100 Percent Fordified: CHIKARA Martyr Yourself to Caution

Manhattan, NY – 9.18.2011

Commentary is provided by Gavin Loudspeaker, Leonard F. Chikarason, Bryce Remsburg, Jakob Hammermeier, Tim Donst and UltraMantis Black.

”12 Large: Summit” Tournament Match (Block A)
Sara Del Rey (4 Points) vs. Ophidian (0 Points)

Sara breaks a lock-up cleanly in the corner. Ophidian trips her into a seatbelt pin for two. Sara goes for an armbreaker. Ophidian grapevines her leg but Sara steps over into a leg lock. Ophidian rolls free. Sara kicks Ophidian in the back and chest after a snapmare. Ophidian rolls up Sara for two to break a leg hold. Sara blocks a Magistral cradle. Ophidian breaks a side headlock. He kicks Sara but Sara kicks back even harder. She traps Ophidian in the ropes and kicks him multiple times in the chest. When she’s finished, Ophidian and her exchange chps. Ophidian pummels her into the corner. She turns the tables and lays in her own barrage of strikes. Ophidian hits a modified chinbreaker to block the Royal Butterfly. He then slams her shoulder first to the mat. Ophidian targets Sara’s shoulder on the mat. As Sara looks to fight up, Ophidian applies a Fujiwara armbar. Sara escapes. Ophidian misses a springboard moonsault. Ophidian ducks a kick and backslides Sara for two. Ophidian goes for another Magistral Cradle and seatbelt pin, but again gets a two count on both occasions. Ophidian stands on Sara’s arm and then back bridges on Sara’s neck and shoulders. He rolls into a pin for two. Ophidian headstands in the corner but is met with a kick from Sara before he can do anything else. Sara kicks Ophidian as Ophidian comes off the top ropes. She boots Ophidian thrice. She can’t get a piledriver so she hits the Koppu Kick for two. Ophidian rolls Sara into a prawn hold for two. Sara then tries a modified Gedo clutch for two. Ophidian hits the Duat Driver for two. Ophidian hits a 450 splash and Sara kicks out. She goes for the Ophidia Death Grip on Sara’s bad shoulder, but Sara throws him off right away. She stomps on Ophidian and powerbombs him for two. Ophidian goes for the Death Grip again. Sara turns it into the Royal Butterfly for the pin at 13:59. I loved this match. The moment Sara went for the Royal Butterfly, Ophidian targeted her shoulder right away and didn’t let up for a second. Even when the Death Grip failed, he went for a second time and his foolishness caused him to find himself in the very move he was looking to avoid the whole time. THAT is storytelling my friends, and a real exciting opening match to boot. ***1/2

The Colony (Soldier Ant & Green Ant) vs. The Throwbacks (Dasher Hatfield & Sugar Dunkerton)

Soldier Ant and Hatfield reach a stalemate on the mat. Green Ant and Dunkerton tag in. Green Ant goes for the leg so Dunkerton grabs the ropes right away. Dunkerton gets two with a small package. Green Ant brings Dunkerton to his corner in a front facelock and tags in Soldier Ant. Soldier Ant applies a figure four leg lock. Dunkerton turns it over, forcing Soldier Ant to break. Green Ant tags in and rolls up Dunkerton for two. Dunkerton pushes Green Ant to the corner and tags in Hatfield. Green Ant armdrags him over, causing him to tag Dunkerton back in. Some back and forth ends with a leapfrog from Dunkerton. Both guys tag out, causing all four participants to the be in the ring. More back and forth leads to the classic M-Pro comedy spot. The Throwbacks drop Soldier Ant with a tandem flapjack for two. The Throwbacks team up on Soldier Ant. He manages to counter an attack from Dunkerton and tags in Green Ant. Now The Colony isolate Dunkerton in their corner. Some jabs from Dunkerton allows him to tag in Hatfield. Hatfield immediately gets caught from Soldier Ant and takes Dunkerton’s position as the Colony’s marked man. Hatfield catches Soldier Ant with a powerslam. Dunkerton and Green Ant tag in. Dunkerton looks unphased by Green Ant’s headbutt, so Green Ant barrages him with strikes. Dunkerton escapes Soldier Ant’s grasp and tags out. Instead of another M-Pro spot, the four competitors tie their shoe at the end. They admonish referee Nick Papagiorgio for not tying his shoe and send him to the back. Jon Barber comes out to take his place so that the match has a referee. Hatfield counters a hip toss with a roll-up. Soldier Ant and him trade pin attempts but can’t get the three. Soldier Ant sends himself and Hatfield to the floor. Dunkerton gets in a few shots to Green Ant. Green Ant drops him with an Angle Slam for two. Dunkerton drops Green Ant face first onto his shoe. Green Ant clotheslines him down for two. Dunkerton trips Green Ant off the apron. In the ring, Soldier Ant small packages Hatfield for two. Hatfield reverses it for the pin at 17:43. I liked the intensity both teams showed, but this never really came into anything cohesive. It was the right mix of action and fun the fans expect from both teams. I am also thrilled that The Throwbacks now get a shot at Los Campeonatos de Parejas because of this victory. **3/4

