The Furious Flashbacks – WCW Clash of the Champions 29

The Furious Flashbacks – WCW Clash of the Champions 29

Hogan + cronies = suck

So the WCW run continues. I must warn you now that during 1995 and onwards I really don’t have enough shows to make it as an intense reviewing experience as it has been thus far. Apologies ahead of time for that but hopefully I have enough interesting shows to make for some fun reviews. I’ve also done some shows from those years in the past. For example if you pop over to FuriousRage.com and visit the archive there or specifically here you’ll find coverage on a few major shows during the mid 90’s including Starrcade ’95 when it was WCW versus the World.

November 16th 1994. We’re in Jacksonville, Florida. Tonight Hogan, Sting and Evad Sullivan take on the evil trio of Kevin Sullivan, Avalanche (the former Earthquake) and The Butcher (formally Brutus Beefcake) following the ending to Halloween Havoc where most of them were involved. Makes sense. Also Steve Austin gets a second shot at Jim Duggan’s US title and Stars & Stripes go after the tag titles.

Hosts are Fat Tony & Bobby Heenan. The latter rags on Hogan and reminds him that The Butcher sent him to hospital at the last Clash. Gene Okerlund joins us to shill the WCW Hotline.

PROMO TIME – Colonel Robert Parker w/Meng. He has a contract for his team to meet the winners of the tag title match (Buck/Arn) on Saturday night.

Tag titles – Pretty Wonderful (c) v Stars & Stripes

If the challengers don’t win the Patriot has to unmask. Am I alone in thinking that Paul roma just doesn’t look human? He has weird eyes man. Heenan thinks that Patriot has “radiation burns”, which I guess is better than a lizard face but hey. This would be the second time the challengers have challenged PW for the tag titles on TV and the last time they won only to lose the belts back to them at Halloween Havoc. Some guy with a moustache argues intensly with Orndorff pre-match. Nothing like having a damn good argument with a wrestler. Lets off a lot of steam. The champs isolate Bagwell in the early going. Roma cocks up the nip up in the corner but manages a high crossbody for 1. Bagwell busts out a hip toss and a dropkick and in comes Patriot to dropkick Orndorff into some double teaming. Patriot looks FIRED UP here and the crowd is going nutso already with the “USA” chants. Orndorff and Patriot run some chaining and that’s not bad. The headlock to hammerlock doesn’t look contrived and pre-planned for once. Mainly due to Orndorff’s enthusiam and commitment to the match. Who saw THAT coming. Patriot briefly takes a beating but luckily for him Roma is in one of his “I’m so cocky I don’t need to do anything but taunt” moods. So Patriot atomic drops him three times and hits the Thesz Press for 2. Bagwell in but Roma goes for the double team Hotshot, the camera misses it, and Bagwell takes a serious pisser to the floor. Orndorff takes advantage with a series of knee strikes wiping out Bagwell’s mobility/ribcage. Roma hits a dropkick and then poses/shouts at Patriot/poses some more. Powerslam followed by posing and complaints from Bobby Heenan about him not posing. When the heel commentator hates you then you really suck. Orndorff in looking for a snapmare but Bagwell backslides him for 2. Orndorff puts the boots in but gets caught with the sunset flip for 2. Orndorff sure is showing a lot of ass here. Roma low bridges Patriot to leave Bagwell truly isolated. Suplex from Orndorff but Patriot shoves Roma off the ropes and Bagwell reverses the pin on Orndorff to win the belts at 10.07. Finish was a bit messy. I like the idea but it could have done with a more clearly defined babyface move like an inside cradle to distract from Patriot’s attack on Roma. You need one thing happening then the other. **1/4. Replay shows all that happened was Bagwell getting a shoulder up so Orndorff pinned himself. Jesus, he showed a LOT of ass in that match. If I was Roma I’d be pissed off. And shit. But that goes without saying. Both these teams were finally becoming entertaining so obviously they were both done. The champs would lose the belts before Starrcade and Roma would be out the company inside of 4 months.

