Banks in the corner. Banks kicks Suave into the ropes and small packages him for two. Banks dropsaults Suave. Alexander sends Banks to the floor. O’Shea takes Alexander and Suave over simultaneously with one huracanrana. Marquez clotheslines O’Shea to cut off his dive attempt. Alexander’s team isolates O’Shea in their corner. O’Shea escapes by stomping Marquez. Vega tags in and splashes Suave. Suave catches Vega with a triangle choke in the ropes. Alexander hip tosses Banks. Banks lands on the ropes and is able to armdrag Alexander to the corner. Vega back elbows Alexander for two. Alexander wheelbarrows him into a German suplex. Vega breaks the pin and sends Alexander to the floor. Suave accidentally helps Vega headscissor Marquez to the floor. Banks skytwister presses onto Marquez and Suave on the floor. O’Shea hits a cannonball senton on Alexander for the pin at 8:56. I liked a lot of what I saw in this match, but there was too much to digest in a short amount of time. I think if they had let some of their bigger moves sink in it would have been a more well rounded contest. For what it was though, it was a fun nine minute sprint. **1/2

Fire Ant vs. Brodie Lee

Eddie Kingston is on commentary, scouting Lee for their Grand Championship bout tomorrow night. Fire Ant ducks Lee’s pre-bell big boot. The momentum sends Lee to the floor. Lee catches Fire Ant’s first dive and throws him back in the ring. Fire Ant however is able to land a suicide dive and a tope con hilo. Fire Ant celebrates with the crowd too much allowing Lee to hit a big boot with ease. Lee throws Fire Ant into the wall of the hockey arena that this show is taking place in. Back in the ring, Lee hits a slingshot senton for two. Lee splashes Fire Ant in the corner and walks over him. Lee gets two with a nice looking dropkick. Lee forearms Fire Ant in his lower back. Lee puts on a cloverleaf after chopping Fire Ant to the mat. Lee picks him up in the hold an powerbombs him. Lee pump-handle suplexes Fire Ant. Fire Ant side steps a charge in the corner. Lee turns Fire Ant’s monkey flip attempt into a vertical suplex for two. Fire Ant Burns Down the House to block a powerbomb. A high crossbody and the Yahtzee kick lead to Fire Ant thinking he could suplex Lee. He doesn’t, but does light up Lee with various kicks. Lee pops Fire Ant into a German suplex, Ryo Saito style. That’s only worth a two count. Fire Ant prawn holds Lee for two. Lee nails the big boot and a Liger Bomb for the pin at 7:01. I will never tire of Brodie Lee mowing through guys. Fire Ant is also a mad man when it comes to selling and taking a beating, so this was all types of fun. Kingston applauds Lee from the commentary booth. **3/4

Dasher Hatfield has not forgotten about Archibald Peck’s cheating ways back at “Chikarasaurus Rex: King of Sequel, Night 2.” Hatfield is angry at Veronica for being the one hitting him with her baton. Hatfield says he will get his revenge tonight in Canada.

Dasher Hatfield vs. Archibald Peck

Veronica is nowhere to be seen at the moment. Mr. Touchdown is of course in Hatfield’s corner. Peck’s attempt as wrestling is half-hearted because he is preoccupied with checking the entrance in the hopes Veronica will show up. Hatfield wants to offer him a hug to cheer him up which Peck is apprehensive about. Instead, Peck grabs a waistlock. Hatfield turns that into a wristlock. An exchange ends with Hatfield finally getting his hug in. Hatfield wants a second one, but Peck drop toe holds him into the second turnbuckle. Peck drives his elbow into the back of Hatfield’s head. Peck gleefully stomps Hatfield down in the corner. Peck hits a flipping DDT and a falling headbutt. Peck double underhook suplexes Hatfield. Since the crowd wants to see a hug so badly, Peck goes for a Bear Hug. Hatfield escapes with ease and gives Peck an atomic drop. Hatfield back elbows and trips Peck after a backdrop for two. Peck boots Hatfield to block a corner attack. Peck hits a Bret Hart-esque elbow off the second rope. Just as Peck sets up for the Cranial Crescendo, Veronica shows up. Peck hops off the top and lands on his leg. Hatfield notices and dropkicks his leg out. Peck enzuigiri’s Hatfield. He begs Veronica for forgiveness. Hatfield leg sweeps him into a leg-lock submission. Hatfield contorts Peck’s leg so that he is giving himself a wedgie. Peck reaches the ropes to break his own hold. You read all of that right. Peck begs for forgiveness some more. Hatfield runs the bases and hits a dropkick. Hatfield gets two with a Jackhammer. Peck catches Hatfield on the top rope and suplexes him off. Veronica locks eyes with Mr. Touchdown and is instantly smitten, just like in Long Island. Peck notices and becomes angry. Hatfield schoolyard trips Peck into the Duke Snyder Special (Hatfield’s fancy leg submission). Peck taps out at 12:05, causing Veronica to stomp to the back right away. Speaking of things I never tire of, Archibald Peck…what a guy. He is so wildly entertaining while also being great in the ring. He and Hatfield had an excellent match that also played up the Veronica/Peck/Touchdown storyline perfectly. This really was just the perfect blending of everything into one entertaining package. ***

