wrestling / TV Reports
Acero’s AEW Dynamite Review 8.23.23
Image Credit: AEW
Loading...I’m at the office today, about 85% done with edits for the next book, but it’s time for some wrestling! Let’s goooo!!
It’s Wednesday, you know what that means…
Rest In Peace Terry Funk, ya wild son of a bitch. You gave us more of you than any of us ever deserved.
We start with The Young Bucks and Kenny Omega coming out first, followed by their opponents The Gunns and Juice Robinson.
The Bucks meet them at the for an attack, but with the addition of Jay White, the numbers game takes over. Juice grabs a chair and runs into the ring to attack The Bucks, but Rick Knox takes the chair out of his hands. Juice with a right hand to Knox!!!! KNOX IS OUT!
In come The Young Bucks. SUPERKICKS TO JUICE! In come The Gunns. 3:10 to Yuma to Nick Jackson! Superkick from Mat to both men! Jay White in, hits a Uranage on Matt! Jay lifts up for Blade Runner, but Omega runs in, Jay drops Matt, tries to for a Blade Runner to Omega, Omega double underhooks, in comes Colten. SNAP DRAGON TO COLTEN!!! Here is Austin, and he gets a Snap Dragon too! Jay White comes in now, chops Kenny a few times. V-Trigger FROM OMEGA!
Omega hits the ropes for another V-Trigger, but Konosuke Takeshita is here for a huge surprise lariat! The Bucks are outnumbered outside of the ring with The Gunns taking care of Nick while Juice and Jay choke Matt out with a wire.
HERE COME FTR!!!!
They attempt to even the odds, fighting up the ramp, while Kenny and Takeshita are in the middle of the ring. Takeshita lifts Omega, hits some huge elbow strikes, spins for a third, but Omega hits a knee!!! Omega lifts Takeshita! Tries for One-Winged Angel, but Takeshita slips off and runs out of the ring!
The Elite vs The Gunns and Juice Robinson (w/ Jay White)
Winner:
Total Rating:
Match Time:
Renee is backstage for a sitdown with MJF. She brings up the 80k for All In. MJF says this means he’s going to be real chubbed up. Lol. He calls himself the 2023 version of The British Bulldog with good teeth and good English. He tells the London blokes to cheer for him like he’s the second coming of Winston Churchill. He says if they do, he’ll buy them a pint. Renee questions this, and he says he’ll make Khan pay for it. He asks to edit this out.
As for the opening match for the ROH Tag Team Titles, how much pressure is he feeling? MJF says the most he’s ever been in his entire life. This is the biggest event in the history of pro-wrestling. None of this happens without him, the fans, but also the people who paved the road for him prior. Think of everyone before him. Hogan, Sammartino, The Rock, SCSA, Triple H, Undertaker. He is standing on the shoulder of giants, and if he wins Sunday, he may become a giant himself. It’s a pressure he is ready for.
Renee brings up the friendship and its authenticity.
We get a video package of how it started on 6/14 and the following weeks were both he and Cole had opportunities to sneak attack and not really follow thru.
MJF’s reaction is that this is all really new for him. He’s never had a genuine friend before. He’s not being funny or trying to work us – it’s real. Adam has made him a better person in a really short period of time. Taught him he can trust and let his guard down. Adam is not just his friend, he’s his brother. Brothers fight, push each other, and are competitive, but they always hug it out. He understands why we don’t trust him. He is far from perfect. Think about the worst t hing we’ve ever done in out life, he’s probably done this twice. He has been vulnerable for the first time ever, so please be vulnerable with him, and he promises we will be rewarded. He is not just a scumbag, he is our scumbag.
Renee calls this weekened monumental. Good luck.
MJF cant wait to do it with his best friend.
Rey Fenix vs Jon Moxley
Rey tries to corner Jon but cant quite get it. Jon hits a right, a knee. Rey chops the chest. Another chop. Jon fires back. He sends Rey to the ropes, Rey flies back with a tail whip, but Jon ducks under, tries for a lariat, Rey hits the ropes, flies back, gets caught, escapes, hits a dropkick, sending Jon into the ropes then outside. Rey hits the ropes. SUICIDE DIVE!!!! He went headfirst there. Rey hits the ropes and HITS ANOTHER ONE DEAD CENTER!!!! Jon grabs him from behind and locks in a choke hold. He then tries to rip the mask off of Rey. The ref stops him and sends him into the ring, but Jon, instead, stomps Rey down face first.