TV title – Johnny B. Badd (c) v Honky Tonk Man

This is a re-match from Halloween Havoc as well. Nothing like paying for a PPV and then seeing a bunch of the matches off it on free TV weeks later to make you hate a company. Hiring HTM doesn’t help. Especially when he blatantly doesn’t give two shits about the company he’s wrestling in. They run the same arm reversal spot both ways with stomps both ways. HTM’s reaction is far more heel backing off and claiming a hair pull. Heenan goes off on a great tangent/rant about how much he hates Thanksgiving. Well beats watching this. Badd messes up HTM’s hair, which causes him to bail outside and almost cry. So he wants a fight and I think he’s probably forgotten that Badd used to be a boxer. So HTM cheap shots him and puts the boots in. HTM goes up top and drops the fist for 2 and then it’s chinlock time. Oh man, that is the laziest fucking chinlock I’ve seen in years. It makes Randy Orton look like Jushin Liger. Badd punches away and hits the Mr Wrestling II kneelift for 2. HTM shoves Badd into impartial referee Nick Patrick. That gives him time to bail and smash his guitar over Badd’s head for the unashamed DQ at 6.14. ½*. Kinda glad they didn’t go for the whole time limit draw shit again but what’s with protecting HTM? Who gives a shit about him anyway? “I didn’t do nothing” – HTM. Hey, that’s not even Nick Patrick. Damn WCW announcers can’t even tell their own referees apart. Heenan’s “they all look alike” remark afterwards isn’t saving anyone’s blushes.

BACKSTAGE the Faces of Fear (that’d be Sullivan, Butcher and Quake) cut a promo. Butcher suggests they set this up so they can destroy all their enemies at the same time. He just doesn’t look like a main event guy. Quake’s promo is so horrible and shouty and hard to follow. I guess I just hate those stereotypical shouty promos. Hasn’t someone thought to just turn around to these guys and say “it’s TV, they can hear you if you talk quietly guys”. Sullivan says something about the Faces of Fear snuffing out Hulkamania. Hardly Hogan-Flair is it?

Harlem Heat v Nasty Boys

Oh boy. As if to ruin the “shock” ending of the match WCW put up Harlem Heat “w/Sensuous Sherri” who was the big surprise at the end of the match. I mean really. How stupid do you have to be? The Heat debuted the previous year but it’s only now they’re really getting a push as a tag team and they’ve now gained permanent names (originally named Kane & Kole they’re now Booker T and Stevie Ray). By Starrcade they’d be tag team champions for the first of ten times. The Nasties pick off Stevie Ray for some reverse heat. That never really worked well in the South and this is proof of that in action as the crowd doesn’t really react as it should. We take a well timed break to save me from skipping over a chunk of the match. Heenan takes a moment to go for a leak. Booker shows his agility by kicking Brian Knobbs in the face. Tasty. Flying clothesline from Booker and it shocks me that they kept the team together as long as they did because Booker looked like a huge star while Stevie Ray looked like a lummox. Saggs-Stevie is a truly awful match up. I don’t think they do one single thing right during their altercation. Stevie goes to make a phone call but Knobbs punks him out. Apparently the phone call means doom for the opponents. He goes for it again but Knobbs posts him. Booker ends up getting isolated by the other two. So SHOCK HORROR Sherri comes out here. Sherri came in to WCW to kickstart Flair’s heel turn although she was originally slated to manage Ron Simmons. Harlem Heat wasn’t even the original tag team choice for Sherri to manage. She was originally slated to manage the team of Steven Regal and Jean Paul Levesque but the latter left to become Triple H. They also considered putting her with Steve Austin, which makes no sense to me. It continues to amaze me how a great talker like Austin constantly got saddled with managers. Anyway, Sherri changed her image somewhat and managed Harlem Heat instead. So she’s out here and the commentators are shocked although her name appeared on the screen 10 minutes ago. Sherri distracts Knobbs while Booker T drops the diving chop on Saggs for the 3 spot at 10.59. DUD. That match sucked. Booker looked good though.

