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The Gratuitous B-Movie Column: The Born Losers
The Gratuitous B-Movie Column Issue #503: The Born Losers
The Billy Jack Marathon: Week 1
Hello, everyone, and welcome once again to the internets movie review column that has never had to take on a vicious motorcycle gang singlehandedly, The Gratuitous B-Movie Column, and I am your host Bryan Kristopowitz. In this issue, issue number five hundred and three, The Billy Jack Marathon begins with the movie that started it all, The Born Losers, which hit movie screens in mid-July 1967.
The Born Losers
The Born Losers, also known as Born Losers (it’s the title used in the trailer), is the first in a series of four movies known as “The Billy Jack Franchise,” featuring actor Tom Laughlin as the badass ex-Green Beret sort of hippie half-Indian hapkido master Billy Jack, a hero in a world that really doesn’t have any. The Born Losers, which Laughlin also directed under the pseudonym T.C. Frank, functions as both a straight up action drama/crime movie and an indictment of the establishment/society in general at the time the movie was made. To a certain extent, the movie seems to be saying that if people were more like Billy Jack, the world wouldn’t be the relentless shithole that it is.
The Born Losers takes place in a peaceful little California town called Big Rock, where a motorcycle gang known as the Born Losers has just arrived to cause trouble/engage in mayhem. At first, the young people hanging out on main street are intrigued by the gang, especially a group of young, bikini clad women. Who are these guys on motorcycles? Why are they in town? And what the heck is going on with the Nazi symbols on their hats and jackets and shit? Some of the young women decide to hang out with the gang (they’re attracted to the danger the gang represents?), which turns out to be a massive mistake. The Born Losers, led by supreme scumbag Danny (Jeremy Slate), aren’t in town to celebrate life. The gang is in town to rape as many women as they can. One of those women, Vicky Barrington (Elizabeth James, who wrote the movie’s screenplay under the name James Lloyd), manages to fight back and outsmart the rapists, but the numbers are not in her favor and Vicky ends up getting assaulted, too.
Now, Billy Jack comes into the story after he leaves his trailer out in the woods to come to town to get supplies and whatnot. While in town, Billy Jack saves a guy from being beaten to death by the gang, which leads to Billy Jack being arrested for wielding a rifle in public (some of the gang members are also arrested). Billy Jack is then told by his lawyer that he has to come up with money or he will end up having to serve three months in jail (the gang members will only have to serve a thirty day sentence, which is just outrageous after all the shit they did in public). So Billy Jack has to stick around and figure out how the hell he’s going to come up with the money. Before he went off to kick ass as a Green Beret, Billy Jack was a noted horse breaker, one of the best in the state. Unfortunately, no one in the area needs a horse broken in, and since no one will front him the money, Billy Jack has to figure something else out. How much can he possibly get for selling his jeep? While he tries to figure all of that stuff out, the gang members Billy Jack didn’t beat the shit out of harass him. Have they learned nothing from their first encounter with him? Of course not. Those fucks haven’t learned anything. They’re just waiting to get their asses kicked.
And so the local authorities try to figure out what to do about the gang. The district attorney and the police attempt to convince the gang’s victims to testify in court, but the gang is very adept at witness intimidation. The cops can offer protection now, but what about in six months? Will the cops protect the gang’s victims then? The gang’s victims are also dealing with the whole “rape victims don’t want to testify because they don’t want to re-live the event in public” thing, something the authorities have no idea how to handle. The authorities seem to think that all they need to do is yell at the gang’s victims and loudly make them aware that only they can stop this gang and the victims will “come around” at some point. It never happens. No one in this world seems to understand trauma.
