wrestling / Video Reviews
The Name on the Marquee: Smoky Mountain Wrestling (5.1.1993)
Loading...-Originally aired May 1, 1993.
-We’re in Barbourville, KY.
-Your hosts are Bob Caudle & Dutch Mantell. Dutch draws the Beat the Champ challenger, and it’s Brian Lee.
“Wild Eyed Southern Boy” TRACY SMOTHERS (SMW Champion) vs THE AVENGER
-So I’m thinking Chris Candido’s push won’t be starting for at least another week.
-Bodypress by Smothers. Corner charge and a dropkick when Mr. Ron Wright wheels his way out to do some scouting. Dirty White Boy joins commentary and suspects that Smothers has a big yellow streak running down his back because Smothers won’t face him in a match where he has to keep DWB’s shoulders down for a three-count. I love that; the chain match is DWB’s idea, and when he loses, he calls Smothers a coward for not beating him in a normal match. Classic heel.
-Mr. Wright waves the white flag at ringside while Avenger gets a brief advantage, but he misses a top rope splash, and the jawjack finishes.
-After the bell, DWB charges into the ring and immediately takes a beating. Mr. Wright passes him some brass knuckles and DWB knocks Smothers unconscious, then pulls out a can of spraypaint and gives Smothers a big yellow streak down his back. Tim Horner comes to the rescue.
-Bob Caudle talks to Smothers and Horner afterward. Tim Horner reminds us that he used to be a heel and he can play dirty if Dirty White Boy wants to play dirty. Well, I mean, his name is literally “Dirty,” so…
-Bob Caudle talks to Brian Lee, but Tammy Fytch interrupts and makes an offer. Bob Armstrong comes out to shut her up, saying she got the TV time she wanted last week and if she wants to get to scout wrestlers, she can do it on her own time, not interrupt TV segments. Brian Lee tells Tammy “If I want a woman to tell me what to do, I’ll get married and you ain’t my type.” He walks off, and Tammy rolls her eyes and says he must not be very secure about his masculinity. Again, you can see this woman s going places.
-Join the Rock & Roll Express Official Fan Club today! You’ll get membership buttons, quarterly newsletters, photos, and entered into contests to win Ricky & Robert’s jackets and tights!
-Mr. Wright and Dirty White Boy are cracking up about their evil scheme. Everybody who comes to the Coward Waves the Flag match better have a strong stomach ‘cause it’s gonna be bloody.
-Rock & Roll Express promises to tar & feather the Heavenly Bodies in Hazard, KY.
ROCK & ROLL EXPRESS vs PAUL LEE & SCOTT CAMPIONE
-Double backdrop and a bulldog on Campione as the commentators talk about the upcoming Rage in a Cage and the upcoming Last Tangle in Tennessee. This COULD be the last time that we ever see the Rock & Roll Express as a tag team, they tell us, which makes me a little wary of spending $19.95 on a newsletter that’s only going to last one issue.
-Lee tags in and quickly eats a double dropkick for three.
-We get words from the Stud Stable. They’re willing to co-exist with the Rock & Roll Express as partners at Rage in a Cage, as long as Rock & Roll Express holds up their end of the deal and does their fair share of the fighting, AND they want to face whichever team still exists after the Last Tangle in Tennessee.
-Bob Caudle talks to the Rock & Roll Express. They agree to the Stable’s terms and conditions, but if Stable double crosses them, there’s gonna be hell to pay.
-We get a commercial for the Last Tangle in Tennessee, with an inappropriate song that sounds like The Express and the Bodies are going to spend 45 minutes hugging and watching home movies together in the ring.
DOWN AND DIRTY WITH DUTCH
-Dutch welcomes Kevin Sullivan. Dutch gives him a word association test, and Sullivan describes incredibly violent imagery for everything. Dutch says “Cage” and Kevin calmly says “a tranquil walk near a waterfall.”
HEAVENLY BODIES (Tag Team Champions, with Jim Cornette) vs ROBBIE EAGLE & BOBBY BLAZE
-I’m just now starting to realize what a common name “Robert” seems to be for wrestlers in the south.