Jon enters the ring, and the ref admonishes him. Rey sits up, dazed and with a ripped mask. He reaches under the ring, but here comes Jon to kick Rey in the face. Jon sends Rey into the barricade. Jon drags Rey around the ring and sends him into another barricade. Oh shit, commentary is ringside.
Jon sends Rey into the ring. Jon enters, hits the ropes, kick to the face. Rey with some chops! Jon kicks. High knee. Whip and Rey kicks the back of the head. Rey ot the top rope, he runs in, kicks, but Jon side steps and hits a lariat in the corner. Rey follows with an elbow, ducks under a running Jon, hits the ropes, ducks under, rebounds, and a HUGE LARIAT TO REY! Cover for 1..2…NO!!!
We are back in time for Jon to hit a huge piledriver to Rey! Jon covers for 1..2…NO!!! Jon grabs Rey by the arms and looks to stomp his head in. He gets a few strong stomps to the face but REY KIPS UP! SUPERKICK! Both men down! Ref starts the count. Jon up at 4. Rey up next, he’s in the corner, Jon attacks, but Rey hops up, spins and kicks. He goes for a cutter, but Jon locks in a s leeper! He drops down, but Rey flips out of the hold and stomps Jon’s chest in! CUTTER!!!! Fuck. Yes. COVER! 1..2…NO!!!! Rey does some rope work, spins out of the ropes, big kick to Jon! To the top rope! He dives! Frog Splash! Cover! 1..2……NO!!!!! Rey with some headbutts. He gets a fireman’s, but Jon locks the arm and drives some hard elbows into the head over and over and over till Rey falls to his ass. Jon grabs the head, locks it, double underhook, CRADLE FROM REY!!!!! 1..2..NO!!! Forearm from Jon, Rey kicks, again, dives for another cutter, but Rey hits an elbow instead! Both men down again! Jon stirs. He’s rolls onto his stomach. Jon pushes himself up at 6. REY POPS UP TOO! Chop from Rey! Punch from Jon! Back and forth for some boos and cheers. They’re standing now. Chop to chop. Jon with a forearm chop combo. Elbows in the corner. Rey shoves Jon, big kick to the chin! Rey to the top rope! Jon is fully up! Right to Rey! He climbs! Rakes the back! Jon locks the head, Rey fights with some rights! He locks the head under his legs. RE DOUBLE UNDERHOOKS! Jon stands! He bites the face of Rey! Jon locks the head. He double underhooks! DEATH RIDER OFF THE TOP ROPE!!!! 1……..2…..NO!!!!!
Jon is pissed!!! He locks in a sleeper! Leg scissors, too! Rey has his hand in the air, he says NO! Rey pulls himself into a seated position, Jon rolls Rey is fading! The match is over!
Winner: Jon Moxley
I fucking love Rey Fenix, holy shit. This match was mainly because Rey has some Visa issues, but knowing that means they didn’t really need to do much and yet here we are. One thing Rey never does is slouch, and this was some fast-paced bad assery.
Total Rating: ****
Match Time: 13:35
Here comes Claudio Castagnoli and Wheeler Yuta!!! They each have crowbars! They go to attack Rey!
Here comes Penta and Eddie Kingston!
But Ortiz is in front of them with a sock full of something!
Penta and Eddie are confused until…
Santana makes his return!!!! He attacks Penta! Ortiz attacks Kingston!
The Best Friends are here! They rush the ring as BCC makes their escape! They stand outside of the ring as docs check on Rey Fenix. He has been crcked on the side of the head with a crowbar, says commentary. Rey is going to get the stretcher job as BCC and crew leave through the crowd.
Kingston and his team watch as Rey is tended to and commentary switches gear.
