411’s WWE Smackdown Report 9.17.10

Hello and welcome to the WWE Smackdown Report. Last week, The Undertaker returned to action with a victory over CM Punk, but was one-upped by his brother, Kane, as the show closed with his pyro going off around the Deadman. Also, it remains to be seen, but we may have witnessed Matt Hardy’s final televised WWE match in a loss to Alberto Del Rio. What’s in store for the superstars of Smackdown just two days before Night of Champions? Let us find out…

In order to change things up a little bit, I have dug into the 2010 Smackdown archives and recorded the Win/Loss record of every current Smackdown superstar. Here are a few guidelines:
– These records only reflect matches that have taken place on Smackdown or Pay-Per-View.
– Matches that end or have ended in a No Contest are not counted.
– In the case of Tag Team matches, each member of the losing team gets a Loss and each member of the winning team gets a Win.
– In the case of multi-man matches, every participant besides the winner gets a Loss.
– Some wrestlers will have a third number in their record. This number represents matches that have ended in a Draw.

Smackdown opens with the usual Let It Roll but no pyro. We go straight to a graphic that states Kane will respond to The Undertaker later tonight. Also scheduled, Christian vs. CM Punk.

Cut to Christian in the ring for the return of the Peep Show! Welcome ladies, gentlemen and peeps of all ages. Without any further ado, let him bring out his guest tonight…wait, wait, wait- Ricardo Rodriguez gets on the mic and introduces Alberto Del Rio, as only he can. Christian courteously welcomes Del Rio. This man has made quite the first impression on Smackdown with his own ring announcer, vintage cars and tailor-made suits. However, Christian gets the feeling we are looking at two different men. Is this the entertaining, ambitious Del Rio or the Del Rio who bored us all with his countless vignettes? Like a cheap fajita, all sizzle, no steak. Del Rio thinks all you need to know is that he is the man who took out Rey Mysterio. It was phenomenal. Christian says it’s like this: he has been around long enough to see all the newcomers. From “The Next Big Thing” to a group of male cheerleaders (hold on a second, wasn’t he “somewhere else” during the Spirit Squad-era?) and a guy eating worms thinking he was actually the Boogeyman. Christian has outlasted them all. What he wants to know is whether Del Rio will end up being a flash in the pan. Or is he in fact, the most interesting man in the world? Christian, you think you’re funny? Del Rio is the man who is going to change the WWE forever, bringing pride to his Mexican people. Christian will end up cleaning his houses and washing his dishes. Christian, however, also has pride. He wants to know if Del Rio really has the goods, so he is challenging him to a match at Night of Champions. Del Rio doesn’t like the idea. If he faces Christian at “Night of the Champions,” Christian will end up like a peasant. This interview is over. As for the match, let him think about it, baby. As he is saying that, he taps Christian’s chin. Christian doesn’t take that kindly and responds with a slap. Del Rio takes off his blazer and looks like he is about to retaliate, but he retreats instead. You know what, Christian? Del Rio is done with you. His answer is no. Wink.

Coming up next, The Hart Dynasty vs. Cody Rhodes/Drew McIntyre.

Match One: The Hart Dynasty (8-5) vs. Cody Rhodes (6-3)/Drew McIntyre (14-17-1)

Smith and McIntyre start. Lock-up ends with McIntyre in the corner. McIntyre pushes Smith away and they go for another lock-up, this time with Smith ending up in the corner. He comes out with a kick but McIntyre stops it. Irish whip by McIntyre but Smith slides underneath and gets a rollup which McIntyre bridges out of at two. Back up, Smith misses with a clothesline but connects with a powerslam that gets two. McIntyre with a jawbreaker gives him a chance to tag in Rhodes. Smith connects with a nice belly-to-belly on Rhodes and tags in Kidd. Double shoulderblock gets one. Kidd misses with a clothesline which allows Rhodes to trip him up from behind. Kidd is able to kick him away into the corner. Back up, Rhodes catches Kidd with a back elbow then tries to send him out of the ring. As Rhodes goes to attack, Kidd skins the cat and Rhodes slides through to the outside. Kidd catches him with double boots on the way back. Outside, Natalya slaps (the face!) Rhodes as we go to commercial.