Icarus tells us that he read Gregory Iron’s blog about his sad childhood, and yet he doesn’t care. Icarus tells us the story of his childhood, which is completely fabricated. Icarus believes Iron has been lying about his disability for years and plans to expose him tonight.

Gregory Iron vs. Icarus

Icarus grabs Iron’s handicapped arm before for the bell. Iron smacks him away. He knocks down Icarus and goes for a submission. Scared, Icarus rolls out to the apron. He then goes backstage after the fans boo him for trying to take off his ring jacket. Icarus comes in from the opposite side and spears Iron for two. Icarus puts him in a bodyscissors. A senton splash and legdrop get him two. Icarus puts Iron in a bear hug. Iron elbows his way free. Icarus ducks the Gimp Slap and suplexes Iron for two. He takes off his jacket while putting Iron in a Camel Clutch. Icarus kicks Iron against the ropes. Iron Gimp slaps him and backdrops Icarus onto the entrance stage. Iron crossbody’s Icarus while he is still on the stage. In the ring Iron fights Icarus off the ropes. Iron hops off the ropes into a sunset flip and pins Icarus at 8:16. This was a step below their other matches. The lack of offense from Iron didn’t make for a very interesting match. I appreciate the finish since it leads us into another rematch, I just hope that it’s a step-up from all of their encounters thus far. *1/2

Donst talks up Tursas ability off screen as a metaphor for Donst not being on the most recent CHIKARA shows. Donst says Tursas will knock down the Young Bucks just like King Kong did while he reminds the fans just how great he is. Donst says the fans will see his hand raised in victory once more.

The Young Bucks (Nick Jackson & Matt Jackson) vs. Die Brüderschaft des Kreuzes (Tim Donst & Tursas)

Donst has some control on the mat until Matt rolls him up for two. Donst pulls Matt’s hair and nose. He puts him in a Camel Clutch and grabs his face and ears multiple times. Matt breaks a wristlock with a dropkick. He armdrags Donst and tags in Nick. The Bucks hit Donst with N’Sync. Nick twists on a wristlock. He tags out to Matt who comes in with a double stomp to Donst’s extended arm. Nick does the same. Matt delivers a flipping neckbreaker to Donst onto Nick’s knee. Tursas tags in. The Bucks dropkicks do nothing. Nick hits one as Matt traps Tursas’ head with his feet. Tursas sends Matt to the floor and dropkicks Nick for two. Matt puts on a sleeper. Donst takes him off Tursas’ back with an STO across his knee. Tursas pitches Nick to the floor, allowing the BDK to bully Matt in their corner. Matt almost gets a tag but Tursas grabs him and slams him in the corner. Matt wheelbarrows Donst to get to his corner. He tags in Nick who knocks down Donst with a splash and back elbow. He dropkicks Tursas off the apron. Donst throws Matt to the stage. Nick gives Donst a springboard X-Factor. He hops to the apron where Tursas trips him and clothesline him on the floor. Matt dives onto Tursas from the top rope. He then drops Donst with a standing Shiranui in the ring. Tursas breaks the pin. Matt blocks an attack from both BDK members. Donst blocks a tumbleweed ace crusher, and with Tursas’ help hits Death Valley Driver. Tursas splashes Matt for two. Nick slips out of Tursas’ Kreuz Bomb on the floor while Matt and Donst trade forearms in the ring. Donst bulldogs Matt and gets tripped by Nick. Nick hits an enzuigiri from the floor. He dives onto Tursas. Tursas catches him and slams Nick back first on the guardrail. Matt gives Donst two Northern Lights suplexes, then a third into the corner. Nick superkicks Tursas. Matt foolishly looks to put Tursas on his shoulders. He gets him up but Donst knees him in the gut. Nick knee strikes Donst in the corner. The Bucks hit Tursas with four superkicks. They then connect with More Bang For Your Buck on Donst for the pin at 15:24. Aside from Claudio, Donst was Tursas’ best makeshift partner from the BDK so far. They had great chemistry and were able to use their different strengths to do considerable damage to the Bucks. The Bucks were crafty enough to sneak in their finisher on Donst to make it a win, giving them two points towards a title shot. ***