-Pritchard chops Eagle and drives elbows into the back of his head. Elbow misses and in comes Bobby Blaze. Bodies make a tag behind his back, but Blaze actually anticipates and hiptosses Stan Lane. Neckbreaker by Lane, followed by a Russian legsweep, so now the Bodies have control. They work the back of Blaze.
-Lane misses a corner charge and tags Eagle. Eagle actually fights off both opponents, but Pritchard rebounds and hits a powerbomb out of nowhere to get the win.
-Corny hypes the Rage in a Cage, which, again, is WarGames with a coat of paint slapped across it. Bob Armstrong shows up to announce that he’s going to be the referee for the match and he’s going to keep one eye on Jim Cornette through the whole thing. Pritchard tells Cornette to call his mom right now and stop this.
BEAT THE CHAMP TV TITLE: BEAUTIFUL BOBBY EATON (Champion, with Jim Cornette) vs “Prime Time” BRIAN LEE
-This is Eaton’s fifth defense, so he gets $5,000 and vacates the belt if he wins. Because of Bob Armstrong’s edict, he also has to leave SMW no matter what. Fans are pretty stoked for this one, too.
-Lee shoves Eaton to the mat. Hard shoulderblock knocks Eaton all the way out to the floor. Eaton comes back in and tries to get a quick pin by pulling the tights, but Lee kicks out of that easily. Eaton tosses Lee out to the floor and they brawl out there for a bit. I think they’ve miked the bare floor, and it’s actually pretty effective when Eaton lands with a THUD on a backdrop. Lee gets shoved into the post and they both head back in.
-Eaton goes for a clothesline but Lee ducks, and connects with one of his own…FOR THREE! That was unexpected. Brian Lee is your new TV champion. Heavenly Bodies and Killer Kyle show up to kick some ass after the bell. Rock & Roll Express makes the save, and we have a crazy brawl.
-We get words from the Stud Stable, basically saying they didn’t come to the brawl because they don’t like the idea that the Express needs somebody to bail them out when they get into trouble.
-Okay, so I’m missing the May 8 episode of SMW, but WWE.com actually has a clip of the show on their main site because of a History of Smoky Mountain Wrestling article they did a while back. And the clip they have is kind of an important angle, so let’s cover that…
-Jimmy Golden vs. Stan Lane is your feature match. Jim Cornette attempts to interfere, bungles it, and then Bob Armstrong runs in and counts the pin to give the match to Jimmy Golden.
-Cornette storms over to Bob Caudle and cuts the promo of promos on Bob Armstrong about what an embarrassment he is to professional wrestling…and to his own family. Case in point, Dixie Dy-no-mite, the guy that wrestles with a Confederate flag mask covering his face. Jim Cornette reveals that it’s Bob’s son, Scott Armstrong, covering his face and using a silly fake name because he’s ashamed of his father.
-So Dixie Dy-no-mite walks out and denies being ashamed of his family, and to prove it, he takes off the mask and officially renounces the Dixie Dy-no-mite gimmick, which means I never have to type that name again. Scott Armstrong explains that he covered his face and wrestled under a phony name because he knew that if his dad was the commissioner and he went out there with the Armstrong name and became a big star, a whiny mama’s boy would complain that he was getting preferential treatment because of his daddy. He was trying to hide his identity because he wanted to prove he could be a star without his dad’s name.
-Out comes Commissioner Bob Armstrong, who says that if Corny has anything to say to him, don’t make it a family issue, just say it to Bob’s face. Corny calls him “Ernest T. Bass”, which cracks me up, and calls him out for trying to screw Cornette from the moment SMW launched. Drill sergeants hide behind their stripes, cops hide behind their badge, and Bob Armstrong hides behind his tie. As long as he dresses up like a commissioner, he knows no one will do anything. Armstrong takes off the tie and says he’s not a commissioner NOW, he’s just a man. Cornette goes off on a rant about Armstrong’s stinkin’ family, like Brad in Atlanta, Steve wherever the hell he is, Peanut Head who just ripped off his mask (Dixie Dy-no-mite was Teddy Long the whole time?!), and especially Brian, the Marine deserter who went to Iraq and then ran off and hid somewhere, and THAT’s the one that finally pulls the trigger for Armstrong, who decks Cornette and leaves him laying with a single punch.