The Spectral Envoy (UltraMantis Black & Hallowicked) vs. The Colony (Soldier Ant & Green Ant) vs. The Batiri (Obariyon & Kodama) vs. Los Ice Creams (El Hijo del Ice Cream & Ice Cream Jr.)

Every other team is in the ring when Los Ice Creams are about to make their entrance. Their music hits and nobody comes out. That is, until GEKIDO members combatANT and deviANT make their way out to take Los Ice Creams’ place in the match.

The Spectral Envoy (UltraMantis Black & Hallowicked) vs. The Colony (Soldier Ant & Green Ant) vs. The Batiri (Obariyon & Kodama) vs. GEKIDO (combatANT & deviANT)

Of course, the GEKIDO go right after the Colony while the Batiri battle with the Envoy. It’s complete chaos at the beginning of the match. The GEKIDO guys try to unmask the Colony members on the floor while the other teams battle by the entrance. Soldier Ant dumps combatANT head first onto the ring apron which looks quite brutal. Hallowicked pops Kodama into the hockey boards, which also looks quite painful. combatANT and Soldier Ant end up back in the ring. Bryce admonishes combatANT for going after the mask. Soldier Ant clotheslines combatANT to the floor. deviANT comes in with a flying knee strike. Green Ant gives deviANT a Michinoku Driver for two. The other GEKDIO ant, assailANT is now also ringside. Green Ant dives onto Soldier Ant, deviANT and combatANT on the floor. Obariyon and Kodama put on a tandem sleeper hold to try and take out Hallowicked. Mantis saves the day. Mantis gives Obariyon Cosmic Doom for two. assailANT is getting in shots on the Colony while Bryce is busy with the Envoy and Batiri in the ring. Mantis helps out Hallowicked with the Go 2 Sleepy Hollow but only gets a two count. Suddenly, we hear Delirious’ voice coming over the PA with threats to Mantis. As Mantis is distracted, The Batiri give Hallowicked the Scramble Brains (their knee strike to the gut/knee to the head combo) for the pin at 8:10.

GEKIDO and The Batiri team up on The Colony. That is until combatANT and deviANT turn their attack to Kodama. Green Ant DDT’s Obariyon and hooks on the CHIKARA Special: Green. Obariyon taps out at 11:10. combatANT goes after Soldier Ant’s mask after he an deviANT dispose Green Ant to the floor. Green Ant helps Soldier Ant out, only to be isolated in the GEKIDO corner. They of course go for Green Ant’s mask too. Green Ant antzuigiri’s combatANT and kicks deviANT away. Soldier Ant nails combatANT with a few forearms. The Colony hit combatANT with a double dropkick in the corner. AssailANT pulls deviANT out of the ring so he can avoid it. Green Ant ends up suicide diving onto both of them anyways. Soldier Ant goes for the TKO on combatANT. combatANT slides out and spins Soldier Ant’s mask so he cannot see. This allows combatANT to hit his own TKO and pin Soldier Ant at 14:12. That was pretty wild match overall, and a really fun brawl to watch. I’m very intrigued to see where the GEKIDO is going to go and just if The Colony will be unmasked in the end. The other teams were kind of just there, but definitely added to the fracas where possible. ***

Tim Donst says he didn’t cross the border to lose a match, but rather to prove something. He’s still upset that Hallowicked stole his Young Lions Cup, but he’s still going to prove that he’s the best Young Lions Cup champion ever regardless of that. He plans to kill El Generico because he has diplomatic immunity and because he should be facing Hallowicked instead of him. He ends the promo by demanding Wink give him his match with Hallowicked.

