The Independent Mid-Card 01.01.08: Stalker vs. Fuji

Happy New Year, and welcome to this week’s edition of The Independent Mid-Card. This past weekend was filled with notable happenings at Ring of Honor’s year-end shows, so in honor of a bevy of title changes and injuries… I’m going to totally ignore everything topical and just do a feel-good comedy match that I really enjoyed recently. Feeling the need for something topical? Then look elsewhere, because this week is a happy-go-lucky celebration here in the IMC.

Stalker Ichikawa Z vs. Don Fuji
Pro Wrestling Guerrilla – Dynamite Duumvirate Tag Team Title Tournament, Night 1 – Burbank, CA – May 19, 2007

The Wrestlers:
Stalker Ichikawa Z – Widely considered the top comedy wrestler in Japan’s Dragon Gate promotion, Stalker Ichikawa Z was a graduate of the second class of Ultimo Dragon’s Toryumon Dojo. Appearing to be some sort of butterfly or other insect, Ichikawa, who is Dragon Gate’s official mascot, has had the opportunity to face off with (and lose to) a who’s who of Japanese wrestling during his career, including dominating defeats to Pro Wrestling NOAH’s Jun Akiyama and All Japan’s Toshiaki Kawada. In coming to California for Pro Wrestling Guerrilla’s DDT4 weekend, Stalker would be making his United States debut.

Don Fuji – A member of the first Toryumon Dojo graduating class and a former Dragon Gate Open the Dream Gate Champion, Don Fuji was a charter member of the powerful Crazy MAX and Blood Generation Stables. A highly regarded singles competitor throughout Japan, Fuji has been a loner in Dragon Gate ever since the breakup of Blood Generation, losing the Open the Dream Gate Title mere months before coming to the United States to appear for Pro Wrestling Guerrilla. Fuji has also been traditionally known for his kleptomania, having stolen over the years a variety of signature items from his fellow wrestlers.

The Match:
As always with Pro Wrestling Guerrilla, the commentary is on an alternate audio track, but I am going to watch the match without it, mostly so I can more clearly understand what Stalker Ichikawa Z is saying at any given moment.

We begin with Stalker reading a prepared speech, explaining that he has come to the United States to show everyone that he is the strongest wrestler in Japan. He challenges Don Fuji (who is literally taking a nap on the ropes while this is going on) to a hardcore match, and promises that Fuji will surely not survive. Stalker already has a chair in the ring with him and shows it to the crowd before heading to his corner.

With that out of the way, the match is announced for one fall with a thirty-minute time limit. Stalker Ichikawa Z is introduced first, and some of the fans take the opportunity to get cute and literally throw in the towel for him before the match even starts. Fuji is announced next, but doesn’t move from his perch on the ropes. The referee goes over and taps him on the shoulder to, believe it or not, wake him up. Once Fuji is awake, he gets a nice streamer treatment from the Burbank fans. The streamers are removed from the ring and the bell is sounded to start us off.

The two men circle as the very vocal crowd claps for them. Stalker does some “intimidating” martial arts posing, but cowers into the corner when Fuji postures by bouncing off of the ropes. Fuji goes in for a lockup, but Stalker twirls away. Stalker pulls off his fake ears (as the crowd ‘ooh’s and ‘ahh’s ) and then throws them at Fuji. The incredulous look on Fuji’s face is priceless. Fuji goes for a shop, but Stalker ducks under it and gets some overhand chops before raking the eyes. Stalker runs off the ropes and gets a shoulder block, but Fuji falls back and bounces off the ropes himself, rebounding into his own shoulderblock that sends Stalker flying across the ring.

Fuji continues the assault with a bodyslam and a big elbowdrop before tossing one of Stalker’s fake ears into the crowd, actually earning him a bit of heel heat in the process. Fuji chops Stalker into the corner and gets a cross-corner whip, but Stalker slingshots over him on the blind charge. Stalker gets a drop toehold on Fuji when he comes running, and walks on his back on the way to the corner, but a springboard cross body block off of the second turnbuckle misses and Stalker just splats on the canvas. Fuji knocks the antennae off of Stalker’s head (again, much to the chagrin of the crowd) and tosses one of them to the fans.