Marshe Rockett reminds us that it was Ares’ order that took Da Soul Touchaz’s managers C-Red and Dymond out of wrestling for good. Rockett says now that they have taken out the BDK soldiers, it’s time for him to take out the general.

Marshe Rockett vs. Ares

Ares brings Delirious out on a chain with him. Ares gets to the ropes to break an aggressive lock-up. He does the same thing two more times. He rakes Rockett’s eyes and forearms him in the back. Rockett drops him with a spinebuster. He lays in some forearms on the mat. He delivers a dropkick and running back elbow. A slam and legdrop get him a two count. Ares rolls to the floor. He trips Rockett off the apron, but Rockett chops him and throws him against the ring frame. He boots Delirious to cut off his attack. Ares snaps Rockett’s neck on the top rope and suplexes him back in the ring. Ares pulls on Rockett’s nose. Ares chokes him on the middle rope, and Delirious does the same behind the referee’s back. Ares hits a twisting suplex for two. Rockett chops Ares in the corner. Ares rakes Rockett’s eyes and rams his shoulder into Rockett’s mid-section in the corner. Rockett boots him and delivers a bulldog out of the corner. Delirious grabs Rockett’s leg as he hits the ropes. This allows Ares to hit the Blue Thunder Bomb for two. Rockett escapes a suplex and hits a standing axe kick. The momentum from his enzuigiri causes Ares to the roll to the stage. Rockett hits a rope assisted twisting DDT for two. Ares sends Rockett to the apron. Rockett comes off the top with a crossbody. Rockett catches him with a jumping ace crusher. Delirious pulls him out of the ring to break the pin. Rockett fights him off and goes up top. Ares distracts the referee allowing Delirious to throw him off the top. Ares hits the Toblerone Driver for the pin at 8:18. This really served as a set-up for the next match, otherwise I would have loved for Rockett to pin Ares here and have the feud end. Maybe that’s for another time though. **

UltraMantis Black attacks Ares after the match and drops him with the Praying Mantis Bomb. Hallowicked comes out and goes face to face with Delirious, trying to talk some sense into him. Delirious once again recognizes Hallowicked’s stem. Mantis stands above Ares and gives him his final warning, saying he wants to face Ares in the ring one on one again. From behind, Kobald of the Batiri runs in and spears Hallowicked. Mantis confronts him, giving Sinn Bodhi the opportunity to come in and attack him from behind. Obariyon and Kodama join him shortly thereafter. Frightmare comes out to help, but the numbers are still in the Dark Army’s advantage. With that, Crossbones comes out! He takes out everyone with the old Order of the Neo-Solar Temple flag. The last time we saw Crossbones was in May of 2010 when Delirious broke his clavicle and caused him to leave wrestling for a very long time. Crossbones is Mantis’ mystery partner in tonight’s eight man tag. The referee enters and the match has started.

The Spectral Envoy (UltraMantis Black, Hallowicked, Frightmare & Crossbones) vs. Sinn “Kizarny” Bodhi & The Batiri (Obariyon, Kodama & Kobald)