El Generico vs. Tim Donst

Generico breaks a lock-up cleanly in the corner. Donst does the same. Donst tries a cheap shot to break another lock-up. Generico ducks and delivers a couple of chops instead. Generico hops over Donst and nails a leg lariat for one. Generico delivers ten punches in the corner. Generico’s standing moonsault gets him a two count. Donst rolls to the floor to create some distance. Donst trips Generico when he goes for a dive. Donst drives him back first into the ring post and the ring apron. Donst rolls him back in the ring for two. Donst chokes Generico on the middle rope. He suplexes Generico out of the corner. Generico grabs a waistlock. Donst backs Generico to the corner and mocks Hallowicked by giving Generico a super snapmare. Generico bridges the top rope to send Donst to the floor. Generico tope con hilo’s out after him. Generico lands a big crossbody back in the ring for two. Donst elbows Generico to block a Blue Thunder Driver. Generico is able to successfully hit it anyhow for two. Donst blocks the yakuza kick. He drops Generico with an STO for two. Generico runs up the ropes looking for a tornado DDT. Donst blocks the DDT and counters with a Death Valley Driver for two. Donst gets upset with referee Derek Morningstar. Generico tries a yakuza kick but gets crotched on the ropes. Donst German suplexes him free. Donst runs at Generico, but Generico suplexes him into the corner. Both men take some time to recover. An exchange of forearms leads to a couple kicks by Generico. Generico finally wins the exchange with a Dragon suplex. Generico again misses the yakuza kick. Donst tries to choke Generico with his wrist tape. Morningstar catches him. While he’s disposing of the tape, Donst applies a shoelace assisted chokehold. Generico passes out at 12:15. This fell a bit short of their AIW encounter, but was certainly still a good match. It is El Generico after all. I say it all the time, but it bears repeating: Donst has all the tools to be CHIKARA’s top Rudo and I hope that’s the direction he’s heading in. **3/4

Mike Quackenbush & Jigsaw vs. GEKIDO (17 & The Shard)

Quackenbush and Jigsaw head out to the ring very quickly. Quackenbush says GEKIDO’s fairytale ends tonight and asks for them to come out. The Shard and 17 attack from the crowd, with Shard going right after Jigsaw’s historically bad knee. Quackenbush and Jigsaw give Shard a few kicks after sending 17 to the floor. Jigsaw goes for a brainbuster on Shard, but 17 chop blocks him to stop. Jigsaw suplexes 17. Quackenbush slingshot sentons onto him, and Jigsaw slingshot double stomps him. Shard chop blocks Jigsaw again. 17 shoves Quackenbush back first into the ring frame. 17 and Shard pick apart Jigsaw’s knee something fierce while Quackenbush anxiously awaits his tag. Jigsaw is able to get that tag by German suplexing 17 and Quackenbush pulling Jigsaw closer. Quackenbush back elbows 17 twice and delivers a low dropkick. The Black Tornado Slam gets him a two count. Quackenbush gets two again with a top rope senton, thanks to The Shard jumping in. Shard put Quackenbush on his shoulders. Jigsaw kicks Shard to free his partner. Shard superkicks Jigsaw and sets up for the Jig N’ Tonic. Quackenbush superkicks Shard, sunset flipping him to give Jigsaw a two count. 17 palm strikes Jigsaw. 17 hits the Quackendriver II on Quackenbush. He twists up Quackenbush’s wrist and arm. 17 snaps Quackenbush’s arm so fiercely that Quackenbush quits right away, ending the match at 7:27. Jigsaw sends 17 and The Shard packing. This was a sure fire way to make sure they come in with a bang; put the guy who represents CHIKARA on the shelf. The match itself was pretty basic stuff, but the story is the reason the match existed so I’m okay with it. The doppelganger route is an interesting on to take. You have my attention, CHIKARA. **1/2

Eddie Kingston vs. Ophidian

Ophidian goes for the Death Grip right away. Kingston is able to fight it off. Ophidian enzuigiri’s Kingston from the apron and delivers double knees off the top rope for two. Kingston chops Ophidian up in the corner. Kingston gets two with a Northern Lights suplex. Ophidian thrusts Kingston in the throat. He claws Kingston’s throat and brings him to the mat. Ophidian chokes him on the middle rope. Kingston gives Ophidian a hard overhand chop. Ophidian backs Kingston to the corner and chokes him with his boot. Ophidian dragon kicks Kingston, leading to another overhand chop from Kingston. Kingston picks up Ophidian and gives him an Electric Chair slam. Kingston fires up as Ophidian kicks him in the chest. Ophidian chokes Kingston again. Kingston catches Ophidian’s Thesz Press attempt and Uranage suplexes him. Kingston yakuza kicks Ophidian and Saito suplexes him for two. Ophidian ducks the Backfist. He takes Kingston down with a trapezius hold. Ophidian hits a leaping enzuigiri then drives his knees into Kingston’s chest in the corner. Ophidian applies a choke hold with no avail. A Backfist to the Future later and Kingston picks up the pin at 7:34. That was far more of a showcase of Ophidian’s new throat/”snake” based offense than I expected. I think it does a lot for Ophidian to take down the Grand Champion in the manner he did. I’m becoming more optimistic about the new Ophidian the more I see of him. **3/4

Scott “Jagged” Parker can’t believe the day of their second Campeonatos de Parejas shot is finally here. Jagged tells Matthews that while they have done so many things together in their personal and professional lives, they have never been the best. While Jagged likes being the guys who go out and have fun, they have been striving for more. Ever since they came close in Baltimore back in September 2010, they have been looking for the opportunity to come again. Matthews says tonight means everything to him. He tells the fans of Ontario to get ready to feel the flow of 3.0.