We are back and Rey is getting placed into an ambulance with the help of Penta. Penta is going with him, along with Alex.
Eddie is waiting outside the ambulance, bewildered. He tells the camera man to get out of his face.
Renee runs up on Eddie, Eddie is pissed. See what her husband did? Get the mic out of his face? It’s ok, he’ll fix it at Wembley.
Renee, Earlier Today, spoke to Sammy Guevara. Why did he help Jericho?
Here comes Matt Menard, Angelo Parker, and Daniel Garcia.
What was Sammy thinking? He accepted Don’s offer. Why be there? Sammy says Jericho is blinded by friendship. Jericho has been there since day one.
Parker tells Sammy that he’s doing the same thing, being blinded by friendship. He’s always been there for Jericho, but has Jericho always been there for Sammy? Think about it.
Parker and Menard walk away, leaving Garcia to stare at Sammy for a bit longer, then leaves.
Up Next, the contract signing for Will Ospreay and Chris Jericho.
Schiavone is in the ring, and he introduces Will Ospreay who comes out with Callis.
Tony apologizes for not mentioning Callis.
Chris Jericho is out next. He is with Sammy Guevara.
Tony brings up the extra security due to how volatile this situation has become. Will is first. He is handed a pen, while Don is handed a mic.
Everyone wants to know why he did what he did last week. It’s simple; four words – Will By God Ospreay. He realized the only thing better for Don than having Jericho in the family was if he could play a part in ending the career of the greatest of all time.
STFU chant.
Don made an offer to Will that no one else could; Jericho’s head on a platter at Wembley. He threw away 34 years of friendship. He chose money and power, writing history rather than watching it, and chose Will over Jericho. It occurs to Don that a few years ago, Jericho nearly died in England. Well, this Sunday, Don will be there to make sure that that job gets done once and for all. May God guide his hand.
Will tells the crowd to shut up and let him talk, yeah. Is Jericho taking this seriously, or is this some kind of vanity project for his band? Does he understand what Wembley Stadium is? It’s the biggest venue in the UK. This match will change his life, bruv. He’s got a misses at home, a four year old step son, and the day before he wrestles Jericho, he’s doing an Indy. He’s trying to get as much money together to put his kid through school. This match will change his life. After this, after he beats him, he will be the only man to say he beat Omega, Okada, and Jericho in two months. This goes very well in six monts time, because his NJPW contract will be up.
He knows he is the best in the world. He is better than The Elite, Danielson, Punk, and better than Jericho. All his lineage, legacy, he respects it, but all it is is rocket fuel for him and his future.
Jericho wants to talk to Will about his present. Will may not have accomplished those things if it wasn’t for Jericho. Five years ago, when the entire wrestling world were all predicting Ospreay would be in a wheelchair before thirty, Jericho called him got his number, and told him to turn it down. He’d never last as long as Jericho, and he’d never be a top star. Here were are, Wembley, Jericho v Ospreay. He didn’t have to attack from behind. This match was supposed to happen in 2021. This is Wembley, the biggest show in pro-wrestling history, which means the biggest show of his career. Don’t tell him this is vanity. This is bigger than any Wrestlemania, Tokyo Dome, anything! This match means more to him than anyone else. Will is coming from the bottom, Jericho is coming from the top of the mountain, with every hater and internet dipshit trying to predict his demise. He must be the best Jericho to beat Will, but Will must be the best he’s ever been to beat Jericho.
So prove it to Jericho, to his family in the front, in front of 80k of his countrymen that he can beat Jericho, and don’t make him regret the fact that he picked up the phone five years ago and kept him from being in a wheelchair.
Will has heard enough. He slaps the mic out of his hand. Jericho slaps Will. Security holds both men back. Will flips a table.
Damn, Will. That was great and unexpected.
Back to Renee having a sitdown with Adam Cole!
Se brings up his relationship with MJF and has some highlights. The video package shows some of their glorious moments. What does this mean to Cole?
Cole calls it bizarre, that they get along and are best friends. They’ve had a ton of fun together, but he also helped Cole find himself. When he first came back, his confidence was low, but MJF reminded Cole who the real Adam Cole is.