Back from break, McIntyre has Smith in a standing side headlock. Kidd gets the blind tag and trips up McIntyre coming off the ropes. Snapmare by Kidd sets up a kick to the back. McIntyre comes back with a body slam, a stomp and resorts to his favorite shoulder stretch. He turns it into some kind of hand/wrist lock which Kidd is able to escape from by springboarding backwards off the top rope. McIntyre charges but gets caught with a rollup that gets two. McIntyre charges again but is hit with a boot to the chest. On the apron, Kidd tries to knock Rhodes off but gets hit sending behind by McIntyre, sending him to the floor. McIntyre tags in Rhodes who quickly goes outside and rolls Kidd back in. he stomps away hits a bodyslam. Rhodes hits a knee drop that gets two. Tag in to McIntyre who works over the hand and shoulder. Kidd arm drags his way out and tries to tag in Smith but Rhodes breaks it up. Rhodes takes Kidd down and stomps away before locking in a camel clutch. Kidd fights his way out but Rhodes sends him to the corner. Rhodes charges and gets hit with a back elbow. Kidd misses with a clothesline but reverses his way out of a suplex attempt. Rhodes comes back with a Beautiful Disaster that gets two. Tag into McIntyre who slugs away in the corner. McIntyre wants a Future Shock DDT but Kidd reverses with a neckbreaker. McIntyre tags in Rhodes just as Kidd makes the hot tag to Smith. Smith hits with some shoulderblocks and an Irish whip. On the way back, Rhodes connects with a Goldust uppercut from the ground. It doesn’t faze Smith as he hits with a high knee and goes for a Sharpshooter. McIntyre interrupts it but Kidd knocks him out of the ring. Smith sets Rhodes up for a Hart Attack but McIntyre grabs Kidd’s feet as he comes off the ropes. Smith goes for a powerslam but Rhodes reverses into a Cross Rhodes for the win.

Winner: Cody Rhodes/Drew McIntyre in 11:00

Rating: **1/2 (Fun match. Rhodes and McIntyre worked very well as a team with quick tags, isolating Kidd. I would prefer to see both of them get individual singles pushes, but since they need some credible challengers to the Tag Team Championship at NoC, this team isn’t a bad way to go.)

Later tonight, Kane addresses The Undertaker.

Kofi Kingston comes to the ring with a mic in hand. Everyone knows that the only reason Dolph Ziggler is still the IC champ is because of Vickie Guerrero. What kind of man has a woman fight his battles? A coward. And in this case, that woman is a beast. This Sunday, things will be different because if Ziggler gets disqualified or counted out, he will lose the IC championship. Kingston is going to do the WWE Universe a favor, because he loves them. Not only will he win the title, but he will rid the WWE of the most repulsive couple in WWE history. He feels that once Ziggler loses the championship, Guerrero will leave with it. Boom Squad! Boom, boom, boom!

Check one, two! Swagger makes his way to the ring for our next match.

Match Two: Kofi Kingston (13-7) vs. Jack Swagger (8-14-1)

Swagger tries for a takedown but Kingston escapes. Lock-up and Swagger gets a single-leg takedown. Anklelock attempt is blocked. Back up, Kingston catches Swagger with a two kicks. A third kick misses and Swagger slugs away in the ropes before getting another takedown. Swagger wraps in a seated reverse bearhug and is able to get in an anklelock for a quick second before being pushed away into the corner. Kingston runs the ropes as Swagger misses with two clotheslines. Kingston connects with an elbow and gets two. In the corner, Kingston punishes him with some kicks before he is able to roll outside and stall. Back in, Swagger hits low and stretches both shoulders. He transitions into an armbar. Kingston tries to fight it off but Swagger gets another single-leg and catapults him onto the apron. Kingston springboards off the top rope but Swagger catches him in mid-air and drives him into the mat with a powerslam as we go to commercial.