Crossbones suplexes Kobald as everyone else brawls on the floor. Frightmare is being choked by Bodhi. Crossbones kicks Kobald in the back for one, then pitches him to the floor. Hallowicked boots Kobald in the corner. Kobald pushes Hallowicked to the floor. Frightmare backdrops Obariyon on the floor and Bodhi whips Mantis into the guardrail. Bodhi comes into the ring and grabs Hallowicked from behind. He knocks him down with a clothesline for two. Bodhi chops and headbuts Crossbones on the floor. Obariyon and Kodama team up on Hallowicked. Frightmare goes to save him but also gets overwhelmed. Hallowicked comes off the top with a knee to Kodama. Crossbones splashes Bodhi against the stage and Mantis slams Obariyon on the floor. He then chokes Kodama against the guardrail with his boot. Hallowicked and Fightmare deliver a side slam/legdrop combo on Obariyon for two. Kodama attacks Frightmare. Frightmare goes for kneecolepsy but gets cut off. Kobald spears Crossbones while Bodhi holds him. Frightmare suplexes Kodama and Obariyon breaks the pin. Frightmare goes for the Kneecolepsy again. Bodhi attacks him from behind. He sends Obariyon to the top rope. Hallowicked throws Bodhi to the floor. Kobald drops Frightmare with a neckbreaker and Obariyon hits a SICK Flying DDT. Hallowicked breaks the pin. Hallowicked gives Obariyon a step-up enzuigiri for two. Obariyon drops him with a backcracker. Frightmare breaks the pin. Hallowicked hits Obariyon with the Go 2 Sleepy Hollow. Mantis gives him the Praying Mantis Bomb but Bodhi breaks the count. Crossbones splashes Kobald in the corner. Kobald gives Frightmare a variation of chops. He and Kodama attack Crossbones and Firghtmare while Bodhi is teamed up on by Hallowicked and Mantis. Crossbones sends Kodama and Kobald out. Mantis drops Bodhi with the Cosmic Disaster for the pin at 11:27. This type of brawl was the exact way this feud should have ended. We had the feel good return of Crossbones, the leader of one group pinning the other and a wild energetic brawl that the fans tracked with the entire time. Big thumbs up for all parties involved. ***

Johnny Gargano says people like to hear him and Chuck Taylor talk, but tonight the time for talking is over. Taylor reiterates that point and says tonight he and Gargano will prove everything they have been saying.

Los Campeonatos de Parejas
Mike Quackenbush & Jigsaw (Campeones) vs. F.I.S.T. (Chuck Taylor & Johnny Gargano)

Quack and Jigsaw have been champions since 12.12.2010 and this is their third defense. Derek Sabato is the referee for this contest. Taylor and Gargano jump Quack and Jigsaw right before the bell. Gargano aggressively throws Jigsaw to the stage. Quack throws Taylor’s boot into Gargano and forces Gargano to backdrop Taylor. He drops double knees on Gargano for two. Quack dropkicks F.I.S.T. to the floor and Jigsaw dives off the top onto both of them. Quack sweeps Gargano’s leg. Jigsaw slams him stomach first onto Quack’s knees and kicks him. Quack and Jigsaw hit Taylor with some tandem offense for a two count. Jigsaw and Quack hit the double stomp/Jig N’ Tonic combo to win the first fall at 1:45. Taylor attacks Quack from behind with a pair of knuckles (Sabato did not see it). Jigsaw ducks the punch and kicks Taylor in the ropes. Gargano cuts off Jigsaw with a slingshot spear. Taylor hits a quebrada for two. Taylor and Gargano team up on Jigsaw while Quack is busy recovering on the floor. Jigsaw sneaks in a sunset flip but gets kicked in the face by Gargano. Jigsaw catches F.I.S.T. with a tandem DDT and inverted DDT. With Quack finally recovered, Jigsaw tags him in. Quack chops Gargano and knocks him down with two elbows. Taylor blocks a palm strike. He armdrags Taylor into Gargano, then gets sent up by Taylor. He manages to dropkick Gargano. While Sabato is checking on Gargano, Taylor falls to the mat and grabs his groin in pain. Thinking Quack had given Taylor a low blow, he calls for a disqualification at 7:20, tying up the match to one fall a piece. Gargano catches Quack with a roll-up for two. Everyone blocks each other’s moves. Taylor and Quack get knocked down with superkicks. Jigsaw German suplexes Gargano for two. Jigsaw blocks the Hurts Donut. Jigsaw enzuigiri’s him in the corner and goes for the Jig N’ Tonic. Taylor kicks Gargano into a Yoshi Tonic and Quack quickly breaks the pin. Quack palm strikes Taylor and goes up to. Taylor evades the attack and drops Quack with the Awful Waffle for two. Jigsaw hits Taylor with a coast-to-coast dropkick. Gargano comes in from behind. He takes a series of chops and then trades forearms with him. Gargano drops to his knees to feign another low blow but Jigsaw superkicks him. He hits the Jig N’ Tonic and Taylor pulls Sabato out of the ring. Sabato of course lets it go. Gargano actually low blows Jigsaw. Sabato comes in but is only able to count two. Gargano and Taylor hit a DDT/Hurts Donut combo for two. Gargano puts Jigsaw in the Gargano Escape with Jigsaw’s bad arm trapped. Taylor blocks Quack from breaking the hold. Sabato allows Jigsaw’s arm to drop once, then awards F.I.S.T. the fall at 11:03, making them the NEW Campeonatos de Parejas. The Sabato stuff was a carry over from their match in July which leads me to believe there is more to F.I.S.T. and Sabato than meet the eye. The action was hot from bell-to-bell and all four participants worked as hard as they possibly could. Regardless of F.I.S.T. winning due to two dishonest falls, it worked so well in context. ***1/2

