Dark Pegasus Video Review: Survivor Series 2001

Survivor Series 2001 by J.D. Dunn And so it has come to this… After blowing the initial WCW invasion by making the wrestlers look like jobbers upon their arrival, Vince “saved” the angle by resurrecting ECW and uniting it with WCW as a vague “alliance.” Steve Austin soon joined the Alliance because you can’t have some scrub like Booker T leading WCW. A bunch of WWF wrestlers jumped ship, meaning that the Alliance was primarily made up of WWF guys, turning the entire feud into WWF vs. WWF anyway. Not only that, but with the influx of WCW titles, EVERYONE had a title belt, and they traded them back and forth until it just became a big blur. Leave it to Mick Foley to be fan friendly. He came out, voiced every problem the fans had with this massive pile of crap they had the nerve to call an angle, and basically apologized for the state of the WWF. His solution was to unify the superfluous titles (except for the Cruiserweight and Light-Heavyweight titles because no one cared) and put an end to the war in a traditional Survivor Series match. So here’s the deal: whichever side wins, they all keep their jobs and everyone on the other side is fired – unless they hold an existing title or win the Immunity Battle Royal coming up later in the evening. November 18, 2001 Live from Greensboro, N.C.. Your hosts are Jim Ross and Paul Heyman. Opening Match, European Title: Christian vs. Al Snow. Christian actually won the title from Bradshaw on Smackdown, but the show ran long so the WWF cut out the match. That should tell you how important the title was by this point. Snow gets the “Tough Enough” entrance music, which makes him infinitely more credible. Snow hits a backdrop and stops to argue with Teddy Long, so Christian nails him from behind and whips him into the buckle. He hits a Russian Leg Sweep for two and grounds the match with a chinlock. Christian cuts off the double-underhook headbutts. Al Snow gets them on a second try and gets two off a spinebuster. Al stops to argue again, so Christian hits the Inverted DDT. He talks trash in lieu of a cover, so Snow small packages him for two. Christian rolls through a crossbody for two and walks into the Snowplow. ONE, TWO, THR-NO! Christian tricks Snow into chasing him and then crotches him with the rope. That sets up the Unprettier at 6:32. This was a fine opener. **1/2 In the back, the Alliance starts to unravel at the seems because Steve Austin might be rejoining the WWF. Elsewhere, Vince McMahon is confident that the WWF is going to win because he’s used to taking calculated risks. So would “Yeah, I can afford to lose $40 million on the XFL,” be considered “calculated?” William Regal interrupts and tells Vince not to be so glib because Steve Austin is absolutely, positively on the side of the Alliance. William Regal vs. Tajiri. Regal beat up Torrie Wilson to help set this up. Tajiri fires off a series of kicks (of course). Regal’s nose starts to bleed (of course), so he comes back with stiff forearms (of course). They blow the Tarantula spot, so Regal improvises, and they try it again. Actually, that looked pretty smooth by the Regalmeister. Tajiri’s neck gets caught in the ropes in the “hangman” spot, so William tries to strangle him. Tajiri ranas out of the Butterfly Bomb and kicks Regal in the face. That sets up the Buzzsaw Kick, but Regal ducks and finishes with the Butterfly Bomb at 2:58. WAY short. *1/2 Torrie runs out to check on Tajiri, so Regal returns and powerbombs her. In the back, Test gets oiled up and hits on Stacy Keibler. Pfft. Like she’d ever have anything to do with him in real life. U.S. Title vs. Intercontinental Title: Edge vs. Test. Ross explains that the winner of the WWF/Alliance war will determine which title survives. The other will be dissolved. Not that it mattered in the long run because they’re both still around. Heyman recounts the history of both titles through his rose-colored glasses. Sure, everyone wants to go back to Greg Valentine, Tully Blanchard, and Magnum T.A.. People forget that the recent history of the title was more along the lines of the One Man Gang and Konnan. Not only that, but both titles had bounced around so much just in the few months of the WWF/Allliance feud that they became meaningless. Edge hits a crossbody early, but Test uses the power of the pummel to dominate the majority of the match. Edge cuts him off with a dropkick and blocks the pump-handle slam. Test spears Edge for two and hits that pump-handle slam. ONE, TWO, THRE-NO! Edge hits a spear. ONE, TWO, THRE-NO! Test picks him up for a Full Nelson slam, but Edge counters to a rollup for the win at 11:18. At least Edge made the most of his push. **1/2 In the locker room, Stephanie McMahon-Helmsley kvetches to Kurt Angle about the possibility of losing all her power and money and becoming a, blecch, “normal person.” Elsewhere, Lita asks Jeff Hardy what the deal is with Matt Hardy because he’s been acting funny. Matt comes out of the locker room and explains he’s just stressed about the whole “being out of a job” thing. Lita accepts that explanation – until Trish Stratus comes out of the same locker room. Hmm. WWF vs. WCW Tag Team Titles: The Hardy Boyz vs. The Dudley Boyz (w/Stacy Keibler). Ah, Duchess of Dudleyville Stacy. ::drool:: This match-up was already