Renee asks about the title, and Cole walking out with gold. What would it mean to be champion?
Cole says when he got into pro-wrestling, he got into it to be the best. Th AEW Title makes him the best on the planet. He doesn’t want to win it, he needs to, and he will.
Renee brings up Roderick Strong and The Kingdom. We get another video package of Cole disparaging MJF, saying he’s just playing along. Then in July when he sares the title down. The live Cole looks a little embarrassed. We see two weeks ago where Cole almost pounced, then last Wednesday where Cole stared at the title while hugging MJF.
Cole laughs sarcastically, then says he is done. He doesn’t understand how people find it so hard to process that people can be friends. Cole stands, pissed, stares at the cam, and says there are no issues with him and Max. NONE!
Tornado Tag Team Match
Darby Allin and Nick Wayne vs Swerve Strickland and AR Fox
AR and Nick go at it in the ring while Darby and Swerve fight on the outside. Nick to the top rope, AR is there to clip the leg, then runs up for a hard split-legged German off the top! Gah DamN! AR removes his shirt and he’s wearing the bloodied tank top. Swerve pulls Nick out of the ring, and holds both him and Darby. AR with an Implosion Senton to both men! AR tosses the bloodied tank top at Nick Wayne’s mom in the crowd. Swerve kicks nick in the face while AR sends Darby in the ring. Swerve with a back suplex to Nick onto the apron.
All four men on the apron, Ar and Swerve look to suplex, but Darby knocks Swerve off the apron, Nick knocks off AR. Double Wayne’s World off the top rope! Swerve with a coffin drop! HE sends AR into the ring and covers for 1..2…NO!!!
We are back and Nick is bloodied. AR holds his head in front of Nick’s mom, saying he’s going to do it all over again. AR sends Nick back over the barricade. Swerve with a suplex to Nick. Swerve sends Darby into the ring, AR sends in Nick. Chop in the corner from Swerve. AR and Swerve roll through with their respective men, AR hits a dropkick ,Swerve drops nick. Nick to the top rope, flies off trying for a Cutter, but Swerve grabs him and sends him backwards into a neckbreaker from AR! Cover for 1..2.NO!!! Darby stops the pin. Stunner to AR!!! SUICIDE DIVE TO SWERVE! GAHDD DAMN!!! Darby Sends swerve into the barricade and grabs a chair. Darby pulls Swerve towards the chair, sits him down in it. Darby with a right. He turns….AR WITH A FUCKING MOONSAULT!!! He sits Darby onto the chair, Swerve to the apron. He runs with a stomp to Darby!
Wayne is left alone with a bloodied nose in the ring. Swerve and AR enter slowly. Nick looks to run, AR kicks, Wayne blocks, Swerve kicks and connects. AR with a corkscrew brainbuster. Cover for 1…2…….NO!!! Another suplex attempt. Cover for 1..2.NO!!! Swerve with a kick to the side of the head. Cover for ..2…..NO!!!! AR and Swerve are pissed. They lift him, whip to the corner, both run with a boot to the face.
AR to the top rope. 450 Splash! WANYE MOVES!!!!! Swerve is gloating. Wayne stacks AR! 1…Swerve notices and tries to stop, but Darby….2…..holds the boot and Wayne gets the 3!!!!!
Winners: Darby Allin and Nick Wayne
Fun enough match. Coulda done without the lovefest for AR from Darby, but if it gets us smarmy Christian….
Total Rating: **1/2
Match Time: 9:55
Swerve Strickland grabs a mic. He laughs maniacally, calls this disappointing….
But he means Fox. Why is it every time AR a chance, he blows it. He tried. Why is Fox such a loser? Why? Swerve says this was a test. AR cant beat an 18 year old child?
Fox asks him to do this off the mic, they can talk later.
Swerve cant trust him. Not here and not at Wembley. He tells Nana to handle his light work.
Prince Nana tells AR Fox he is fired.
Here is BRIAN CAGE! Huge clothesline! Drill Claw!
DARBY, NICK, AND STING ARE BACK!!!!
They enter the ring as Swerve leaves.