Back from break, Swagger has Kingston in-between the top and middle ropes, clubbing him in the back. He locks in an abdominal stretch between said ropes. Back inside, Swagger hits with a belly-to-belly uranage setting up a Running, Leaping Swagger Bomb that gets two. Swagger continues the attack with a front chancery and a gator roll. Swagger rolls outside and chokes Kingston on the middle rope. The ref breaks it up and Swagger rolls back in for a cover that gets two. He clubs away and body scissors Kingston. Kingston elbows his way out and heads to the corner. Swagger charges but Kingston goes for a pendulum kick which Swagger catches, allowing him to club him on the ropes. Cover gets two. Swagger presses his knee across Kingston’s face and catapults him throat-first into the bottom rope. Snapmare sets up a seated abdominal stretch. Kingston tires to stand but Swagger knocks him back down. He throws him onto the apron and charges but Kingston connects with some kicks in-between the ropes. Kingston climbs to the top and hits a big crossbody that gets two. Kingston hits with his signature chops and a dropkick. He goes for SOS and gets blocked. Trouble in Paradise is also avoided and Swagger locks in an anklelock but Kingston makes it to the ropes quickly. Outside, Swagger tries to kick the steel steps into Kingston but he moves away. Kingston comes back by jumping onto Swagger off of the steel steps. Back in, Kingston gets some mounted punches in the corner but Swagger blocks them at four and goes to the anklelock again. Kingston kicks him away but Swagger comes back with a big boot. Another Running, Leaping Swagger Bomb is blocked and Kingston hits Trouble in Paradise for the win.

Winner: Kofi Kingston in 16:00

Rating: ***1/4 (Tied for the best Smackdown match since I have started recapping. It was very reminiscent of a Kurt Angle match, which is always a good thing. Good win for Kingston heading into NoC, but the inconsistent, A.D.D.-like push of Swagger continues to show.)

Todd Grisham and Matt Striker run down the Hornswoggle/Teddy Long shenanigans and send it to the back for more. Long is with Hornswoggle and a nun in a school setting. Sister Mary Francis and Delicious. She is here to help Hornswoggle speak. Long informs her that he refers to Hornswoggle as Horny. Strike one, Mr. Long! Long takes a seat next to Horny as the nun goes over the ABCs. Horny distracts Long and swaps papers with him. The nun approves of Horny’s work and reprimands Long for having a drawing of a devil on his. Strike Two! Horny throws a paper airplane at the nun and blames Long. Strike Three! She is about to attack Long with a ruler (Oh, no) before Horny admits to doing it. She goes to strike Horny, but Long stops her, allowing Horny to bite and go all Lebron James on her with chalk. Horny doesn’t need a lesson, he needs an exorcism! Moving on…

Later tonight, Kane answers The Undertaker’s request for a No Holds Barred match.

Match Three: Kelly Kelly (6-5)/Rosa Mendes (0-2) vs. Michelle McCool (13-8)/Layla (10-7)

Before the match officially starts, Lay-Cool taunts rookie Naomi and all hell breaks loose…well, kinda. They regroup and the bell sounds. Kelly slams McCool on the mat and beats her head. An Irish whip allows McCool to get close enough to tag in Layla. Lay-Cool is selling the idea of Kelly being very smelly. Kelly attacks both with a double clothesline. In the corner, Kelly stomps away at Layla and tags in Mendes, “The Costa Rican Stunner,” according to Grisham. She pulls Layla by the hair and hits with some elbows. Mendes is distracted by McCool allowing Layla to gain control with a mat slam. McCool chokes her behind the refs back. Cover gets one. Layla sinks in a headlock. Mendes elbows her way out but Layla slams her down. Mendes goes to make the tag but Layla knocks Kelly off the apron. Mendes attempts a suplex but McCool kicks her from behind, setting up Layla to hit a neckbreaker for the win.

Winner: Lay-Cool in 2:00

Rating: ½*(Obvious win goes to Lay-Cool. Nothing to see here.)

Later tonight, Christian vs. CM Punk and Kane’s answer.

Grisham and Striker send it to a video package detailing the history of the WWE Championship. Pretty cool stuff making the championship look very prestigious in addition to hyping the Six Pack Challenge.