long played out at this point. Heyman makes a half-hearted attempt to make it interesting by saying they’ve never faced off in a cage before. It doesn’t come into play much early as the Hardyz hit their usual tandem moves. Jeff plays face-in-peril briefly before they throw out the tag rules and just start brawling. The Dudz launch Matt into the cage face first. They try the same thing with Jeff, but he lands on the top rope and scurries up the cage. Bubba catches him, though, and drags him back in for a Doomsday Device. Sick spot as Bubba avalanches Matt’s face into the cage. Stacy approves, and I approve of Stacy, so by proxy, I approve of that spot. The Dudz go up, but D-Von misses the diving headbutt, and Bubba misses the senton. The Hardyz try the same, but this time, they successfully connect with the legdrop/splash combo. D-Von stops the count, though. Bubba calls for the tables, so Stacy uses her feminine wiles (or, actually, ass cheeks) to distract Nick Patrick and steal the key. She unlocks the door and tosses in a table. Matt breaks up the 3D and goes out over the top. The crowd thinks the Hardyz have won, but BOTH guys have to go out to win. That leaves Jeff alone in a 2-on-1. STRATEGERY! Jeff knocks D-Von onto the table and climbs up the cage. Matt screams for him to come down so they can, you know, win the match. Instead, Jeff realizes there is a hole in his heart, and that hole can only be filled by putting another man through a table. He comes off the top with the Swanton, but it misses. Moron. D-Von covers and picks up the win and both sets of titles at 15:45. This would be the catalyst for Matt’s heel turn, even though Jeff was clearly the selfish one. **3/4 Mick Foley joins us from WWFNY and rightly says that, if the WWF Commissioner has to answer to Vince McMahon anyway, the commissioner is a joke. That’s a problem to this day, and when you add in useless “vice commissioners” and “assistant general managers” it gets that much stupider. In the hallway, Test punks out Scotty II Hotty and takes his place in the Immunity Battle Royal. Immunity Battle Royal. Tazz enters himself in the Battle Royal, although he turned on the Alliance so no one knows who he’s with. Bradshaw clotheslines Hurricane out, prompting Heyman to imply that Bradshaw should be disqualified as per the NWA’s over-the-top rule. Test just hangs out on the outside. Billy and Chuck, who were already teaming but not yet gay, toss Diamond Dallas Page. Hugh Morrus and Chavo Guerrero run in and join the Battle Royal. Tazz stops to talk trash to Heyman, so Billy Gunn tosses him over. Tazz goes after Heyman who hides behind JR. Kidman, who looks like a clean-cut CM Punk here, tries a flying crossbody on Bradshaw but gets launched out. The final four are Billy Gunn, Test, Bradshaw and Lance Storm. Storm and Bradshaw are fighting against the ropes, so Test tosses them both. Billy charges and ducks a big boot, but Test boots him out on the rebound at 7:36. Test earns immunity from being fired for the next year. No immunity from sucking, though. ** In the hall, Shane McMahon assures Booker T that Austin is on the up and up. WWF Women’s Title: Trish Stratus vs. Jacqueline vs. Lita vs. Ivory vs. Mighty Molly vs. Jazz. Jazz makes her debut as a member of the Alliance (we assume). She certainly makes an impact on Lita, picking her up and just RAMMING her down. Lita comes back with a headscissors. Mighty Molly and Jackie go at it for a while. Trish gets a huge pop when she comes in. Lita and Jackie team up for Poetry in Motion, but Jackie double-crosses her on a second try. Big chant for Lita. She hits a moonsault, but Trish backdrops her to the floor. Jazz misses a charge and spills to the floor. That allows Trish to hit Ivory with Stratusfaction for the win at 4:23. Believe it or not, there was a time when Trish was seen as undeserving of the title. * In the back, Vince gives his “if you lose, don’t come home” speech. I should point out the ridiculous segment a few weeks before this show where Shane announced his Alliance team, which included Shane himself. Vince was so upset that he actually said, “Shane put himself in the main event. That means I have to put myself in the main event.” And the next sound you heard was the entire fanbase saying, “WHY?!” Big Show later replaced Vince after they realized how stupid that was, but the whole idiotic thing just shows Vince’s mindset at the time and why this was a big failure. WWF vs. Alliance, Winner Take All: The Rock, Chris Jericho, The Undertaker, Kane & The Big Show vs. Steve Austin, Kurt Angle, Booker T, Rob Van Dam & Shane McMahon. So the WWF vs. WCW was supposed to be the guaranteed biggest moneymaker of all time, and it comes down to this team representing WCW – the son of the WWF owner, the WWF champion, a WWF guy who debuted after the WWF had already won the real war, a guy who represents a company that *hated* WCW, and one actual WCW guy – Booker T. And I know what you’re thinking – well, they needed to boost the star power because they couldn’t sign Steiner, Flair, Hall, Nash and Sting. And my counter to that is: maybe they shouldn’t have started an angle if they didn’t have confidence in it working. Anyhoo, the big ballyhoo here is that Austin may or may not jump ship and rejoin the WWF. Or it could be RVD, who was cozying up to