Darby grabs the mic, tells AR he wouldn’t be where he was if it wasn’t for Fox. Take his hand. Darby lifts AR. Darby tells him he loves AR Fox. They hug.
As for Swerve, he’s dumber than he thought. What is he going to do? Who does Swerve got?
Prince Nana laughs, and Swerve smiles.
It’s Christian Cage!
Cage tells us not to be surprised. The true greats are always two steps ahead. He wants to be introduced to this new kid. Nick Wayne. Nice to meet you in person, says Christian. He heard his story, and understands that Nick has a father…and he’s dead.
Lol. Fucking Christian.
He also understands that Wayne was a pro-wrestler, but he’s never heard of Buddy Wayne, so he must not be good. Good news, though, this means Nick doesn’t have a lot to live up to. If he was Nick, he’d steer clear of Wembley stadium, because he’d hate for him to have déjà vu and watch that coffin door close on someone he loves for the second time in his life. If Nick plays his cards right, Cage will be there to mentor you when it’s all over, because every fatherless child needs a good mentor.
The Young Bucks and FTR are sitting with Renee. FTR v Bucks III. Let’s get into it. FTR has been helping two weeks in a row.
The Bucks thank them, Cash says they are not pals or buddies, but they need to know who is better, no excuses.
Renee says they are 1 and 1. In front of 80k, does this feel like the biggest match of their career?
Matt says their first big stadium, show was 1/8th of that. Nick says they are made men, they don’t need to win this match. FTR need to beat them in order to cement their legacy.
Cash doesn’t even wanna give that statement credit. This is the biggest match in history, and there is a lot here. Dax calls this personal.
Renee asks Matt what this is about. The best tag team or the titles? Dax says the titles, but it goes far beyond that, too. Legacy, the only tag team that stands in their way is The Bucks. He doesn’t wanna wake up Monday and tell his family he lost.
Matt wants to remind them that they feed their daughters because The Bucks brought them here. They are the reason FTR is here. Wanna talk about Legacy? Here’s the truth. One day, when this is all said and done, when they retire, people will say The Young Bucks, lets finally give them their flowers. They are the best team that has ever competed. What they’ll say about FTR? Those aare the guys that The Young Bucks named on their YouTube show.
Cash says they hopped on their name and insult them? They are not on FTRs level. 80k people. They are the foundation now, and they will crack The Bucks’ foundation.
Not the best back and forth, but got the job done.
Ruby Soho vs Skye Blue
Skye starts by tripping up Ruby on the apron, beautifully, but her upperhand is short lived as Ruby brings her into the ring nd sends her int othe corner. A knee to the back to the cout of four. Ruby sends Skye into the corner. Skye tries to fight out, a big chop to Ruby. Right hands to Ruby. Skye fights out of the corne. Ruby rakes the eyes! Back elbow from Ruby, she locks the head, but Skye sends her to the apron, high kick, running knee to Ruby! Skye to the apron, hops over the right, kicks Ruby, then hits a crossbody off the apron!
We are back and Skye is goin wild. Skye rushes the corner, Ruby sends her to the apron, right elbow from Skye, she dives with ANOTHER CROSSBODY! Cover for 1..2.NO!! Skye locks up from behind, Ruby reverses, tries for a Saito, but Skye drops down. Ruby hits the ropes, Skye grabs the arm. NECKBREAKER! COVER! 1…2.NO!!! Ruby rolls her into a crucifix, they trade some pins, back and forth a bit, Skye tries to kick, drops down, tries to kick again, Skye hits another kick, Sky Fall to Ruby! Cover for 1..2..NO!!!
Skye tries to kick, but Ruby hits a knee atrike. Skye hits a kick, too!!! Backsldie from Sky!!! No Future from Ruby! Ruby with Destination Unknown! Cover for 1..2….3!!!
Winner: Ruby Soho
Skye is only getting better, which is great. Soon she’ll be good. As it stands, she could use quite a bit of work, but you gotta give her mad props for how much she’s growing.
Total Rating: **
Match Time: 7:25
Renee is backstage, and she is with The Kingdom and Roderick Strong. She asks him what does he know that we don’t.