Well, Billy Jack understands trauma. He was in the war. He saw bad shit in the jungles of Vietnam. And, hell, on his way into town he saw multiple animals get killed by other animals. The whole world is a brutal place. Billy Jack also knows that the only way the gang’s bullshit is going to stop is if he goes at them full bore and takes them out. The cops can’t do it because of the law, which is screwed up (think back to the earlier encounter with the gang and the jail sentences all involved would have had to endure). Billy Jack can, though. He isn’t a cop. He’s an ex-Green Beret, sort of hippie half-Indian hapkido master who just wants to live his life but, when the shit goes down, is forced to get involved. And, yeah, he’s going to get involved.
What’s fascinating about The Born Losers is how star and director Laughlin balances the action hero movie stuff and the idea stuff inherent in the story. On the surface, Laughlin knows that he’s making a low budget asshole biker movie, which was a hot cinematic prospect at the time. The Born Losers biker gang members are anti-establishment, they’re dangerous, and they’re attractive, in a weird way, to the youth that inhabit the town. But they’re no good at all. They’re the villains of the story. At the same time, these villains didn’t just pop up out of the ground, fully formed and ready to do evil. The establishment/the old guard/the parents are responsible, in some way, for the creation of the gang. Look at the scene where Danny goes to pick up his brother and his father shows that he, too, is a gigantic piece of shit. Some of the parents of the rape victims are just fucking clueless about the world that they have created/the world that they have allowed to fester, too. They’re concerned about the welfare of their children, but they don’t seem to be all that involved in their lives, either. So what are the parents really concerned about?
I mean, look at the gang. It’s filled with young people who are, yes, pure evil, but they’re also espousing what amounts to a mixed message. The gang, just like the hippies, are against the establishment. They’re rebels (check out the big picture of James Dean on the wall of their hideout). At the same time, they’ve adorned their clothes with Nazi insignia and paint a goddamn Heinrich Himmler quote on the wall. You can’t tell if that Nazi shit is the source of their evil or is just something the gang uses to piss people off. Don’t these people know their world history? It’s obvious that they don’t. Didn’t the establishment teach these kids what the Nazis did? Again, obviously not. The establishment is a mess. The kids in the gang are a mess. The world is a mess. There needs to be a balancing force to sort of even things out.
And that’s where Billy Jack comes in. Billy Jack will “fix” things and balance all of this shit out.
Well, that’s what I see. I’m sure there are other, more in depth interpretations out there that see other stuff going on.
Laughlin is clearly on to something as the hero Billy Jack. The character isn’t fully formed quite yet (for instance, look at Billy Jack’s hat. It’s just a cowboy hat. It isn’t the iconic Billy Jack hat that he would wear in later movies) but the major pieces are all there. Billy Jack is a quiet badass who just wants to live his life, but he’s drawn into a conflict that has nothing to do with him because who else is going to deal with it? Who the heck is going to speak for the victims? Laughlin’s messaging is heartfelt and honest and, I’d suspect, is why he made the movie in the first place. It’s also why you end up liking Bill Jack more than if he was just a badass guy who likes to beat the crap out of bad guys. Laughlin and Billy Jack really mean it.
Elizabeth James is terrific as Vicky Barrington. She may wear a bikini through most of the movie and participate in all of the typical young people things (hanging out with friends, swimming at the beach, wearing a bikini in public like it’s clothing), but she’s a little smarter than the “typical” young person. She’s smart, she’s tough, she isn’t afraid of getting in the face of the Born Losers and doing whatever it takes to get away. She almost succeeds. When she’s a victim of the gang she doesn’t allow it to define her, and she makes an effort to be defiant towards the gang’s future threats against her. It’s also interesting how, despite having friends and a social life at the college she’s enrolled at, Vicky is a loner at heart. She’s like a less experienced version of Billy Jack. She could be a female Billy Jack after the movie (she’d have to learn a martial art but that probably wouldn’t take long). James also wrote a great script.