In the back, Lay-Cool w/Kaval address Melina. They have come up with a plan to determine who faces her at NoC. Kaval will pull a name out of a hat. Deal? Deal! He draws McCool’s name as Layla looks on disapprovingly. Kaval realizes every name in the hat read Michelle. Layla is pissed.

Match Four: CM Punk (9-16) vs. Christian (7-8)

Del Rio joins Grisham and Striker at the announce table. It should be noted that Christian has a bandage on his forehead. Striker explains Punk lacerated him at a house show in Europe. Christian with a go-behind and a side headlock. Christian covers for one off of a shoulderblock. Repeat spot. Christian runs the ropes and Punk avoids him with a leapfrog but gets caught with another shoulderblock that gets one. They tease a test of strength but Punk goes low. Christian comes back with a slap and his signature middle rope foot press followed by another slap from the outside. Back in, Punk hits with a knee on a charging Christian. A pair of punts to the gut gets Punk two. Backbreaker gets two. Punk locks in a body scissors. Christian escapes but Punk kicks him away. Cover gets two. Christian gets some quick shots at Punk’s gut but Punk comes back with clubs to the back and elbows to the top of the head. Punk sets up for a suplex but Christian fights it off. He goes back to it and hangs him on the top rope. Punk continues with a springboard dropkick sending Christian from the apron to the outside as we go to commercial.

Back from break, Punk has in another body scissors as Del Rio tries to get over a new nickname: The Essence of Excellence. I like it. Christian fights out but Punk locks in an abdominal stretch. Cover gets two. Another backbreaker and Punk plays to the crowd. Punk sends Christian into the corner but Christian puts on the brakes and they run into each other as he turns around. Both men on the mat and the ref starts the count. Both get up at 9.5. They trade blows with Christian getting the advantage. A couple of chops and Christians heads to the middle rope for a spinning back elbow. Punk comes back with an attempt at a G2S which Christian escapes from. Christian gets a cover for two off of a sunset flip from the middle rope. He goes for a Killswitch but Punk reverses into a rollup for two. Christian reverses that into his own rollup that gets two. Punk powers Christian into the corner and hits with shoulderblocks. A running high knee sets up a bulldog which Christian reverses into an inverted DDT that gets two. Del Rio gets on the mic, “On second thought,” distracting Christian and allowing Punk to hit a G2S for the win.

Winner: CM Punk in 11:00

Rating: **3/4 (After a loss to Taker last week, Punk comes back with a (tainted) win over Christian. This was another good match in a nice series of them tonight.)

Post-match, Del Rio sets up a chair over Christian’s body. His answer is still no. Big Show HAULS ASS down the ramp and chases Punk out of the ring. Show turns around to face Del Rio but Punk creeps up from behind and attacks. Show hits his Knockout Punch and stands tall.

Up next, Kane answers The Undertaker’s challenge.

The World Heavyweight Champion makes his way to the ring. This Sunday, the final chapter in the Taker/Kane rivalry will be written. It will not end as it has before with Taker vanquishing his opponent. This time, Kane will be the author of Taker’s demise. The myth will be dispelled and the legend eclipsed. The dark-side will betray Taker as the powers that were once his now belong to Kane. This time, not only will Kane emerge champion, but Taker will become nothing more than a distant memory. It will end on Kane’s terms. Last week, Taker said their match must be No Holds Barred. This is exactly what Kane wanted. Now there will be no rules, no limits…no holds barred. This Sunday, the devil’s favorite demon will make sure Taker will Rest in…

Dong! Taker makes his way out onto the entrance ramp and heads toward the ring. The lights go out. When they come back on, Kane appears behind Taker on the ramp and begins a dominating beatdown all along ringside. They eventually make it into the ring where Kane splashes Taker in the corner and hits snake eyes followed by a big boot. A goozle and a chokeslam put Taker down. Kane motions for a Tombstone with the throat slice as the crowd chants, “Taker, Taker, Taker.” The Tombstone connects and Kane’s corner pyro goes off as he kneels down on one knee, mocking his brother.

(With an ending like that, the PPV victory would usually go to the dominated- in this case, Taker. I’m not going to let that fool me though, Kane has to win at Night of Champions.)