Fuji picks up Stalker and hits a front-throw backdrop suplex. I would be remiss in not mentioning how hilariously awesome Stalker’s oversell of everything is. Fuji then hits a sideslam right into a cover for two. Fuji just starts hitting stiff kicks to Stalker’s back as he writhes in pain on the mat, but eventually pulls Stalker to his feet and gets poked in the eyes for his trouble. Stalker grabs a knucklelock and climbs to the top for a rope walk, but mid-way across the ropes, Fuji switches his hand out, forcing the referee to hold Stalker’s hand instead. Fuji makes a big production out of running off the ropes, thus crotching Stalker on the top rope and having him land like a bag of bricks on the mat below.

Fuji comes running, but Stalker is able to get a drop toehold that lands him on the bottom rope. Stalker follows up with a low-angle 6-1-9 (spinning rope assisted front kick) and covers, but Fuji kicks out at one and the momentum actually sends Stalker all the way to the floor. Stalker recovers and trips up Fuji, pulling him over to the corner and crotching him around the ring post. Stalker, unsatisfied with his own leverage, then brings a fan over to help pull on Fuji’s legs. The referee finally admonishes the fan and forces him back to his seat, but when Fuji comes out to go after him, Stalker stays on offense with a double axehandle to the back. That doesn’t last long, however, as Fuji reverses a whip and sends Stalker crashing into the ring post. Fuji then prompts the fans to move and whips Stalker into the fifth row of chairs.

Fuji grabs a chair and just starts pasting Stalker in the back with it on the outside, before rolling him back in and continuing to blast him with the chair. Fuji rolls out and throws a few more chairs in the ring. He signals for a big move and sets up for a powerbomb, but Stalker reverses mid-move, landing Fuji headfirst on the chairs with a hurricanrana. Stalker sets up a chair and springs off of it into a double chop that puts Fuji down in the corner.

Stalker tosses the chair to ringside and then climbs to the second rope before diving off with the Kanchou (butt poke), which is certainly as annoying for Fuji as it is painful. Fuji drops to his knees, so Stalker calls for one more and this time climbs all the way to the top. A top-rope Kanchou (the word, by the way, is Japanese for ‘enema’) follows and Stalker uses La Majistral to roll Fuji up for a close two count. Stalker calls for a German suplex, but can’t get it and ends up landing his own head on the mat in a moment that made me laugh out loud the first time I saw it. Fuji nonchalantly goes for the cover, but it only gets two.

Fuji goes for a chokeslam, but Stalker slips out of it, only to get caught with an overhand strike. Stalker catches Fuji’s leg on a kick attempt and gets a dragon screw legwhip followed by a Shining Wizard (running knee strike to the head), complete with Muta posing. Stalker then grabs his original chair out of the corner (remember, this was the one he had with him during his pre-match speech) and readies it for a huge swing at Fuji, but Fuji ducks out of the way and the chair shot ricochets off the ropes right back into Stalker’s face. He actually manages to then fall backwards, hitting his head on the very same chair again on the mat, and Fuji makes the cover for the pinfall at 7:40. Fuji celebrates and poses for the crowd as we cut out.

The Analysis:
Pure fun here with little or no psychology or long-term impact. Basically this match was here to showcase Fuji as a solid worker and Stalker as a goof. It succeeded on both counts and was a perfectly harmless use of eight minutes.

You want more in-depth analysis? Seriously?

Umm… Err… Why don’t I just reiterate that Stalker’s overselling of everything (including saying ‘oww’ over and over again) is absolutely hilarious and honestly, as strange as it sounds, there are a lot of big time wrestlers who could benefit from selling half as well as he does. Selling is something of a lost art on the Independent scene these days, and yet somehow comedy wrestlers seem to always figure out a way to make their opponent look devastating (or at the very least credible).