Jeremy Slate is the ultimate scumbag as Born Losers motorcycle gang leader Danny. He’s into violence and just general reprehensible behavior, and he’s happy about it. He’s just so terrible that you can’t wait to see him go down. Slate also gives Danny a smoothness that helps explain how he likely convinced so many people to join up with his gang and how he maintained control for so long. People respond to that kind of thing and get off on it. You know, that whole “people respect confidence” thing. I think you’ll enjoy the way Billy Jack destroys him. The only thing that would have made Danny’s comeuppance even better is if Billy Jack got to beat the fucking shit out of him for like five minutes before shooting him in the head (that’s not much of a spoiler considering it’s in the trailer).
Jeff Cooper is quite the scumbag, too, as Born Loser gang member Gangrene. He’s an uber confident prick and arrogant sack of shit who actually thinks he’s going to take on Billy Jack hand-to-hand. In fact he makes it clear at least once that he intends to beat up “the Indian.” Absolutely ludicrous. Robert W. Tessier is a big piece of shit, too, as Cueball. Hell, all of the gang members are terrible people. The only exception is the one female gang member that tries to help Vicky escape. Her moment of clarity in helping Vicky make a break for it shows that some of the gang members may not be a total lost cause. Some of them may be redeemable. Maybe.
The great Jack Starrett shows up as a local sheriff’s deputy named Fred. He hates the Born Losers and Danny but he doesn’t seem to know how to combat them. The actual sheriff, played by Stuart Lancaster, is just as clueless. If only Paul Bruce’s District Attorney George Davis was any good at his job.
The Born Losers could have been improved if Laughlin had infused the story with a greater sense of urgency. The movie also could have used a few more fight scenes/action scenes. It doesn’t necessarily need anything major, but the movie’s super deliberate pace can be grating at times. There are scenes throughout the movie that could have been sped up to just help move things along. Still, even with that deliberate pace, The Born Losers is a great, heartfelt action drama and a great way to start off what would become a four movie franchise. Tom Laughlin really was on to something when he came up with Billy Jack. He really was.
See The Born Losers. See it, see it, see it.
So what do we have here?
Dead bodies: 1
Explosions: None.
Nudity?: None.
Doobage: The woods, a waterfall, hawks eating a rabbit, a rifle and a propane tank, a motorcycle gang, sunglasses breaking, window smashing, street violence, blatant racism, a bright yellow suit, spitting, spit eating, deliberate tire puncturing, swimming, a dead sea otter covered in flies, impromptu public motorcycle drag racing, a motorcycle crash, a sort of motorcycle chase, rampant misogyny, a gang hideout, off screen rape, a wholly inappropriate remark about rape, a total lack of acid, metal pipe to the back of the head, running, TV watching, sexy dancing, stuffed animal hooey, serious witness intimidation, a full on attack on baby talk, a car prank, a serious back cracking, a man-on-man kiss that’s disturbing because it’s done by members of a Nazi biker gang that would normally frown on that kind of thing, attempted dinner at a buffet, totally necessary police brutality, burglary, putting out a cigar in a glass of beer, a rubber mallet, hat stealing, hat defacing, a totally one-sided fight, bike stealing, moonlight talk, kidnaping, crowbar to the back of the head, a rape agreement, knee to the balls, more off screen rape, a massive bike fire, a bullet right between the eyes, and a totally unsafe chopper ride.
Kim Richards?: None.
Gratuitous: A guy using a waterfall as a shower, Tom Laughlin, a nature montage, a VW Bug, a door that says “No Guns Beyond This Point,” hippie college girls learning Spanish, causing a public disturbance, young women in bikinis, a woman dancing in a bikini and holding a snake, a Heinrich Himmler quote on the wall, a guy that doesn’t have a tongue, a young woman listening to records, a magic trick box, a discussion of astrological bullshit, an attack on the establishment, a picture of James Dean on the wall, and a totally unsafe chopper ride.
