The Smackdown Breakdown 08.10.07

by J.D. Dunn August 10, 2007 From Youngstown, Ohio. Your hosts are Michael Cole and John Bradshaw Layfield. Batista vs. Domino (w/Deuce & Cherry). Batista is pissed about Ric Flair getting clawed last week, so Domino is in for an ass-kicking of epic proportions. Batista hits a suplex and a flying sideslam. Domino ducks to the floor to avoid the Demonbomb, though. Back in, Domino makes the mistake of slapping Batista in the face. It’s meant to make Batista lose his cool, but instead, he just gets more violent. Demonbomb finishes Domino at 3:17, and Deuce takes a spinebuster and another Demonbomb for good measure. 3/4* After the match, Khali appears on the screen and shows Flair passing out last week from the pain of the Iron Claw. More from Chuck Palumbo. Ride of your life, yadda, yadda, yadda. Rey Mysterio vs. Eugene. Rey is making his surprise…HEY! That’s not Rey! That’s Viscera in a Rey mask. Or, maybe it’s Chavo Guerrero. The fans pick up on it quickly, but Chavo’s impression of Rey is pretty funny – at least until it goes on too long. Chavo, for his part, tries to wrestle like Rey, but Rey has much more snap to his moves, even today. The 619 goes horribly awry, and Chavo spills to the floor. He rips off the mask on the outside. **GASP** It’s Chavo Guerrero! Eugene gets pissed and starts wrestling like Chavo, hitting the Triple Verticals. The frogsplash misses, and Chavo is able to finish with a real one at 3:56. *3/4 In the back, Michelle McCool gets catty because Victoria is taking up too much time in the makeup chair making out with Kenny. I’m not sure who was supposed to be the heel here. Recap of McMahon getting SERVED…with a paternity suit. They have to at least tease Triple H for the possibility of an incestuous child with Steph. Or, how about the obvious choice…the Little Bastard! Mark Henry vs. Sterling Keenan. Keenan wrestled a handful of matches in ROH. He didn’t win there much either. Henry finishes with the bear hug at 1:13. 1/4* Post-match: Henry gloats about knocking off the Undertaker, but a Druid appears in the darkness and pours ashes everywhere. Hmm. Festus is apparently a social butterfly, according to Jessie. Victoria (w/Kenny) vs. Torrie Wilson (w/Jimmy Wang Yang). Torrie starts out hot until Kenny gets too close to her. Yang takes him out with a kick and gets expelled from the match by the ref. That allows Victoria to finish with the Widow’s Peak at 1:33. 1/4* Victoria tries to deliver more punishment, but Michelle McCool makes the save. Cole and JBL announce that the WWE’s Wellness Program located a potentially lethal heart defect in MVP. MVP had surgery, though, and he’ll be okay. He’s tough. He’s a wrestler. MVP claims that his heart condition cost him the match against Matt Hardy last week. Matt Hardy vs. Finlay. JBL starts talking about how great it would be if *he* were Vince’s son. “The allowance!” Cole’s response, “You’re forty years old!” Slow start to the match, but Matt starts dominating early. He hits a nice back elbow, prompting Finlay to bust out the “time out” trick. That would be fine if Hardy hadn’t fallen for that trick before. To the floor, Finlay posts Hardy so we can take a commercial. We come back to Finlay working Matt’s shoulder, of course. During the break, Finlay tossed Matt into the steps. Textbook match follows. JBL even uses that word! Get out of my head, JBL! Matt battles back with his one good arm. Hornswoggle tries to get involved, but Jamie Noble pulls him out and chases him to the back. Matt sneaks in and schoolboys Finlay for two. He tries a Twist of Fate, but Finlay drops out and runs after Noble. Matt wins by lame countout at 17:32. I’m not sure why the didn’t just give Matt the win on the schoolboy. It’s not like it would have hurt Finlay, given the circumstances. **3/4 In the back, Finlay accosts Noble for touching his Hornswoggle. Noble gets cocky because he has Shannon Moore and Funaki to back him up. I’m not sure what would be funnier, Noble not realizing that they want nothing to do with him, or actually depending on Moore and Funaki. It’s a moot point, because Kane sneaks in and slaps Finlay around a bit. Kane vs. Sylvan. Sylvan is apparently going to receive another jobber push. That sentence right there should tell you that something is demonstrably wrong with the system. He’s got bleached hair now, for a moment making me think they stole Andrew Martin back from TNA. Kane destroys him and finishes with the chokeslam at 2:42. 1/4* Finlay runs in after the match and destroys Kane with the shillelagh. In the back, Vickie Guerrero and Teddy Long have the most uncomfortable conversation in the history of time. I’ll give you a hint. Her wedding gift to him is Viagra. By the way, what kind of world are we living in when they can butcher a great Elvis tune to hock Viagra?! Masterlock Challenge: Easily the best Masterlock challenge in some time. Chris Masters couldn’t find anyone in the locker room, so he asks someone from the crowd. Problem: His first pick is a high school football stud, an amateur wrester…and he just got out of prison after serving a stretch for manslaughter! Masters decides not to humiliate him in front of his family, so he goes and finds a skinny guy for the challenge. The scrawny dude is no match for Masters. In the back, Ric Flair tells Batista that the power of Khali’s Iron Claw dwarfs Mulligan’s or Von Erich’s. See, this is a role only Ric Flair can fill, and when he says it, it means something. The Great Khali vs. Ric Flair. Khali overpowers Flair and grounds Flair with a Trapezes Claw. Cole and JBL talk about how big Khali’s hands are and how that makes this Claw more powerful than anyone else’s. See, *that’s* how you put over size. It’s not “wow, you have to be here in person to appreciate how big he is because a TV screen doesn’t do him justice.” *Big* is meaningless on its own. Here, Khali’s size is actually able to help him do a move which would be laughable by anyone else. Flair goes low and chops Khali down. That just pisses off Khali, though, and he Claws Flair down for the pin at 4:39. Khali refuses to release the hold, opting instead to smother Flair with his massive hand. Batista tries to make the save, but Khali puts him down with the Claw as well! * The 411: The last two weeks have gone a long way toward putting Khali over as the monster with the hold that kills. Now, if they just have Batista work over his hand at Summerslam to complete the storyline, everything will be copasetic. Chavo as Rey was okay, but they could use a promo from Rey talking about how he lost months out of his wrestling life because of Chavo. Oh, and Matt versus MVP still looks to be the sleeper match of the card.