”12 Large: Summit” Tournament Match (Block A)
Eddie Kingston (6 Points) vs. Fire Ant (4 Points)

Kingston delivers quite the lip service to a pair of fans in the balcony. Kingston throws Fire Ant to the mat. Fire Ant mares his way out of a chin hold. Fire Ant grabs his leg that has been hurt for the past few months (because he’s fantastic). Kingston calls out a fan who gave him some guff. Focusing his attention back to Fire Ant, Kingston body drags his way out of a courting hold. The pace quickens with a little lucha from Fire Ant. He Stops, Drops and Rolls Kingston to the opposite corner. Kingston delivers a haymaker and peppers Fire Ant with various strikes. Kingston delivers a Manhattan drop and boots Fire Ant to the floor. He follows with a suicide dive. Kingston whips Fire Ant into the guardrail twice. Kingston suplexes him on the floor as well. In the ring Kingston hits rapid fire forearms to his face while holding him in a Camel Clutch position. Kingston gives him a Perfect neck snap for two. Fire Ant tries to chop his way up but eats a jab from Kingston instead. Fire Ant makes his way up but gets mowed down with a clothesline for two. Fire Ant knees his way out of a modified Dragon sleeper. Kingston drops Fire Ant with a neckbreaker for two. Kingston misses a yakuza kick, allowing Fire Ant to hit him with an enzuigiri. Kingston rolls to the floor so Fire Ant sends him into the crowd with a suicide dive. Fire Ant flies onto Kingston with a springboard tope con hilo. Fire Ant recovers then hops onto him with a crossbody from the top rope. Vin Gerard disguised as a fan attacks Kingston and jams a chair into his bad leg. Some attendants take Gerard away. Fire Ant begs Bryce Remsburg to not call for a disqualification and Remsburg agrees. Kingston gets in the ring and grabs at his leg while Fire Ant comes off the top rope with a senton for two. Kingston goes for a corner attack but his leg buckles. Fire Ant smartly targets his attack on Kingston’s leg. Fire Ant gets another crossbody from the top then delivers a tornado DDT for two. Kingston clobbers Fire Ant with a clothesline to the neck and chest for two. A capture German suplex also gets him two. Kingston hits a relatively weak yakuza kick and a release suplex for two. Fire Ant victory rolls him for two. Kingston fires back with a hard lariat for two. Fire Ant counters a powerbomb with a stunner. He delivers the Yahtzee Kick and goes for a brainbuster. He fails but drops Kingston with the Beach Break for two. He applies a knee bar to Kingston’s bad leg. Fire Ant fires away with forearms. Kingston fires up and lays in some of his own. Fire Ant goes right back to Kingston’s leg. Kingston gets the strength to hit the Backfist to the Future. FIRE ANT KICKS OUT AT ONE! WHAT THE! Kingston hits the Backdrop Driver and the Sliding D for two. Kingston hits one to Fire Ant’s neck for the pin at 22:27. That was an awesome hard hitting, clobberific good time. I am so pleased to see Kingston’s leg injury carrying over from show to show, especially over the course of four months. Now Kingston tops the B Block and it will be nearly impossible for anyone else in the B Block to catch up. Him vs. Gerard will be interesting. Huge kudos to Fire Ant as well for putting together a really fun narrative with one of the top singles guys in the company. ***3/4

Kingston echoes my sentiments by getting the fans to cheer for Fire Ant.

The 411: The two 12 Large Summit matches and the Campeonatos de Parejas matches warrant the price tag alone. On top of that, The Young Bucks match and the return of Crossbones(!!!!!), as well as some additional storyline advancement make it an essential show for following along with the product as a whole. The atmosphere lended a lot to the show as well and the crowd was appropriately responsive for just about everything. I definitely give this a recommendation. Be sure to check out all of my CHIKARA reviews at my CHIKARA blog; "The CHIKARA Special" and all the CHIKARA news over at "The CHIKARA Special" Tumblr.

Final Score:  7.5   [ Good ]