Campeonatos de Parejas
F.I.S.T. (Chuck Taylor & Icarus) (Campeones) vs. 3.0. (Scott “Jagged” Parker & Shane Matthews)

Once again, Icarus is filling in for the injured Johnny Gargano. History is in 3.0.’s favor, since they won the last time these two teams met. Matthews breaks a lock up in the corner. Matthews shoulder blocks Taylor and goes for the Boston Crab. Taylor gets the ropes. Icarus runs in and the same thing happens to him. Jagged tags in. The fans recoil as Icarus takes off his jacket. Even Bryce Remsburg begs him to keep it on but to no avail. Jagged elbow drops his jacket for good measure. Icarus wants a test of strength. Jagged wins it, then armdrags Icarus. Icarus is very upset about it. Jagged breaks his waistlock and grabs a side headlock. Icarus celebrates escaping for a moment then is taken to the mat in a headlock. Jagged grabs Icarus’ mustache to add insult to injury. Icarus pokes him in the eyes. Jagged shoves him to the floor and backdrops Taylor. Matthews trips Taylor and Jagged elbow drops him off Matthews’ back. Icarus suffers the same fate. Taylor knees Jagged in the back from the apron. He turns into a spear from Icarus. F.I.S.T. team up on Jagged in the corner, even using a shoe illegally when able. Jagged manages to flapjack Taylor and tag in Matthews eventually. Behind Bryce’s back, Icarus tosses powder into Matthews’ eyes to pick up a cheap pin at 10:48. The second fall is quite short, as Jagged rolls up and pins Taylor at 10:54. Jagged leg lariats Taylor to start the third fall. Jagged elbows Icarus and clotheslines Taylor. Matthews headscissors Icarus to the floor. He sends Taylor to the corner with a headscissors too. Matthews takes over both F.I.S.T. members with a tandem headscissors. Jagged knees Icarus after Matthews gives him a backbreaker. 3.0. hit the Hart Attack on Taylor. Icarus throws Matthews to the floor and chokes Jagged in the corner. Matthews saves Jagged and 3.0. hit the Doomsday Device. Taylor breaks the pin. Taylor superkicks Matthews and gives Jagged the Sole Food. Jagged tags Taylor with a rolling elbow. Icarus delivers the Blu-Ray to Jagged for two. Icarus gets two with the Wings of Icarus also. Taylor knees Matthews in the corner. He boots Matthews into a back cracker from Icarus for two. Icarus pulls a chain out of his boot while Bryce is pre-occupied with Matthews and Taylor. Icarus clobbers Matthews with the chain, yet somehow Matthews is able to kick out at two! Icarus grabs one of the title belts. Matthews ducks the belt shot and puts Icarus in the Boston Crab. Icarus taps out at 15:04, giving us NEW Campeones de Parejas! I was surprised by how much of the usual 3.0. and F.I.S.T. shtick we saw early on in the match, but I think it works because that’s exactly what brought 3.0. to the dance in the first place. I like how all of the cheap tactics F.I.S.T. used in their other defenses ended up backfiring in their final match at Campeones. It’s a shame that the crowd wasn’t as vocal during the match as I had hoped, because it would have made their hometown win that much more special. Still, the post match celebration is quite the spectacle and you truly get the feeling that this title change meant a lot to Parker and Matthews personally. ***1/4

The 411: Much like Dan Barry, this show was remarkably average. Some of the storylines got fleshed out and there was some good wrestling, but the lackluster atmosphere the crowd created didn't help any of the matches that real could have used it. While 3.0. winning the titles in their homeland was a really nice moment it could have been executed a bit better. The good news is that I am still interested in all the storylines, and this helped advance some of those, but not enough for the show to totally stand on its own two legs. If you're a huge 3.0. fan then I definitely think you should pick this up. Otherwise you might be better off looking around for a different show. You can buy this show on DVD or On Demand at Smart Mark Video. The DVD is also available through CHIKARA's Store.Be sure to check out all of my CHIKARA reviews at my CHIKARA blog; "The CHIKARA Special" and all the CHIKARA news over at

Final Score:  6.8   [ Average ]