Vader w/Harley Race v Dustin Rhodes

This match is 4 years, one gimmick, one manager and one company out of place. Not to mention there being no Luna Vachon to jump on Vader’s back at the end of the match. Vader backs Dustin in the corner and lays in a few strikes. “Come on boy, this ain’t no tea party” shouts Vader after deliberately letting him out. Talk about intimidating. He smacks away at Dustin while once again reminding him this isn’t a tea party. Dustin looks like he’s about to explode and he takes Vader down with the double leg and pounds away. Crowd goes BONKERS. He pulls off the mask and slaps away at the fallen Vader. No one treats Vader like this, which gets Dustin over HUGE. He hits a crossbody for 2 and clotheslines Vader outside. Race goes to interfere but Dustin levels him. Vader is given a little recovery time though while Dustin celebrates on the buckles. Dustin punches away as Vader comes back in and punches him down again. Heenan speculates that Vader has an injury or he’d be fighting back. Dustin hits a suplex so Vader bails out again. So, what happened to Vader’s title shot anyway? Rhodes charges him as he comes back in and gets met with the Vader Attack and now Vader takes his time and clubs Dustin down in the corner. Vader misses an avalanche and Dustin rolls him up for 2. And BOOM just like that Vader levels him. Vader decides it’s time to start punching Dustin in the back of the head. Ow! Vader goes for a splash in the corner but gets caught and powerslammed. Dustin goes after a follow up sunset flip, Vader sits but misses and Dustin hits a lariat. Ref gets on him for punching and gets shoved over. Dustin goes for the bulldog but Vader just throws him over the top rope. Oh, fantastic. Looked great. Ref didn’t see it so it’s not a DQ. Vader clocks Dustin with a hard clothesline. VADERBOMB! Dustin gets his foot on the rope so Vader throws a few forearms. Looked botched, something. VADERBOMB…gets 2. What? That was two Vaderbombs. Why didn’t they use the ropes? This makes no sense. It’s like playing a computer game with a glitch in it. Vader slams him in position and heads up again but Dustin barely catches and powerslams him. No pin because he barely stayed with him on the rotation let alone the landing. Dustin tries for a slugfest and rattles Vader somewhat. Here come the elbows and Vader has to use the ropes to stand. Dustin goes up for the diving clothesline, which gets 2. Dustin with a superplex/DDT off the top sort of move gets 2. Didn’t look like one or the other. BULLDOG scores but Race is in so Dustin attacks him. Idiot. Vader squashes him from behind and wheelbarrow bombs Dustin face first into the mat for the pin at 11.46. *** potentially a great match but they had so many stupid spots that felt out of place. Like Dustin pulling off a potentially match winning cover to stop Race interferring when that also would have won him the match. Or the Vaderbomb thing, which didn’t sit right with me. Otherwise they meshed really well and in theory a PPV bout between them would have been great. Except by the time it showed up Dustin was in full Goldust run and into the “less is more” sluggish approach.

POST MATCH Vader tries to kill Dustin off altogether but Jim Duggan runs in for the save, which leads to their match at Starrcade. Vader bails but according to Tony he won’t be forgetting the intrusion.

BACKSTAGE Hulk Hogan, Sting, Evad and Jimmy Hart join Scheme Gene for a few words. Sting talks about families staying together and these guys are a family. Hogan looks really pissed off about Sting’s promo stealing his glory. I mean REALLY pissed off. So he talks some more just to make sure people remember his promo. Hey, he bothers. He’s a walking ego. Even more so than most of these guys.

US title – Jim Duggan (c) v Steve Austin

Tony’s assertion that WCW has big things planned while also mentioning Starrcade (headlined by Brutus Beefcake) is daft. Vader runs out here before we’ve even got underway and attacks Duggan drawing the DQ at 1.00 exactly. DUD. So was Austin injured already? Seeing as he had a triceps problem he could probably hide it for a minute.