Best lines: “Hey, you bumped into my bike, son,” “You keep your mouth shut and your dirty thoughts to yourself, son,” “All right, that’s it. Move on,” “You’re in over your head, Indian!,” “Don’t they just give you the creeps?,” “If you get on that motorcycle you’re dead,” “Hey, Kemosabe, did they teach you how to read in squaw school?,” “Hey Fred! Troopers! Hoo!,” “Get off the bike, chick. Let’s get a look at you,” “Tell Crawford I want the money in cash. Tell him I don’t trust banks,” “Why do you call him crabs? Because he’s got’em!,” “Well, does that complete my initiation?,” “Is this the only way you can get a woman?,” “Oh, what a bunch of finky bad guys,” “Remember, all you need is one witness to obtain an indictment. We have five,” “Ferdinand, you dirty old man. You ain’t seen nothing yet,” “Excuse me, but this is the bedroom,” “Hey, man. That’s class,” “Hey! Hey, miss! Aren’t you Vicky Barrington?,” “You’re not very fast, are ya?,” “I’m awfully sorry about that. I guess I turned without looking,” “Nice kids. Stars are against them, though,” “Aren’t there bear up there?,” “You know, Billy, I admire your guts,” “Hey, guys, how about we all jump in the shower together, okay?,” “It’s Sunday. How come you boys aren’t in church?,” “How about it, chick? You want to ride with us? That’s about as intelligent as asking me if I want the bubonic plague,” “Do you plan on fighting or talking me to death?,” “Why’d you call me an ape? Because you’re cute,” “Uh, you going somewhere, little mother?,” “Go to hell. What? Go to hell,” “Damn you, I liked it! I liked it! I liked it!,” “When did the whole goddamn system go wrong?,” and “Spunky little thing, ain’t she?
Rating: 8.5/10.0
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Things to Watch Out For
–The Man Who Killed Hitler and then the Bigfoot: I reviewed this flick not that long ago. The movie is decent enough, but it’s really not the insane movie the title suggests. It’s actually kind of mundane and sweet, in a way. Sam Elliott is miscast but he does a good job and, well, even though I didn’t think the movie was superb, it’s worth checking out at least once. Check out my full review of the movie here, and then pick up the DVD. Larry Miller is fabulous in this movie.
–Pledge: The fine folks at Shout! Factory/Scream Factory are behind the release of this low budget horror flick, so you know that the home video release will, at least, be awesome. The movie, as far as I can tell, seems to be about people pledging a college fraternity and then bad shit happening to them because the fraternity isn’t just a fraternity. Or something like that. According to imdb the movie is 77 minutes long, so it’s not like this is going to be a major use of your time. That’s always cool. Anyone out there see this?
–A Violent Man: This appears to be some sort of low budget crime drama featuring the world of mixed martial arts, so maybe it’s a riff on a boxing/crime movie with MMA in it instead. That’s the vibe I’m getting about it. And, sure, we’ve all seen that kind of movie a million times before, but isn’t it all in the execution? Thomas Q. Jones stars alongside Chuck Liddell, Denise Richards, and Bruce Davison. That’s a pretty good cast, isn’t it?
–Bumblebee: I missed this Transformers spin-off when it was in theatres, but then I missed the last two Transformers, the ones with Mark Wahlberg in them, so I’m not that surprised that I missed Bumblebee. Still, this looked fun, and the reviews for it were surprisingly good. I didn’t think that would ever happen. Now, with Bumblebee on home video, what better time to check it out? Anyone out there see this? Is it as good as the reviews suggest it is?
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Do you like Cult TV?
The 1985 action show Street Hawk is the column’s current focus! See what I said about the first episode here!!
And check out what I said about the entire run of Kolchak: The Night Stalker!
Issue #1
Issue #2
Issue #3
Issue #4
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B-Movie News
–Fangoria movie V.F.W. set to have all-star badass cast!: The recently announced horror flick V.F.W. starring Stephen Lang is going to have an all-star badass cast, according to this article over at Action Flix. The proposed movie, which is about a team of old school military veterans protecting an innocent woman from a band of mutant punks at a VFW post, will apparently have William Sadler, David Patrick Kelly, George Wendt, Fred “The Hammer” Williamson, and Martin fucking Kove alongside Lang. Holy crap that’s an awesome cast.