Vince a few weeks earlier. He and Rock slug it out for old time sake. You know how I said the Hardyz/Dudleyz was stale because they wrestled so often in 2001? Well, Austin and Rock probably had just as many matches, but they show why they are STEVE AUSTIN and THE ROCK by freshening it up every time out. In this case, Steve plays the part of the Rock, and Rock plays the part of Austin, which is just fantastic to see. Kurt and Kane go at it because they were having some good matches around this time. Shane spends most of the early part of the match making saves after his guys get their asses kicked. He waits until all of the other Alliance members hit their finishers on Big Show and then adds an elbow to eliminate him at 12:41. The WWF guys respond by hitting all their finishers on Shane. Jericho gets the honors of eliminating him at 14:31. Jericho fends off Angle and RVD. Kane tags in and destroys RVD until Booker hits him from behind. RVD hits the Five-Star Frogsplash, but Kane catches him by the throat. Booker saves again, allowing RVD to hit a flying sidekick to send Kane packing at 18:20. Taker destroys all four remaining Alliance members by himself. Finally, after Taker’s given Angle the Last Ride, Austin sneaks in and hits him with the Stunner. Austin drags Angle on top, and the Taker gets eliminated at 20:02. That leaves Jericho & the Rock against the Alliance. Booker hits Rock with a sidekick, but Rock whips him into Angle and schoolboys him at 22:32. Jericho and RVD go at it. Van Dam hits a spinkick, but Jericho hits him with the Breakdown out of nowhere at 24:48. Austin takes Rock to the floor and catapults him into the post. That leaves Jericho alone in a two-on-one. Austin and Angle doubleteam him like jackals. Austin and Y2J botch some sort of spot and stand there looking at each other like goofs. More botchery as Jericho tries to pull Angle back off an Irish Whip, but Angle slips, and they stand there looking like goofs. Austin goes up for the FU elbow on Jericho but decides he’s too far away. Well, at least only Austin looked like a goof on that one. That’s improvement. Rock gets the hot tag, Dragon Screws Angle, and finishes him with the Sharpshooter at 31:50. That seemed like a quick tapout, but it makes sense in the context of the booking, which we’ll see. Jericho can’t finish Austin with the Liontamer, and Austin gets his knees up to block the Lionsault. Jericho slips behind Austin and schoolboys him. Austin reverses that to his own rollup, though, and eliminates Jericho at 34:28. Jericho throws a fit and delivers the Breakdown to the Rock on his way out, not because he’s turning on the WWF, but because he really hates the Rock. Undertaker returns and chews him out. Austin is only able to get two, but he tosses the Rock to cut off his comeback. They brawl on the outside, won by Austin. Back in, Austin locks in the Sharpshooter, but Rock makes the ropes. Rock responds with his own crappy Sharpshooter, but Austin makes the ropes. Austin goes low, but Rock blocks the Stunner and hits his own Stunner! ONE, TWO, THR-Nick Patrick pulls Earl Hebner out and knocks him out. Rock goes after Patrick and takes the Rock Bottom from Austin. Patrick doesn’t give a fast count like you’d think he might. Then again, given Starrcade ’97, maybe he thinks that is fast. Austin knocks Patrick silly and brings Earl back in. Rock shoves Austin into Early, but Austin turns and hits the Stunner. No ref. Kurt Angle runs down and… HITS AUSTIN! That sets up the Rock Bottom at 44:45. Angle gets a huge face pop for turning back to the WWF, and JR’s in-your-face gloating to Heyman is hilarious. Once the scrubs were eliminated, it picked up tremendously. Despite the stipulations, though, the match wound up being meaningless. ***3/4 And why was the match meaningless? Well, let’s take a look: The stipulation was that everyone from the losing side who didn’t have a title would be fired. Christian has the European Title. He’s safe. The Dudleyz are the tag champions. They’re safe. RVD has the Hardcore Title. He’s safe. Austin has the WWF Title. He’s safe. Angle was the mole, so he’s safe. Test won the Immunity Battle Royal, so he’s safe. In fact, everyone that anyone cares about (outside of Booker T and William Regal) was safe before the main event even took place. The next night, most things would go back to where they were before the WCW invasion. Vince would accept Stephanie’s apology. William Regal would join the Kiss My Ass club and be reinstated. Heyman was out. Lawler was back in. Austin was the rebel babyface again. Angle turned was turned heel for helping the WWF (that was a weird one).

The 411: The actual survival match at the end is pretty good, but it's just more Rock/Austin, something that would have happened had the WCW buyout never occurred. Everything else was somewhere in the middle. The Hardyz and Dudleyz was played out, but at least it was a catalyst for the teased breakup of the Hardyz a few weeks later. With everyone else, it became a game of "how do we put this person over without actually putting them over anyone else?" That's why most of the midcard wound up treading water until the brand extension. I'll call this a recommended show for the main event and for historical reasons -- just not the ones the WWF was hoping for.

Final Score:  7.5   [ Good ]