Hulk Hogan/Sting/Evad Sullivan w/Jimmy Hart v Kevin Sullivan/Avalanche/The Butcher

Special referee complete with Wee Willy Winkie ref cap is Mr T. Michael Buffer’s announcing is horrific. No way is Sullivan 247lbs btw. He’s only 4’7”. Everyone on the babyface side has yellow and red facepaint on. Evad goes after the heels and throws Kevin in for a brawl with Buffer still in the ring. Kevin takes a beating off the two celebrity babyfaces. Eventually the heels get sick of it and triple team Hogan. Mr T tries to get everyone out but it’s just a clusterfuck. Avalanche splashes Evad’s arm. That pretty much finishes him in this match. Hogan tells Jimmy Hart to take Evad to the back because he’s incapable of carrying on giving us a 3 on 2 dynamic, which is much better. Mainly because Evad sucks and shouldn’t be the main event of anything. Meanwhile Avalanche has Hogan in trouble before tagging Butcher in. He lays in the punches on the already beaten down Hogan. Avalanche back in and Hogan tries to slam him, perhaps forgetting he has bad ribs, and Avalanche falls on top for 2. Sullivan hits a few sledges off the ropes to put Hogan in more trouble. He fights back but gets trapped in the heel corner. Mr T tries to put a stop to that. His inexperience as an official seems to be exposed here. Avalanche hooks up the BORE-HUG! Hogan battles out but gets squished after the Butcher back stabs him again. Avalanche with a powerslam. Walking splash misses so Hogan is in a position to tag Sting, which he does. He jumps in and kicks at all the heels. Stinger Splash for Avalanche. Make that two. Press slam on Sullivan onto Avalanche who catches him and slams him into Sting. So now it’s heat on Sting so Hogan can still get the big hot tag at the end. Boo! The heat on Sting is so boring and predictable that even the youngest wrestling fan could spot it. Sting gets the tag as Butcher comes in and he begs off Hogan so the Hulkster pastes him with rights. Sullivan steals the megaphone but Mr T takes it off him only for Sullivan to yank at it and smack himself in the head with the weapon. Hogan rolls him over and gets the easy pin at 10.54. Ah, the Faces of Fear. What a total joke you are! *.

POST MATCH the Faces put a beating on Sting leaving him to get squashed by Avalanche. Sullivan uses the megaphone on Hogan, then Mr T. Butcher puts Hogan to sleep thus demonstrating his threat to Hogan at Starrcade even though no one buys it still. A bunch of babyfaces run in to try and stop this but Sullivan and Avalanche somehow fend them all off until the ring is just full of officials. Finally someone talks Butcher into releasing the hold and now Hogan isn’t moving. There seems to be some level of conversation about why Jimmy Hart didn’t help and it was curiously his megaphone that got used to prominently during the match. Hmmm. Jimmy Hart turn on Hulk Hogan? Nah. Well, not for a year anyway.

The 411: Vader-Rhodes was good although probably should have been better. The rest of the card was mediocre at best. The direction of the company was downwards and the main event scene was clearly missing the star power of Ric Flair. Now Hogan was facing off against a bunch of WWF midcarders that no one in the Southern States really cared about. Worse still the undercard was heading the same way with an assortment of WWF rejects getting plum roles in the company without putting in half the effort of the people they were replacing. 1994 started off great but in the second half WCW had been taken over by WWF old boys with the emphasis on ‘old’. It was a blatant short term fix but the problem was that nothing was really broken so it didn’t need fixing. Everything in the midcard had been going in the right direction. Now Steamboat, Foley and Austin were gone. The only real talent the company had left in an undamaged state were Vader, Sting, Johnny B. Badd and Steven Regal. Not an ideal situation.

Final Score:  4.0   [ Poor ]