Strong says at the end of Sunday night, we’re going to find out who the real MJF is and who the real Adam Cole is.
We get a video package from The House of Black, talking about funerals and the burial of Billy Gunn.
The Acclaimed come out without entrance music. Bowens wants a mic.
No more mind games, no more fun time, they’re still standing and they want House of Black now. Lights out, let’s fight.
The lights go out.
The House of Black is here to circle the ring. They attack The Acclaimed as Julia Hart watches. They make short work of The Acclaimed, and we see Brody with a chain wrapped around his hand.
The Acclaimed’s music hits.
It’s Daddy Ass!
He rolls into the ring, and The House of Black leave the ring.
Billy with the mic. He says they’ve got his attention. A few weeks ago, after they beat him for the second time, he sat down, unlaced his boots, and did the two hardest things he ever had to do. One) walk out on Max and Anthony. Two) Leave behind a really good career. He was ok with it, but then last week, they jumped The Acclaimed, busted Max open, hurt one of his kids. That wasn’t good enough. They took his boots and destroyed them. Tried to tear down a 32 year old legacy. He’s done stuff in this business that will go down in wrestling history. He is a hall of famer, and they just pissed all over it. So for that, one more time, it’s all or nothing, ALL IN in front of 80k. He takes everything from them.
At All-In, it’s The House of Black against The Acclaimed and….well, that fun loving Daddy Ass cant be there. But there is a Bad Ass coming to London, and his name is Billy Gunn!!!
ROH Tag Team Championship Match
The Hardy Boyz vs Aussie Open
Aussie Open goes on the beatdown quick, but The Hardyz are able to boune back and corner both guys. They single out Davis and get some Poetry in Motion. Fletcher is sent outside, so is Davis. Fletcher back in, double elbows from Matt, then a leg drop combo. Matt leaves the ring for Davis, while Jeff drops an axe handle on the head of Fletcher.
We are back from break and Fletcher tags in. They double team Jeff in the corner. Whip to Jeff, Jeff ducs under, elbows out the corner to Fletcher, right to Dvais, whisper in the Wind to both men. Tag to Matt. Back body drop to Fletcher. Delete head smashes. Davis in, Matt ducks under, tries for Twist of Fate, Davis holds on, so Matt DDTs! Side Effect! Cover for 1..2..NO!!! Screaming elbow drop off the 2nd rope! Twist of Fate attempt. Fletcher escapes, whips to the corner, elbow from Fletcher. Matt with some rights, tag to Jeff. Matt climbs th corner where Fletcher sits. Matt suplexes off the 2nd rope. Matt flies off with a splash. Cover for 1..2…NO!!! Davis stops the pin!
Aussie Open with some double team
Winners: Aussie Open
Kept it short and sweet, thankfully.
Total Rating: **
Match Time: 8:03
Davis grabs the mic. Hands it to fletcher. He says there will be no Kangaroo Kick, there will be no Double Clothesline. They will still be champions. Bay Bay.
MJF and Adam Cole are here. They head to the ring and enter. They go face to face.
We are two minutes past as Cole and MJF look to walk away, but get attacked by Aussie Open!!! They fight in corners, with Fletcher stomping Cole down and Davis doing the same to MJF! They stand tall with their hands up. Fletcher tells Davis to hit them with a double clothesline, but MJF is up to hop on the back of Davis! Big kick from Cole to Fletcher! Another to Davis! MJF and Cole: DOUBLE CLOTHESLINE! Whip to Davis, Davis holds on, and he leaves. But Fletche is still in the ring!
MJF Signals The Kangaroo Kick! Davis attacks him from behind! Superkick to Davis! Fletcher looks to attack Cole, but MJF saves him!!! Cole looks to Superkick, Fletcher drops! MJF grabs the boot!
HUG IT OUT!
They go face to face! Nose to nose. MJF grabs his title, holds it high, and goes back to face Cole. Cole looks at the title, extends his hand. MJF shoulder checks Cole as he walks, stops at the ropes, buts his diamond ring on….thinks…then puts it back in his pocket and hugs Cole to
End Show