I mean, Kove and The Hammer in the same movie? Why don’t they already have a series of movies together? And David Patrick Kelly, Luther from 48 Hrs.? When was the last time we saw him in a true blue badass role? John Wick? William Sadler is always cool to see in anything. And George Wendt? I thought he would get more badass roles after Kingdom of the Ants, but that didn’t happen. Maybe this movie will be a turning point for him.
Now, this movie hasn’t started filming, so there’s a chance that in the coming days and weeks this whole thing could fall apart. Think about how many movies and TV shows get announced and then never happen? But, for my money, this concept is way too awesome not to happen.
Who will the production get for the head mutant punk? Will we even get a head mutant punk?
Man, I hope V.F.W. happens. This could be a modern classic.
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Check out my Widow’s Point set visit report!
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Who is the Douchebag of the Week? Go here and find out!
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Next Issue: The Billy Jack marathon continues with 1971’s Billy Jack!
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Interviews
david j. moore
Jino Kang
Vladimir Kulich
Paul Mormando
Michael Matteo Rossi
Tyrone Magnus
Hector Barron
Jeffrey Orgill
Michael Baumgarten
R. Marcos Taylor
Don “The Dragon” Wilson
Paul Kyriazi
Eric Jacobus
Juju Chan
Luke LaFontaine
Marco Siedlemann
Sam Firstenberg
Amariah Olson
Alexander Nevsky
Mathias Hues
Kristanna Loken
Steve Mitchell
Albert Pyun
Brad Thornton
Mathieu Ratthe
Damien Power
Kelsey Carlisle
Mike Dwyer
Nicholas Bushman
Brahim Achabbakhe
Etcetera
Richard LeMay
Andrew David Barker
Cynthia Rothrock
Leslie Simpson
C. Courtney Joyner
Eric Miller
Alexander Nevsky (2)
Christopher Lawrence Chapman
James Mark
Casper Van Dien
Chris Mark
James E. Wilson
Barry Hunt
Vincent J. Roth
Mathew Ziff
Brandon Tyler Russell
Barry Hunt (2)
Lobsang Tenzin
Dylan Reynolds
Paul Kyriazi(2)
Lincoln Bevers
Nassasin Nuri
Hannah Janssen
Harry Mok
Daniel Roebuck
Sage Croft
Stephen van Vuuren
Cheryl Wheeler Sanders
Eric Jacobus (2)
David William No
Nicholas Verdi
Luke LaFontaine (2)
Roger Yuan
Dominik Starck
Tamas Nadas
Tyler Savage
Robert McGinley
Tim Gouran
Billy Ray Brewton
Leo Scherman
Harley Di Nardo
Jino Kang(2)
Alexander Nevsky (3)
Steve Latshaw
Rick Hurst
Douglas Burke
Jeff Farley
Fred “The Hammer” Williamson
Nico Sentner
Everett Ray Aponte
Max Martini
Tom Huckabee
Jason Kellerman
David Tarleton
Roxy Shih
Jesse V. Johnson
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Well, I think that’ll be about it for now. Don’t forget to sign up with disqus if you want to comment on this article and any other 411 article. You know you want to, so just go do it.
B-movies rule. Always remember that.
The Born Losers
Tom Laughlin– Billy Jack
Elizabeth James– Vicky Barrington
Jeremy Slate– Danny
Jack Starrett– Deputy Fred
Jeff Cooper– Gangrene
Robert W. Tessier– Cueball
William Wellman Jr.– Child
Paul Bruce– District Attorney George Davis
Paul Prokop– Speechless
(check out the rest of the cast here)
Directed by Tom Laughlin (as T.C. Frank)
Screenplay by Elizabeth James (as James Lloyd)
Distributed by American International Pictures and Shout! Factory
Rated PG for violence and adult situations
Runtime– 113 minutes
Buy it here