The Aftermath:
Don Fuji would take part in a Four Way match the next night but would not be involved in the decision as Human Tornado pinned Bino Gambino. Stalker Ichikawa Z would have less luck, losing in the opening match yet again, this time to Top Gun Talwar. As of this writing, neither man has subsequently appeared for Pro Wrestling Guerrilla.

However, Stalker Ichikawa Z would undergo something of a transformation upon his return to Japan. Given his “immensely successful” weekend in California, Stalker would give up his “Z” moniker and be known from then on as “Hollywood” Stalker Ichikawa. Also, he would create the Open the Owarai Gate Title, a comedy belt with a complicated (and silly) set of rules, used almost exclusively as a vanity belt for the fan favorite. The belt, which is now no longer held by Stalker, had actually been retained on more than one occasion simply because Stalker’s opponent felt sorry for him. Most recently for Don Fuji, he earned a main event win in six man tag team action in Dragon Gate, defeating Masaaki Mochizuki, K-Ness & Susumu Yokosuka while fighting alongside Shingo Takagi and longtime ally CIMA.

The Final Word:
I’ll get back to more newsworthy topics next week, but for this week, take a cue from this column and comb your collection for a good old fashioned comedy match. Pretty much anything with Delirious or “Classic” Colt Cabana should do fine. Have one of their matches against each other? All’s the better.

To see this week’s matchup, Dynamite Duumvirate Tag Team Title Tournament, Night 1 is available at prowrestlingguerrilla.com. The highlight of the card is a tremendous first-time-ever match between CIMA and “American Dragon” Bryan Danielson, but the show also features the first round of the DDT4. Included in that is a match between the Briscoes and the Kings of Wrestling, a pairing that always yields great results.

While you’re here at 411mania, check out some of the other great columns and reviews from the last week. Ari Berenstein put together a tour de force for Column of Honor’s Final Column 2007 which you can check out in the following parts: One, Two, Three, Four, Five, and Six. I’m in part five, so feel free to jump to that if you choose. Bayani’s Truth B Told is around as well this week and as always contains pictures of scantily clad women. Brad & Campbell were in the most recent Fact or Fiction, while Campbell went solo on one of my personal favorite topics (CHIKARA) in his most recent edition of The Tiger’s Take. The most recent Buy or Sell is the first ever Three Way Dance, as Brad, Ari & I take one last look at 2007. The ROH Roundtable got spotlight treatment over the weekend, so you really owe it to yourself to read that one, and as always, for a dose of Puro, you’ve GOT to check out The Navigation Log from Short and Destiny from Adamson. In terms of reviews, Campbell’s got a look at NOAH Shiny Navigation 2007 and Dunn’s got ROH Death Before Dishonor V, Night Two covered.

This week in Buy or Sell, we’ll have a look at what to expect from Japan in 2008, while the ROH Roundtable will be back on the shelf until the first shows of the year in a week-and-a-half.

No new TV stuff again due to the holidays and the strike, so again, I present to you the last 5 songs played on my iTunes.

1. “Leatherman” by Pearl Jam – from Live 11.6.2000 in Seattle, WA
2. “What Happened” by Sublime – from 40 Oz. To Freedom
3. “Muzzle” by Smashing Pumpkins – from Mellon Collie & the Infinite Sadness
4. “10 A.M. Automatic” by The Black Keys – from Rubber Factory
5. “All She Wrote” by Ross Copperman – from All She Wrote EP

And as always, please be sure to swing by The Cool Kids’ Table. We’ve got some big stuff in the works, and already have some post-game discussion of ROH’s year end shows up for you to check out.

Happy New Year again everyone. I’ll save y’all the year end soul searching that has become something of a tradition for me, but suffice that I hope that no matter what your 2007 was like, that you have a better year in 2008.

“Sometimes you hit the brakes, but you can’t slow down…”
-Bob Schneider, I’m Good Now

308 to 6. The Cool Kids’ Table. Ole!

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